Anal probing - What's the point?

[Boneasse]

G'day Escapists!

I've been watching a lot of movies with aliens lately, unintentionally I swear, and it seems that as long as the movie takes place on earth; there's always someone claiming to have been abducted.

That's right, abducted. Aliens came and snatched him/her right off of the surface of the earth and performed tests on their bodies. They took out cavities, teeth, asked them questions, took samples from their bodies, and sometimes... stuck devices op their behinds.

Now, call me a sceptic - but I have a hard time picturing why some alien lifeform, more intelligent than ours, would travel lightyears in space to put devices up anyone's bum. I mean, DNA tests and such, I can understand.

So this begs the question;

Why do you think aliens would anally probe anyone? What would be the point of such an act? What could they possibly gain by doing so?
[sub]

Spoiler: Disclaimer

This whole thread is created based on a "what if" scenario, which means you don't necessarily have to answer it seriously!

[/sub]

 

[ReservoirAngel]

Well from my own experience, it's fun.

Serious time now. And as for what they can really achieve from it...I dunno. Surely brain-scanning would be more useful than jamming something up the unlucky (or lucky, depending on your point of view) person's arse.

 

[CoverYourHead]

Because people who originally came up with the idea of anal probing were repressing their homosexuality and this is how it manifested itself!

... Okay, that or because aliens are weird. Seriously, those guys are the creepiest guys at this party we call the Milky Way.

 

[Celtic_Kerr]

I think someone just claimed to be abducted, claimed something ridiculous liek "They raped me! They anal probed me!" and it just caught on due to the ridiculousness

 

[WrongSprite]

Some sort of medical analysis I assume.

It's not that weird, we do exactly the same. What do you think we do with suppositories and thermometers?

 

[Cyaneed]

South Park - Cartman has a satellite in his ass. . . Thats the point.

 

[Boneasse]

I think someone just claimed to be abducted, claimed something ridiculous liek "They raped me! They anal probed me!" and it just caught on due to the ridiculousness

But if we disregard the fact that the likelyhood of abduction is ridiculous, why would they do it?

 

[Celtic_Kerr]

I think someone just claimed to be abducted, claimed something ridiculous liek "They raped me! They anal probed me!" and it just caught on due to the ridiculousness

But if we disregard the fact that the likelyhood of abduction is ridiculous, why would they do it?

I'm thinking it would basically be like stool samples, leanrning our weknesses.

Only other thought coming to mind: Aliens Gone Wild

 

[Vie]

Its well known that Greys are generally, though not exclusively, unable to maintain an erection unless they are anally probing a slack jawed yokel from a backwards planet.

In essence its Viagra for aliens.

 

[DanielBrown]

Surpressed homosexual thoughts from the white trash that claim to have gotten abducted, perhaps?
If it's aliens I reckon it's a medical analysis... or they're just sadistical maniacs!

 

[xmbts]

Spoiler: It's all very scientific.

 

[GameGoddess101]

Maybe Aliens are just really interested in colon cancer? Maybe it's rampant where they're from and they're searching for a cure.

And of course I'm not serious! What ever gave you that idea...
I personally have no idea, in all seriousness. Then again, how serious can we be when talking about butt-probes.

 

[SturmDolch]

Maybe aliens have it backwards. Their brain is in their butt cheeks, they eat with their butt, and they poop out of their mouths. So when they perform anal probes to look at our brains, they can't see anything and come to the conclusion that we're wastes of space that they can ignore until they need to clear Earth out of the way for an intergalactic highway.

 

[Onyx Oblivion]

Aliens don't poop?

 

[lemiel14n3]

maybe it's a tagging system, they shove a sensor up our ass that records out movements and vital signs, like what we do to dolphins, but much more invasive.

 

[Lord Kloo]

Its fun...??...

I don't see the point in it but i'm sure they do it to implant some device that causes your poop (I can't spell faeses apparently) to mutate when in contact with water and releases chemicals that slowly terraform the planet they poached you from to favour alien life forms...

Too Far..?

 

[Something Amyss]

G'day Escapists!

I've been watching a lot of movies with aliens lately, unintentionally I swear, and it seems that as long as the movie takes place on earth; there's always someone claiming to have been abducted.

That's right, abducted. Aliens came and snatched him/her right off of the surface of the earth and performed tests on their bodies. They took out cavities, teeth, asked them questions, took samples from their bodies, and sometimes... stuck devices op their behinds.

Now, call me a sceptic - but I have a hard time picturing why some alien lifeform, more intelligent than ours, would travel lightyears in space to put devices up anyone's bum. I mean, DNA tests and such, I can understand.

So this begs the question;

Why do you think aliens would anally probe anyone? What would be the point of such an act? What could they possibly gain by doing so?
[sub]

Spoiler: Disclaimer

This whole thread is created based on a "what if" scenario, which means you don't necessarily have to answer it seriously!

[/sub]

They're totally confused about human biology?

 

[GrinningManiac]

The only time Doctors do it is when they're checking our health in terms of Prostate cancer

The only time it's done anywhere else (outside Soho) is checking for "concealed items" at prisons and airports. I guess mabye the Aliens want to make doubly sure we don't have cancer/a knife up our backside?

 

[Dexiro]

Most people don't like the idea of people putting stuff up their butt. And a few that do claimed aliens did it to them.

 

[Zykon TheLich]

Well, all those slack jawed yokel women have probably had a lot of children, soooo..... *cough* ...I'll be leaving now.