Write outside your comfort zone

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Baby Tea

Just Ask Frankie
Sep 18, 2008
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stormcaller said:
Zhalath said:
omigod reality is like really dark and stuff and life is bad and it like hurts and stuff and like you can like love things and stuff but someday they won't be there and you'll be like lonely and stuff

I can safely say I would never write or speak this way.
Paris Hilton in The Goth(ple) Life?
I can't help but read 'Goth(ple)' like 'gospel' with a lisp.

I'll throw my hat in here!

There once was a man named Abdul.
His friends thought him quite the fool.
They would poke fun,
So he grabbed his gun,
And sold it at a local hock shop for some extra cash. The money didn't go far, but he payed some bills had enough left over to rent a fun movie and invite his buddies over for a fun 'guys night'.
He got hit by a bus two days later.

TADA!
 

Matronadena

New member
Mar 11, 2009
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hmmmm... Think I need to break the mold and come up with something similar to the Robert E Howard line...
 

IamSARAhearMYgrr

New member
Apr 24, 2009
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And then he looked her in the eye and said
I will always love you, but even more I love Fred
And she saw her gay lover fade away
In the moonlight of another day
And now in her mind is the color red
Because she wants to just be dead
So she jumped off the couch
Tried not to slouch
Ate some lead
And wound up dead
Just as she wished
And she will be mished
Very very much
Especially at lunch...


Yeah this is definitely not something I would ever actually write... I was actually trying to make the worst sounding thing I could and I'm pretty sure I achieved my goal! How sad!
 

nova18

New member
Feb 2, 2009
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Darkside360 said:
The Gamers Poem​

The Frag, the frag, the beautiful Frag
Lush with colors, and burning flesh
Blood sprayed everywhere in a mess
Cries and moans of little kids
All in uproar in their squeaky pitch
Calls of fag, gay, and fucking *****
You say I have no skill, that you are best
But I just pwnd you, now take a rest​

/thread
Its like he cut open a can of whoop-ass, poured some n00b sauce on it and served it in a bowl of win.
 

Booze Zombie

New member
Dec 8, 2007
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I awaken in that white room, in my white coat
As I leave, I hear my team's desperate chorus
"Medic!" "Doctor!" "Medic!"
A crescendo of pain, desperation and need, I feel at home
My medigun passes over the screaming masses, we move forward as one
The Intel comes into our possession, a female voice informs us of victory
Just one more day in the life of a medic, just one more victory
 

Trivun

Stabat mater dolorosa
Dec 13, 2008
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Rascarin said:
I challenged myself the other day to write something which I've never tried before (and I'm usually quite uncomfortable with). I've already posted it in "The Short Story Thread", but what the hell...

Personal space was something she obviously had no concept of.

Or, perhaps more likely, she saw my desire for personal space and delighted in invading it. I wondered if standing too close, hugging me and even trying to kiss my cheek were all part of some twisted game of hers, the aim of which was clearly to try and make me squirm in her presence. I knew for a certainty that it was nothing more than that; her interests lay in a completely different direction. The sole purpose was making me feel uncomfortable.

Needless to say, it was a game I didn't particularly enjoy.

I stood in the corridor one evening, listening to a conversation between two friends, arms folded across my chest, when she rounded the corner. She called my name loudly when she saw me, unable to mask the mirth from in her voice as she stretched out her arms to try and trap me once more in one of her dreaded hugs. I sneered and backed away, only to find my escape route blocked by the two talking friends. She caught me, wrapping her arms around and squeezing far too tight for comfort. I squirmed.

She leaned back to look at me, and I scowled as fiercely as I could manage. She laughed and asked in her silly, cheery, girly voice, "Did that make you feel violated?"

"A little," I growled in return. She laughed again as she let go, eyes sparkling with mischief, and I sensed she had claimed another victory. I was outraged. I considered her for a few moments, eyes narrowed, before suddenly reaching a decision. Perhaps the way to win her stupid game wasn't to not play along, but to beat her at it. I seized her by her upper arms and shoved her back against the opposite wall, the length of my body crashing against hers. I seized her mouth before she could voice her surprise, my tongue forcing through her lips. I plundered her mouth in a few angry sweeps, trying not to taste her.

She raised her arms to try and push me away, but I merely released her biceps and grabbed her wrists instead, immobilising her against the wall. I was stronger than her, and she knew it. I maintained my vice-like grip even after she stopped struggling, determined to show her that I was in control now... that I was winning.

"I'll give you violated," I thought to myself. I nudged her legs apart with one of my own, pressed a thigh into the gap and pushed, my whole body up moving against hers. I ignored the shudder than ran through her and the sensation of her heartbeat pounding through her chest into mine, withdrawing from her mouth and biting her lower lip, hard. She made a noise then, finally, a shocked little whimper as sharp teeth pinched soft skin. I wasn't gentle, stopping just short of actually drawing blood. I shifted my thigh again, causing another shudder.

I forced my way back into her mouth again, eliciting a second bout of struggling from her arms, but I held her firm. It wasnt a kiss, far from it. A kiss was affectionate and sensual, and those were the last things I wanted to be. This was punishment. I was punishing her; I was raping her mouth with my tongue. Abruptly, I withdrew and stared into her face, and I was pleased to see genuine fear in her eyes. I smirked as another idea came to my mind, and when I pushed against her again it wasnt her mouth I sought, but her neck. I bit and sucked the pale flesh, determined to leave a mark, my mark, on her. She whimpered again, squirming.

Satisfied, I pulled away, releasing both neck and wrists and leaving her to sag against the wall. One hand shakily rose to touch the red mark on her neck as she tried to get her breath back. I wiped my mouth on my sleeve, trying to purge the taste of her from me. Our audience in the corridor stood with eyes wide and jaws agape, stunned. I let the silence build for a few minutes as they all watched me.

"Two can play that game," I told her finally, as I took my car keys from my pocket and turned to leave. As I walked away, I muttered to myself. "Checkmate."
I know I already did a critique of this story in the Short Story thread, but I can't help but reference it now too, it's just that awesome and well written :)

Otherwise, my favourites here are:

This:

WanderFreak said:
Death
Stricken from this world in an instant
Leaving me alone
My heart is raped
Torn asunder from beneath my breast
Why
I cry to the sky above
Darkened clouds not caring
A raindrop falls
Why did I drop my taco
And this:

Darkside360 said:
The Gamers Poem​

The Frag, the frag, the beautiful Frag
Lush with colors, and burning flesh
Blood sprayed everywhere in a mess
Cries and moans of little kids
All in uproar in their squeaky pitch
Calls of fag, gay, and fucking *****
You say I have no skill, that you are best
But I just pwnd you, now take a rest​

/thread
Just pure win, all of these :D

By the way, I'll post something soon enough, I think really though it won't be out of my comfort zone as darkness and flawed individuals, and the dark recesses of the human soul, are kind of my forte. I'm not even emo either, but I suppose I kind of feel a bit like one at heart... ;)
 

Cpt_Oblivious

Not Dead Yet
Jan 7, 2009
6,933
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pffh said:
Cpt_Oblivious said:
If Haiku's are 17 syllables I did this right, if not then ignore me.

I sit and the darkness grabs for me, dragging me down with it.
I fall.
your haiku is wrong,
I'm sorry, five seven five
is the correct way.

seventeen is right
but the form must be perfect
alas it is not.
Yea, I just got served.