Your FTL Fail stories.

[Trooper924]

Over the last few weeks, I--like many others--have been enjoying FTL: Advanced Edition. During my latest run with the Zoltan cruiser, I acquired a crew teleporter and took great joy in using it in conjunction with mind control, just having a blast tearing apart the enemy ship--so much so, that I didn't pay attention to the ship's health and the ship exploded with my mantis and Rockman still on it. D'oh.

So my question is, what stupid, completely avoidable stunts have you pulled that have gotten your crewmembers killed or your ship destroyed?

 

[Liquidprid3]

First time against the rebel fleet. I died. Alright. Second time I was ready. I destroyed the fleet, and had no health left. And, you know, this was the first time against the fleet, so I, uh, died. Still haven't beaten them since.

 

[antidonkey]

I think it was my 2nd or 3rd attempt at FTL I died on the first jump. I wound up in a sector with solar flares and a Rock ship. I just couldn't keep the fires under control. This was before I was made aware of just opening the doors to vent oxygen. It was annoying and hilarious. I've still yet to beat this game. Guess I need to download the updates and give it another go. Hopefully easy is less brutal now.

 

[NuclearKangaroo]

last time with the stealth cruiser, i faced the final boss and aced the first 2 phases, losing only 1 hull oint, however i didnt upgrade the cockpit, and in the last phase the boss mind controlled my pilot, rendering my super engines, completely worthless, i got completely wrecked

 

[Barbas]

Well, the first fail was probably sitting in front of my screen and staring at the damn thing for twenty-three minutes before thinking up a name for it. I also seem to remember making a cavalier jump into an asteroid field, only to have some annoying insectoid creatures beaming aboard my ship and prodding their disgusting mandibles into my crew and ship systems before setting fire to the place and blowing it up. Utter. Fuckhouses.

That game didn't bring out the best in me. :c

 

[deathmothon]

Haha. My favorite was the first time I got a crew teleporter. "Let's try this thing out". Ported to the first ship I fight. It was one of those automated drone fighters with no oxygen on board. *stare at the screen for about 30 seconds, Alt+f4 for the day*

 

[Shuguard]

So on the first time I made it to the last planet to fight the final boss I never moved and lost. My reasoning was I didn't see the lines from the planets on which to travel to. So I just sat at the home planet and just lost. I thought the game had actually glitched out too. Then I watched a youtube video on what to do in the last area and I was rather annoyed. FML.

 

[Tanis]

I accidentally turned down the Oxygen.

Battle comes.
I'm low on O.
Enemy ship destroys O.
Enemy ship destroys doors.

Everyone dies.

 

[Altorin]

I accidentally turned down the Oxygen.

Battle comes.
I'm low on O.
Enemy ship destroys O.
Enemy ship destroys doors.

Everyone dies.

If you add hacking to that equation, you get what my friend and co-pilot refer to as "Being Darth Vadered"

Also, if you add a cloning bay and somehow manage to defeat the ship that wrecked your O2, then you get something completely different.. the conga line of death as your cloning bay fill with every crew member, and they spawn and die over and over until you can manage to fix the o2.

 

[Shamanic Rhythm]

There was the time I was having a great run with Crystal B, and jumped into a fairly routine fight. Midway through the battle the ship panicked and started to charge the FTL, so I thought 'no problem' and teleported all four of my elite boarding crew into their cockpit. Then I realised that they only need to have one enemy in the cockpit to charge the drive, and bam! Ship jumps away with my boarding party /ragequit.

Also as Crystal B, I was jumped by 4 Zoltan boarders and a Zoltan cruiser. Rather than kill the boarders first and then dispatch the cruiser, I got all cocky because I had a Zoltan Shield bypass and just teleported straight onto their ship, while trying to asphyxiate the boarders. As I was doing so, a hacking drone hit my cockpit and the pilot was trapped inside. Next thing I know, because of my venting, the boarders had changed course and two of them came inside the cockpit. With level three doors hacked, there was no way he could get out in time, and with my boarders on the enemy ship there was no way I could get help to him in time. RIP vetted pilot.

 

[Uncle Comrade]

Started a game with the Zoltan Cruiser, the very first jump led me to an event where my ship was boarded by pirates. Two of my crew died pretty much instantly, my pilot only managed to survive by barricading himself in the medbay and venting the oxygen from every other room in the ship.

I managed to survive five more jumps after that (mostly by running from fights as soon as the engines were charged), but there's only so much you can achieve with a solitary crew member, especially one who has to keep running backwards and forwards between various systems to power them up.

I accidentally turned down the Oxygen.

Battle comes.
I'm low on O.
Enemy ship destroys O.
Enemy ship destroys doors.

Everyone dies.

That reminds me of a costly lesson I learned, namely, "If a plasma storm depowers your oxygen system, don't assume it'll power back up once you're out of there. In fact, reroute power to it immediately, you fool."

 

[Eve Charm]

This was my first normal win... With mantis B it's basically a boarding drone and two mantis, My second encounter one engi teleports over while my mantis and boarding drone are over wrecking the place, I said screw it it's an engi I'll air out my ship. In it's dying breathe he takes out the teleporter and I was like Ffffuuuuu oh I got a crew member, Fix it damnit!.

Now fast forward to the end of the game where I still have a 2 man boarding party and about 5 other crew, drone control with a hull repair so I come in at fill health every phase, it's going poorly, fires my teleporter is broken with the mantis stuck in the missile bay. " Everyone fix the damn teleporter!" so once I get one bar, instead of getting them back, like an idiot, I sent the rest of my still living crew on to the rebel flagship...

I couldn't do anything but send my hull repair drone out and keep killing the systems the AI fixed till I finally won.

Thanks to the effort of whatever the mantis ship's name and the crew of "Blank"

 

[Generalissimo]

gonna do mine greentext style, happened in advanced edition

>near the end
>crew of 3
>flagship hacks medbay
>not oxygen
>feellikeasmartass.jpg
>crew all wounded near the end of first stage
>go directly to medbay
>forget about hacking
>hacking activates
>crew locked in
>ded
>ragequit

 

[flying_whimsy]

Of the 100+ runs I've had in the game, I've only claimed victory 37 times (and only once on normal). I have a lot of fail stories, especially with the new AE content (my first encounter with hacking ended that run). Also, I never send help when it comes to giant alien spiders: I've lost more crew than I can count to those things. It also took a long time before I'd try using boarding parties after my first attempts ended with a) the crew dying on an airless drone (oops), or b) the crew getting lost because the ship either jumped away or I'd forget to turn off auto firing.

I have a strong fear of solar flares: I've lost more ships than I care to remember from beacons too close to stars. On my first go at the AE update, my second jump put me too close to a star and the enemy hacked my shields and killed my weapons with the first volley. They boarded my ship and everything caught fire. Eventually, everyone suffocated and the enemy ship burned to a crisp: my one lone crew member had to make a mad dash for the O2 system, but he died just before he got across the depressurized part of the ship.

Once, I ran out of fuel and the rebel fleet caught up to me (this was late in the game, too: sector 5 or 6) and the ship attacking me was completely invulnerable to my attacks just as I was safe from it. Realizing I was stuck with no way out, I simply vented my ship and put everyone out of their misery. In a worst case scenario, I'll usually kill my own crew and/or drop the shields rather than let it drag on.

Often, I'll have systems damaged, ioned, or get caught in an electrical storm and for whatever reason they won't get powered back up once they are restored and I won't notice until it's too late. I don't mind when the RNG or the enemy ships/tactics overpower me, but I hate when I lose because I did something stupid. Nothing worse than that moment of 'oops, forgot to turn the shields back on to full strength' just as the enemy fires and nothing you can do will save the ship.

captcha: point blank. Damn right.

 

[Zhukov]

I got the super secret crew member and was on my way to the super secret location to get the super secret ship.

Then I noticed that the super secret crew member had some kind of super secret ability.

So I used it.

And ended up locking my super secret crew member in a room with no oxygen.

 

[Happiness Assassin]

First time going through the game with an emphasis on taking out the enemy crew. Had a teleporter, multiple fire weapons, and a large boarding party of Rockmen. All the upgrades to take over any ship. Up til the end I could handle anything and everything. I went through the galaxy taking over ships, killing everyone on board, and stripping them down. So I wanted to see how I could handle the Flagship. The first stage was a *****, with me only holding out. Then, my Rockmen team takes out the final unit on board the ship. SURPRISE ************! The ship has an on board AI. I let out a long "Fuuuuuuuuck..." and tried to retreat, but in the heat of battle, I had taken my eyes of the enemy health bar and the ship flies off, with my entire boarding party on it. I knew I had just lost. My health was too low and I couldn't get back to a supply station, so I grit my teeth and charged into battle, aware that I was at my end. As soon as the first drone overload hit, it was over.

 

[The Eupho Guy_v1legacy]

Using the Ion Stunner on a room that my boarding party was in (by themselves, I might add) was a fail, to be sure. The aim was to take down their shield subsystem, but my 3 basic lasers and ion stunner were not cutting it, so I sent over two crew members to help it along. I tasked the lasers to other subsystems, but forgot the ion stunner. Long story short, my crew members were stunned then murdered by the enemy crew.

Also, I've lost count of how many boarding parties I've lost to the other ship jumping away.

 

[Altorin]

Also, I've lost count of how many boarding parties I've lost to the other ship jumping away.

Just so everyone is clear, a cloning bay will not fix this. Not sure if a backup DNA augment would let it fix it. but a regular cloning bay, given that scenario, just shrugs its shoulders and says "meh."

 

[Evil Moo]

I reached a stalemate with the first stage of the rebel flagship. I had disabled all of it's weapons by teleporting into each of the rooms one by one, so it had no way of damaging me. However, I then realised I didn't have the weaponry to get through all of the shields, having relied on a fire beam to get through most of the game to that point. I could board the ship once more, but because of the large number of crew and them swapping out to the medical bay before any of them died, all I could do was beat them up until I had to retreat.

In the end I just solemnly turned off the oxygen and opened the doors, accepting the inevitable.

I have also lost the odd boarding party to accidentally destroying the ship or, once (having defeated the first stage of the flagship), letting it jump away. As the flagship was still present for the next stage I hoped my crew would still be there when I came to battle it. Sadly this was not the case.

On a happier note of sort of failure, I managed to win the game after my ship was destroyed. Just as the fatal shots fell upon me, my ship fired off a last volley, which also destroyed the final stage of the flagship. Happily this counted as a win, otherwise I would have been rather annoyed.

 

[Terratina.]

gonna do mine greentext style, happened in advanced edition

Gonna copy your style, bro.


>FTL Advanced Edition.
>The OG Kestrel.
>Easy Mode.
>whatineedtounlockshizz.jpeg
>Sees Glaive Beam in store, purchases it.
>Roflstomps mofos for a couple of jumps and sectors.
>Third sector after the purchase of the ALMIGHTY GLAIVE BEAM.
>Rolling in Scrap.
>Finally upgrades to blast doors and purchases the Pegasus Missile Launcher.
>Forgets about low amount of fuel.
>Encounters some rebel scum on one beacon.
>Mofo knocks my doors out.
>Fire, fire everywhere.
>Whole crew fails at being firemen.
>Everyone ded.