Alcoholic parent

[wolfy098]

Right I'm sorry to waste your time with this but the Escapist is the only place I know of which won't tell me to go and become a serial killer.

I have an alcoholic father who comes round and sits on the porch everytime he runs out of food and has spent it all on some sort of beer.

I'm sick of this and don't know how to deal with him.

Once again I'm sorry to waste your time but I need help on this one.

 

[rokkolpo]

you might wanna confront him.(on a not alcoholic day)

together with a friend of him and your mom or someone close to him.
they did that to my uncle.(getting told of by your 8 year old son must hurt)

 

[Cherry Cola]

Confront him, best thing to do.

 

[lvl9000_woot]

Talk to him or talk to a school counselor or call Child Protective Services.

 

[maddawg IAJI]

Confront him. Talk to him about getting some help and try to get him in the AA meetings. I would also check out there website. They have a lot of info on confronting an alcholic family member.

 

[EMFCRACKSHOT]

[user]Bonsaik[/user] This guy is great at helping people with things like this.

 

[wolfy098]

Confront him. Talk to him about getting some help and try to get him in the AA meetings. I would also check out there website. They have a lot of info on confronting an alcholic family member.

Problem is he's had help before, he was stuck in a hospital after his liver (I think) gave up.
he went off for 3 months saying "I'll never go back."

That didn't work out.

 

[Souplex]

Be glad you have family that actually interacts with you outside of holidays. *Sobs in a corner*

 

[ma55ter_fett]

Confront him. Talk to him about getting some help and try to get him in the AA meetings. I would also check out there website. They have a lot of info on confronting an alcholic family member.

Problem is he's had help before, he was stuck in a hospital after his liver (I think) gave up.
he went off for 3 months saying "I'll never go back."

That didn't work out.

Is he a mean drunk or a friendly drunk?

 

[Arawn.Chernobog]

Calls his worthless ass on it

 

[Abedeus]

Get a court order restraining him from coming within 50 feet of you or your family. Also, it would make him pay you some money every month.

Problem solved. He gets into trouble, not your problem. He gets sick, not your problem.

Kills himself? Well, duh, his fault.

 

[wolfy098]

Confront him. Talk to him about getting some help and try to get him in the AA meetings. I would also check out there website. They have a lot of info on confronting an alcholic family member.

Problem is he's had help before, he was stuck in a hospital after his liver (I think) gave up.
he went off for 3 months saying "I'll never go back."

That didn't work out.

Is he a mean drunk or a friendly drunk?

Crazy "why won't you let me in" stalking you and stinks of beer kinda drunk... If he was a happy drunk it would be different

 

[ma55ter_fett]

Confront him. Talk to him about getting some help and try to get him in the AA meetings. I would also check out there website. They have a lot of info on confronting an alcholic family member.

Problem is he's had help before, he was stuck in a hospital after his liver (I think) gave up.
he went off for 3 months saying "I'll never go back."

That didn't work out.

Is he a mean drunk or a friendly drunk?

Crazy "why won't you let me in" stalking you and stinks of beer kinda drunk... If he was a happy drunk it would be different

Do you live alone or with your family?

 

[wolfy098]

Confront him. Talk to him about getting some help and try to get him in the AA meetings. I would also check out there website. They have a lot of info on confronting an alcholic family member.

Problem is he's had help before, he was stuck in a hospital after his liver (I think) gave up.
he went off for 3 months saying "I'll never go back."

That didn't work out.

Is he a mean drunk or a friendly drunk?

Crazy "why won't you let me in" stalking you and stinks of beer kinda drunk... If he was a happy drunk it would be different

Do you live alone or with your family?

I live with my mother and sister...
(I'm 14 nearly 15)

 

[Gigano]

Confronting him about his problem is probably the only way to go, if you want to help him or keep him in your life. He needs to know how this affects his son and other family members. Alcoholism is a weakness, not a sin, and he needs powerful motivation to begin working on it, way beyond what he can work himself up to. He needs to see how this harms not only himself, but those he (should) hold dear.

Get a court order restraining him from coming within 50 feet of you or your family. Also, it would make him pay you some money every month.

Problem solved. He gets into trouble, not your problem. He gets sick, not your problem

Brutal and heartless as this might seem, it might be the solution if you're really at your wits and strengths end. There's no reason for you to go down with your father on this, and if you haven't got the energy to deal with this extremely difficult situation, there's no shame in that. This is not something which can be required of anyone to deal with. Never feel ashamed of what your father has chosen or inflicted on himself, it is not your responsibility to help him, only an option you may choose if you are capable (when I was 14, I most certainly could not have dealt with this kind of problem - but you may be stronger than I was).

 

[ma55ter_fett]

Confront him. Talk to him about getting some help and try to get him in the AA meetings. I would also check out there website. They have a lot of info on confronting an alcholic family member.

Problem is he's had help before, he was stuck in a hospital after his liver (I think) gave up.
he went off for 3 months saying "I'll never go back."

That didn't work out.

Is he a mean drunk or a friendly drunk?

Crazy "why won't you let me in" stalking you and stinks of beer kinda drunk... If he was a happy drunk it would be different

Do you live alone or with your family?

I live with my mother and sister...
(I'm 14 nearly 15)

First of all I will state that I am not in any way a professional on these matters.

I would highly encourage you to seek out local domestic violence help groups (use the power of google) they will be able to offer professional advice and assistance. They are usually a free non profit group so you do not need to worry about huge fees. A school councler can also offer assistance and provide you with the means of contacting other people who can also help you.

I would NOT confront him if I were in your shoes. Because of the behavior you have described (mainly the stalking and turning up on your doorstep) I am inclined to beleive that it would not turn out well, I think he would either get violent or make threats of violence.

Discuss your feelings with your mother and sister, if you are truely concerned about his behavior then chances are they are as well.

Personally...

I would sugest haveing a restraining order placed on him, given his behavior the three of you should be able to agree to that course of action.

 

[Stoic raptor]

I dont know. But I know that Alcoholism is a disease. You should get help though. There are groups that help with this.

 

[wolfy098]

I would NOT confront him if I were in your shoes. Because of the behavior you have described (mainly the stalking and turning up on your doorstep) I am inclined to beleive that it would not turn out well, I think he would either get violent or make threats of violence.

Discuss your feelings with your mother and sister, if you are truely concerned about his behavior then chances are they are as well.

Personally...

I would sugest haveing a restraining order placed on him, given his behavior the three of you should be able to agree to that course of action.

Thanks, threats of suicide would be more likely though he's done that before. I'll take that advice and have a look around.

 

[AkJay]

My aunt died.
My mom started drinking.
Mom has drinking problems.
Got drunk every night.
Parents Divorced.
Mom drank herself to death.
Moms dead.

that about sums it up.

 

[TailsRodrigez]

confront him or call child services