Warband is by far the best. You shouldn't of purchased the original game, as Warband is just that plus some juicy extras. Fire and Sword is a bit weird; in someways it is better to Warband, in some ways it is inferior.
I really have to say: stick with Warband. It's one of those games that sucks you in and keeps you playing for a *long* time. I went into it with the intent of becoming King of Calradia. I'll let you know how that works out in about 10 years once I'm finished.
Oh, and the multiplayer is amazing. It's just awesome to get together with some friends and joust each other or run down an army of enemy footsoldiers.
I wouldn't bother with the original at all myself, because Warband is just the original with a bunch of extra stuff that makes it better (and it has a short beginner's quest to introduce new players too). After you've got a hang of things, try With Fire and Sword too. I prefer Warband myself, but WFAS is certainly worth playing.
I'll play along with everyone else and say that Warband is the best, but there are some absolutely jaw dropping mods for the original game - total conversions to Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Wheel of Time, A Song of Ice and Fire, etc. - that I don't believe are available for Warband. Not to say that Warband doesn't have some great mods of its own, of course.
I'm currently playing "With Fire and Sword" and I am enjoying it, the guns are annoying but I still enjoy taking over everywhere. Which I already did, ALL HAIL ME!
Basically, Warlord is probably the best starting one. With Fire and Sword is pretty different though. Both take mods very well, but Warlord has so many more, which is what makes it better.
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