300 Ninjas RPG

[ZlagarX]

This is an awesome forum RPG that is awesome. Reeply to do something. Duh.

You are walking into a cave (No real reason, just caves are cool) when you are jumped by 300 ninjas. These ninjas are all carrying Katanas and are prepared to kill you if it's the last thing they do. You are armed with a 2 ft. stick and a small can of tuna. What do you do?

HINT: The key to get much WIN in this game is to think of the second least logical thing to do, and do it.

I break the stick in two, tare of some strings from my clothing, rube som tuna oil in the two pices of stick, bend the sticks, then I creat a violin by tying the strings to the bent sticks. With this mighty weapon of music, i play the first song that comes to my mind

 

[darkenergy134]

I place the torch on myself, causing my body to ignite. I scream "Flame on!" and start flying after the Ninjas.

 

[Sam G]

Spear a ninja through the eye with the stick and wield him as a ninja-stick-spear.
Also, throw the tuna into the middle of the crowd to distract them with the promise of delicious fish.

The Ninja drops his Katana, and you see a map fall out of his pocket. The Ninjas, upon seeing the delicious tuna, go into a delicious-seizure and die instantly.
What do you do?

I'll create a spark using the katana and empty tuna tin, ignite the map, and use that flame to cremate all the ninjas.

It seems that the Ninjas have fire-proof Ninja suits.
Suddenly, an AK-47 appears in your hand. (Thanks to the wonders of random matter generation.)
What do you do?

I notice a low-flying plane, and shoot at it with the AK to get the pilot's attention.

 

[SpaceSpork]

The Ninjas shout "Tally-Ho!", run off, and destroy Wal-Mart. You are a bit sad, because that's where you get your DVDs. Oh well. One of the Ninjas seems to have dropped a pocketbook out of their pocket, though. . . .
The 300 Ninjas RPG Walkthrough. . . .
What do you do?

I pick up the RPG Walkthrough and stare at it intently. What can it mean? Wait...it means the reality I'm in now must be an RPG!
"Aha!" I declare. "I shall enter the Konami Code [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Konami_Code]!"
I jump twice, duck twice, step left, then right, then left and right again, then shout "B! A!" at the top of my lungs.

Suddenly, a Hobgoblin appears out of nowhere. "Hello! I have come to aid you on your quest to defeat the evil monster, Behemoth, as it is said in the RPG prophecy!"
What do you do?

 

[SpaceSpork]

Do a slapstick routine with the stick and randomly throw Tuna at the ninja's

All the Ninjas are surprised because of this tuna throwage, and are instantly defeated. Suddenly, Roger Ebert comes out of nowhere and says, "The slapstick routine was okay. I give it 3.5 stars out of 5."
What do you do?

i thank him for the reasonable score then walk past him.

You begin to walk on into the darkness, when Roger Ebert stops you. "Wait," He says. "I've always wanted to be in a video game. Can I join your party? I can shoot lazers from my thumb!"
What do you do?

 

[SpaceSpork]

This is an awesome forum RPG that is awesome. Reeply to do something. Duh.

You are walking into a cave (No real reason, just caves are cool) when you are jumped by 300 ninjas. These ninjas are all carrying Katanas and are prepared to kill you if it's the last thing they do. You are armed with a 2 ft. stick and a small can of tuna. What do you do?

HINT: The key to get much WIN in this game is to think of the second least logical thing to do, and do it.

I break the stick in two, tare of some strings from my clothing, rube som tuna oil in the two pices of stick, bend the sticks, then I creat a violin by tying the strings to the bent sticks. With this mighty weapon of music, i play the first song that comes to my mind

You play "Livin' On A Prayer" By Bon Jovi. The Ninjas applaud wildly. "We will follow you as your servants, wonderful bard of wonder!"
What do you do?

 

[SpaceSpork]

I place the torch on myself, causing my body to ignite. I scream "Flame on!" and start flying after the Ninjas.

The Ninjas shout "Aah! The Human Torch!" and disappear in a puff of fright, and in their place, The Thing appears. "Torchy! I been lookin' for ya! The Skrulls killed Stretch 'n Invis'ble Wom'n! Help me!"
What do you do?

 

[SpaceSpork]

Spoiler: Basically, this:

Suddenly, all the Ninjas disappear in a puff of smoke and Darth Nihilus appears in their place. "Ha ha!"
It shouts. "I got a 8.8 on my Gamestop review, while YOU only got an 8.0! I challenge you to a Pokemon battle!" He sends out Mr. T, while you have out Cthulu. Your Cthulu can use Doom and Kxnoxoph'thlnox. Which one do you use?

That 'Kxnoxoph'thlnox' word is a googlewhack

I pick DOOM, as Kxnoxoph'thlnox doesn't exist.

NOTE: Actually, Kxnoxoph'thlnox is a word in C'thulian, often abbreviated as 'Knox'thl'.

You use Doom, and Mr. T's health lowers to 185/200. He uses Fool Pity, which brings your HP to 190/210.
What do you do?

 

[ZlagarX]

This is an awesome forum RPG that is awesome. Reeply to do something. Duh.

You are walking into a cave (No real reason, just caves are cool) when you are jumped by 300 ninjas. These ninjas are all carrying Katanas and are prepared to kill you if it's the last thing they do. You are armed with a 2 ft. stick and a small can of tuna. What do you do?

HINT: The key to get much WIN in this game is to think of the second least logical thing to do, and do it.

I break the stick in two, tare of some strings from my clothing, rube som tuna oil in the two pices of stick, bend the sticks, then I creat a violin by tying the strings to the bent sticks. With this mighty weapon of music, i play the first song that comes to my mind

You play "Livin' On A Prayer" By Bon Jovi. The Ninjas applaud wildly. "We will follow you as your servants, wonderful bard of wonder!"
What do you do?

I shout "we need to make the world ours, help me cut down all forests in the world and make a ladder to the moon, then steel all the worlds nuks and bring them to the moon!!"

 

[SpaceSpork]

This is an awesome forum RPG that is awesome. Reeply to do something. Duh.

You are walking into a cave (No real reason, just caves are cool) when you are jumped by 300 ninjas. These ninjas are all carrying Katanas and are prepared to kill you if it's the last thing they do. You are armed with a 2 ft. stick and a small can of tuna. What do you do?

HINT: The key to get much WIN in this game is to think of the second least logical thing to do, and do it.

I break the stick in two, tare of some strings from my clothing, rube som tuna oil in the two pices of stick, bend the sticks, then I creat a violin by tying the strings to the bent sticks. With this mighty weapon of music, i play the first song that comes to my mind

You play "Livin' On A Prayer" By Bon Jovi. The Ninjas applaud wildly. "We will follow you as your servants, wonderful bard of wonder!"
What do you do?

I shout "we need to make the world ours, help me cut down all forests in the world and make a ladder to the moon, then steel all the worlds nuks and bring them to the moon!!"

You get to the moon with a Kujillion nukes and you large army of Ninjas, when you are challenged by some random alien. "Come, bipedal being, and duel me for the title of the Moon's Most Powerful Bipedal Being!"
What do you do?

 

[SpaceSpork]

NOTE: Actually, Kxnoxoph'thlnox is a word in C'thulian, often abbreviated as 'Knox'thl'.

You use Doom, and Mr. T's health lowers to 185/200. He uses Fool Pity, which brings your HP to 190/210.
What do you do?

I search in my bag, and get out a GIANT ENEMY CRAB for massive damage.

The GIANT ENEMY CRAB jumps out of your bag and assaults Mr. T, leaving him with 1/200 HP left.
BUT WAIT!
Mr. T uses HP Switch, switching your HP with his, and his with yours!
What do you do?

 

[ZlagarX]

This is an awesome forum RPG that is awesome. Reeply to do something. Duh.

You are walking into a cave (No real reason, just caves are cool) when you are jumped by 300 ninjas. These ninjas are all carrying Katanas and are prepared to kill you if it's the last thing they do. You are armed with a 2 ft. stick and a small can of tuna. What do you do?

HINT: The key to get much WIN in this game is to think of the second least logical thing to do, and do it.

I break the stick in two, tare of some strings from my clothing, rube som tuna oil in the two pices of stick, bend the sticks, then I creat a violin by tying the strings to the bent sticks. With this mighty weapon of music, i play the first song that comes to my mind

You play "Livin' On A Prayer" By Bon Jovi. The Ninjas applaud wildly. "We will follow you as your servants, wonderful bard of wonder!"
What do you do?

I shout "we need to make the world ours, help me cut down all forests in the world and make a ladder to the moon, then steel all the worlds nuks and bring them to the moon!!"

You get to the moon with a Kujillion nukes and you large army of Ninjas, when you are challenged by some random alien. "Come, bipedal being, and duel me for the title of the Moon's Most Powerful Bipedal Being!"
What do you do?

First I tell my ninjas to take al the trees for the ladder and build a huge arena, and then throw in som ocasional traps for my alien opponent, and then I bait all the traps with my left over tuna hoping that the smell will draw the alien to them and kill him.

 

[SpaceSpork]

This is an awesome forum RPG that is awesome. Reeply to do something. Duh.

You are walking into a cave (No real reason, just caves are cool) when you are jumped by 300 ninjas. These ninjas are all carrying Katanas and are prepared to kill you if it's the last thing they do. You are armed with a 2 ft. stick and a small can of tuna. What do you do?

HINT: The key to get much WIN in this game is to think of the second least logical thing to do, and do it.

I break the stick in two, tare of some strings from my clothing, rube som tuna oil in the two pices of stick, bend the sticks, then I creat a violin by tying the strings to the bent sticks. With this mighty weapon of music, i play the first song that comes to my mind

You play "Livin' On A Prayer" By Bon Jovi. The Ninjas applaud wildly. "We will follow you as your servants, wonderful bard of wonder!"
What do you do?

I shout "we need to make the world ours, help me cut down all forests in the world and make a ladder to the moon, then steel all the worlds nuks and bring them to the moon!!"

You get to the moon with a Kujillion nukes and you large army of Ninjas, when you are challenged by some random alien. "Come, bipedal being, and duel me for the title of the Moon's Most Powerful Bipedal Being!"
What do you do?

First I tell my ninjas to take al the trees for the ladder and build a huge arena, and then throw in som ocasional traps for my alien opponent, and then I bait all the traps with my left over tuna hoping that the smell will draw the alien to them and kill him.

Your traps quickly work, and the alien, who reveals his name as Glnork, gives you the medal, deeming you 'The Moon's Most Powerful Bipedal Being'!

THE END
You may do one thing before you ascend to heaven.

 

[ravensshade]

i ask him to shoow him the power then let him join me

 

[ZlagarX]

This is an awesome forum RPG that is awesome. Reeply to do something. Duh.

You are walking into a cave (No real reason, just caves are cool) when you are jumped by 300 ninjas. These ninjas are all carrying Katanas and are prepared to kill you if it's the last thing they do. You are armed with a 2 ft. stick and a small can of tuna. What do you do?

HINT: The key to get much WIN in this game is to think of the second least logical thing to do, and do it.

I break the stick in two, tare of some strings from my clothing, rube som tuna oil in the two pices of stick, bend the sticks, then I creat a violin by tying the strings to the bent sticks. With this mighty weapon of music, i play the first song that comes to my mind

You play "Livin' On A Prayer" By Bon Jovi. The Ninjas applaud wildly. "We will follow you as your servants, wonderful bard of wonder!"
What do you do?

I shout "we need to make the world ours, help me cut down all forests in the world and make a ladder to the moon, then steel all the worlds nuks and bring them to the moon!!"

You get to the moon with a Kujillion nukes and you large army of Ninjas, when you are challenged by some random alien. "Come, bipedal being, and duel me for the title of the Moon's Most Powerful Bipedal Being!"
What do you do?

First I tell my ninjas to take al the trees for the ladder and build a huge arena, and then throw in som ocasional traps for my alien opponent, and then I bait all the traps with my left over tuna hoping that the smell will draw the alien to them and kill him.

Your traps quickly work, and the alien, who reveals his name as Glnork, gives you the medal, deeming you 'The Moon's Most Powerful Bipedal Being'!

THE END
You may do one thing before you ascend to heaven.

I use the tre left over from the arena to create a giant megafon, and with it I play a song of hypnosis with my voilon, and hypnotise the earth to convert to a religon based on me as their god!

 

[SpaceSpork]

This is an awesome forum RPG that is awesome. Reeply to do something. Duh.

You are walking into a cave (No real reason, just caves are cool) when you are jumped by 300 ninjas. These ninjas are all carrying Katanas and are prepared to kill you if it's the last thing they do. You are armed with a 2 ft. stick and a small can of tuna. What do you do?

HINT: The key to get much WIN in this game is to think of the second least logical thing to do, and do it.

I break the stick in two, tare of some strings from my clothing, rube som tuna oil in the two pices of stick, bend the sticks, then I creat a violin by tying the strings to the bent sticks. With this mighty weapon of music, i play the first song that comes to my mind

You play "Livin' On A Prayer" By Bon Jovi. The Ninjas applaud wildly. "We will follow you as your servants, wonderful bard of wonder!"
What do you do?

I shout "we need to make the world ours, help me cut down all forests in the world and make a ladder to the moon, then steel all the worlds nuks and bring them to the moon!!"

You get to the moon with a Kujillion nukes and you large army of Ninjas, when you are challenged by some random alien. "Come, bipedal being, and duel me for the title of the Moon's Most Powerful Bipedal Being!"
What do you do?

First I tell my ninjas to take al the trees for the ladder and build a huge arena, and then throw in som ocasional traps for my alien opponent, and then I bait all the traps with my left over tuna hoping that the smell will draw the alien to them and kill him.

Your traps quickly work, and the alien, who reveals his name as Glnork, gives you the medal, deeming you 'The Moon's Most Powerful Bipedal Being'!

THE END
You may do one thing before you ascend to heaven.

I use the tre left over from the arena to create a giant megafon, and with it I play a song of hypnosis with my voilon, and hypnotise the earth to convert to a religon based on me as their god!

THE END

Legacy:
Every living thing on earth is now sentient, bipedal, and considers themselves to be of the religion Zlagarist. I hope you're happy.

RP CLOSED.
If you want more spacepg-roleplay-y goodness, go over here: http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/362.157903

 

[lodo_bear]

Suddenly, a Hobgoblin appears out of nowhere. "Hello! I have come to aid you on your quest to defeat the evil monster, Behemoth, as it is said in the RPG prophecy!"
What do you do?

I reply, "I require more knowledge if I am to defeat this monster. To gain this knowledge, I must travel to the source of all knowledge. Take me to the magical kingdom of Wiki!"

 

[SpaceSpork]

Suddenly, a Hobgoblin appears out of nowhere. "Hello! I have come to aid you on your quest to defeat the evil monster, Behemoth, as it is said in the RPG prophecy!"
What do you do?

I reply, "I require more knowledge if I am to defeat this monster. To gain this knowledge, I must travel to the source of all knowledge. Take me to the magical kingdom of Wiki!"

Hello? RP CLOSED!

 

[lodo_bear]

Suddenly, a Hobgoblin appears out of nowhere. "Hello! I have come to aid you on your quest to defeat the evil monster, Behemoth, as it is said in the RPG prophecy!"
What do you do?

I reply, "I require more knowledge if I am to defeat this monster. To gain this knowledge, I must travel to the source of all knowledge. Take me to the magical kingdom of Wiki!"

Hello? RP CLOSED!

My bad. Sorry about that.

 

[SpaceSpork]

Suddenly, a Hobgoblin appears out of nowhere. "Hello! I have come to aid you on your quest to defeat the evil monster, Behemoth, as it is said in the RPG prophecy!"
What do you do?

I reply, "I require more knowledge if I am to defeat this monster. To gain this knowledge, I must travel to the source of all knowledge. Take me to the magical kingdom of Wiki!"

Hello? RP CLOSED!

My bad. Sorry about that.

S'okay!