Why are you hetero or homosexual?...

[icame]

Because I do not find Males sexually attractive, whereas I do find girls attractive. It's really quite simple.

 

[onewheeled]

I'm heterosexual because boobs.

That's pretty much it. Because boobs.

 

[the_bearpelt]

Okay, as far as not having a relationship by the age of sixteen, don't worry, you're not alone. Several of my friends and I didn't have relationships all through-out highschool. I only started dating during my first semester of college. And the first time I had sex was when I was nineteen. There's absolutely no rush and it's worth the wait. If you try to force a relationship before you've found a good one, you won't enjoy it.

As far as the question of why stick with one gender, for me, it's largely because I honestly have no attraction towards women (my own gender). I've always really been that way.

Here's some food for thought, though. Did you know that almost everyone goes through a period called Latent Homosexuality? It usually occurs right after you hit puberty, I believe. It's a period where you become unsure if you're heterosexual or homosexual. For me, I kept wondering if noticing another woman's breasts or butt meant I was homosexual. Eventually, I realized that I wasn't looking because I was attracted by it, but that it was more of a comparison thing for me, comparing my own figure with another woman's, which is very normal. For my boyfriend, the way he dealt with it was, at age sixteen, he went to a gay club, where the first floor was a dancing area for people ages sixteen and up, and the second floor was a bar (which he obviously wasn't allowed into). He danced alongside and chatted with gay men and realized he wasn't attracted to any of them and it was apparently obvious to them that he wasn't gay, so they asked him what he was doing there very politely. He said it was a fun experience, though.

 

[zelda2fanboy]

I brought up the priesthood because it was an example of a conservative religious front that has taken the position away from the sexuality = behavior standard held by conservative churches. I wasn't intending on referring to the recent controversies regarding the pedophilia offenses and the cover-up. Whether or not they are the pointless bullshit society attaches to sex, they have a lot of influence regarding large bodies of people, and we New Atheists are not yet pursuasive in convincing the masses to excercise a a bit of judgement when their chosen leaders of faith feed them a line. Hence, I figure their opinion, no matter how absurd, needs to be acknowledged before it is then rejected.

I wasn't speaking from the perspective of how things necessarily are, but how they should be. The problem is in accounting for religious stuff that may influence people, it's automatically lent an air of credibility, which it shouldn't have. There really aren't that many Catholics and of Catholics, there really aren't that many priests, and of those priests, there might be an even smaller number of people who may or may not have been considered gay had they not entered into the church. I'd also bet that most people who attend church (anywhere) don't necessarily take everything to heart and let it influence their lives. In high school geography, we were shown an interesting video about the declining birth rate in Italy, where the most devout Catholics in the world had pretty much stopped following what the church had to say about birth control out of simple practicality.

But anyways, I have a certain amount of respect for Catholicism over other denominations of Christianity. Being the originator of the faith, they can alter the word of God (like in that movie Dogma), unlike many protestant denominations which proclaim some literal or more correct interpretations of crazy. So, it's not impossible that the thought police for priests, however unlikely, could change. But more likely a prospective priest would just say that he didn't have impure thoughts about or contact with other men. How would they know?

 

[n00beffect]

What the hell is wrong with you people?! And by people I mean the Posters of the most recent threads about bloody sexuality.

Listen, kid, if I have to follow your scenario, which is: in a relationship with someone, meet someone else, likey. Then the answer to this startling conundrum is that my sexuallity leans towards the sex which I happen to have begun liking. It's that bloody simple! If I am in a relationship with a girl and I meet some guy who I find sexually attractive, then obviously I am gay/bi. Your sexuallity is not something you can alter, or control in any way, no matter how much you try. It's a genetic predisposition, and no matter how much you try to be gay, or hetero, or bi, fact is you remain whatever it is that you are.

And yes, you probably are the only 16 year old who hasn't had a relationship yet, because you don't understand horse bollocks about how sex or love works. If, for instance, you fall inlove with some guy while you're in a relationship with a girl, and you try to deny it to yourself, than you're just being stupid (same applies to vice-versa).

And what amazes me the most is that you seem to, or at least claim to, understand that sexuallity is incontrolable, and yet you persist on asking your question, which is utterly meaningless, since you already have the bloody answer (that sexuallity is incontrolable). So, excuse me in saying, sir, but I believe you're just being stubborn and pigheaded, and somewhat trollful.

 

[GraveeKing]

-snip-

You're exactly the kind of guy, I will never deny - ARE heterosexual, I appreicate that and it's as fair as someone being any sexuality.
But nearly every guy I see who DO turn bi-curious or bisexual find that they never tried before because they think it'd make them look bad, I didn't mean to insult you - I was just pointing out from my own personal experience.

And for the people getting off-topic, the guy is trying to say, why is it EVEN IF WE ARE PROGRAMMED (or not depending on your view) do we only focus on one gender and yet there are still plenty of bisexuals out there?

THANK. YOU.

And no problem my good sir, I was worried that saying 'WE NEED MORE BISEXUALS' was going to inspire hate, but I agree! People DO need to be a bit more curious. It's not us being selfish as some would say and go 'YOU JUST WANT MORE COCK FAGS' it's just us saying, there could be more love in the world if people would actually try for once rather than being all egoistic.
EDIT - and of course this ALSO includes homosexuals trying out woman or a woman trying out a woman.

 

[poppabaggins]

Part 1: Nature
Part 2: Nurture

ANSWER TO EVERY QUESTION ABOUT LIFE

You're exactly the kind of guy, I will never deny - ARE heterosexual, I appreicate that and it's as fair as someone being any sexuality.
But nearly every guy I see who DO turn bi-curious or bisexual find that they never tried before because they think it'd make them look bad, I didn't mean to insult you - I was just pointing out from my own personal experience.

To that, I respond with this: http://www.nytimes.com/2005/07/05/health/05sex.html

Very few men are actually bisexual.

 

[Thaa'ir]

I will ignore the petty anger and such that seems to spring up on these forums at the slightest provocation.

I am gay. Why am I gay? Biology. But that's now what you're asking. So the truth is, I love masculinity. It's what turns me on. Guys with great bodies and muscles and short hair, etc., are what I am attracted to. I am not attracted to feminine traits and I don't show interest in feminine gay guys.

But then comes the surprise: my boyfriend is definitely not the most masculine guy out there. But I love him for who he is, though he is outside the boundaries of what I would have considered my type before I met him. Does this mean I would date a girl? No. But it shows that not everything is black and white.

Also, all of my straight friends tell me that if they were gay, I'd be their first choice of boyfriend. So if me and my boyfriend break up, I just need to invent some dark device to change them...(kidding).

Haha...thank you. That's one of the few straight-forward answers I've received.

Oh, no problem. I thought your intent with the question was kind of plain to see.

 

[badgersprite]

Because I am?

If I did meet someone of the opposite gender who I felt attracted to or really wanted to be with, I wouldn't say no or deny those feelings, for the same reason I don't deny the fact I'm attracted to women sexually and romantically, but I just don't have any interest in men that way, and it seems highly unlikely that I ever will.

 

[TheSolemnHypnotic]

Edit V: I KNOW FOR MOST PEOPLE SEXUALITY IS NOT A CHOICE.

Then WHY are you even asking? This is a stupid question, I hope in retrospect you can appreciate that.

I just figured since most isn't all there could be something I haven't heard before. :/

My apologies. I should remember the old axiom about how the only stupid question is the one not asked. But might I ask a question of you? What do you hope to learn from this?

i'm just very gay, only girls make me feel that way. if i would feel it for a guy i would go for it but that has never happened and i think there is a very good chance it never will.

I hope you won't find it offensive when I say this, but whenever I meet a pretty, intelligent and kind lesbian girl I always think it's kind of a shame. Hope you won't hate me too much for that.

I'm trying to have a better understanding of sexuality. Including my own.

 

[TheSolemnHypnotic]

Please read.
*snip*

*snip*

Thank you so much. I'm glad that you posted something other than "because I am". Your response was thoughtful and I appreciate the scenarios you posted at the end. It's a bit of a combination of both I must say. Thank you for your time.

 

[TheSolemnHypnotic]

Edit IV: Is there a way to turn the anger off in here?

Nope, it's the internet. People are going to whine and ***** no matter what. You just have to accept it, sadly. =/

Anyways, OT:
*snip*.

Thank you for your response. Not to many people have posted that they have seriously considered that. Nice to see that at least you pondered beyond what you're used to.

 

[TheSolemnHypnotic]

What you seem to be describing in your OP is a Platonic/Hands-Off Relationship, and what you're asking about is a Romantic/Sexual Relationship. The two can be mutually exclusive. I have a Platonic/Hands-Off Relationship with almost everybody I know, but I've never had a Romantic/Sexual Relationship in my life. You describe in your post meeting a person who is 10^8 times "better" than your Romantic/Sexual partner, but is the opposite gender that you are attracted to. In those situations, you just become Platonic/Hands-Off friends with that person. For instance, I, a male, pursue Romantic/Sexual Relationships with women and only women. But I have considerably more Platonic/Hands-Off friends that are male than I have that are female, because males are more likely to share my interests and sense of humor (which can get misogynistic/racist/scatological/loldeadbabies at times all the time). So, yes, I'm usually happier around males than with females, but no part of me wants to do sex with them. It's all about the difference between Platonic/Hands-Off Relationships vs. Romantic/Sexual Relationships.

Thank you. I see your point. It's kinda simple...in a complex way.

 

[TheSolemnHypnotic]

I believe homosexuality or heterosexuality is on a spectrum.

Super gay - gay - bisexual - straight - super straight

I believe it's influenced only slightly by environment. I believe it's mostly influenced by DNA, and brain development. I haven't read much into theories behind it. I just know that homosexuality isn't a new thing to society, a lot of classical history is based around homosexuality, and it has lots of mentions in pre-history. It also isn't isolated to our species. My friend has a male dog that will only shag other males. So I guess that's ample proof that homosexuality exists outside of humanity.

I was having the same conversation with one of my homosexual friends about this very topic. And he says that he WANTS to find women attractive, because he wants to have a family. But he just... doesn't. He's capable of having sex with them for a child, but no recreational sex. He says that he just doesn't find any part of a woman appealing. He doesn't like their looks, he doesn't like their personalities, he doesn't like the fact that they have vagina's. He just finds everything a man has all the more appealing. So we've come to the conclusion that he is actually incapable of finding a woman sexually attractive. But he still can, and wants to procreate. With this, we can deduce that he in fact cannot chose to be gay, he just is.

It's nice to see that people are openly discussing this as opposed to just taking everything as is without a second thought. And I'm sure your friend appreciates your willingness to talk about it.

 

[TheSolemnHypnotic]

There is way too much to this topic to read through it all. But I like the question.

I identify 100% as homosexual, however technically I'm bisexual.

Spoiler: Off topic tangent

I could go on to argue the notion that everyone is bisexual because humans are not literally attracted to gender. There are characteristics of the genders that people find attractive, and you'll often find people being attracted to traps of the other gender.

I find women attractive, I can get aroused until orgasm to women in porn, however what I can't/wont do is date women. It's more the normalcy's off their personality, habits, and other factors that just turns me off completely. In porn, I don't deal with any of that.

So, that is why I identify as homosexual, not because I don't find women physically attractive, but because I don't find them mentally attractive

This makes so much sense, my mind is blown.

 

[TheSolemnHypnotic]

There's just love. Who we give it to does not really matter.

That was beautiful :')

 

[TheSolemnHypnotic]

Wow my friend, I'm sorry to see such a backlash for your thread.

Haha, it's okay. Therapy should fix it. lol

 

[TheSolemnHypnotic]

I'm only attracted to fictional species, and generally both genders of them.

I think I'm what is generally known as "Fucking weird"

All of my romantic interest are anime/video game characters. I don't think it's weird...unless you're into ponies. XD

 

[Outright Villainy]

I think the fact that you've had to post 6 edits kinda shows how poorly worded/thought out the Op is. There is no 'why' to biological attraction. It just is.