Zero Punctuation: Alan Wake

[Mako SOLDIER]

So many of you aren't going to get this game just because Yahtzee gave it a shitty review? Isn't that kind of what he gets paid to do?

It was a funny review and I enjoyed it, but I thought Alan Wake was one of the best written games I've ever played. It might be second only to Call of Cthulhu.

Too many people who don't understand that Yahtzee's reviews, while entertaining, are essentially professional trolling. Alan Wake is easily one of the best story-driven games of the last 10 years. Anyone who thinks the story was bad probably just got pissed because they had to actually think about the ending rather than having it explained to them slowly.

 

[Marmal4de]

I was hoping Yahtzee would cover this one, Great review.
I personaly liked the game judging from what I have played so far but it's starting to get repetitive and seems like it will stay that way.

 

[oktalist]

Hah, Yahtzee just described Pie in the Sky, a British crime drama in which the detective can only think when he's around pastry, so each week the crime has to conveniently take place in a bakery or within walking distance of a pie shop. Yes.

Seriously? I thought he was making a satrical pun on how crime dramas make shitty gimmicks to set themselves apaprt from other crime dramas.

He was. I don't think the reference to PITS was intentional.

And it's not quite as bad as I made it sound. It's just that the detective is also a part-time chef and owns a resaurant, so the action alternates between crime-solving and pie-making.

 

[mexicola]

It was not as fun as I hoped it was. He spent most of his time talking about how he gets stuck in the forest all the time.

How does it come Yahtzee never reviews grand strategy games like Hearts of Iron 3? That would be pretty awesome.

Or not. He would just say something along the line of "I would have had as much fun fucking around in Windows Excel". He already mentioned his dislike for Total War series and they have some graphics, while Harts of Iron is all about strategy so it doesn't seem he would be too thrilled. (I like it btw)

Anyway good enough episode, standard Yahtzee.

 

[Mako SOLDIER]

Nevermind, only pressed the 'quote' button once. Crazy of me to think that would result in a poste actually being quoted

 

[mchoueiri]

Personally I think Alan Wake is a great game so there. I bought it played it and loved it.

 

[Lemon Of Life]

I played a demo of the game, and from that I didn't want to buy it. Good to see that I didn't waste my money

There's a demo? Cool, I'll check it out.

Funny review there, Yahtzee, now go and do Red Dead Redemption.

 

[saiyanwarrior]

I enjoyed that a review a lot been waiting for yahtzee to review it for a while, sounds like the game is similar to alone in the dark, potential to be good but sadly misses the mark, rather like finaly fatasy 13, although I'm suprised it took nine bloody years to make it, took that long for the world to beat germany twice.

 

[MrDead]

Too many people who don't understand that Yahtzee's reviews, while entertaining, are essentially professional trolling. Alan Wake is easily one of the best story-driven games of the last 10 years. Anyone who thinks the story was bad probably just got pissed because they had to actually think about the ending rather than having it explained to them slowly.

Or because it was fairly standard with a couple gimmicks. Though the actual last 2 minutes of the game was pretty good.

 

[Shadow-Fox]

And just for the sake of correcting people about minor, basicaly unimportant mistakes (because i just love to do that):
It's "Episode Eins" not "Episode Ein"
although i can forgive your for not wasting time by finding out how you to correctly put the "ü" in "Fünf"

 

[MrDead]

I enjoyed that a review a lot been waiting for yahtzee to review it for a while, sounds like the game is similar to alone in the dark, potential to be good but sadly misses the mark, rather like finaly fatasy 13, although I'm suprised it took nine bloody years to make it, took that long for the world to beat germany twice.

Damn that was funny.

 

[manas]

I am surprised Yahtzee didn't mention Silent Hill once during this review. Same kind of foggy atmosphere, same kind of, "stuck in town by self" plot, same bad combat, isn't Alan Wake even made by some of the same people as Silent Hill?

This game has nothing to do with Silent Hill.

Anyway, this was a great review.

 

[oktalist]

Judging from the responses from AW fans, I feel like Yahtzee is now intentionally ripping on good games to make the point that that's all he ever does, so quit confusing criticism with rejection. He is a critic, not a reviewer, as everyone keeps saying.

 

[Moosh50]

The biggest problem Yatzhee has with horror games is that he plays them on Normal difficulty. Why the fuck would anyone do that? It's survival horror, but the Normal difficulty setting makes it a third-person shooter with bad illumination.

 

[MrDead]

The biggest problem Yatzhee has with horror games is that he plays them on Normal difficulty. Why the fuck would anyone do that? It's survival horror, but the Normal difficulty setting makes it a third-person shooter with bad illumination.

It's conceivable it's because he's a professional game reviewer, bar owner, freeware developer, and writer. I'm sure I missed something else as well.

 

[DarkhoIlow]

Another funny review Mr.Croshaw,the "Gentle Ben" part really cracked me up =P

 

[MeatSpace]

The biggest problem Yatzhee has with horror games is that he plays them on Normal difficulty. Why the fuck would anyone do that? It's survival horror, but the Normal difficulty setting makes it a third-person shooter with bad illumination.

Yahtzee is bad at video games. Everyone knows this. (Or should have figured it out) Confirmed that he played GOW on normal or lower because he said they could 'Wade through bullets' he played dead space on Normal as well. Also he said Demons Souls was impossible. Which is bullshit. It has a steep learning curves yes, but once you get the hang of it the difficulty levels out.

The reason he avoids multiplayer is again, because he is quite shitty at most games and thus is intimidated by competitive multiplayer.

 

[VoidEternal]

I forgot this game was released....

 

[MrDead]

Nice review. Something positive for a change. Especially since I don't like to be scared shitless, unlike Yahtzee. So that's a ++ for AW.

And well, a reason for me to look forward to the game when it finally comes out on the PC. Well of course there will be no point then, since I've already seen around 75% of it already...

Alan Wake for PC was canceled and unless I missed something not uncanceled.

 

[Nashidar]

Well I have another favourite saying thanks to Yahtzee:

"Let's not look a gift whore in the poo pipe."