Ain't no cheatcodes in love.
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It all depends on the nature of the relationship. For me there is a difference between dating someone, and whether or not that person is my GF. I have hooked up with other girls, or gone out with other girls when I have just been dating someone, but I have never ever cheated on anyone that I considered to be my GF. With a GF/BF you make promises and comittments to one another, and in dating it's just social interaction.
For me a raeaionship is 50/50, equal all the way. It's just in some relationships certain people lose sight of that and become selfish. There is no real way of knowing you can trust someone, but in the end that is basically the whole point of trust.
For me a raeaionship is 50/50, equal all the way. It's just in some relationships certain people lose sight of that and become selfish. There is no real way of knowing you can trust someone, but in the end that is basically the whole point of trust.
Aw, I'm sorry to hear that (No, really, I am).
I think it's mostly based off of trust in each other. But, there's also paranoia coming into effect; bound to be lots of useless paranoia (in some relationships, or if you've been cheated on in the past, or if you're just plain paranoid) At least from how I see it. My first (and only) relationship failed just because of that; paranoia. No story there, I promise. Just that one little sentence which RELATES TO MY POINT, WHICH IS...
Relationships pretty much need two things: Balance and trust. Balance being it's a 50/50 thing (as the poster above me said). Otherwise, people aren't happy, and happiness is pretty much the whole point of a real relationship. Trust meaning that you trust the other to not cheat on you, or be off with someone else, or anything of the sort.
Point of this reply is... Title of the topic speaks the truth.
I think it's mostly based off of trust in each other. But, there's also paranoia coming into effect; bound to be lots of useless paranoia (in some relationships, or if you've been cheated on in the past, or if you're just plain paranoid) At least from how I see it. My first (and only) relationship failed just because of that; paranoia. No story there, I promise. Just that one little sentence which RELATES TO MY POINT, WHICH IS...
Relationships pretty much need two things: Balance and trust. Balance being it's a 50/50 thing (as the poster above me said). Otherwise, people aren't happy, and happiness is pretty much the whole point of a real relationship. Trust meaning that you trust the other to not cheat on you, or be off with someone else, or anything of the sort.
Point of this reply is... Title of the topic speaks the truth.
these are the rules i had for women when i was young
1. would I hang around with her if she didn't have a vagina
2. can i get it up with her if i wasn't drunk
Now after a divorce I want to tell you this. I was married to one of the most wonderful females on the planet, but.... because of my low critery what I never considered was, is this wonderful person compatible with me in the long term.
I'm Telling you this right now if she cheated on you this early in your realtionship she is not going to be with you in the long term. So stay friends if you want, fuck buddies if you can, but do not invest any of your real emotions into her.
1. would I hang around with her if she didn't have a vagina
2. can i get it up with her if i wasn't drunk
Now after a divorce I want to tell you this. I was married to one of the most wonderful females on the planet, but.... because of my low critery what I never considered was, is this wonderful person compatible with me in the long term.
I'm Telling you this right now if she cheated on you this early in your realtionship she is not going to be with you in the long term. So stay friends if you want, fuck buddies if you can, but do not invest any of your real emotions into her.
You win, and have recieved a jar filled with cookies. Write up a tune, I want to sing this. Like, right now.DracoSuave said:
Good rules, although number 5 could be waived once, depending on circumstances. I have never been in a relationship, but I think second chances can be allowed in some cases. At least give them a fair say before dumping them.Berethond said:
Like I said, n00b at love. But yeah, I guess that's true. And are you actually giving me advice, or Rickrolling me?Berethond said:
I'm far too traditional in my understandings of relationships, so I don't usually bother with ideas of that nature. I know that I'm far out of the mainstream and find most conversations about relationships to be largely painful and without a single moment of understanding.
I don't understand what it is to be "dating" as opposed to "committed" or any other stupid word people are now using. I do understand "hooking up" as the loosely defined relationship that it is, but that's about it. My understanding of relationships only exist within the bounds of marriage, and even then I'm stumped more times than not.
Then again, I also don't get out much, so that could be the reason for my abject ignorance.
I don't understand what it is to be "dating" as opposed to "committed" or any other stupid word people are now using. I do understand "hooking up" as the loosely defined relationship that it is, but that's about it. My understanding of relationships only exist within the bounds of marriage, and even then I'm stumped more times than not.
Then again, I also don't get out much, so that could be the reason for my abject ignorance.
Well from the sounds of things she cheated on you there wasn't a misunderstanding or anything.
The was I see it there are people who basically just want to fuck around, it's nothing more than a few sexual encounters, you're not dating and it's not cheating to sleep with someone else. The you have everything else where you are dating and you don't go messing around with other people. Thats obviously a very broad perspective way to put it but yeah something like that.
The was I see it there are people who basically just want to fuck around, it's nothing more than a few sexual encounters, you're not dating and it's not cheating to sleep with someone else. The you have everything else where you are dating and you don't go messing around with other people. Thats obviously a very broad perspective way to put it but yeah something like that.
The only girls I've ever had the chance to get with have been either:
A) Psychopathic bitches who ended up either semi-stalking me or having permanent mood swings around me. One girl only ever showed me two emotions after I turned her down: pissed off at me or horny. Sometimes a lethal combo of both.
B) Girls with the attention span of an insect. Our relationships had the same lifespan too...
Assuming a normal girl came along who had no (serious) mental issues, my rule would be simple:
1) No cheating... besides, who else would sleep with me?
2) Honesty is key, you need to be able to trust your partner.
And that's about it. I mean, there is a lot more, but the only two things I can think of that fit into the "relationship guidelines" category can be seen above. Anything else is what I look for in a girl, and that is a different topic.
A) Psychopathic bitches who ended up either semi-stalking me or having permanent mood swings around me. One girl only ever showed me two emotions after I turned her down: pissed off at me or horny. Sometimes a lethal combo of both.
B) Girls with the attention span of an insect. Our relationships had the same lifespan too...
Assuming a normal girl came along who had no (serious) mental issues, my rule would be simple:
1) No cheating... besides, who else would sleep with me?
2) Honesty is key, you need to be able to trust your partner.
And that's about it. I mean, there is a lot more, but the only two things I can think of that fit into the "relationship guidelines" category can be seen above. Anything else is what I look for in a girl, and that is a different topic.
"Roses are red violets are blue, ***** if you cheat on me I'll F@#$ING KILL YOU!"
This.
I expect my loyalty to be returned.
This.
I expect my loyalty to be returned.
I'm a lawyer-in-training, so I tend toward (for serious relationships) pinning things down really well. I'm bluntly honest, and demand the same from girls I'm dating. If I feel I've been ignored, manipulated, or in any way mistreated, I'm pretty straightforward about it.
In general:
Honesty. I don't demand rigorous honesty about everything. If you don't want to admit that you killed a man in Reno just to watch him die, I'm okay with that. But from the moment of the relationship beginning forward, it's not past "secrets" it's current "deceit". If there are things you don't want to share about your family, or your past, I can respect that. If there are things you're doing while we're dating you don't want me to know about, we have a problem
No cheating. I mean, honestly. I don't have to explain it. Unless we entered into an "open relationship" arrangement (and we won't have), cheating is grounds for immediate breaking up. Exclusions, of course, exist for cases of rape. Though, as evil as this may sound, if you chose to get so drunk you don't remember saying yes, I'm probably through with you anyway
No trying to convert me. I'm an atheist, I've had this problem, and it's a dealbreaker for me. I don't believe in god, you're not going to convince me to. I can respect your faith, but you have to respect my lack of it.
Everything else is kind of malleable. If a girl who I like for a lot of other reasons also happens to like Dane Cook, I can probably overlook that.
In general:
Honesty. I don't demand rigorous honesty about everything. If you don't want to admit that you killed a man in Reno just to watch him die, I'm okay with that. But from the moment of the relationship beginning forward, it's not past "secrets" it's current "deceit". If there are things you don't want to share about your family, or your past, I can respect that. If there are things you're doing while we're dating you don't want me to know about, we have a problem
No cheating. I mean, honestly. I don't have to explain it. Unless we entered into an "open relationship" arrangement (and we won't have), cheating is grounds for immediate breaking up. Exclusions, of course, exist for cases of rape. Though, as evil as this may sound, if you chose to get so drunk you don't remember saying yes, I'm probably through with you anyway
No trying to convert me. I'm an atheist, I've had this problem, and it's a dealbreaker for me. I don't believe in god, you're not going to convince me to. I can respect your faith, but you have to respect my lack of it.
Everything else is kind of malleable. If a girl who I like for a lot of other reasons also happens to like Dane Cook, I can probably overlook that.
The Rules of relationship are as arbitary as any other rules.
Biologically speaking and by observing nature, the Male mammal has billions of sperm while the female only has a few eggs.
The optimum solution would be for everybody to bang everybody to keep up the human population, however females also have one other requirement besides reproduction, the survival of the mother and the child.
So mass orgies are out.
But Polygamy is in. Throughout history, it has been traditional for wealthy, powerful or fit individuals to have multiple wives.
In fact today it is still observable in Moslems and Mormon cultures.
In France, Japan, having a mistress is a common thing.
So in other words, if a girl cheats on you, dump her, because you don't want to take care of someone else's baby.
For women, if a guy cheats on you, it depends on whether he'll stick around. If he doesn't dump him.
Biologically speaking and by observing nature, the Male mammal has billions of sperm while the female only has a few eggs.
The optimum solution would be for everybody to bang everybody to keep up the human population, however females also have one other requirement besides reproduction, the survival of the mother and the child.
So mass orgies are out.
But Polygamy is in. Throughout history, it has been traditional for wealthy, powerful or fit individuals to have multiple wives.
In fact today it is still observable in Moslems and Mormon cultures.
In France, Japan, having a mistress is a common thing.
So in other words, if a girl cheats on you, dump her, because you don't want to take care of someone else's baby.
For women, if a guy cheats on you, it depends on whether he'll stick around. If he doesn't dump him.
Really my only rules in relationships are
1. Don't use me for my money
2. Don't try to make me change my life
3. Don't cheat on me with another guy (or unattractive girl)
Other than that I'll obviously break it off if I lose interest, but that's not necessarily a "rule" so much as it is a personal preference
1. Don't use me for my money
2. Don't try to make me change my life
3. Don't cheat on me with another guy (or unattractive girl)
Other than that I'll obviously break it off if I lose interest, but that's not necessarily a "rule" so much as it is a personal preference