15 Things i learned from videogames (1985-95)
- Thread starter jim_doki
- Start date
Liquid Snake anyone?Iceman23 said:
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Break TV's By jumping on them. (sonic)
The bad guy you killed at the end of the first game turns out to be alive. (streets of rage 2, among others)
A fat man can run just as fast as the speedy blue hedgehog. (sonic 2)
I was refering to how nearly everyone who isn't a main character/boss sounds like they are from the US (admittedly this only became a real issue in MGS3 but, whatever.)MRMIdAS2k said:
Anyway another fact:
Mask salesmen are very, very creepy and can give small children nightmares. (Legend of Zelda Majora's Mask)
You may be saving people from an evil terror, but unless you have money, the townsfolk will not give you proper equipment or a warm bed. Fortunately, all monsters share our currency. (Every RPG ever made)
All allies can be brought to aid you by breaking specially marked barrels (Donkey Kong)
Spinning your ponytails fast enough will make you fly like a helicopter (Donkey Kong)
All things can be killed by crushing them with your body mass (... You should know this one)
Mushrooms make you bigger. Flowers make you rainbow, and bestow the ability to shoot fireballs. Stars grant you invincibility (...)
The princess is always in another castle (...)
Spinning your ponytails fast enough will make you fly like a helicopter (Donkey Kong)
All things can be killed by crushing them with your body mass (... You should know this one)
Mushrooms make you bigger. Flowers make you rainbow, and bestow the ability to shoot fireballs. Stars grant you invincibility (...)
The princess is always in another castle (...)
If you kick a Cerberus in the head it will spew forth blue spirit balls which can turn you into either a werewolf, dragon, werebear or weretiger. (Altered Beast)
Mushrooms make you grow.
Flowers make you throw fire.
Leaves make you a raccoon that can fly.
Feathers make give you a cape that lets you fly.
But logically only a frog-suit will make you a frog.
Oh, and getting hit by anything makes you small again.
Tetris was the best attempt by the USSR to destroy capitalism.
Sub-zero can't freeze you if you put your arms up. (MK)
Fast punches don't hurt, but a slow punch hurts a LOT. (Street Fighter II)
Super Mario II was all a dream.
You can only buy one potion at a time. What do you think this is? Costco? (Original Final Fantasy)
Most KOEI games sucked back then too.
Blowing in a cartrige will make it work. (All consoles back then)
HOLD RESET WHEN YOU TURN THE POWER OFF!
Flowers make you throw fire.
Leaves make you a raccoon that can fly.
Feathers make give you a cape that lets you fly.
But logically only a frog-suit will make you a frog.
Oh, and getting hit by anything makes you small again.
Tetris was the best attempt by the USSR to destroy capitalism.
Sub-zero can't freeze you if you put your arms up. (MK)
Fast punches don't hurt, but a slow punch hurts a LOT. (Street Fighter II)
Super Mario II was all a dream.
You can only buy one potion at a time. What do you think this is? Costco? (Original Final Fantasy)
Most KOEI games sucked back then too.
Blowing in a cartrige will make it work. (All consoles back then)
HOLD RESET WHEN YOU TURN THE POWER OFF!
Steroids give you muscles immediately but too many of them will change your DNA... and that's a good thing (Altered beast)
When an evil enemy nation invades by dropping innumerable legions of soldiers via parachute, they're only a threat if three/four of them land on the same plane of axis. (Paratrooper, or whatever it was called when renamed for your area)
Apparently Nuclear weapons are incredibly destructive now matter their size (any modern setting shooter) but you can conveniently have one disguised as back molar to blow through the bars on a holding cell aboard an alien mother ship (Duke Nukem 2)
Any evil empire's air force use the Kung-Fu movie henchmen's guide to combat as their tactical doctrine. Dancing about the screen firing randomly, before shifting directly into incoming fire. (Raptor, Zone 66, just about any plane shooter type)
A plumber is the most hazardous and demanding occupation anybody can do (If you can't guess this, there's no hope for you)
A shark is not only capable of breathing out of the water, but also a very talented driver of a go-kart (Wacky Wheels)
Human beings can project fire randomly from their hands when fighting (Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter)
Children can leave home if they intend to commit their lives to raising twisted parodies of real animals. (Pokemon)
When a small party of alien's attack a excellently equipped military base, they will slaughter 99.9999% of the population in two minutes, and yet be wiped when that one survivor comes back 2 years later with 2nd hand bionics and a barely functioning gun, possibly because he was mercenary for one of those years (ElectroMan)
In space nothing gets done and all wars are stalemate, unless you hire a mercenary. (Terminal Velocity, Descent, Solar Winds)
A powerful ray gun can't turn everything into retarded versions of itself.
Pogo sticks let you bend most of the laws of physics regarding movement and gravity.
Pogo sticks are easy to use and fun.
(Commander Keen)
Apparently Nuclear weapons are incredibly destructive now matter their size (any modern setting shooter) but you can conveniently have one disguised as back molar to blow through the bars on a holding cell aboard an alien mother ship (Duke Nukem 2)
Any evil empire's air force use the Kung-Fu movie henchmen's guide to combat as their tactical doctrine. Dancing about the screen firing randomly, before shifting directly into incoming fire. (Raptor, Zone 66, just about any plane shooter type)
A plumber is the most hazardous and demanding occupation anybody can do (If you can't guess this, there's no hope for you)
A shark is not only capable of breathing out of the water, but also a very talented driver of a go-kart (Wacky Wheels)
Human beings can project fire randomly from their hands when fighting (Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter)
Children can leave home if they intend to commit their lives to raising twisted parodies of real animals. (Pokemon)
When a small party of alien's attack a excellently equipped military base, they will slaughter 99.9999% of the population in two minutes, and yet be wiped when that one survivor comes back 2 years later with 2nd hand bionics and a barely functioning gun, possibly because he was mercenary for one of those years (ElectroMan)
In space nothing gets done and all wars are stalemate, unless you hire a mercenary. (Terminal Velocity, Descent, Solar Winds)
A powerful ray gun can't turn everything into retarded versions of itself.
Pogo sticks let you bend most of the laws of physics regarding movement and gravity.
Pogo sticks are easy to use and fun.
(Commander Keen)
I learned that walking over a med-kit or armor instantly heals you.
Giant bugs always have the urge to kill humans and only humans.
I learned that if an enemy doesn't die from bullets you need to hit a giant nearby button 5 times.
If someone offers to refill your mana by following them into their house do it.
Anyone in a suit of armor is a one man killing machine destined to save the planet.
All wars are stalemates until one bad ass is called on by one or both sides.
Governments never use their armies just a band of adventurers or one soldier and a team he picks up along the way.
Giant bugs always have the urge to kill humans and only humans.
I learned that if an enemy doesn't die from bullets you need to hit a giant nearby button 5 times.
If someone offers to refill your mana by following them into their house do it.
Anyone in a suit of armor is a one man killing machine destined to save the planet.
All wars are stalemates until one bad ass is called on by one or both sides.
Governments never use their armies just a band of adventurers or one soldier and a team he picks up along the way.
Resitance is absoloute zero in all atmospheres and the ground does not provide friction: only treading space.
Bullets travel at the speed of light, as does sound.
Blood is only a picture shaped like the object it is on.
Science still neverworks.
Bullets travel at the speed of light, as does sound.
Blood is only a picture shaped like the object it is on.
Science still neverworks.
*sniff* I loved that shark.Eyclonus said:
You can be bad enough to defeat opponents armed with shurikens, poles, nunchucks, swords, clubs, chains, fan, tonfas but still get your arse handed to you by a guy named "Blues" (Yie Ar Kung Fu -1985)
If you jump on a rainbow it will shatter like an ice sculpture, and anything standing under it will turn into a diamond.
If you kill enough zombies, insects or sentient military vehicles this way, one of them will turn into the Holy Grail.
The Holy Grail can summon lightning. (all from Rainbow Islands)
-Nick
If you kill enough zombies, insects or sentient military vehicles this way, one of them will turn into the Holy Grail.
The Holy Grail can summon lightning. (all from Rainbow Islands)
-Nick
