Saelune said:
I didn't say be a walking mat. If someone is a jerk to you, fuck them. The idea is to just understand other people and know that what works for you may not work for others. I don't respond to tough love very well, but maybe it works better for others. Maybe I don't like people hugging me, so don't, but that doesn't mean you cant let people hug you. Just accept eachother's personal differences when it doesn't hurt you to do so.
Well yeah, what you're saying is obvious, it's something you learn about other people and then you change your behaviour accordingly, but the golden rule is for first impressions, strangers and acquaintances.
You don't owe these people anything, so you don't adjust who you are on their behalf. You can be corteous or nice, sure, but you don't start analyzing them and tailor your behaviour to someone you just met or rarely meet.
If the platinum rule isn't under the same circumstances, then it's misleading. If it
is under the same circumstances, then it's bad advice.
Also, don't forget that a lot of people don't care to change the way they behave around you. That doesn't necessarily make them bad people, they might just have higher standards for you, might not care about certain things/sweat the little things or they might just be oblivious.
I just don't see this as an idea or word of wisdom, y'know? It honestly smacks of entitled behaviour more than anything else, like expecting special treatment. I mean this as a generality of it being a "rule" and I think many will take it that way.
I don't mean to attribute this to you, in fact I think you're probably empathetic and want the best for others and expect similar or some empathetic treatment in return. I'd even argue it's having standards for others in a good way, but by far most people are
not so introspective and nice to others, that it's hard to argue as being general advice.