Zero Punctuation: Diablo 3

[Orkimond]

Pro tip: normal difficulty is a quarter of the game.
Don't get me wrong, loot stays a big thing and the game doesn't really get challenging until hell difficulty, but the nuance and skill in the combat is almost entirely relegated to the later difficulties, in the same way that CoD on recruit is an absolute joke. Also, time isn't really an excuse given that normal difficulty takes 8 hours to complete and you regularly review games that take 12-14 hours. A couple of acts on nightmare would've at least have fixed some of your less genre-focussed criticisms.

 

[giggetygooo]

A look at the gold auction house will tell you that aint gunna happen. So much crap on there, and while someone could, in theory, find an item worth buying, by the time you have scrolled through all the crap (filters on), you could have found your own pair of magic pants (+1-2 fire damage, .00000003% chance to stun an enemy) by simply playing the farming simulator yourself.

 

[griffinith]

It wouldn't be the first time, although at least he mentioned it this time around. I don't much care for the review, it doesn't seem to hit on a lot of decent problems with the game. Glad someone is getting paid to say things about popular games.

 

[Psychotic]

Honestly, always found dungeon crawlers to be an acquired taste.

Despite what people may think about Diablo 3 it's basic gameplay is still very much like Diablo 2's and other dungeon crawlers: Pick a class, run around slaughtering thousands of the same generic monsters for several hundreds of hours hoping to find "phat lewtz".

That's it. There's nothing truly complex about these games, honestly. I enjoy them because that's all I expect from them: wanton slaughter. If you're expecting anything deep from a dungeon crawler than you should probably look elsewhere.

 

[Slowking]

Not one account with authenticator, which is free, was compromised. Only accounts who were keylogged and unprotected were "hacked".

Actually there are a lot of reports of people with authenticators getting hacked. Ofcourse a keylogger is a convenient excuse.
But to believe that a keylogger could lead to such a mass-hacking, even without authenticators (which were present in many cases), you have to be a special kind of fanboy.

But even if that had worked. What kept you from making an offline single player mode, that can't tranfare items into the online game? Right, nothing except greed. You figured if everybody had to be online anyway, they would stumble over the real money auction house eventually and line your pockets.

I AM UNEDUCATED AND I THINK EVERYTHING IS OUT TO GET ME!!!

There are files server-side that are not client-side for protection against duping, cheats and hacks. Client has only ability to read them once connected to server. You can't get those files and use them to make a hack without hacking the server itself, which is a LOT of effort and risk compared to potential gains.

*rofl* You have no idea how that stuff actually works, do you? Ofcourse the server keeps your items so you can't dupe them and a few other things. That does not mean that there couldn't be a SEPERATE offline single player campaign, where your stuff is kept locally.
Maybe you should get a clue, before you attack people.

Well I don't want to play online. I have to deal with stupid people on a regular basis in my real life. My free time I would like to spend alone or with friends, thank you very much.
I should not have to suffer through lag, server outages, etc. just because you are greedy. I already payed 50? for a half assed game. That should be more than enough.
There are a lot of other games out there, that offer way more for that kind of money and where the makers don't try to bleed me slowly with microtransactions.

Microtransactions are optional and only among gamers. Game is not half-assed only because it requires you to play online to protect everyone from unfair advantages of cheaters.

Luckily, they don't need you or your money. Kind of sad that biased and uninformed reviews are ruining image of a great game.[/quote]
Ofcourse they are optional. Did I ever say they were mandatory? Please show me where I did. Thing is, if you get people constantly playing online the threshold to buy in the real money action house is much lower. You are already right there, you see all the cool stuff.
That's how that stuff works and Blizzard decided that everybody should be tempted, even the people who are only.
Blizzard may not need my money, but they'll need money from countless gamers they disappointed with this. Gamers tend to have goog memorys in these things. Next time a lot less people will preorder a Blizzard game and if reviews say that it is crap, they won't buy it.
So I really hope for Blizzard that they learn from this. It might not have cost them this time, but if they pull something like this again, it most certainly will next time.

 

[Undeadpool]

It's always fun to read the forum after Yatzee gives a popular game a bad review.

You mean all the people chiming in fully agreeing to prove "they ain't a part of the SYSTEM!!!!"

MAAAAAN! This ain't my dad....this is a video game!

HAW! Glad someone got it!

 

[Abedeus]

Not one account with authenticator, which is free, was compromised. Only accounts who were keylogged and unprotected were "hacked".

Actually there are a lot of reports of people with authenticators getting hacked. Ofcourse a keylogger is a convenient excuse.
But to believe that a keylogger could lead to such a mass-hacking, even without authenticators (which were present in many cases), you have to be a special kind of fanboy.

BZZZT WRONG.

Bashiok confirmed not one account with authenticator was "hacked". Anyone who said "I HAVE AUTHENTICATOR GOT HACKED" is a liar or got one after he was hacked.

But even if that had worked. What kept you from making an offline single player mode, that can't tranfare items into the online game? Right, nothing except greed. You figured if everybody had to be online anyway, they would stumble over the real money auction house eventually and line your pockets.

I AM UNEDUCATED AND I THINK EVERYTHING IS OUT TO GET ME!!!

There are files server-side that are not client-side for protection against duping, cheats and hacks. Client has only ability to read them once connected to server. You can't get those files and use them to make a hack without hacking the server itself, which is a LOT of effort and risk compared to potential gains.

*rofl* You have no idea how that stuff actually works, do you? Ofcourse the server keeps your items so you can't dupe them and a few other things. That does not mean that there couldn't be a SEPERATE offline single player campaign, where your stuff is kept locally.
Maybe you should get a clue, before you attack people.

You are the one who doesn't know how that stuff works.

This is how it would go.

Separate offline client.

Hackers get all the information they need to easily dupe items and crash the economy, because item info, monster info and everything else required to play the game is handed to them on a silver plate.

Everyone is angry because Blizzard didn't learn from history. Seriously, why am I even talking to someone who didn't even do research?

 

[Aigars Mahinovs]

To be fair, D3 is a great game, *if* you use a class that is suited to your style (and for D3 that might be different from your usual style, I would recommend Demon Hunter or Barbarian to the reviewer), get to at least Hell difficulty (where it starts to get hard and interesting), try multiplayer with friends (optional, but it is much faster to level that way and easier to survive in later stages), try out different skill layouts to find out what suits you at each stage (it can mean a world of difference).

Online play is just fine now that initial rush has passed, assuming your network connection is above dial-up.

Random dungeon generation is not fully random - basically for each area there is either one or a few base maps and each maps has multiple locations where key elements may spawn. The real reason for that randomness is that when you are playing the same level for 10th time you can't know where exactly Caves of Frost entrance will spawn, so you have to explore the dungeon. Which is the whole point of the game.

The plot was perfectly adequate in my opinion - it did all that is needed to tie all three games in a bow and allow us to actually *SPOILER* kill Diablo in the end of the game. The fact that many plot points are predictable is par for course for the genre and is also well explored and laughed about by the idle dialogue of the main character and his companions.

Which brings me to the companions, who basically give you the taste for multiplayer in single-player mode. In multi-player companions stay in town, so it is not that busy on screen. Witch hunter with all its summons might be the busiest character on screen - for others are much easier to understand visually what is going on.

I have spent around 60 hours on the game and I still have not gotten my character to level 60, have not finished Hell (to start on inferno) and have no unlocked the secret levels, so I have a lot yet left to explore and experience. And I can easily see that experience will be significantly different on a different class as well, so there is a ton of re-playability, if you like that kind of stuff. It is well worth the money. Oh and as a WoW player I did not pay for it a dime, but knowing what I do now, I would not hesitate to pay full price for it.

 

[Levi Covey]

some please help its bugging me which episode does he say shadow humper its killing me bc its so funny i cant remember which one it is

 

[nightowlc]

Three and a half years later, I decide to give D3 a try. And find that Yahtzee's review is extremely accurate.

It's not a bad game, and if I were in my 20s looking for something that was both repetitive but took concentration -- and I spent a lot of time in college playing games like that while parts of my brain were decompressing from calculus homework and circuit diagrams -- I'd love it.

Having just gotten my lvl 70 monk to paragon level 25, and looking at friends who are at levels in the 400s, 500s and 600s, and already swapping out new gear for old, I agree with the analogy of opening up Excel, scrolling down and finally typing "the most splendid trousers of them all."