Why do people hate Ewoks?

[EmperorSubcutaneous]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Star_Wars_Episode_VI:_Return_of_the_Jedi#Reception

Revenge of the Sith has a higher score than Return of the Jedi? Really? I just...wow.

Jedi had the chainmail bikini. That alone should be enough to boost it higher than Sith.

If given the choice between Ewoks and "NOOOOOOOOOO!" I'd take Ewoks any day...

 

[Orks da best]

Pretty sure the imperial forces would have wiped out the Ewoks long ago anyway, particularly during the building of the base. Its satisfying to know that the Ewoks were wiped out shortly after Return of the Jedi though: http://www.theforce.net/swtc/holocaust.html

apparently the initial hostility the ewoks had to the rebels was due to the stormtroopers hunting down and slaughtering ewoks.. the battle of endor was the vietnam of starwars. the stormtoorpers may of had superior technology but they didnt know the terrain, their armour made them stick out like a sore thumb. when the troopers can bring their superior firepower to bare they do slaughter them, but that forest would be a ***** to fight in at the best of times let alone facing mini wookies. i do wonder how many stormtroopers ended up being the main meal at the celebration BBQ after the battle

that does make some sense, skill and knowelagde do win battles, rather then superior firepower and numbers, the ewoks did use the envrioment to their advantage, being very disruptive, but out in open, the ewoks got blow to little bear bits.

 

[Atmos Duality]

From a narrative perspective: The Ewoks were considered a marginal pest at best by the Empire and probably didn't count on the rebels actively working with them. I can actually see a good plot in an indigenous tribe wanting to help remove an entity that has setup shop on their homeworld.

Of course, that's where George Lucas stepped in and went "Fuck it. We can sell more toys if we make them cute teddy bears."

The intervening sequences of the space battle and Luke fit the setting and tone of the other movies perfectly; they look like they belong. But the scenes where AT-STs and men wearing space-age body armor are getting hilariously picked off by sticks and stones (the speeder-traps actually look like something you would do in that environment, to be fair) breaks the mood.

Fortunately, I don't hate those scenes simply because Harrison Ford is just that damn good in them.

 

[Drake666]

I think Barney in How I Met Your Mother said it better:

It's because of our age when we first saw Return of the Jedi. I was pretty damn young, so the Ewoks were cool to me. Those of you who were older than 13-14 probably though that the Ewoks were for kiddies

However, I didn't find the scene on youtube...

 

[Thaluikhain]

(the speeder-traps actually look like something you would do in that environment, to be fair)

If you've got time to prepare, and know that the speeder will be travelling that way at that height. If they'd been flying 100 foot up to avoid things being thrown at them, or slow so they can hit what they are shooting at, it wouldn't have worked.

To say nothing of building those giant log releasing weapons right next to the enemy base.

Now, if they'd been fighting the empire for a long time, and had captured some Imperial weapons along the way...

 

[Toaster Hunter]

it just seems implausible that a force that has the technology to blow up planets can be taken down by three foot tall teddy bears with rock. The original idea was to have wookies, but that fell through because it would be too expensive.

 

[Atmos Duality]

If you've got time to prepare, and know that the speeder will be travelling that way at that height. If they'd been flying 100 foot up to avoid things being thrown at them, or slow so they can hit what they are shooting at, it wouldn't have worked.

It's hard to strafe targets when you're above the canopy of a dense forest. Perhaps flying above the groundline but under the canopy would work. Based on my own experiences with simulations (helicopters, etc) it's much easier to strafe in 2 dimensions than 3.

I never understood how some speeders can fly anywhere they want (swoop bikes, virtually everything on Coruscant), but others are just stuck to hovering just above the ground (Luke's speeder on Tatooine, the empire's swoop bikes).

Then again, I question why they were using speeders in such a hazardous environment to begin with. One could fly right into a tree stump or low hill just by cutting through the foliage, and that's purely accidental.

Perhaps everyone in the Imperial military had just been issued their Idiot Balls that day.
If I had a black ops stations designed to explicitly protect the MOST IMPORTANT AND POWERFUL ASSET IN THE EMPIRE, I might garrison a few more hundred men, and include some automated security. At least.

Though, it's not like it takes a long time to setup those traps. You just need two people (or...ewoks) and some rope. I've set up hammocks-baselines and camping tackle in trees in under a minute before (with help, but still); it's not that hard.

To say nothing of building those giant log releasing weapons right next to the enemy base.

Now, if they'd been fighting the empire for a long time, and had captured some Imperial weapons along the way...

That, I found utterly implausible. Each one of those logs would weigh over 200lbs. You're asking me to believe a bunch of teddy bears could quickly, and quietly roll those up a hill, stack them, and not have ANYONE notice?

 

[ThaBenMan]

I'm fine with the Ewoks, and I love RotJ (I even like it better than Empire - gasp!) I figure part of it was the arrogance of the Empire - they saw the Ewoks as just utterly beneath their concern and couldn't possibly be a threat.

My sister is mad that Ewok isn't a player race in The Old Republic -____-

 

[agent_orange420]

Its my favorite one. apparently the (original) final song, where the ewoks are all dancing about, some of the lyrics of the song in swedish mean "it smells of fish in here." Along with finding out the co-pilot of the Millenium falcon (Nein Numb) was saying some lolage things in his native kenyan, makes me like it all the more. its not meant to be anything other than a concluding laugh, and all the stapling Hayden Christensen in as a force ghost, blinking eyes on the ewoks, beaks on the sarlacc, just makes me go pffffffffffffffffffff. It might be the property of george Lucas, but he didnt direct it, so he should stop ballsing about with it.

Nerd-rant over

 

[Thaluikhain]

It's hard to strafe targets when you're above the canopy of a dense forest. Perhaps flying above the groundline but under the canopy would work. Based on my own experiences with simulations (helicopters, etc) it's much easier to strafe in 2 dimensions than 3.

I never understood how some speeders can fly anywhere they want (swoop bikes, virtually everything on Coruscant), but others are just stuck to hovering just above the ground (Luke's speeder on Tatooine, the empire's swoop bikes).

Then again, I question why they were using speeders in such a hazardous environment to begin with. One could fly right into a tree stump or low hill just by cutting through the foliage, and that's purely accidental.

That's what I meant. The canopy is way, way up in the air, the obstructions don't seem to be more than a few metres off the ground.

Though, if they were fighting enemies armed with blasters, they'd want to stay low to hide behind the terrain, I guess.

Perhaps everyone in the Imperial military had just been issued their Idiot Balls that day.
If I had a black ops stations designed to explicitly protect the MOST IMPORTANT AND POWERFUL ASSET IN THE EMPIRE, I might garrison a few more hundred men, and include some automated security. At least.

There was an entire legion of the Emperor's best troops, along with those walker thingies. If the plot is against you, doesn't matter how many men you have.

 

[Vrex360]

I don't like them because they were a really, really transperantly obvious attempt to market to children and more importantly, make toys. All Ewoks were, essentially, were teddy bears with sticks and rocks, designed to be as 'cute' as possible to attract kiddie audiences into buying the subsequent horde of plush Ewoks that came afterwards (as well as the dreadful movies centered solely on Ewoks that came later).
The final battle of Endor could have been done without Ewoks, in fact it makes the final battle all the more stupid when the Empire force gets overwhelmed by them. The final battle of a huge galaxy spanning civil war ends at the hands of a bunch of bloody teddy bears. That's just stupid.

That's the problem I have here, a blatant attempt to market toys to children rose up in the movie and it was seemingly decided that it was more important then actually making a non cheesy way to end the saga.
In the movie Spaceballs, the parody of Yoda (Yogurt) makes a reference to the fact that Merchendising is where the real money from the movie is made, and nowhere is that more apparent in the brain dead decision that spawned the Ewoks (and subsequently Jar Jar Binks).
This love of merchendising over story and ridiculously childish plot devices already started to turn me off Star Wars.
Then the prequel trilogy started...

 

[Squilookle]

I've never understood it either- but then again it must be because I'm the only one in the world that has the version of the film where the Ewoks were only a distraction at best, had primitive traps that enjoyed roughly the same level of surprise on their technologically superior enemies that Viet Cong booby traps did on their technologically superior enemies, and then once surprise was lost, started getting absolutely slaughtered by their technologically superior enemies. It's a funny old version where Chewy gets hold of an ATST and that saves the day more than anything the Ewoks ever did.

I really should track down this version of RotJ everyone keeps talking about where the Ewoks kill all the stormtroopers themselves and blow up the generator with a slingshot.

because that's what they make it sound like

My sister is mad that Ewok isn't a player race in The Old Republic -____-

It is in Battlefront 2 though- buy her that!

 

[Atmos Duality]

There was an entire legion of the Emperor's best troops, along with those walker thingies. If the plot is against you, doesn't matter how many men you have.

I suppose just about any story looks silly when you apply common sense/logic to it. Sometimes the trip itself is more important than the story (Avatar thrives on this, despite the plot being overdone horseshit).

Though here it's even a bit self-contradictory: the rebel fleet fell right into an imperial trap. So the empire was obviously prepared.
But then they lose the ground war to a numerically inferior, under-equipped force (a shuttle of maybe 20-30 soldiers vs an entire legion with Armor)...because of teddy bears.

 

[Vault Citizen]

They annoy me. It has always bothered me that a backwards race (in terms of technology I'm not calling them stupid) manage to beat the finest legion of the Empire with nothing but sticks, rocks and ropes.

As for the movies my favourite of the original trilogy has always been the empire strikes back, to me it just has the most out of the three that makes Star Wars great.

I don't think there is anything wrong with the third movie (apart from the Ewoks) I just happen to like the other two better.

With the age thing I think I was 7 when I first saw the movie, didn't love the ewoks didn't hate them either, they were just their.

Can't remember when they started to annoy me, could have been as young as 11 or as old as 16.

 

[Knusper]

Well not only do they destroy a "Legion of the best troops" as said, but only one of them dies.I'm not saying I'm only happy when things are dying in films, but it was one of the first times the series just used cuteness and teddy bears swinging on ropes to enertain the audience, rather than offer something with emotions.

 

[ElPatron]

"Ok people we have a cloning technique that lets us create millions of perfect soldiers"

You do know that clones were rare in the original triology, right?

Most stormtroopers were conscripted, not perfect super-soldier clones. I'm not a big fan of Star Wars but I know that...

 

[Abedeus]

"Ok people we have a cloning technique that lets us create millions of perfect soldiers"

You do know that clones were rare in the original triology, right?

Most stormtroopers were conscripted, not perfect super-soldier clones. I'm not a big fan of Star Wars but I know that...

Humans in real life don't have ANY human cloning technology, or even lasers/blasters/siege machines like those in Star Wars universe.

And I bet that few soldiers from any army would be able to outright slaughter all of those dumb bears. I mean hell, how hard it is to use a flamethrower in a JUNGLE, baby.


...that reference came out all wrong.

I'm fine with the Ewoks, and I love RotJ (I even like it better than Empire - gasp!) I figure part of it was the arrogance of the Empire - they saw the Ewoks as just utterly beneath their concern and couldn't possibly be a threat.

My sister is mad that Ewok isn't a player race in The Old Republic -____-

Nobody who has access to power armors, jetpacks, hyper-space compatible spaceships and lasers would consider devolved bear-men a threat. They didn't even discover gunpower yet. That's like what, 15th century Europe or so. Don't tell me a bunch of idiot peasants from 15th century could massacre a 21st century army. It happened already in XIX/XX centuries, when some natives fought against a modern army. 5000 people with spears and bows versus 50 guys with machine guns. 3000 dead, and nobody even injured from the other side.

 

[Jarlaxl]

I've never understood it either- but then again it must be because I'm the only one in the world that has the version of the film where the Ewoks were only a distraction at best, had primitive traps that enjoyed roughly the same level of surprise on their technologically superior enemies that Viet Cong booby traps did on their technologically superior enemies, and then once surprise was lost, started getting absolutely slaughtered by their technologically superior enemies. It's a funny old version where Chewy gets hold of an ATST and that saves the day more than anything the Ewoks ever did.

I really should track down this version of RotJ everyone keeps talking about where the Ewoks kill all the stormtroopers themselves and blow up the generator with a slingshot.

because that's what they make it sound like

My sister is mad that Ewok isn't a player race in The Old Republic -____-

It is in Battlefront 2 though- buy her that!

I suppose that this has always been my perspective.

Ewoks also drill the point home about the Rebels being a collection of diverse people, races, and ideas fighting against an oppressive, homogeneous, ruthlessly bureaucratic Imperial army. True, they're small, but they, like everyone else associated with the Rebels, have something to bring to the fight. That always stuck out to me, and I always liked that about them.

I'm willing to let Lucas make boatloads of money off of his creation. The Ewoks never really offended me, though, so maybe that's why.

Edit: Would you have liked the confrontation more if, instead of Ewoks, there were, suppose, some cell of guerrilla fighter humans/humanoids, armed just as much as the Rebel forces, there for some independent organization (let's say a trade federation that was kicked off the planet by Imperials and thus denied a lucrative raw resources harvesting operation)? Or something along those lines?

 

[Thaluikhain]

There was an entire legion of the Emperor's best troops, along with those walker thingies. If the plot is against you, doesn't matter how many men you have.

I suppose just about any story looks silly when you apply common sense/logic to it. Sometimes the trip itself is more important than the story (Avatar thrives on this, despite the plot being overdone horseshit).

Not really...a lot of movies require a dubious grasp of logic to work, but it's hardly a requirement. The standard tends to be set fairly low on regards to this, though.

 

[evilneko]

Begin HeadScratcher/ItJustBugsMe:
You know what gets me? We don't even see most of the fighting. A Roman legion was 5000-some odd men. Now, we don't know what size an Imperial legion is, but it's obviously fairly large given the emphasis the Emperor gave it.

So where are the rest of them?

We see maybe a handful of stormtroopers get killed, a few vehicles destroyed, and one group of a couple dozen or so captured.

What happened to the rest? Get lost in the woods? Or is an Imperial legion much smaller than a Roman one, and the Emperor was only emphasizing it because the size of a legion is still several times larger than the rebel force that could fit in the shuttle?

Begin FanWank:
In any case, as has been pointed out, the Ewoks didn't do it all alone. They were a diversionary force that gained a few lucky victories, some fairly believable, some not so much.

A plausible hypothesis is using them to funnel Imperials into killzones set up by the Rebel commandos that accompanied the main characters. Based on what we actually see of the battle, the Imperials were caught completely off-guard and their response and was disorganized to say the least. Their combat methodology was also piss-poor with no thought given to the environment. By contrast, the Ewoks were highly organized and well-prepared. The rebel commandos were also much better prepared for forest combat (lolcamouflage). In this situation it's easy to imagine commandos ambushing and slaughtering whole groups of stormtroopers.

But it still all hinges on how many troops the Empire had. No matter how badass a particular group of soldiers may be, no matter how many factors are in their favor, eventually they'll be overwhelmed by sheer weight of numbers. Woookieepedia gives the standard passenger capacity of a shuttle at 20. Since Han and Chewie were piloting, that leaves 18 seats for commandos. So 18 commandos against... how many stormtroopers?

Wookieepedia doesn't have a concrete answer. Naturally, since there isn't a canon source for it. It gives a range of 8000-15000.

So where the hell were they?