Aliens give you a starship...


New member
Jan 6, 2012
Edith The Hutt said:
What do you do with your new-found power and infamy?
Turn it on the aliens who gave it to me, I put it myself at the disposal of the nations I support to expand both on Earth and into the cosmos as I eliminate any other aliens I may run into.

it will not be used by others for war, not by ISIS, not by Russia, not by the US, not even against North Korea by anyone but me, and if I'm using it for war it'll be for a damn good reason.
Gotta love how so many high minded opinions fall back to being a benevolent dictator.

That is ultimately the essence of this question, it's just some are more honest in how they'd wield their new found power than others. Also, it's casually to say what you'd do in a mental exercise, one just has to see how many people wish ____ country was nuked when everyone would freeze if they were presented the red button to press and do just that.

My take is that I care nothing for alien life and that I view is as an existential threat to all life on earth while Mankind must benefit from this windfall, but it must be those whose culture and outlook are ones I agree with, namely Western civilization, those parts which aren't falling to pieces.

Granted I know the weapon technology will be a controversial one. My ideal is for the weapon technology to NOT be receated (we got small wars going on right now, alien weapon will make it worse) however I can see this being a trust issue aswell since what is stopping me for using the weapon against Earth aswell since I don't think they can accept a face value alone despite looking into my profile? Sure they can't stop me or replace me with another person they can trust more but yet again they would rather killed me if it means destroying the ship aswell than to let me run wild.
Well ok the only time I will them to recreate the weapon is that I encounter a alien threat or an invasion of some kind. When it come to this, I would want to make a law about using alien weapons against Alien threats but not huamn lives (sound like a contridiction to me for some reason) which the world leaders must all signed so if the technology got leak and fall in the wrong hand, they make it their piroty to stop it.
Got leaked? If you know something is possible it's only a matter of time before someone recreates the technology. If we lived in a world where FTL is possible, the largest obstacle preventing us from colonizing new worlds is the belief that it's impossible.

Military tech is no different. You show someone a nuke and people will start looking around for how to make more.

So, you're presented with three options and have to find what you value more, what the ship can offer or what danger it presents to Mankind.

1: Showing the world the ship and what it can do letting people know that Pandora's Box exist to open.

2: Accepting the ship and the destroy it to keep everyone in the dark.

3: Playing superhero with the ship by trying to help humanity out without revealing its existence or dick off into the universe and do things that don't effect Earth.

One thing you cannot stop people from doing it making weapons, they will always find a way to make better ways of killing each other and it's only their consciences that keep them from using them, this is why only 2 nuke devices have been used.

However, if you try to prevent them from making weapons you don't want they'll do it anyway and if you catch them you'll become a mutual enemy of everyone. You decided to knock them down a peg and you'll only find yourself killing lots of them and becoming world dictator, the very thing you sought to prevent anyone from becoming in the first place.

Souther Thorn said:
Gather up the fam and friends and take a tour of our local system before trying to pick up Neil Degrasse Tyson and Brian Cox to parlay offering the tech to altruistic terran interests at no charge to public and 0 secrecy. Start a contract ferry service for PRI and others.
Open all channels, try and see if we can contact The Culture.
Cry for a while.
Funny how people think scientists are more sagely than others when given their profession, they're just better at discovering new aspects of our universe.

The last people I'd give this to are scientists, who are quick at creating new problems and slow to solve them. As audacious and revolting as it may sound to some, they only people I'd be even remotely trusting of to hand such a thing over to are those who work directly with nuclear weapons both in the employment of them and in the planning of how to use them, they are the only people on the planet who intimately and informally know what power they'd be wielding.

And if you don't understand what I mean, I know of a man who worked on planning how to employ nuclear weapons during the Cold War who killed himself nearly two decades ago when he realized that the future was ushering in an new era where irrational actors were getting their hands on nukes and the calm, sane days of the Cold War where both sides didn't want a war to happen were over.


New member
Aug 7, 2009
Let American, British, German, and Japanese scientists get the information to reverse engineer the thing, gather my crew of both friends and family as well as others that I would like to spend a lifetime with then set sail towards the next human habitable planet to set up my own Star Empire.


Stabat mater dolorosa
Dec 13, 2008
(sings) Iiiiiiiiiii'm... hooked on a feeling! (points for reference! It's an easy one, come on...)

Otherwise, I'd pass it to the UK government and push for our own space program, which would easily be better than NASA because of us having our own actual alien spaceship. Then start pushing for a UK manned mission to Mars. As long as we watch out for water-based life-forms up there, we should be fine... (another reference, guys...).

Michel Henzel

Just call me God
May 13, 2014
Collect a bunch of trustable crewmembers, be the first human on Mars, explore the rest of the solar system and then it's bye bye solar system and hello galaxy.


King of the Celery people
Jan 18, 2012
Go full Mister House on everyone, aka "fix" everyone's problem whether they like it or not.

Also, I ama tell the media to stop investigating my life, or risk... certain beams heading their way.

Also, who is dumb enough to "confiscate" the ship? If the NSA/CIA/KGB wants to have my ship there will be a very large hole in the middle of DC/Moscow.


Elite Member
Jun 30, 2010
I would go to the holodeck and consider doing things one could never speak of. Sit there for hours contemplating executing such deeds. Create useless walls and securities for unneeded sense of seclusion. Perverse the limitless opportunities of my imagination until food is required or for 5 minutes (because realistically...)

Become drunk with power and my entire moral compass is skewered. Make contact with world leaders dressed as an alien and make prank calls and such. Hack the internet with my ships superior and upload onto peoples computers fake--

Oh, shit. Make fake clones of celebrities on the holodeck and call it "Orgy at the Oscars" and stuff.
Go on Reddit and take requests.

Old Father Eternity

New member
Aug 6, 2010
Instruct the ship to devise and construct a safe-box of sorts which can only be opened on some technological stage around the middle ground between the current human level and that of the aliens (of course nothing is foolproof as fools are ever so crafty). Put the schematics of the ship and a copy of its database into said box and shoot it into the ocean ... 'Ya want it? There ya have it, go fetch.'
When all said and done, pack up some things of sentimental value and bugger off with no particular direction or goal in mind. What humankind does with that knowledge if and/or when they acquire it is no business of mine, unless said knowledge includes specifics of 'wormhole tech'.


Answer Hazy, Ask Again Later
Jun 15, 2011
You got this idea from the "Tin Man" episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, didn't you? :p


1) Talk to the UN about plans to replicate the tech (because I don't much fancy the likely results if I only shared it with a single nation) and/or put a scientific delegation on the ship to study it while it's in action. This would be a real game changer for the world on so many fronts[footnote]Presumably including communication, fuel sources, artificial intelligence, computing power, travel of course, confirmation that there's other life out there...[/footnote], I think that's worth sharing if I can do so smartly.

2) Offer my services for that 'colonize Mars' idea that occasionally makes headlines, making the process much quicker and effectively taking 'one way' off the table for it. Heck, I could probably deliver pizza for the colonists if I was so inclined.

3) Search the ships databases for information on friendly species.

4) Work on getting a crew put together, at which point we will figure out step 5.


Your #1 Source for the Dino Porn
Jul 10, 2013
Uh... Go to Disneyland?

OT: Pull a fucking Lelouch and hope, in theory, the things turn out better than expected... Other than that, use this opportunity to be interviewed by Oprah herself...


New member
Sep 10, 2008
Once I determine if the ship can sustain me for the rest of my life. I need only one thing. I may invite a few like minded friends along.


Computer orbital bombardment on my mark.

Not the whole world mind you. Just enough to convince everyone I am a massive threat. Maybe then NASA will get some funding for space colonies.


Noisy Lurker
Jul 16, 2008
I have no problem developing a god complex with that kind of power. I probably would smite some low priority target just to prove my wrath, then lay down some rules to follow so that people stop being dicks to each other on a global scale. I would also tell everyone I have a cloaking device, so don't bother trying to counterattack me, because you won't find me. Then I'd just leave and go explore the galaxy while everyone thinks I'm invisible.

Edith The Hutt

Flying Monkey
Oct 16, 2010
chadachada123 said:
OP, you may want to update your post to say just how fast the Enterprise actually GOES. For reference, it goes at a (normal) max of 1,649 times the speed of light. That means going across the Solar System in 24 seconds, to the nearest star in 23 hours, and a whopping 52 years to cross the galaxy.
000Ronald said:
Edith The Hutt said:
What do you do with your new-found power and infamy?
Mmm. Good question. But I've discovered that I can't possibly answer that question without having a few questions answered.
Hello! OP here, sorry for the radio silence, life happened. There been a few requests for clarification so I figured I'd pipe up. The thing I like about this scenario is the more I think about it the more problems and possibilities crop up, but they do depend on a few finer details. I think you guys highlighted a few of them:

Was the ship designed for humans?
No. But it has some basic adaptations for humans and more can be adapted, it's up to the reader to decide quite how much but to set a baseline: There are at least a set of five rooms the size of a small-medium size flat/apartment which are already adapted to be human-friendly (atmosphere, gravity, temperature, etc.), the ship can be commanded from here. Waste disposal and fresh water are available. Further areas can be adapted, these could be hundreds of floors of lush apartments akin to a giant interstellar hotel or they could just be a giant empty space like a large warehouse or hanger. Pick whichever you find most interesting.

Can the ship safely land?
Again, pick whatever you find most interesting. However planet to ship transportation is possible and fairly quick.

What kind of facilities on the ship?
I set a power level of the Enterprise-D [] and assumed similar facilities. The ship can be specialized in a particular way if you find that interesting (e.g.: mining ship, troop transport, survey ship) but as a baseline it has the following facilities:

Unadapted the ship can sustain at least 5 people, with adaptation this can expand to at least 500 people, more if you put serious work into it.

Scientific Facilities
The ship has stellar cartography capabilities to track every object larger than 20 metres in diameter within a light-day, it can analyze physical objects brought on board down to a molecular level. It has a number of remote probes which can be deployed to augment these capabilities. The ship has sensors capable of broad-spectrum E-M detection, allowing for sufficient spectrographic analysis of tracked objects to determine rough composition at a distance. If you want specific labs you'll probably have to build your own.

Manufacturing Facilities
The ship has extensive manufacturing facilities, either in the form of molecular replicators or massive on-board automated factories, is has the ability to harvest asteroids to ensure it has a sufficient quantity of naturally occurring raw elements and an ability to manufacture limited quantities of non-naturally occurring materials (e.g.: transuranic elements, exotic matter, etc). It can put these elements together in whatever combinations you care to specify down to a molecular level, you can use the scientific facilities to build up blue-prints of existing objects if you wish, the ship will also have a databank of spare parts, useful tools and the like (note: tools may require adapting for human use, but this is a matter of fiddling with the blue-prints for ergonomic reasons). Manufacturing capacity is up to you, but I tend to find interesting possibilities exist around the level of a no more than kilotonne a week.

The ship contains databanks with the configurations of tools and spare parts, but no explanations of how these work other than basic user manuals. There are no vast catalogues of scientific data on board, if you want to work out why things work, you'll have to reverse engineer them.

You out-gun the entire planet by several orders of magnitude, however the weapons you have aren't necessarily the most precise or small. Lets say you can quite merrily go from glassing a continent down to blowing up a building, but anything more precise is going to require someone to go down into the atmosphere with a ray-gun.

Can the ship be adapted
Yes. Using on-board facilities certainly, using Earth-bound facilities possibly.

How reverse-engineerable is the ship
While the technology used on the ship is not so advanced that Earth scientists and engineers can't work out the basic configurations of components there are probably components which cannot be manufactured using current technology.

How fast is the ship?
I mentioned the Enterprise-D, which can comfortably travel at about 1000 times the speed of light (or about warp 8, for the trekies out there); that puts roughtly 10,000 stars within a month's travel. Quite frankly you could increase this to 50,000 times light speed and it wouldn't make the ship any less interesting to me. Consider somewhere between 1,000c and 50,000c as a top speed, with a range of no less than 120,000 light years. FTL travel doesn't involve time-dialation because that would suck.

Asita said:
You got this idea from the "Tin Man" episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, didn't you? :p
Nope. But it's as good a version of this scenario as any other I've heard :)

J Tyran

New member
Dec 15, 2011
Beam up a bunch of volunteers that are smarter than me, scientists and engineers and so on for a once in a lifetime opportunity to see whats out there.

Then come back in a couple of years and start beaming politicians into space, not for any noble purpose or for power. Just for my own amusement, they enjoy ruining peoples lives for their own personal satisfaction so they should understand.


Just had a better idea, beam them into the middle of any warzones they caused. Bush and Blair? Meet Mr IS, Putin? Have a fun hiking holiday in the Eastern Ukraine!


What am I doing here?
Jun 3, 2014
I might just start a commercial business. Take people to space, come home, make millions. Could offer my services to the government of my choice to expand their space tech, whichever one gives me the most money.

...I'm a really bad capitalist.


New member
Jan 5, 2009
1 get the hell off earth

2 get loved one on board and let them chose there next step. That way they are not used against me.

find out what kind of games it has. If it has a holo deck like the star ship enterprise mess around with it for a while.

3 figure out whats next.

Question now

How good is the AI. Is it stupit like a pc and needs to be told how to do something. Or is it more like Lex and kind of a living being able to think for it self while slaved to a captain

2 How do I communicate with it. Is it voice only or can it read though patterns.

3 can it know it captain in trouble. You said it everyone knows I have it so might decided what I do with it.
Sep 24, 2008
Never let anyone near it. Especially Scientists. But more over Scientists, any national power ever. Not even for any type of money.

That type of power needs to be earned. I don't deserve it either, but that kind of power without any real trial or error will lead to not respecting it. As soon as we figured out what we could do with atoms, we made entire cities disappear with after effects that were felt up until recently. We learned about diseases, and we tried to weaponize them as well.

'Sane Minded' Atheists talking about mass murdering ideologies they don't like or believe in, Profiteering minds who don't care if said destructive power goes into the hands of governments who are not even taken to hiding their lies and abuse of its citizens well... I hope there will come a time where humankind could use such power responsibly, but I know for a fact that said time is not now.

I'd hide it as best as I could. If the Aliens came without the knowledge of SETI or any government eyes-on-the-sky, I'll assume a cloaking device of some kind. I'll use the ship to learn about intelligent life out there and then ponder if I'd like to join them.


Level 2 Lumberjack
Jul 17, 2009
... I honestly have no idea what I'd do with a Starship. The thought never occurred to me before, and now that you bring it up, I just don't know what I'd do with the thing.

My first thought was to get a large group of people and go find a new homeland where I'm pretty much King for life, but I like the Earth too much to do that, I dislike traveling, and I don't want to be seen as a Messiah by these people (Odds are the people that go with me would think I'm the Messiah or something akin to that).

I wouldn't use it for war; I never want to travel out of the planet (Heck, I don't wanna leave the USA); I wouldn't sell it to the highest bidder; I don't trust any government to use it right; and keeping it hidden would be defeating the purpose wouldn't it?

I think I'd just give it back to the Aliens. I know that makes me a weirdo, but I just don't want it.


New member
Jul 7, 2011
1. Let space programs study and replicate the ship

2. Wait for earth's governments to start colonizing other planets and start interplanetary travel/trade

3. Fly around smuggling, bounty hunting, and pirating what I like since I would have a bit of a head start prior to colonization I would hire my own team of scientists to ensure I have the best weaponry and the fastest drive on my ship.

Storm Dragon

New member
Nov 29, 2011
Well, first I'd see if the ship's systems could be used to get an FTL Internet connection. Then I'd probably declare myself Emperor of Mars or something. I'll figure out what comes next after I get some sleep.