Zero Punctuation: Just Cause 2

[MpSai]

I suspected I wasn't the only one who immediately started calling the grappling hook a "hookshot", cause that's what it fucking IS!

 

[addeB]

And I'm sold...is there a PC version?

Yes.

 

[Dok Zombie]

I laughed a bit too loudly in the silent library and the jet-powered dolphin and the bear.

Also I like the way he pronounced "Mars".

Dok Zombie approves.

 

[Kivan12]

I think this review would have been so much better in high quality.... *sarchasm at the new publishers club*

 

[Deadlock Radium]

Lots of cats.

Oddly enough, I almost want to get this game now.

Me too. Funny review too!

 

[Yokai]

Amazing, this may be the first time I've absolutely agreed with everything the man has said. Of course, I've played well over 70 hours by now, so any drawbacks are obviously outweighed by the benefits.

And I'm sold...is there a PC version?

Yes.

And it's not just a crappy port either. It's quite nice.

 

[Makszi]

Yahtzee I would like to let you know that I love you. You gave this game a well written, well thought-out and an HONEST review unlike that fuck Greg Tito who was too busy to actually play the game and too stupid to figure out the controls! Thanks bud, you're the best.

 

[Seneschal]

He's VERY energetic this week. This was one of the more dynamic reviews in a while.

 

[A1]

Okay. I guess I'll spell it out even though I probably shouldn't have to.


"The story and dialogue are absolute tripe on a bike but apparently I'm the only one who cares."

Note that he actually says that he cares. And next with regard to the fun part:


"Some might say that's enough. Some might say I'm too hard to please. But some can shut their fucking mouths."


So it would seem that we have yet another Yahtzee consistency problem. Or at least another Yahtzee consistency question.

I still don't agree with you. I'd tell some people to shut their fucking mouths regardless of whether or not they agreed with me. Because most people ought to.

As for story and dialogue? It sounded to me like he was saying that they could be significantly better, but it really doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter what you would do. What matters here is what Yahtzee is doing.

And Yahtzee never said that the story and dialogue problems don't matter. He didn't even say anything to that effect.

Could you please stop being constrained by your own opinion?

 

[edgeofblade]

Yahtz-man... you hit on one of the best ways to make a game fun. Give the player legal cheats. I call it "people think they want realism, but they don't".

 

[Kollega]

This review was awesome, best one in a long while. Cat references, hilarious lines, and why? Just Caaaaaaause!

By the way, there are mods for PC version. Most popular one is "no blackmarket cutscenes".

 

[Divine Miss Bee]

why do i love yahtzee so much? just cause!

bad joke. but seriously, one of the better reviews lately.

 

[BlueInkAlchemist]

Benjamin Yahtzee Mana-Bar-Maestro Croshaw, you just saved my damn Wednesday. Thank you.

[sub]Not that you care.[/sub]

Great use of felines, a fantastic opener and yes, some people out there in the wilds of the Internet just need to SHUT UP.

 

[Tommy T.]

I was a bit disappointed that there was no mention about the atrocious voice acting. My god that's the biggest pile of shit that makes me not to buy Just Cause 2.

Otherwise it was pretty funnee.

 

[gillebro]

aww, cats. this review makes me wonder if he likes them or if he's using them for comedic effect. because cats are funny.
either way, i like cats.
i also like twix, and expect that he does too. because he's human (i think).
(seriously, have you ever met a person that doesn't like twix?)

 

[dmcc85]

sorry, but there is one little thing i do not understand:
what is a SANDBOX?
is it some kind of childs-playground,
OR
a place for house-cats to shit?

eather way, it is funny, but each time YAHZEE uses that word i am unshure about the meaning of it.

so, is a "SANDBOX-GAME" a game a 5 year old child could play and win in several hours, or one that is very shitty=?

 

[dmcc85]

aww, cats. this review makes me wonder if he likes them or if he's using them for comedic effect. because cats are funny.
either way, i like cats.
i also like twix, and expect that he does too. because he's human (i think).
(seriously, have you ever met a person that doesn't like twix?)

I do hate TWIX.
why?
- JUST CAUSE 2.

*wink*

 

[Mafi]

I have to agree very strongly; this game was absolutely *FANTASTIC!*... for about three days, by which point I'd exhausted the potentially limitless possibilities of the game and had run out of things to do other than the side missions.

That said, 25kmx25km isn't a play area to complain about; if only more games would have a sandbox of such generous area.

 

[SnipErlite]

Amusing review, and also amusing number of probation idiots trying to be cool. Heh.

Yeah Just Cause was never a serious series. But it is damn good fun.

 

[EnzoHonda]

I liked that review. Why? Fucked if I know.

To me that was one of Yahtzee's better "reviews." It sounded like a "rent it, or pick it up if you're ok with a large sandbox game." We all know why we like Yahtzee, but every once in a while it's nice to get a real review. So this was nice.