You can have any superpower, but with one catch...

[VoidWanderer]

The ability to get rid of internet threads that make no sense.

EDIT: Granted this makes me seem like an ass, but this is the best I could come up with for being a professional troll

 

[IndomitableSam]

Teleportation. I can teleport to work, laugh at everyone else who has to deal with the commute, and benefit myself as well. And generally annoy everyone everywhere because my life becomes insanely easy.

 

[Matthew Kjonaas]

How about the ability to read other people's minds ( have to be thinking about them will reading their mind so I do not read too many minds at once) and afterwards I can use their secrets for what ever I want! I could annoy so many people by revealing secrets or making small references to "Well at least no one we know would do that..." that would be so much fun and I would act clueless on purpose so it would look like I just choose the first thing I could think of.

 

[willsham45]

The power to corrupt any machinery or computer I use so I can use the "thing" fine but the next person will have it break, crash, explode etc.
This will also expand to include things that are used though someone else on my behalf like a call centre person or shop assistant person.

 

[Dragonclaw]

Teleportation, usuable only on other people's possessions...especially money, both physical and digital...imagine the havok I can create at checkout lines everywhere while making myself rich.

 

[JdA]

I can make a half-cup of water appear in any article of clothing I want.

Ever step in a puddle, and it gets in your shoe, and you have to wear that shoe all day?

Oh yeah, I'd be the king of that.

 

[Revolutionary]

Well seeing as I can only go around trolling people, i guess I'll take teleportation because that has some pretty good mischief potential.

 

[Calibanbutcher]

Jedi Powers on the level of the force unleashed. (Lightsaber included)
May the annoyance be with you.

 

[Malicius]

The answer is kind of obvious, powers of the Wabbajack!

 

[itaywex]

Memory alteration, making people forget keys, dates, meetings, girlfriends etc...

 

[Generalissimo]

The ability to read and control minds.... The trolling possibilities are endless!

 

[The Heik]

So yeah, pretty dang straightforward premise; for whatever contrived reason that I'll leave you to come up with, you now possess any superpower(s) you wish, but with one catch: You can only use them to annoy your fellow man. If you even attempt to use your powers for anything other than annoyance, away they go.

Easy peasy: Reality manipulation. Hell I know the exact way to do it.

Take it away Jim Carrey!!!!

 

[Thee Lost One]

The ability to spontaneously generate and manipulate freckles on any person I so desire.

 

[Sean Hollyman]

Umm the ability to clone myself at will, that could lead to some HILARIOUS results in large crowded areas.

 

[Yopaz]

The ability to remove electricity from either a small or a large area. Imagine almost beating that boss and then your TV powers down while you get killed. Or your console turning off in a crucial point. All electricity turns off at night and the alarm clock wont make a sound the next morning. Cars wont start because I have drained them.

Do I win this thread?

 

[madster11]

Yeah i'll have the stop/slow time ability thing. Does 'killing my enemies' count as annoying? Because i think i'll use my powers for evil and live happily.

 

[Launcelot111]

The ability to make people's drinks evaporate when they're not looking. If I have no real say over my cool power's use, I'll just get the power that amuses me the most.

 

[RADIALTHRONE1]

The ability to make people trip on nothing. Just sit on a bench in the middle of the street and trip random people walking by. And it doesn't even have to be the "flat on your face" kinda trip either, it could just be a small stumble to slow you down.

The power to make small rocks/pebbles appear in people's shoes.

The power to make people spill their drink/beverage in their lap.

The ability to make people drop their spoon/fork/knife on the ground, then not be able to find it.

Power to make somebody's pen run dry, or pencil automatically break.

Ability to make drinks scalding hot or freezing cold.

 

[RipRoaringWaterfowl]

Self Teleportation.

I was already planning on using it to annoy David Cameron, so, no problems.

 

[Zealous]

The ability to manipulate reality as I see fit. I'd have to be able to turn on and off at will so me thinking about getting some food won't turn all of existence into a huge plate of pasta. Although that does sound quite good actually...
But yeah, I'd be able to confuse the hell out of everyone, make some (or maybe most)of them go insane and maybe even get my own following as a deity. And if it all goes balls up for me, i can just wipe everyone's minds, warp all of reality to something new and start over again. it's perfect.