Which obscure gods hate YOU?

[II2]

Choronzon

Thelemic Demon of Dispersion, 16th century

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The Dice Gods and the RNG have always been fickle beings, but they seem to forsake me quite often. I don't know how I've offended them, but apparently they won't give me too many good rolls.

The Dice Gods. They do exist, and anyone who tells you otherwise it wrong.

A pity. They have oft consented to smile upon me, even blessing my two fist sized d20s with natural 20's on both of their respective christening rolls. I do not know exactly what I done to receive such unusual favor, but if you wish to emulate my past actions in pursuit of the same, I would suggest earnestly taking up DM/GM/Storytelling for at least 20 years, buying and hording hundreds of polyhedrons and hardcover RPG books and supplements to tithe to your local hobby shrine over which the Dice Lords cast their dominion.

Good luck to ye.

Please assume the above was enunciated in the ringing syllables booming from the throat of the one and only Dr. Byron Orpheus