You kill. How?

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Tonimata

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As insane as this may sound (and feel free to flame me for how isnane this sounds), when I am in a mood, there is nothign more therapeutic to me than take a stroll down the street, and like Queen's song Stone cold crazy implies, killing people that I meet. ALthough not really of course, I would be typing this from jail regardless of how bad the law system is in this country. What I do is imagine it. Maybe this is a product of excessive videogaming or having a traumatic infancy or lack of oxygen during birth: whatever. I just thought it would be an interesting idea to see how you'd kill someone, to what crazy, inhuman, out of this world extremes would you go to in order to commit murder. I don't want you to do so, God forbid, but just imagine for a moment: you are in a room, with one other person of your choice. Anything in this room can be granted to you, as long as the purpose of so is the murder of the other person.

Feel free to elaborate as much as you want to.
 

JRCB

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Jan 11, 2009
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I give people a colonoscopy with a brick. They usually kill themselves afterward.
 

Tehpwnsauce

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Apr 30, 2009
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It really depends on who I was killing. If it is the people who I hate than I'd want to use my bare hands, perhaps with a knuckle duster.
 

S.H.A.R.P.

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Well, when I'm in a car I destroy everything I see with my laser eyes. So yeah, killing Cyclops style would be my choice.
 

Panzer_God

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Apr 29, 2009
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Needle to the sensitive flesh behind the ear or snapping their neck.
 

Panzer_God

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S.H.A.R.P. said:
Well, when I'm in a car I destroy everything I see with my laser eyes. So yeah, killing Cyclops style would be my choice.
I thought I was the only one to do that.
 

S.H.A.R.P.

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Panzer_God said:
S.H.A.R.P. said:
Well, when I'm in a car I destroy everything I see with my laser eyes. So yeah, killing Cyclops style would be my choice.
I thought I was the only one to do that.
It's not the first time I encountered this on the Escapist, I'm pretty sure there are others too.
 

SharPhoe

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Feb 28, 2009
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Panzer_God said:
S.H.A.R.P. said:
Well, when I'm in a car I destroy everything I see with my laser eyes. So yeah, killing Cyclops style would be my choice.
I thought I was the only one to do that.
Behold! OPTIC BLAST!

It's more common than you might think.

On topic, though, I don't think I could ever do this.
 

AngloDoom

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Aug 2, 2008
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I'm more for doing it in a satisfying, but subtle way. Example, staging an accident, or at least making untraceable sabotage.

This could be anything from poison, to getting them to get hit by a bus. For some reason, the thought of killing someone myself feels almost below me...

Hmm, I think I just developed the ego necessary to become an evil genius...Then again "Poison" and "Fast bus" aren't exactly genius.

Ah well.
 

llewgriff

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Feb 12, 2009
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I'd chain all the doors in my office and go wild with a Kalashnikov and 2000 rounds of ammunition.
 

Lazy Kitty

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Exactly how I'd kill would depend on my mood, but it would probably be something slow and painful.
 

GohdomSploicers

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May 9, 2009
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American Psycho Style.

Stroll down the street whistling a nice little tune, wearing a quality custom tailored suit, and an axe.
 

Lazy Kitty

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carnkhan4 said:
I would give you the details, but they would be used against me in court again...
Well, the courtroom usually has some more victims, I mean people, in it, which you could also kill.
 

Jepix

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Mar 26, 2009
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Scalpel. Clean horizontal cut over the stomach so that the guts spill out. Strangle them with the guts before bleeding picks them off.

Alternatively headshot people with dumdum bullets. Fun for the whole family.
 

TwistedEllipses

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Rex Dark said:
carnkhan4 said:
I would give you the details, but they would be used against me in court again...
Well, the courtroom usually has some more victims, I mean people, in it, which you could also kill.
Meh, they won't allow weapons in :( ...although the judge does a tiny hammer...hmm...

...I'll be right back I have to...erm...feed the cat...?
 

bookboy

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Mar 16, 2009
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to quote Yazhee (as best I can remeber the quote) from the Mercenaries 2 review:
"you now have the task of assembling a large aresenal of weapons and shoving up his Big fat ass!"

need i say more?