A Genie comes to you and gives you three wishes. What do you wish for?

WolfThomas

Man must have a code.
Dec 21, 2007
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Well. First I'm going weigh every last word I say. So nothing can be accidentally misinterpretation as a wish ironically.

Wish 1

Then I'm going to ask a number of questions about the nature of being genie, his limits to his ability, his chance of ironically screwing me over, how truthful he will be ectera.

If necessarily I will burn a wish on getting him to answer ever last question truthfully, constructively and not screw me over ironically (seriously this is my biggest fear).

Wish 2

With that in mind I'm going to wish for some sort of perfectly phrased reality-manipulating practically a god superpower if possible, which will fulfil all my needs and desires.

Wish 3

Lastly I'm going to find out what happens if you actually free a genie. Some stories you have to actually wish them back into the bottle with your last wish to stop them going on a rampage. If that's the case I use my last wish to seal them back up. If they are benign and will just disappearance off into some sort of fifth dimension I wish him free so no one can use him against me.
 

twistedmic

Elite Member
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Sep 8, 2009
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Aside from the near obligatory "more genies" or "I wish I could wish for more wishes" wishes, my first wish would be for the following songs to be erased from all living history across all possible dimensions and timelines- 'Achy Breaky Heart', 'My Heart Will Go On' and 'Barbie Girl'.
My second wish would be that 'Eternal Darkness' got a good sequel.
My third and final wish would be for a 1970 Chevy Chevelle SS that never ran out of gas, needed maintenance, crashed and always met the most current emissions standards.
 

Avnger

Trash Goblin
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Is this one of those good genies or one of the monkeypaw-esque asshole ones?
 

Frankster

Space Ace
Mar 13, 2009
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Silent Protagonist said:
Edit: I realized some people might not enjoy me picking apart wishes(which I see as 90% of the fun in these kinds of discussions) so I'm going to try to stop doing that for now
For what it's worth i didn't mind at all xD

If anything it's best i figure out the wording of my wishes now so if the time ever comes when i do get in this situation, i don't screw myself over.

Wishing for wisdom in its gentlest form for example is one way of wording a wish to be super smart without having your brain exploding due to suddenly being filled with too much information, or info that is simply not meant for a mortal mind.

So for the custom designed spaceship i figured my first wish would help with that, but maybe not :S Would have to think about the wording more or sod it, directly wish for a prebuilt ship that is totally compatible with us humans as we are know and which operates fine within our laws of physics.
 

Arnoxthe1

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Dec 25, 2010
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1. Youthful immortality

2. The ability to, at any time or place, traverse to another universe and place in it that I desire

3. FULL control over my own mind at all times

That should literally in a little roundabout way make me a demigod of sorts.
 

Vausch

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Dec 7, 2009
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thejboy88 said:
Title says it all. You get a Genie, and three wishes. What do you wish for? And just so we have SOME rules here, let's stick with Disney Aladdin Genies laws. No killing, no making people fall in love, no bringing people back from the dead, and no wishing for more wishes.
Let's see...

I wish that each wish be considered separately.

I wish that wishes were calculated in absolute value.

I wish for 1 million fewer wishes.

Now for the fun stuff!
 

Lufia Erim

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Mar 13, 2015
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A) the ability to stop and resume time at will.
B) the ability to read specific peoples thoughts at will.
C) Charisma. I got none of that and boy do i need it.
 

Vanilla ISIS

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Dec 14, 2015
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I would wish for a power to transmit my memories to my past self, kind of like in Edge of Tomorrow but without any limitations.
I would be able to live my life in any way I want and if it doesn't work out, I could just go back to the past and repeat it without making the previous mistakes.
I could also go back to the time when I met the genie and ask for something else, experiment with the other 2 wishes as many times as I want.
 

Dan Steele

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Jul 30, 2010
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I would wish for the destruction of human greed: the most destructive and detrimental flaw of humanity

I would wish to live a full and successful happy life here: then upon dieing being reborn into a universe of my creation

Then I would wish for the genie's freedom.
 

LysanderNemoinis

Noble and oppressed Kekistani
Nov 8, 2010
468
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First wish, the religion of Islam never existed.

Second wish, the theory of communism/socialism never existed.

Third wish, a Coke.

You're welcome, hundreds of millions of people who are now alive because they weren't killed by those awful things.
 

Mr.Mattress

Level 2 Lumberjack
Jul 17, 2009
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a) Remove my Diabetes; make it so that I never ever had it.

b) Legally guarantee me the Presidency in 2032 and 2036.

I'll hold onto c) for a while, just in case something really nasty happens to me at some point.
 

Addendum_Forthcoming

Queen of the Edit
Feb 4, 2009
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I'd wish for a universe (my universe) where genies don't grant wishes because no one is going to use that power responsibly.

Plus I don't like the idea of meddlesome gods. Nip that problem in the bud right then and there.
 

lacktheknack

Je suis joined jewels.
Jan 19, 2009
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My mom to not have cancer anymore.

Better motivation.

Go free, sweet genie.

If it's not the freeing sort of genie, then I'd ask it to get rid of all my junk I'm trying to sell or dispose of. Such a hassle.
 

Sniper Team 4

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Apr 28, 2010
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Enough money that I would never have to worry about money ever again. I'm talking like Bill Gates level of wealth here. Because by having that much, I could fulfill a lot of my other wishes, such as my own house, buying homes for my friends, helping rescue shelters, paying off hospital bills for struggling families, making sure schools had a decent budget to work with...so many things I would do if I have insane amounts of money.

Anyway, the next one would be the ability to use The Force. Why The Force? Because it grants you pretty much every other power. You can even fly with it, or at least levitate yourself, so yeah. Sign me up for Force powers, thank you.

Finally, probably the ability to heal anything. I don't mean for myself (although I would throw that in), but for other people. Lost your arm or leg in an explosion? I can restore it. Terminal disease? Gone. Metal disorder? Healed.
I would, of course, charge for this service not because I need the money, but because I would have the money used to help others. And it would greatly depend on the type of person asking to be healed. A little boy, with his parents at their wits end trying to cover his cancer treatment? Ten bucks. A millionaire who has spent his entire life stepping on other people and just being jerk? I'll take 80% of your entire value, thank you. Am I now playing God? You bet, but it's my wish, and since I already have enough money that I don't need to worry about it, I won't have to worry about getting greedy and will stick to using that money to help others.
 

ghostrider9876

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Aug 5, 2011
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Well...

Number 1: Unquestionably, the ability to transform myself or anyone else in any way I want, as many times as I want. I could make tons of money with surgery-free cosmetic alteration and indulging people's weird fetishes (including my own, not judging) and could effectively grant immortality and freedom from disease to myself or anyone I wished.

Number 2: For there to be multiple parallel universes that would never suffer heat death or any other permanent destruction, and reincarnation between them; in the event *I* got killed, my reincarnation would gain access to and knowledge of my powers upon reaching age 21.

Uhh...well, that takes care of almost anything I could ever want...umm...oh! I know!

Number 3: A working TARDIS that would never break down or otherwise require maintenance, and that I could summon to any location at any time.
 

vashthblackseed

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Mar 31, 2011
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[1] Starting with this wish, all wishes granted to me are as I intend, no matter how poorly or incompletely I communicate the wish. (Looking at you Jafar.)

[2] The power to endlessly at will summon/dismiss a truly perfect copy of anything/one from any form of media either real or fictional. Said copy possess all the knowledge, memories, skills and powers attributed to the original up to the point in which I summoned. (Want to met someone famous; done. Need some cash; watch a movie/show with a bank robbery. Want a light-saber; what color? Think you're getting too old; here's some water from the Fountain of Youth.)

[3] The instant before my death, my conscious is sent back 24 hours to merge with my "younger" self unless I utter the entirety of the Fuzzy Wuzzy rhyme within a minute of death.
 

cthulhuspawn82

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Oct 16, 2011
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I only know that my first wish would be to have knowledge of the most advantageous way to use my other two wishes.
 

ghostrider9876

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Aug 5, 2011
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vashthblackseed said:
[2] The power to endlessly at will summon/dismiss a truly perfect copy of anything/one from any form of media either real or fictional. Said copy possess all the knowledge, memories, skills and powers attributed to the original up to the point in which I summoned. (Want to met someone famous; done. Need some cash; watch a movie/show with a bank robbery. Want a light-saber; what color? Think you're getting too old; here's some water from the Fountain of Youth.)
So, essentially, you want the Golden Ticket from Last Action Hero, only entirely under the control of your will. That's a good wish, and one I'd considered before. :)