Just ignore Ultrajoe, he is probably just pissed at reading another Khell rant and then came across your particular minority issue. Though he did bring up a good point about attacking your audience can be a self fulfilling prophesy of being the victim. But to be honest I found myself relating to the same sense of not belonging, it is painful and thus hard to not immediately go to your fall back position of assuming others are against you. Consider this about your psyche though, you actually found yourself comfortable enough to rant on a public forum. Think about that for a second - either you are looking for negative attention or you don't actually think the Escapist forum goers will be against you.
That said though, I totally understand the loathing for the use of "gay" and "fag" as a derogative term in gaming between gamers. They have nothing to go on perhaps your use of language in chat, a tone of voice, or your play style - and sometimes nothing at all, just taking a shot in the dark. Between guys the use of that language, even if they actually both happen to be that sexual persuasion, are fighting words. Might as well throw in something nasty about their mom and/or female companion at that point to drive the point home of 'supposed' superiority. Is it any wonder such words are often used in a public setting? They aren't trying to put you down for your sake, they are trying to establish dominance and have others know their position.
Now, I am going to assume you are referring to being androgynous, rather than having the genitalia of a man and a woman. I am inferring from your rant that you are a male with qualities that are similar to that of a woman's archetype. I can so relate to this, so know that you are not alone in this condition and the social stigma it carries.
I am lean muscled. I have long, thick eyelashes. My daughter inherited those physical qualities, my wife says she is really happy that happened. I can stretch really easily ... that helps as a goalie. If it was just physical though, maybe I wouldn't be so easily sought out as a target growing up, but I also liked to dance, write, draw, read thick books, feel romantic... I might as well have painted a target on my back.
I still remember those fuckers who ruined my prom night. I was dancing on out there on the floor, with all these beautiful girls because the guys were a bunch of pussies to get out there too. The techno music was bumping and I was having a good time just exerting myself in dancing in time to my favorite type of music, not a care in the world. That should have been my first clue, I should have known that hick Canadian village would have been filled with the kinda small town people who naturally tend to view anything that is not the norm as something that just has to be fucked with. So, there I was just practicing my own brand of euphoria, my own personal rave, when that asshole comes up to me and starts grinding up against me with a smirk on his face. Whatever, I dance away into the crowd. Only to bump into his friends, also wearing smirks and blocking my exit. "Hey, want to dance, fag." His shit eating grin and their laughs said it all, it was all I could do to not fucking fly into a murderous rage right then. Damn it! Fuck them all, I'm out of here before I do something I regret, my 'kind' are obviously not welcome here. And what did I do to them that deserved this? Having a good time because being anything but miserable was abhorrent to their idea of what different kind of guy's position in their world is.
Of course, that was not the only incident growing up, but for the sake of trying to be less long winded than I normally find myself typing up, I'll save you the life story. Suffice it to say though, I get off easier now to a degree by letting my facial hair grow out. And I try to keep that heart that used to be on my sleeve tucked away when I go out. I feel far more comfortable with who I am while playing and discussing games but those archetypes of "manly man" and the use of "gay" in online gaming culture still rankle from time to time ... until I make a decision just to close the game or browser window. A lot harder to do that in social situations in real life, when you need to stick around and find a way to deal with the bullshit - I try to blend into the background as best I can then and keep quiet. Hopefully, in that respect, you will fare better socially than I have, Shade Jackrabbit.
