Words that assure your death in a zombie appocalypse

[zeldafan1593]

"Last mag!"


That exclamation point means if you don't kill the rest of them before that one clip runs out. You are going to be a rather nice brain salad.



EDIT:

Just read this as "Lost magi" after completely forgetting the topic of the thread...

 

[axeman157]

"Don't worry, I think I'm immune!"

Of course you are.

 

[Tizzmarelda]

"Dont worry, its just a scratch"

 

[Suicida1 Midget]

Me: (thud of 50lb staff hitting zombie) Whew, is everyone ok?
A brunetteinspecing her chainsaw) I'am ok. Getting low on gas.
Guy on roids: Damn it! Broke my bat on those last two i hit.
A redhead: (sheathing her machete) I bleeding....but its nothing.
Mesigh) Damn it.
(If she dosnt kill me then its gonna be me checking out places like area 51, pentagon ect.

 

[Ghengis John]

Dont worry, I think we're safe here.


just like any horror film. The second yous ay it, whatever you're running from bursts through the door and kills you.

You know I was just thinking about this the other day when my parents were watching a horror movie and somebody has to make a horror movie where a character says this, then everyone else is quiet and just sorta stares at him, sort of ready for a shock. He says "What?" and looks at all of them. We expect him to die.... NOW... and it just doesn't happen.

"That wasn't so bad."

"Mommy?"

"We can't just leave him/her."

"I can't shoot my sister!"

"Poke it, see if it's dead."

"[insert any combination of letters/words/phrases]"

I think your list is great. There's a lot of great lists here, just had to give you some props.
My list:

"I think that's the last of them..."
"Looks like smooth sailing from here on out!"

And basically any complaints made towards the group leader no matter how stupid or crazy his ideas may be.

 

[TheScientificIssole]

Isn't your quote from an anime? Anime being where crappy writing is dominant.
OT:"I'm going to go get killed by zombies!"

Well that's a pretty biased opinion. Judging by a lot of what people have posted it isn't much worse than other movies/series

All opinions are biased. Also I said dominantly; Some have great writing.

 

[Farther than stars]

I'm just gonna quote Critical Miss here: "Oh my! I so did have unprotected sexual intercourse OUTSIDE OF WEDLOCK!" (Children of Steam #5)
Also ubiquitous across the horror genre: "Everything's going to be alright" as well as "Let's split up" and "I'll go upstairs [alone]".
There's the theme identifying one: "*Yawn* We'll I'm glad I'm retiring today."
And for the added bonus, if you want to get picked off really early, don't talk about emotions, family or friends at all.

 

[zxamike]

"its ok i am a ninja they will never find us"
i wish i had a pic for this "ninjas not even they can hide from zombie" (that was me)
or
"i know you have never had sex so i will have sex with you" or anything with the words and phrases
-sex
-safe
-cant spread like that
-its safe to go to sleep
-we dont need to kill them
-we dont need guns
-and last but not least
-its ok a bet where immune/bet hes/shes immune




captcha:sitity 10-4

 

[AngelSephy]

"I ate the last twinky."

or

"I think we're lost."

 

[RaNDM G]

Four words: "I'll be right back."

Anyone who says that ain't coming back.

 

[invertrainbows]

"MADONNA!!!!!!!!!"

Who can guess the reference.

THAT STUPID WOMAN AND HER STUPID DOG IN DEAD RISING. I SWEAR.

 

[FalloutJack]

"Are you my mummy?"

"The CDC tends not to fuck around, so they're bombing the entire area in five minutes."

"Let's throw dynamite at the fuckers!"

"I'm a leper, seriously!"

"Godzilla's been infected!!!"

 

[furmaster3000]

Guy 1: I WANT MY TWINKIE !!!
Guy 2: And that's why you wan't to go into the supermarket without weapons?

 

[KevinR1990]

Guy 1: "I'm grabbin' another beer, you want one?"
Guy 2: "Yeah, sure."
Guy 1: "I'll be right back!"
(Cookies for whoever gets that reference. Hint: Guy 1 violated two of the three rules in just two sentences.)

"It's probably nothing."

"It's just a cat."

"Yo, word up, dawg!"

"I know what I'm doing with this katana, I'm a ninja! Trust me, this sword was made by Hattori Hanzo himself, not in some Chinese sweatshop! It said so right there on the website!"

"Hey baby, let's fuck." (Applies across all horror movies.)

"It's just a scratch! Trust me!"

 

[6_Qubed]

"I'm black!"

Objection! So was the Dawn of the Dead guy!

OT: "Zombie Survival Guide? Never heard of it."

"But the Guide says we have to... Guys? Where you goin'? COME BACK!!!"

Because if you ever try to apply your nerddom to a real-life imaginary scenario, people will drop you like a bad habit, you'll be alone, and that's how they get you.

(And yes, I do indeed have a copy of the Guide.)

Ouch. Bad assumption is bad. You and I both know that while the book is fiction, it's studying a fictional event realistically. That's part of its appeal. The book is post-modernism at its best. Zombies do not exist, but this is a reasonable do-and-don't guide on how to handle them. In the event of zombies, the wrongful assumptions and bad ploys made in movies won't happen here. It may be the cart before the horse, but let's just say that the cart is ready if the horse ever shows up.

OT: "The authorities will figure this all out, any day now."

Worse assumption is worse. What person do you know in a situation like this ever listens to the guy who actually knows what's going on? I mean, before the guy in the know is dead themselves, and then they're all like "Gee, I guess he was right."

 

[FalloutJack]

"I'm black!"

Objection! So was the Dawn of the Dead guy!

OT: "Zombie Survival Guide? Never heard of it."

"But the Guide says we have to... Guys? Where you goin'? COME BACK!!!"

Because if you ever try to apply your nerddom to a real-life imaginary scenario, people will drop you like a bad habit, you'll be alone, and that's how they get you.

(And yes, I do indeed have a copy of the Guide.)

Ouch. Bad assumption is bad. You and I both know that while the book is fiction, it's studying a fictional event realistically. That's part of its appeal. The book is post-modernism at its best. Zombies do not exist, but this is a reasonable do-and-don't guide on how to handle them. In the event of zombies, the wrongful assumptions and bad ploys made in movies won't happen here. It may be the cart before the horse, but let's just say that the cart is ready if the horse ever shows up.

OT: "The authorities will figure this all out, any day now."

Worse assumption is worse. What person do you know in a situation like this ever listens to the guy who actually knows what's going on? I mean, before the guy in the know is dead themselves, and then they're all like "Gee, I guess he was right."

Wrong. The hollywood cliche is just that. A cliche. People hate cliches.

 

[Scarim Coral]

Let see-

"And to think before this had happen I was a few days away from retirement"

"Everyone for themselves!"

"What is a zombie?"
follow up with-
"How do you kill these zombies?"

"The government isn't lying to us!"

 

[SsilverR]

"I don't wanna die!"
"MY GOD WE ACTUALLY MADE IT!!"

 

[Stalydan]

Applied in any situation, not just horror and zombie media.

"I think we lost them"

Just bite yourself right now because you're about to get a whole lot of that in about two seconds. Better yet, kill yourself. EVEN better, don't say the above phrase.

 

[headbanger97]

"I prefer pistols as my main weapon, sure they are slow to load, but they allow me to be accurate. Now it's Zombie mulching time!"