What Your Obnoxious Profile Pictures Say About You

The Wooster

King Snap
Jul 15, 2008
15,305
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What Your Obnoxious Profile Pictures Say About You


A recent survey details exactly what not to have in your online profile pictures if you don't want people to automatically hate you.

Surprise! It turns out people are just as shallow and endlessly judgmental on the internet than they are in real life. According to a study by Online Reputation management firm Reputation 24/7, [http://www.reputation247.com/] it takes the average person just five and a half minutes to judge a fellow human being by his or her online profile, compared to the nine and a half minutes it takes in real life.

If you want people to like you, or at least not end up hating everything about you within 60 seconds of opening your picture gallery, you should avoid uploading pictures that contain: cars, boobs, rude gestures, angry facial expressions, alcoholic beverages, hugs, Photoshopped elements - seriously, no one likes those lens flares - and cartoon characters. Subjects more likely to invoke a positive response are: sensible-looking friends, wedding photos, pictures of children (hopefully yours) and shots taken on a beach, though that might clash with the "no boobs" rule. Smiling is good too.

As old and grumpy as the survey respondents may seem, it's sound advice. In an age where any potential employer can type your name into Google and come back with a terrifying amount of information, perhaps updating your Facebook profile with that picture of yourself in blackface doing a keg stand at last year's Halloween party isn't all that wise.

Source: The Mail Online [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2057848/Dont-post-bikini-pictures-posey-pictures-Facebook-want-make-friends-online-say-researchers.html]


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TitanAtlas

New member
Oct 14, 2010
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But what about my main picture beeing me between naked blonde twins, hugging them, while drinking vodka, all sitting on top of a car (with lens flare effects), doing gang gestures with a extremely angry face?

Awwww man.... i screwed in every aspect D:
 

LavaLampBamboo

King of Okay
Jun 27, 2008
764
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You see this is why I like having the same name as a famous historical figure. You type my name into Goolge, you will literally NEVER find me, unless you are really committed.
 

The Wooster

King Snap
Jul 15, 2008
15,305
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LavaLampBamboo said:
You see this is why I like having the same name as a famous historical figure. You type my name into Goolge, you will literally NEVER find me, unless you are really committed.
Yeah, but I can see there being some downsides, Adolf.
 

Richardplex

New member
Jun 22, 2011
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This is my only picture. So I guess all they get from me is that I like boxes? Is that a positive or negative impression?
 

Abedeus

New member
Sep 14, 2008
7,412
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TitanAtlas said:
But what about my main picture beeing me between naked blonde twins, hugging them, while drinking vodka, all sitting on top of a car (with lens flare effects), doing gang gestures with a extremely angry face?

Awwww man.... i screwed in every aspect D:
Hugging is negated by the twin blondes, drinking vodka is being negated by car with lens flares and the angry face negates gang gestures.


Also, what is the general consensus about bearded guys doing pictures with their 50kg rottweilers in their arms? Is that like positive in the "aw cute doggie" way or "zomg wtf is that beast doing help that poor guy" way?
 

LavaLampBamboo

King of Okay
Jun 27, 2008
764
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Grey Carter said:
LavaLampBamboo said:
You see this is why I like having the same name as a famous historical figure. You type my name into Goolge, you will literally NEVER find me, unless you are really committed.
Yeah, but I can see there being some downsides, Adolf.
You'd be surprised, it's quite a hit with the ladies.
 

Dango

New member
Feb 11, 2010
21,066
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Abedeus said:
Also, what is the general consensus about bearded guys doing pictures with their 50kg rottweilers in their arms? Is that like positive in the "aw cute doggie" way or "zomg wtf is that beast doing help that poor guy" way?
It depends on your facial expression, but probably a bit of both.

Also, why are people against hugs?
 

Greni

New member
Jun 19, 2011
286
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TitanAtlas said:
But what about my main picture beeing me between naked blonde twins, hugging them, while drinking vodka, all sitting on top of a car (with lens flare effects), doing gang gestures with a extremely angry face?

Awwww man.... i screwed in every aspect D:
So what you are saying is that rappers are really screwed in the profile picture department?
 

Hungry Donner

Henchman
Mar 19, 2009
1,369
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LavaLampBamboo said:
You see this is why I like having the same name as a famous historical figure. You type my name into Goolge, you will literally NEVER find me, unless you are really committed.
Wikipedia has two separate entries for people who share my name, although it hasn't reached "disambiguation page" level of commonality yet.

There are hundreds of people on Facebook with my name, and potential employers are going to be hard pressed to find me if they snoop around.

As for my facebook pic, it's me and my son, pretty understated.
 

GeorgW

ALL GLORY TO ME!
Aug 27, 2010
4,806
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So Hypnotoad is bad?
*evil grin* Good. *evil grin*

I don't have FB, so I'll go by my avatar here. Given how many cartoon avatars there are around here, apparently we're all assholes.
 

Xanthious

New member
Dec 25, 2008
1,273
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GeorgW said:
So Hypnotoad is bad?
*evil grin* Good. *evil grin*

I don't have FB, so I'll go by my avatar here. Given how many cartoon avatars there are around here, apparently we're all assholes.
Well I'm glad you said it and not me. . . =P
 

schiz0phren1c

New member
Jan 17, 2008
151
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Wow,
seems like every other thread is about profile pics lately,
lol I guess that explains why most people don't argue with me then...(most of my profile pics are me with guns,or my biker mates...or both :),
and anyone who's dumb enough to still judge me by that is welcome to excuse themselves out of my life.
 

Z of the Na'vi

Born with one kidney.
Apr 27, 2009
5,034
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DVS BSTrD said:
No boobs (unless they're your own...and you're a chick)
: /

So, I'm not allowed to express my fandom for a video game character just because I am male and she is female?

...I'm not quite sure what to say.

For what it is worth, I do have a real picture of myself back on my profile page...
 

RedEyesBlackGamer

The Killjoy Detective returns!
Jan 23, 2011
4,701
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I guess that I'm secretly reviled then. I exclusively use animated pictures, usually ponies.