You discover your children are attracted to each other...
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You do realize that LetalisK's post was more of a joke targeting the fact that as humans we tend to violently lash out at what makes us uncomfortable, yes?Jusey1 said:
OT: Being gay myself, I would most certainly support my hypothetical children if they were gay.
As for the topic of incest, if I had found out that it was simply sexual experimentation, in my current mindset, I wouldn't have that much of a fuss about it. They did get to that age where a little experimentation happens sometimes (Lord knows I did.)
Now, if it was full on relationship, I would not condemn them, but I would have to sit with them and calmly talk about it with them.
I did not and am not surprised.Dr. Thrax said:
Why did you snip out the part of my quote that addresses this particular line of reasoning?[/quote]
I did not wish to bother with your whole post. Just that one part caught my eyes and I replied to it only.
Depends, really (e.g. what kind of children they are, how close they are, if they'd been sexually abused). I'd probably just attempt to staunchly deny and ignore it, which is why I'd be a shit parent. If they were, like, under 10 or something, I might just put it down to "playing doctor". But if they were teenage...yeah, I'd be like, "What the fuck happened there, then?"
Woah, have you been reading my mind? My next writing project includes two twin sisters (both in early 20s) who are in a lesbian relationship together. SPOILER - One is a main character later, the other dies and her murder is a key plot point. Part of the development of these two though, and their interactions with other characters, includes how uncomfortable some people are to the situation, and how the main protagonist has already known them for several years so is at least used to the whole thing.
Anyhow, I don't know how I'd react in real life if this happened, since I don't have kids and wouldn't know until it actually happened. At any rate, my own thoughts on incest are a bit of a tricky topic and could be considered a bit controversial. In essence I think incest shouldn't be demonised PROVIDED it's between consenting adults only, and provided there's no children born as a result. So keep the rubbers on, people! That's where the problem is though, most people will just say "urrrrgh, squick!" at the idea of two relatives boning, whereas I see it as just another aspect of human sexuality. I don't want to get with any of my relatives, and definitely don't want to indulge in incest myself - the closest I've come is finding two girls who I have only met once or twice each, who are second cousins of mine, rather attractive. Nothing more. However, if someone else finds his sister to be attractive and nice and develops feelings for her, and she feels the same way about him, and they're both of legal age and able to make a sane and sensible decision themselves, then I don't see why they should be vilified for being in love.
At that point, then, the issue comes more onto the fact that it's two sisters or two brothers. In that case, I don't have any problems with gay people in any way shape or form. So it wouldn't be a problem in that respect, at least not as far as I'm concerned. Incidentally, before some people try bringing out the religious argument, don't forget there's plenty of incest in the Bible, not to mention the rarely-discussed topic of Adam and Eve's children...
Anyhow, I don't know how I'd react in real life if this happened, since I don't have kids and wouldn't know until it actually happened. At any rate, my own thoughts on incest are a bit of a tricky topic and could be considered a bit controversial. In essence I think incest shouldn't be demonised PROVIDED it's between consenting adults only, and provided there's no children born as a result. So keep the rubbers on, people! That's where the problem is though, most people will just say "urrrrgh, squick!" at the idea of two relatives boning, whereas I see it as just another aspect of human sexuality. I don't want to get with any of my relatives, and definitely don't want to indulge in incest myself - the closest I've come is finding two girls who I have only met once or twice each, who are second cousins of mine, rather attractive. Nothing more. However, if someone else finds his sister to be attractive and nice and develops feelings for her, and she feels the same way about him, and they're both of legal age and able to make a sane and sensible decision themselves, then I don't see why they should be vilified for being in love.
At that point, then, the issue comes more onto the fact that it's two sisters or two brothers. In that case, I don't have any problems with gay people in any way shape or form. So it wouldn't be a problem in that respect, at least not as far as I'm concerned. Incidentally, before some people try bringing out the religious argument, don't forget there's plenty of incest in the Bible, not to mention the rarely-discussed topic of Adam and Eve's children...
This is statistically unlikely as far as I understand things. Even for opposite sex children it is unlikely. Pheromone signs and other super-subtle physiological things guard against attraction between closely related individuals. I'm sure plenty of people go through a phase where they feel like a sibling is the only one who understands them due to shared circumstances or whatever, which might generate a romantic feeling in some, but long-term I'm thinking the biology wins out.chinangel said:
As for what I'd say? 14 / 16 years old? no. I don't have kids yet, but I don't want mine dating at 14 at all, in or outside the family (which has additional issues obviously) and I'd expect my 16 year old not to take advantage of my 14 year old in a romantic manner. Years of difference between partners are bigger the younger the partners are - in any event, and especially in this situation I would strongly suspect something was wrong with my 16 year old that was endangering my 14 year old, which would require some action on my part as a parent.
The same-sex variable doesn't make any difference to my answer. The lack of danger of an impaired child resulting from some union of the two - well I simply don't want my 14 / 16 year old making children of their own in any situation. Or having sex that won't produce children, for that matter.
Love is love but children (and 14/ 16 means children, even if they are "teens") aren't usually versed on the full spectrum of love - love like family, love like friend, love like lover, etc. Being siblings, I'd assume they were confused about the love like family vs. love like lover.
So - as their parent, to answer your primary question - I would talk to them about it, at length and if they did not see my point of view I would eventually separate them by fostering them out to other relatives for a summer and wait for the situation to resolve itself - because "love" at 14 / 16 is not usually a lasting thing (read: it usually lasts until one pisses the other off or either one sees someone else they "love" more).
I dunno.
I'd probably start with calling "The Missus" into the room. Then I'd say some complete gibberish followed by me fainting.
I'd probably start with calling "The Missus" into the room. Then I'd say some complete gibberish followed by me fainting.
(BTW useless info because it depends on the person, But I do have religious view. Which is against homosexuality and incest .Just cause their my kids doesn't mean I can it force it on them.)
I would do what I heard before, Stop them any physical contact(for at least a year), no display of affection around the dinner table, and if yah want to have (safe)sex, in the name of all that is holy wait till your out the house.
For the physical contact, if they aren't sneaking about or trying to play without then they should be able to keep a healthy relation with each other. After a year of no physical interaction they should either have given up on it or know each other well enough to be comfortable with each other. Display of affection, well I know yah two like each other, don't do it front of others because it is frowned upon; but we will come out with this later. Lastly the sex thing, not in my house. Since I'm assuming yah love each other after everything, get a place that you two can do it till the sun goes down. Then I'll call to make it awkward.
I would do what I heard before, Stop them any physical contact(for at least a year), no display of affection around the dinner table, and if yah want to have (safe)sex, in the name of all that is holy wait till your out the house.
For the physical contact, if they aren't sneaking about or trying to play without then they should be able to keep a healthy relation with each other. After a year of no physical interaction they should either have given up on it or know each other well enough to be comfortable with each other. Display of affection, well I know yah two like each other, don't do it front of others because it is frowned upon; but we will come out with this later. Lastly the sex thing, not in my house. Since I'm assuming yah love each other after everything, get a place that you two can do it till the sun goes down. Then I'll call to make it awkward.
I'd make sure they were sexually educated and then try and discourage them from doing anything. Ultimately there's not much I can do to stop them, though.
Also, possibly have a panic attack or two. Even if they were opposite genders, I'd likely react the same way.
And when we throw int the age in question, it's quite possible they're going to experiment, even with each other. So the question of "attraction" may be a loaded one.
Doesn't mean I advocate it, but the double standards are lovely.
For example:
All other factors being equal, a woman in her 40s (or possibly even late thirties) is more likely to breed a child with birth defects than an incestuous couple. If we were honestly concerned about birth defects, wouldn't we be preventing women over a "certain age" from breeding?
Incest only becomes a problem if it's a repeated chain of events. There are also some authority issues that can be bundled in. A parent-child relationship is the most likely to be the source of coercion, but even an older sibling can coerce a younger. I understand concerns, in other words, but biological isn't the most immediate one. At least, not as much as people make it out to be.
I'm probably going to be grossed out by the thought of my children banging anyone.
Also, possibly have a panic attack or two. Even if they were opposite genders, I'd likely react the same way.
Incorrect. It's unlikely, but nowhere near impossible or "pretty much so."Zira said:
And when we throw int the age in question, it's quite possible they're going to experiment, even with each other. So the question of "attraction" may be a loaded one.
That's the wonderful thing about life. It's okay for "normal" people to all sorts of things which we complain about other people doing.lacktheknack said:
Doesn't mean I advocate it, but the double standards are lovely.
For example:
Well...MarsAtlas said:
All other factors being equal, a woman in her 40s (or possibly even late thirties) is more likely to breed a child with birth defects than an incestuous couple. If we were honestly concerned about birth defects, wouldn't we be preventing women over a "certain age" from breeding?
Incest only becomes a problem if it's a repeated chain of events. There are also some authority issues that can be bundled in. A parent-child relationship is the most likely to be the source of coercion, but even an older sibling can coerce a younger. I understand concerns, in other words, but biological isn't the most immediate one. At least, not as much as people make it out to be.
Saying this as the pinnacle of maturity I am....Fappy said:
I'm probably going to be grossed out by the thought of my children banging anyone.
God, it's awkward enough being friends with most of my ex's family.dylanmc12 said:
You have the right to fantasize about anyone or anything you want and if it's consensual sex with all involved agreeing and understanding what they are agreeing to,(along with no inbreeding or spreading of disease) then I see no problem with it.
I find in a lot of situations where I don't know what the hell to do, I just avoid the issue and end up doing nothing.
This would likely be one of those situations.
If they weren't extremely blatant about it (I figure that's something they would try to keep secret) I would pretend I didn't know.
It's probably not the right thing to do, but it's an honest answer.
This would likely be one of those situations.
If they weren't extremely blatant about it (I figure that's something they would try to keep secret) I would pretend I didn't know.
It's probably not the right thing to do, but it's an honest answer.
Fappy's right, teenagers don't know what the fuck they actually wan't to do with their lives, I'm telling this being a teenager myself, still tho I'm just confused on what the fuck to do with my life but that's it, if they where older I suppose it would be a hard thing to deal with at first, but eh why bother going crazy about it, let them do what they wanna do, as weird as incest is, I wouldn't get mad at them, on the other hand if I catch them in the middle of well... business. HEADS WILL ROLL. Maybe i dunno, I don't have to worry about that shit right now.Fappy said:
Uhhhh, not against Same-Sex relationships or anything but this is just... wrong
Really Really wrong, my response go to therapy to figure out what's going on,
besides this type of thing wouldn't likely happen anyway we as a species just aren't attracted to siblings...
Really Really wrong, my response go to therapy to figure out what's going on,
besides this type of thing wouldn't likely happen anyway we as a species just aren't attracted to siblings...
pretty much...inu-kun said:
I'm open minded, but this is unacceptable. Ignoring the social taboo associated with this, imagine the affect on the family, and the psychological impact on everyone involved. What happens when they break up? They're sixteen, and they're siblings, they will break up. It's a time bomb that will scar the whole family. Imagine the physical, mental and emotional scars it would have on any children. For something like this to happen, the children would have to have some serious psychological issues. To pretend like everything okay would be... unethical. I'd promptly get them counseling, to make sure they didn't suffer any kind of abuse that I was unaware of.
While being attracted to a sibling might not be that abnormal its still just an attraction. Attraction is not love I am attracted to half of the people I see in one day. To actually encourage something like that is pretty terrible. Set aside the social stigma they would face and the fact that it is illegal, if somebody found out you were actually encouraging something like that you could easily have your kids taken away. To be honest I would support you having your kids taken away. Even 14-16 year old kids don't really know what they want and you could be setting them up for something that could ruin their lives or at least do some mental damage. Seriously I hope you are just kidding and if you are not I hope you never have kids because you obviously lack reasoning and judgment skills.
Separate them until they're adults. Not teenagers, ADULTS, 19 or 20.
If they're still attracted to each other after the hormones wear off and they're fully aware of the situation, and they still want to do it, it's fine. But they're likely to be making a serious mistake if they're doing it as teens. It's your job as a parent to try the best you can to prevent them from doing something they'll regret later.
If they're still attracted to each other after the hormones wear off and they're fully aware of the situation, and they still want to do it, it's fine. But they're likely to be making a serious mistake if they're doing it as teens. It's your job as a parent to try the best you can to prevent them from doing something they'll regret later.
Sure... why not. Let's just start saying everything is okay and be done with it. Let's just throw our arms in the air in regards to... EVERYTHING. Because everything is okay. Nothing can be wrong. Feelings might get HURT!