Where Has My Aim Polygone?

Amaror

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Apr 15, 2011
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Haha, yeah I watched the "best of" of that video. It was hilarious. Let me just go straight up to that enemy in order use my shotgun to shoot him straight in the ... ground. Over his shoulder. Multiple times.
 

Andy Shandy

Fucked if I know
Jun 7, 2010
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"It looks like the kind of footage you'd see playing in black and white over sad violin music before a toll-free number asks you to donate and help save a life today." Fucking hell Grey, you can't just put that in there without any warning. Damn near killed me.

Anyway, yeah, while I like some of what Polygon does a lot - their deep dives and Monster Factory are both delights - that DOOM video was just bad.
 

sXeth

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Nov 15, 2012
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Huh, I'll have to go have a gander at this video.

I know one of the LPers I sub on youtube was playing it and trying to take potshots out of cover with the charged pistol. Then wondering why it was so hard. Their series seems to have stalled when the Hell Knights showed up, predictably.
 

Dango

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Feb 11, 2010
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So there's nothing wrong with being the kind of person who only plays games made by people trying to art there way out of game design, but maybe that's not the kind of person you want playing Doom for your game website.
 

Mikeybb

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Aug 19, 2014
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Do you think someone told them that to get the real, true DOOM experience you have to play it for the first time with mouselook turned off?

You know, arrow keys for movement.
Pageup pagedown for looking around.
 

Bob_McMillan

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Aug 28, 2014
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It would be really sad if it turned out he is an MLG PC player. I've seen some PC guys play on console before, and it looks EXACTLY like that video.

That said, he or she is really rather terrible at the game. I hope that it was a controller issue or perhaps an injury, because a person who plays like that does not belong at a capture event.
 
Mar 30, 2010
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Jeez, that video just keeps morphing between hilarious and dire. I hope for the sake of the reviewer that they were trying some kind of Ironman challenge where they could only hold the controller in one hand, or something.
 

Karadalis

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Apr 26, 2011
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A somewhat political incorrect jab at polygon? Color me pleasantly surprised.

Also very reasonable and fair explanation... and also spot on why people make so much fun of polygon for their horrendously inept video.
 

Gorrath

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Feb 22, 2013
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That video, lol. I was laughing all the way through the inept part, but when the Nvidia part started and Still from Geto Boys kicked in I fucking lost it.
 

Elfgore

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Dec 6, 2010
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I got to see what appears to be a five year old play Doom and see Djent get blasted. Pretty good Critical Miss I'd say.
 

SweetShark

Shark Girls are my Waifus
Jan 9, 2012
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Mikeybb said:
Do you think someone told them that to get the real, true DOOM experience you have to play it for the first time with mouselook turned off?

You know, arrow keys for movement.
Pageup pagedown for looking around.
Being able to play recently the second game of Marathon Series, I only used the keyboard. It was surprisingly easy if you get use to it.
 

Blazing Hero

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Feb 20, 2015
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Haha, nice to see that everyone of all strokes can agree that Polygon made a mistake putting that video up. Just goes to show that you shouldn't play games with your feet when you are showcasing them for the general public.
 

Imperioratorex Caprae

Henchgoat Emperor
May 15, 2010
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SweetShark said:
Mikeybb said:
Do you think someone told them that to get the real, true DOOM experience you have to play it for the first time with mouselook turned off?

You know, arrow keys for movement.
Pageup pagedown for looking around.
Being able to play recently the second game of Marathon Series, I only used the keyboard. It was surprisingly easy if you get use to it.
For honesty, I started playing Quake back in the day with just keyboard, no mouse. I was pretty damn good at it in deathmatch considering the heavy handicap I had in hindsight. However a friend of mine introduced me to +mlook. I never looked back (and I started playing with a Logitech thumb-trackball and didn't switch to a regular mouse until I bought my first optical mouse by Microsoft... which incidentally had thumb buttons).

Logitech Trackman Marble


Microsoft Optical Mouse (1999)
 

kimiyoribaka

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Jul 11, 2012
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Mikeybb said:
Do you think someone told them that to get the real, true DOOM experience you have to play it for the first time with mouselook turned off?

You know, arrow keys for movement.
Pageup pagedown for looking around.
That wouldn't so much be the real, true DOOM experience as it would be the real, true Duke Nukem 3d experience or the real, true Heretic/Hexen experience. The original Doom didn't have vertical looking at all because that would have complicated the rendering process. That said, the person in video probably would've been better off that way.
 

Fiz_The_Toaster

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That was the first time I ever saw that Polygon video, and that physically hurt me.

Music was on point for that though.
 

RJ 17

The Sound of Silence
Nov 27, 2011
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Well that's what happens when all your content creators are busy with something else and you're absolutely DESPERATE to get a DOOM video out in the first wave of DOOM videos. You stick your head out the office door, see the 60 year old janitor down the hallway, and say "YOU! YOU! GET IN HERE, QUICK!"

So you drag him in, sit his ass in front of a tv, stuff a controller into his hand, and say "Now have at it!"
 

Worgen

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Whatever, just wash your hands.
Wait, how is the new doom more shallow than the original?
 

Darth_Payn

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"inb4 metal fans claiming you'll never TRULY GRASP the genius of Meshuggah without a doctorate in eight -string-theory chugganomics"
At this point, you guys are just baiting that kind of reaction, thus forming a self-fulfilling prophecy.
But the Polygon video, ouch. I thought it should be black-and-white, sped up, and put to old-timey piano music to complete the vaudeville experience.
 

CaitSeith

Formely Gone Gonzo
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Jun 30, 2014
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It's either that explanation, or the player had no previous gaming experience other than Spunkgargleweewees.