Worst Escape Ever?

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Tattaglia

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Aug 12, 2008
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In Hastings, New Zealand, two escaped convicts executed possibly the most terrible - and hilarious - escape attempt ever recorded.

The two prisoners made a mad dash for freedom before their prosecution (for assault, stealing a car, and breaking parole, no less) at the local courthouse. They were handcuffed together at the wrist. Upon breaking free from the police's custody, they quickly ran across the road to the carpark... and met a lamppost.

For some reason the two convicts didn't seem to remember they were attached to each other, and hit the lamppost running - slamming into each other and falling to the pavement at the same time. They were soon back in the hands of the incredibly pathetic - and slow - Hastings police force. Here's the NZ Herald article and a YouTube video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OwN-iZsLVU - I didn't film this, sorry for the poor quality.
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10554248

There's only one thing to say at a time like this.
/facepalm
 

rottenbutter

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Aug 5, 2008
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I've seen that kind of thing in cartoons several times, but this is the first time I've seen it real life.

And I...can't...stop...LAUGHING!
 

Dealin Burgers

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Feb 21, 2008
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Crims are always hilarious, like the guy who stole a garbage bag full of bread after accidently shooting his partner.

(After watching the linked video): Who the hell films a streaming video with a handheld camera only to upload it to another site? Children need to be banned from the internet.
 

Mstrswrd

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Mar 2, 2008
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Wow. That was... well amazingly stupid. I have to counteract their stupidity with someone who actually escaped prison using a cardboard box. Actually, there might have been a topic here, on The Escapist, when it happened.

http://snagwiremedia.com/prison-inmate-escapes-jail-using/

Edit: Partially ninja'd.
 

TwistedEllipses

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Nov 18, 2008
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Well at least that's two criminals you don't have to worry about escaping prison...

Tattaglia said:
They were soon back in the hands of the incredibly pathetic - and slow - Hastings police force.
I have to say that is a good description of the police force in my hometown, Hastings England ...
 

ace_of_something

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At the jail i work in some of the housing units have outdoor rec areas built in. In these rec areas there is a window about 2 stories off the ground. These windows used to have a thick mesh on them.
When this wing was new one window was not installed well, an inmate named "Chicken Wing" noticed that the mesh was loose. Every day while playing basketball would make wild shots missing the basket and hitting the window slowly knocking the mesh wire to the point that it was loose. Then one day he scaled the wall quickly and knocked out the window and jumped out.
The window might be two stories from the floor of the mod, but from the ground of the outdoors it's a five story drop. After said drop you're in a yard surrounded by a 16ft high fence covered with razor-wire on the sides and top.

"Chicken Wing" broke both his arms, his ankle, his foot and punctured his lung with a broken rib. On his left arm he shattered his elbow, broke his wrist, and tore a muscle in his shoulder.

He was given the street name 'Chicken Wing' after this incident.

And bars were placed in the windows
 

ace_of_something

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I wonder why NZ cops don't handcuff a person's hands behind their back? A lot more effective than cuffing them to someone who they could suddenly decide to fight. Then the police get sued by the guy who got his ass kicked. "Why'd you handcuff me to that pyscho!?"

A common escape is when an inmate is in work release, day reporting, or something like that. They just don't come back.

It's called a walk away.
 

ElephantGuts

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Jul 9, 2008
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Sad, just sad. I don't see how the cops let them get that far though, or why they were handcuffed to eachother. A cop can't outrun two guys tied together?
 

Tattaglia

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ace_of_something said:
I wonder why NZ cops don't handcuff a person's hands behind their back? A lot more effective than cuffing them to someone who they could suddenly decide to fight. Then the police get sued by the guy who got his ass kicked. "Why'd you handcuff me to that pyscho!?"

A common escape is when an inmate is in work release, day reporting, or something like that. They just don't come back.

It's called a walk away.
We do handcuff convicts like that, except Hastings doesn't deal with all that many crimes. So they're not that great at the policin' business.
 

KittywifaMohawk

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Aug 17, 2008
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CountFenring said:
This is better than the time that one guy escaped from prison in a box.
I wanna know about this. That sounds interesting.


On fact.....I can't stop laughing! They actually hit a post.
The human race is so fucked. Two convicts run into a street lamb. No wonder they're in custody....