Would You Consider this Guy Good-Looking?
- Thread starter WhyWasThat
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Yes, he's a good looking chap.
How is this advice forum related? are you/is he having a few self esteem issues you need help with? Buff out your OP, or this just looks like spam or posting a picture and asking for compliments.
How is this advice forum related? are you/is he having a few self esteem issues you need help with? Buff out your OP, or this just looks like spam or posting a picture and asking for compliments.
I was hoping to keep it as objective and simple as possible, but if you want me to elaborate then I will.EeveeElectro said:
Yeah, I'm having certain self-esteem issues I guess. Insecurities, loneliness, crippling depression at times.
But honestly, right now at least, I'm just curious. And I don't see how this could be considered spam? This is an advice forum, and the title is self-explanatory.
Please elaborate in your original post, otherwise we don't have a clue what your problem is and how to help you.WhyWasThat said:
Spam was possibly the wrong word to use, but I couldn't think of another. What I mean is, there's no discussion value and like I said before we don't know what problem you're having.
It's just like saying "I have a car" then forgetting to say it's broken down and you need help fixing it. From here it just seems "Here's a picture of me, tell me what you think" which isn't us dispensing advice like we want to.
About your problem: Age has a LOT to do with it, I've found. When I was younger, before I got my first serious boyfriend I was "I'm soooo ft and ugly, I'm gonna die alone!" so much so, I threw myself on the first person who gave me the tiniest bit of attention and ended up doing stupid things at a stupidly young age which I regret.
As I got older, I started to care less because I realised it was my personality that was the most important. I will admit, I think looks count so far, but it's much easier to love a nice person than an attractive one.
There's a line in a cracked article that's something like, "As you get older, you look in the mirror and you might not be happy with how you look but it's just like a stain in your shirt. It's disheartening to see but you can easily shrug it off and keep going."
It's pretty good advice, you start worrying about other things like if you can afford bills or petrol and your insecurities take a back seat.
I'm assuming you're single, which does knock a few people's confidence but it won't always be the case. When you're in a loving relationship, your confidence will soar. I was having a particularly ugly day a few days ago, I told my boyfriend and he tells me "You should always have beautiful days, because you are."
When you know someone loves you no matter what you look it, you won't feel ugly again because you have enough love in your heart for someone else and when someone is kind, they can never be ugly.
Pick out your best parts, like your eyes or nose or hair, whatever you get compliments on the most. Focus on them and you'll feel much more confident which will show when you're talking to people.
DON'T compare yourself to other men, it won't end will. Don't listen to insults because those who insult others have issues they need to work through themselves.
Do smile, be confident. You're never as bad as you think. Everyone is beautiful in their own way if they can just have the confidence to let themselves shine.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Eevee. It means a lot.
And you're right, I am single. In fact I've never had a relationship of any kind. I'm 19, and this is what's getting me down the most. I have friends, and I am very grateful for those guys. But, y'know, a bit of companionship with a member of the opposite sex would be lovely too.
And as for 'picking out my best bits', I'm afraid I don't really know where to go with that one because as far as I can remember nobody has ever complimented me on any of my looks!
And you're right, I am single. In fact I've never had a relationship of any kind. I'm 19, and this is what's getting me down the most. I have friends, and I am very grateful for those guys. But, y'know, a bit of companionship with a member of the opposite sex would be lovely too.
And as for 'picking out my best bits', I'm afraid I don't really know where to go with that one because as far as I can remember nobody has ever complimented me on any of my looks!
You'll find someone. I do think there's someone out there for everyone. Don't rush and don't panic because having a companion isn't the most important thing on the world.WhyWasThat said:Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Eevee. It means a lot.
And you're right, I am single. In fact I've never had a relationship of any kind. I'm 19, and this is what's getting me down the most. I have friends, and I am very grateful for those guys. But, y'know, a bit of companionship with a member of the opposite sex would be lovely too.
And as for 'picking out my best bits', I'm afraid I don't really know where to go with that one because as far as I can remember nobody has ever complimented me on any of my looks!
Relax and take your time. People will be more likely to warm to you if you seem chilled but confident.
Well have few compliments on me as I do love making people feel good about themselves:
The overall shape of your face is nice, it compliments your features well.
Your hair looks pretty good, sure you'll find a style that suits you even more one day.
A nice pair of eyes, although the photo quality is bad, they look good.
A nice pair of lips which women notice more than you think.
Physically, you shouldn't have a problem finding a girl. You just need to work on your confidence and find the right way to make friends with potential love interests.
I wouldn't say you was ugly. If your having self esteem issues then I think that you are thinking things over a bit too much.
You need to know that a face is a face, granted pretty ones are nicer to look at but think of how you look at women (I assume you are straight, sorry dude had to put this incase) it's certain features that catch your eye. personality, shape etc etc.
Being a male you cannot decide what a woman will find attractive, well, generally and it's the same thing the other way around.
Us men are stuck with this pressure to look like brad Pitt in fight club and women have the pressure of feeling they have to be super skinny.
we all worry about our looks but we need to accept who we are, ain't no point worrying about how you look because it won't change anything.
the only thing I can advise Is be confident in yourself. I know I know it's what they all say but it's true, don't be scared to talk to people, often they feel like you and will be glad that you made the first move.
You need to know that a face is a face, granted pretty ones are nicer to look at but think of how you look at women (I assume you are straight, sorry dude had to put this incase) it's certain features that catch your eye. personality, shape etc etc.
Being a male you cannot decide what a woman will find attractive, well, generally and it's the same thing the other way around.
Us men are stuck with this pressure to look like brad Pitt in fight club and women have the pressure of feeling they have to be super skinny.
we all worry about our looks but we need to accept who we are, ain't no point worrying about how you look because it won't change anything.
the only thing I can advise Is be confident in yourself. I know I know it's what they all say but it's true, don't be scared to talk to people, often they feel like you and will be glad that you made the first move.
Well said, thanks for the tip. And yes, I'm straight.carlsberg export said:
I actually think you hit the nail on the head there. If I'm sitting next to someone that I don't know or whatever (usually somewhere like a college lecture theatre) I almost always feel the desire to strike up some sort of conversation with them, but I usually don't have the confidence (courage?) to do it. The relief I feel when the other person initiates conversation with me is probably evident on my face haha.
You can't base someone's attractiveness on how photogenic they are. A person's mannerisms, gestures and even the sound of their voice all add up to someone's overall charisma. The Human face isn't a static object and I've known people who are really sexy in real life where that just doesn't come through in a still photograph.
It's all about how you carry yourself rather than how the camera depicts you. But if you want to seem more attractive to someone, just smile to them.
It's all about how you carry yourself rather than how the camera depicts you. But if you want to seem more attractive to someone, just smile to them.
Yes, I?d say you?re good-looking. People with low self-esteem are always their worst critics; I know this from experience. Don?t compare yourself to other men, or even judge your appearance based on what one woman says, because attractiveness is ultimately subjective and ? although it sounds cheesy ? personality is what matters above all.
Even if you aren?t a naturally confident person, fake it ?til you make it. Stand tall. Try to smile. Dress smart (and I?m not talking about fashion or anything). Don?t be disheartened if it doesn?t work the first couple of times (not to mention that trying to get with a girl at a party is more random luck-of-the-draw than anything, especially what with how drunk many people tend to get). There is no universal dating formula; it?s just a matter of trying to talk to people, seeing if you like them, seeing if they like you back, and taking it from there.
Even if you aren?t a naturally confident person, fake it ?til you make it. Stand tall. Try to smile. Dress smart (and I?m not talking about fashion or anything). Don?t be disheartened if it doesn?t work the first couple of times (not to mention that trying to get with a girl at a party is more random luck-of-the-draw than anything, especially what with how drunk many people tend to get). There is no universal dating formula; it?s just a matter of trying to talk to people, seeing if you like them, seeing if they like you back, and taking it from there.