90s Video Condemns Ninja Turtles' Heathen Ways

[vansau]

90s Video Condemns Ninja Turtles' Heathen Ways

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Fruit snacks weren't the worst thing tied to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon. It was the show's association with the Devil was (or so a 1990s video claimed).

In the 1990s, there were few franchises that were bigger than the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. The cartoon spawned all sorts of toys, food products, and clothing. However, a video has appeared on the Web showcasing how the Turtles were actually trying to seduce kids and drag them down to hell with their ninja hijinks and ... uh ... promotion of sorcery? It's all a bit nonsensical, but it's also pretty dang funny.

The video is composed of highlights from a 1990s video called "Not Just Fun and Games," which was spliced together by Rich Juzwiak and placed on his blog. Here are some of the best parts from the four minutes of footage:

? The panel accuses toys and cartoons of "evangelizing" children with Hinduism, Occultism, and Humanism.
? "You heard it here first, folks, a rat named 'Splinter' is the hero of this cartoon."
? It's revealed that ninjas were assassins and "not good people."
? <a href=http://boardgamegeek.com/boardgame/699/heroquest>HeroQuest is "witchcraft!"

Details about the background of this straight-to-video evangelical production are pretty sparse, but here's what I was able to glean: This was made by a Canadian Christian group back when Michael Jackson, MC Hammer and Vanilla Ice were still cool. Based on that (and the awesome mullet one of the talking heads is rocking), it seems safe to assume that the video was released sometime between 1990 and 1992.

Do you know anything about this video or the group that produced it? If you know do, <a href=http://www.twitter.com/vansau>drop me a line.

Source: <a href=http://fourfour.typepad.com/fourfour/2012/01/down-with-teenage-mutant-ninja-turtles.html>FourFour via <a href=http://www.geeksaresexy.net/2012/01/17/ninja-turtles-fans-are-going-straight-to-hell-video>Geeks Are Sexy

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[RandallJohn]

Uch, why is it you always hear about the nutjob Christians and not the cool ones?

I'm a Christian, and organizations like this really piss me off. You can squeeze any message out of any product if you're trying hard enough.

(Also, according to the Nostalgia Critic, the worst thing to come out of TMNT was Ninja Turtle Pies. ^_^)

 

[Orange12345]

Well at least now kids are enjoying wholesome activities like gunning down hordes of Muslim extremists in COD.

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

Uch, why is it you always hear about the nutjob Christians and not the cool ones?

Because you guys don't do anything newsworthy. You just go through life and do your own thing. Just like the rest of us who aren't nutjobs, psychopaths or publicity hounds.

 

[Zhukov]

Ah Christianity, where do you find these people?

At least you're reliably good for a laugh.

 

[antipunt]

I'm an atheist, but still, I think this is more of an older generation vs younger generation thing. In other words, there's always a group of ol'foggies that are afraid of change. That's why people become increasingly conservative as they get older, on average. Also conversely, a lot of young 'uns start out liberal.

But anyways, I think religion is being used as a 'weapon' here to curb parents' fears of change. It happened in the 90s with the ninja turtles. Then it was the sexual revolution. Then it was (is) gays/lesbians. It's always something!

And yes, a lot of Christians are conservative by nature/teaching. But there are liberal Christians too, and I think those are the ones that facepalm at the whole 'gay = evil' schtick

 

[Treblaine]

? It's revealed that ninjas were assassins and "not good people."

And as we all know Christians are pacifists and no where in the religion is there ever a divine endorsement or excuse for violence or malicious harm...

... Wait.

Except he whole "gays are an abomination and should be stoned to death" thing and the wars and summary executions.

I'm not saying Christianity is a bad religion (well, the gay-lynching is pretty inexcusable), the US constitution and other codes of creed stipulate violence for certain causes. Just that these guys are being hypocrites. These ninjas fight for the same values, just without Jehova/Yahweh/God-with-a-capital-G's (supposed) permission.

They are just being arbitrary forbidding sorcery, what is the difference between "sorcery" and "biblical miracles"? The latter is "good" because it has the stamp of approval from the Christian camp and if it doesn't have their approval for their narrow beliefs then it's "bad" even if it fights for the same fundamental principals (stopping thieves and murderers).

 

[Anon314]

Uch, why is it you always hear about the nutjob Christians and not the cool ones?

Because you guys don't do anything newsworthy. You just go through life and do your own thing. Just like the rest of us who aren't nutjobs, psychopaths or publicity hounds.

Yep, Paul actually tells Christians to live this way.

and to aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we instructed you, so that you may walk properly before outsiders and be dependent on no one.
(1 Thessalonians 4:11-12 ESV)

OT:

Christians like this seem to practice really poor discernment...and they are still around today, I would say a lot of the so called "conservative Christians" that like to talk about immorality leading to the destruction of the US are the ideological ancestors of this line of thinking.

These people even talk about M.C. Hammer "claiming to be a Christian" but imply he is a bad roll model that should not be emulated...but the guy, I am pretty sure, is pretty involved in Christianity these days (at least according to wikipedia).

The whole "magic" argument is really silly too, I remember the churches I grew up in being all up in arms about fantasy magic being evil. Tolkien wrote about magic in The Lord of the Rings, that guy was a Christian... C.S. Lewis used magic a ton in The Chronicles of Narnia series, and I would love to see one of these guys argue Lewis was not really a Christian...

These guys just got caught up in their own moral-ism...they seem very similar to certain pharisees in a certain book...

 

[Torrasque]

Uch, why is it you always hear about the nutjob Christians and not the cool ones?

Because you guys don't do anything newsworthy. You just go through life and do your own thing. Just like the rest of us who aren't nutjobs, psychopaths or publicity hounds.

Yep, Paul actually tells Christians to live this way.

and to aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we instructed you, so that you may walk properly before outsiders and be dependent on no one.
(1 Thessalonians 4:11-12 ESV)

I thought that was one of the main tenants of Christianity: don't make a big deal about your faith since it is your faith. Seems to me that more Christians--including the main body of the church--do nothing but make big deals about their faith.

OT: I'm still waiting for a video of someone going on about how MLP:FiM is the most sacrilegious thing ever.

 

[Redd the Sock]

Well, technically he is right that a lot of historical ninja practices weren't things easially labeled as actions of "the good guys" in 80s terms. I'm sure that's an accident though 'cause the rest is bunk.

Sadly, there've been idiots like this for decades. It's been music, comics, TV, movies, D&D, video games, Harry Potter, all sorts of fantasy worlds that "promote unchristian values". The counter arguements is: so What? Is every entertainment outlet required to promote christian values? Are Christians so poor in promoting their values that they need to censor differing views to keep the religion alive? If anything, the censoring of differing viewpoints sounds a lot more like indoctination. At least none of the above tries to silence the church.

 

[RJ 17]

Anyone else notice how Mr. Half-Mullet changes the story? "There were two little boys, one 5 and one 8..." two sentences later "There were three little boys, two were 5, one was 8." Reminds me of an infomercial for an air matress that could inflate in 45 seconds or less. After one demonstration in which said matress had been inflated, the guy looks at a non-existent watch on&#65279; his wrist and says "Wow! That was under 45 seconds!"

And seriously...what's the guy's problem with Splinter? "The hero of this show is a rat named Splinter......he's a rat....name Splinter....and he's the hero of the show." As if that has any significance to their point whatsoever...unless the guy just doesn't like rats.

Annnnnnnnnd I don't recall Bebop using Dark Sider force powers while the turtles fought him with Eastern-based Light Sider force powers.

AND GOOD GOD! THEY'RE USING FUCKING NUNCHUCKS (yes, I know that's not the proper spelling )?! TWO WOODEN STICKS BOUND BY A LEATHER STRAP IS THE WEAPON OF THE ANTI-CHRIST! THEY'RE ILLEGAL IN CANADA FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!

 

[Fasckira]

Meh, I dont find videos like these funny anymore, I just find them depressing. At best I feel pity for the guys because they're not actually trying to be morons, they actually believe what they're saying and thats a lot worse.

 

[Akimoto]

Uch, why is it you always hear about the nutjob Christians and not the cool ones?

I'm a Christian, and organizations like this really piss me off. You can squeeze any message out of any product if you're trying hard enough.

(Also, according to the Nostalgia Critic, the worst thing to come out of TMNT was Ninja Turtle Pies. ^_^)

Remember Pokemon? Same stuff happened. My reaction was to buy a Game Boy Advance and play the heck out of Red. LOTR also had the same response and my dad actually walked out of the first movie and has never read the book. At least he let's us decide for ourselves. Oh, don't forget Harry Potter, which was actually a jolly good ride.

The best thing that came out of TMNT was the homemade blanket my mum made for me. Still have it.

OT: hehehe....

 

[RandallJohn]

Uch, why is it you always hear about the nutjob Christians and not the cool ones?

I'm a Christian, and organizations like this really piss me off. You can squeeze any message out of any product if you're trying hard enough.

(Also, according to the Nostalgia Critic, the worst thing to come out of TMNT was Ninja Turtle Pies. ^_^)

Remember Pokemon? Same stuff happened. My reaction was to buy a Game Boy Advance and play the heck out of Red. LOTR also had the same response and my dad actually walked out of the first movie and has never read the book. At least he let's us decide for ourselves. Oh, don't forget Harry Potter, which was actually a jolly good ride.

The best thing that came out of TMNT was the homemade blanket my mum made for me. Still have it.

OT: hehehe....

Oh, goodness, I remember some group even claimed that the font used in Harry Potter was somehow evil or something. Good times.

 

[Owyn_Merrilin]

I can't seem to find much about this specific VHS tape, but there's a name that might lead to some information for anyone who is interested in getting to the bottom of this: Phil Phillips. He wrote this book in the 80's called "Turmoil in the Toybox," and if he didn't write the script to that VHS tape, whoever did read his book. I've got a copy of it sitting next to me, and it's one of those things that even as a Christian, I can't read it as anything but a comedy piece. This is a very specific brand of crazy, one that even the fundies don't usually hit.

 

[ED-Tw0 ZeRo N9nE]

As an atheist, I happen to agree with everything said in this vid. In a sence, they were sort of predicting the future, they just happened to be powerless to stop it. It's no secret that there has been a HUGE drop in their numbers in these last twenty years. More and more people are becoming disillusioned with the church as the years go by, this is a good thing. I subscribe to the notion that Atheism NEEDS religion to exist in order to stay relevant. Otherwise people will most likely invent something else to worship (Scientology *Shudder*), but that doesn't mean they don't still have far, far, FAR too much power in the US. So yeah, having grown up in that time period, all of those toys/cartoons/boardgames probably DID play their part in disillusioning people, especially my generation/ the ones after. This is the natural progression as society advances, and the ONLY thing that will stop it is a total collapse of society itself. Let's not allow that to happen.

{EDIT} To be clear, I don't hate the religious, I actually know several whom I respect. I'm just not a fan of the fanatics/fundamentalists. Those who can perservere through this transition with their faiths intact will be better people because of it.

 

[Scarim Coral]

Ah you got to love the 90's!
It make me wonder what they are doing now in this present day? I want to see their reactions given that what they had all said in that video were all for nothing!! They must had a fit when they saw the Ninja Turtle remake and it being popular. Yet again I can easly see them being in the whole violence games= violence childrens.

 

[Chewster]

I grew up in a somewhat fundamentalist Christian household and this sort of rhetoric doesn't surprise me in the least. Much of what I was taught in church revolved around how wicked the world outside was and how "worldly" (a word that got used a lot) endeavors were evil because they didn't glorify God and so on, in that manner. We were especially warned about heavy metal, rap and Ouija Boards.

I wasn't really allowed to watch a lot of kids television as a result, though I think that had a lot to do with how violent these (and other) cartoons were, more than anything. As a result, I'm not a very aggressive adult, so I guess it turned out alright, even if I've more or less rejected all of those beliefs.