Why Movies Suck Now Part Two: The Reality

[webchameleon]

So, to recap, the top reasons movies suck are because:

1) We see the brand name of products in films.

2) Movie popularity is based on the money earned during the weekend, which is bad because it means movies that open during the week and fail to sell into the weekend aren't popular in the eyes of movie studios. What twisted thinking! (BTW, movie studios aren't stupid when it comes to the bottom line. They make the adjustments necessary in their analysis to compare films that open at any time during the week)

3) People are stupid (not selective enough).

4) "Movie Geeks are ELITIST, SPOILED BRATS" (too picky). Help us change our ways, oh Wise One!

5) Theaters are high-priced, sticky, and staffed with obnoxious people because movie studios are allowed to negotiate which of THEIR films get screened. CAPITALIST PIGS! "THERE OUGHT TO BE A LAAAAAAW!!!"

6) Movie studios only write good films for young white men.

7) Movies have always sucked:
--Early 20th: No smell-o-vision
--Early 20th: RACISM!!!!
--50's: Conservatives
--60's: No movies people liked
--70's: Exploitation films
--80's: Capitalism
--90's: "You get the idea" (...you're a douche?)


Why should anyone take you seriously, "MovieBob"? There is nothing unique about your half-baked Liberal whining and finger-poking. None of your claims/analyses can be substantiated because they're all just vague accusations of 'wrong-thinking' against large groups of people. You have said nothing in this article to convince me that you know anything about film financing or marketing. As far as I'm concerned. your article is just the angry, snobbish musings of a man who thinks everyone is a fool but him.

 

[Worgen]

Dubbed movies? I don't think so. If you're too lazy to read subtitles, you don't deserve to watch the movie. Besides, have you heard a dubbed movie before? The English speaking voice actors pout about as much emotion into it as a cardboard box, and the only exception I've seen is Afro Samurai, and that's because they had Samuel L. Jackson and Ron Perlman acting in it.

what about if your too drunk to read subtitles?

 

[008Zulu_v1legacy]

Who is Tyler Perry you ask? Well, he is a well known actor/comedian. Personally, I don't think he is funny at all, but that's just me. He's the main character on the show Tyler Perry's House of Payne; obviously since his name is in the title.

Ah, so it's just not a clever name?
(not funny, Payne/Pain)

 

[Dhatz]

to MovieBob:
I'm submitting definition of Intellectoxin to Urbandictionary where I quote your description in the example section of definition as follows:

[quotation from MobieBob's article published on the Escapist 23 July 2010 6:00 pm:

If you were to ask me what the three most intellectually-toxic movie franchises are right now, you'd be unsurprised to learn my answers were Twilight, Sex & The City and Tyler Perry. You know what they all have in common? They exist because mainstream Hollywood did a piss-poor job of paying proper attention to niche audiences - niche in Hollywood meaning any audience that is not white, male and aged 15-35.]

 

[Korten12]

What are your opinions on My Big Fat Greek Wedding, anyway?

Anyway, thanks for opening my eyes to the theater situation!

I know this answer isn't coming from the person you want it to, but I loved the movie. found it quite funny.

 

[maxben]

Well, we could deal with #4 by phasing out theathers, and quick question. Do you include yourself under those elitist snobs, or is it everyone but you? Because if you don't, well, that sounds pretty egotistical to me. Personally, I like intelligent movies, but I also like unintelligent ones. The Transformers films are the Painkiller or Saints Row 2 of movies. They aren't intelligent, they're fun. I don't go to see them to see a good plot, I go for giant robot fights that melt ILM computers.

Notice his use of "we" for both the idiots and the elitists.
Essentially, I think, we all have a little bit of that in us and the first comes out when we are in a large group and the second when we are in a small group or by ourselves.

 

[mexicola]

Man, I should probably pay attention to some element of our culture that isn't video games at some point. Who the hell is Tyler Perry? I honstly don't ever remember hearing that name before.

You and me both. I googled the name, read about him and I still have no idea who he is.

 

[ProfessorLayton]

Oh right... Is it Naruto I was thinking of then? I don't know much beyond Dragon Ball Z to be perfectly honest.

But anyway with dubbing if it's brought to a wider audience it can be enjoyed by more people. If it becomes a box office success studios would be more willing to back the writers and directors of what would normally be considered risky films. I'm a pretty big fan of Asian movies, Old Boy being one of my favourites. I wouldn't watch it dubbed ever because it would ruin it for me personally but if it brought it to a wider audience then we'd see more films like that being made. By being elitist about it all you'd doing is making it harder for the kind of movies you like to see made. Also for a good few people movies with a lot of action or a complicated plot can be made harder to follow if they can't take they're eyes off the subtitles.

Naruto was censored beyond belief so it could get played on TV. Maybe it's part elitist snob and part hipster (same thing, right? lolol) but I kind of like saying that I enjoy movies that people have never heard of... and there are just some things that mainstream audiences aren't ready for, and the people like myself who like their action and horror with a little bit of intellectual backing shouldn't have to watch our films be cut down to reach a wider audience.

 

[Dectilon]

I do think the movie snobs tried to say "You gotta see this!" but the person they said it to responded with "Lol! (unironically said out loud) I'm gonna watch Transformers 2, because robots with balls is funy!"

That'd make anyone feel disillusioned

I don't think people worry enough about this. From what I've heard it's getting harder and harder to secure funding to make independent movies, at least in the US.

"I would personally prefer it if going to see a movie alone wasn't such an unpleasant experience, in that you get alot of looks and the like from the other movie goers, but anywho..."

You don't have to dress yourself up as a storm trooper for EVERY movie you go to.

 

[MelasZepheos_v1legacy]

Surprised he forgot to mention some of the other staples of Hollywood in the 'Golden Age'

Mass production.

Churning out half a dozen films a month while working your actors to death with a pittance for a wage and basically firing anyone who was involved with a box office flop. (This is only partially an exaggeration)

If you really went back and watched every film from the Golden Age you'd realise that they probably had more shit than we do nowadays, it's just that our shit is marketed whether it's brilliant or whether it's Twilight, so we're more aware of it. And of course nostalgia changes all. We all remember Manos Hands of Fate as one of the worst movies ever made but in thirty years no one will remember Manos and everyone will (if sanity is restored) remember Twilight as being the worst movie ever made. I'm sure back when Manos was released there was a film from the thirties that was remembered as being awful.

Did your grandparents ever talk to you about movies? Mine did, and my grandfather was a film buff (he had a collection spanning nearly all of the big movies, as well as several independent art films and smaller budget productions for nearly sixty years of cinema) and he once told me that Star Wars was the film that he explicitly remembered changed everything for the better, and he didn't even like Star Wars. But basically he said that as far as he could see when he lived through it everything was getting boring and mish-mash and it looked like cinema was going under when suddenly Star Wars came along and films started being fun again.

And I'm sure when we're all grandparents we'll be saying 'I know you think it's bad now, but I remember 2010, when Iron Man 2 came out, and believe me kiddo, things have gotten better since.'

Nostalgia is the only reason people ever think anything is getting worse.

 

[Deacon Cole]

I think the main reason is #6 with the addition that when you're younger, you're

a) much easier to please and

2) tend to associate things with certain times in our lives. In other words, nostalgia.

For instance, I used to really like Candlebox because around that time, I had finally moved out of my parents house. I was a young man in the world. Lately, I don't listen to Candlebox all that much anymore. They are probably alright. I just don't care, really. When I hear the riff for "You" I'm not necessarily listening to the music so much as remembering what it was like to be in my twenties again.

So it is with movies. Lots of high school and collage aged kids go to the movies on dates. Now, how many thought Schindler's List was a great movie and not because of what was up on the screen, if you follow me?

Fact is, most things are shit. The good ones tend to be remembered. A similar argument is made about the plays of ancient Greece. They all seem decent because only the good ones survived.

But that nostalgia thing is a monster. I'm at an age now where I've sat and watched new generations come of age and start complaining how things are not as good as when they were young. Which the generation before them did, and the one before them did, and the one before them did, and mine did, and my parents' did, etc ad infinitum.

I guess it's just part of becoming an adult that you become harder to please and tend to look back fondly on your own past. Fact is, you thought everything was great when you were young because you were young and didn't know any better. I saw Howard the Duck in the theater and I loved it. Kids are stupid that way. Then you grow up and you go see, say, the Dungeons & Dragons movie and wonder why everything is shitty now, not like when you were a kid. The Dungeons & Dragons cartoon series was aces, you think. And then you get the DVD boxed set of the series and realize what an idiot you have always been.

I picked up the first season of the Muppet Show on DVD. I will not be getting the subsequent seasons. That show was fucking horrible. What the hell was I thinking watching that shit?

 

[Jacques 2]

Movie Theaters, had it coming. (Insanely) overpriced food, barring people from openly bringing food from other places into the theater, ticket prices (given there is a reason for this) and the damned stupid recycle your 3D glasses so we can sell them back to you next time. I like the rest of the article, but theaters get no sympathy from me, though I'm probably biased because they attempted to card me when I tried to get tickets for up, claiming I needed physical state marked proof that I was over 18 to buy tickets for a G movie, that and well, the prices.

The food is overpriced because we wouldn't be able to stay open if it wasn't in most cases we get about one or two euro per ticket. So even in a best case scenario in a six screen theatre like the one I work in a good day is about 2000 customers. 4000 euro (compared to weekdays when we'd usually draw in about 200-300 so 400 to 600 euro). Then the fact that the theaters are pretty much dead all week from September to May except for holidays and huge releases. We'd be lucky to break even if we charged regular store prices for the concessions. Besides we actually can't stop people bringing in food.

5 dollars for a small popcorn is beyond reasonable, and over here in the states the concessions are almost unused because of this. Lower prices will probably draw in more sales, but hell, the popcorn butter is cheap carcinogen filled crap. I see the theater packed day in and day out, and then hear about how badly they're doing on the news.

 

[Redd the Sock]

Always interesting.

Point 1 explains a lot, such as why commercials for a movie seem to totaly stop almost immediatly after release, but why any overall crappy movie can get a sequal if it was number 1 for one week.

Point 2 is a sad truth. I consider it a personal shame that Spirited Away had a lower domestic thetrical take than House of the Dead. We just won't try anything new or outside the box.

Point 3 can't be emphisized enough. People complain about so much reality TV, but it stays on because it's audience likes it while we'll take any inperfection in a show and complain about it until it's off the air. Film is no different. Why try another Watchment if it'll just be nitpicked apart?

Point 4 can't be blamed on the movie, but yeah, the theatre experience isn't what it used to be. Even if I ignore the ushers ignoring the girl behind me kicking my seat because they're too busy checking for outside food, I've been at two movies this year where the projector broke during the film, one time 3 times.

Point 5 is much like point two. They meet to appeal to the lowest common denominator and that is us.

Point 6 is another reality we should think about. While I think Sturgen's law is something to try and prove wrong, yeah, a lot of crap is out there. ?With older films we only know the good because that's all most people want to try and save. We forget the MST3K films were real moies that no doubt bombed at the box office. Nowadays, well, above people are raving about Terminator 2, but the 90s also gave us Wing Commander, Independance Day, Street Fighter, and other bombs. Lose the idealism, it never existed.

 

[MB202]

Those are all good reasons, especially the final one. I learned about the studio-theater relationship in my film class, incidentally.

 

[NeoShinGundam]

Wow, MovieBob. I had no IDEA that they made awesome movies like that back in the 30s. Thanks for opening my eyes on that one

 

[FieryTrainwreck]

It's idiotic to blame hardcore nerds for their protective instincts regarding niche content at this point. Every single nerd property that's gone mainstream has invariably gone to shit as well. The first iteration might stay relatively faithful to the source material. Sometimes you even get a decent sequel. But eventually, the suits get their claws in it, attempt to broaden its appeal through needless pandering to unrelated demographics, and you end up with Spider Man 3. It's happened so many times now that you absolutely cannot fault someone for wishing obscurity upon his or her favorite IPs.

Sometimes elitists are just fucking right.

 

[warmonkey]

God.. one thing I cannot stand: subtitle snobbery.

I'm here to watch a movie, not read a book. I don't give a shit what the original actors voices sound like. I won't understand the inflections and tone anyway -- I DON'T SPEAK THE LANGUAGE.

Give me a well-dubbed anything, any day, over anything with subtitles. I avoid shit with subtitles, because the few times I've given it a shot I always have missed things that are going on in the movie because I'm reading shit. That doesn't work. If the movie was made knowing subtitles would be there, they usually try to make sure you can read the important stuff being said while not missing the important stuff going on -- but if it's spoken, I want to understand it being spoken, so I don't have to worry about either missing out on the VISUAL part of the movie just to understand the AUDIBLE part of the movie.

Also I'm almost 100% positive subtitle snobbery stems from anime geeks.. and well, I *hate* anime. And snobby anime geeks.

 

[Flying-Emu]

In the movie Avatar, we mostly want the Military to win. Because the Na'vi are dull and boring. When you want the villians in a movie to win more then the Heroes, it's the movie makers fault.

We?

Are you high? Speak for yourself. I couldn't wait to see those fuckers get torn apart by the Na'Vi.