Stoned Wallabies Blamed for Crop Circles

Lauren Admire

Rawrchiteuthis
Aug 8, 2008
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Stoned Wallabies Blamed for Crop Circles


You may think extraterrestrials are to blame for crop circles, but apparently, it's actually drugged-out wallabies.

It turns out that Scully and Mulder got it completely wrong. According to Tasmanian state officials, wallabies are the miscreants behind the creation of crop circles found in local opium fields. The cute critters feast on the poppy seeds and then get "high as a kite," hopping in circles and trampling the crops.

Wallabies aren't the only animals going on all night drug binges. Other sources [http://www.nydailynews.com/news/us_world/2009/06/25/2009-06-25_wallabies_in_tasmania_australia_getting_high_on_poppy_plants_creating_crop_circl.html] have reported that sheep and deer regularly get into the poppy fields and exhibit the same strange behavior - walking in circles repetitively until they eventually "crash." With 49,420 acres worth of poppy fields, it's a wonder there are any animals left in Tasmania that can still walk straight.

Though the crop circles seem to be an innocent byproduct of devouring the "Dover's Powder," I believe they're actually in cahoots with aliens to bring ultimate destruction upon the human race. That's right. I'm onto you, wallabies.

(Image [http://www.flickr.com/photos/suneko/30290260/])

Source: io9 [http://www.themercury.com.au/article/2009/06/25/80825_fun-weird-news.html]



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Time Travelling Toaster

The Toast with the 'Tache
Mar 1, 2009
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That's ... intresting, wallabies on drugs instead of aliens >.> actually that makes the idea of crop circles more intresting :D
 

Jamash

Top Todger
Jun 25, 2008
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'Stone the Crows Wallabies!'

That's pretty interesting, but it doesn't explain how the mashed marsupials manage to pilot the flying saucers in the first place...
 

Sporky111

Digital Wizard
Dec 17, 2008
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Hmm, sounds like somebody out there is just desperate for an explanation. And I'm sure that EVERY SINGLE CROP CIRCLE is right next to a poppy field.
 

Simalacrum

Resident Juggler
Apr 17, 2008
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hee hee, thats pretty funny actually...

ehem. in contribution to the topic. Somehow I don't think these things are the cause... crop circles afterall are often perfect cricles, and I doubt they would achieve that in a state of high... besides I'd rather believe its aliens
 

13lackfriday

New member
Feb 10, 2009
660
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Marsupials have all the fun...

Getting stoned out of their fucking nonsentient minds and screwing with conspiracy theorists worldwide...
 

Glerken

New member
Dec 18, 2008
1,539
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Sporky111 said:
Hmm, sounds like somebody out there is just desperate for an explanation. And I'm sure that EVERY SINGLE CROP CIRCLE is right next to a poppy field.
He didn't say that was the source of all crop circles. Pranksters probably make more than wallabies.
 

Beefcakes

Pants Lord of Vodka
Aug 11, 2008
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I want a video
It may sound cruel, but dammit I'd laugh
Those Wallabies are all right...

Or, maybe the poppy seeds are of another planet and are influencing the Wallabies to make the circles!
RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!
Or maybe the wallabies are aliens, and survive of poppy seeds for sustenance?
RUN FOR YOUR LIVES IN A DIFFERENT DIRECTION!
 

Chipperz

New member
Apr 27, 2009
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Beefcakes said:
I want a video
It may sound cruel, but dammit I'd laugh
Those Wallabies are all right...
You and me both!

Wallabies are awesome, and the fact they get stoned and make crop circles has just increased their awesomeness exponentially :p