Any Other LGBT Gamers Here?

[Miss Layton]

Bi-guy here, wanted to say hi and give a belated welcome to The Escapist!

I have to admit, outside of LGBT-related forums, The Escapist does have one of the nicest and most accepting communities in it. I can't think of any points off the top of my head where I've gone into a thread where someone pointed out their sexuality and got blasted for it, at least.

Anyway, enjoy your stay!

*Curtsies*

The more I stay here, the longer I come to love the Escapist. The community here is wonderful. i've already made an absurd number of friends here, two of whom live in my home city! What are the odds!

 

[TheDoctor455]

Thank you. Hmm... I think I can guess what some of 'QUILTBAG' stands for, would you mind clarifying it for me, and others who might be confused by the term?
Thank you.

It was defined farther up this page, but I'll copy/paste in case anyone missed it the first two times.

Queer/questioning
Undecided
Intersex
Lesbian
Transgender/Transsexual
Bisexual
Asexual
Gay

As noted, the L,G,B, and T are identical to the same letters in LGBT, but there are additional letters for other related groups including Asexuals.

Thank you. Must be a very recent development. Had a very progressive sex ed class in college barely two years and half years ago. Didn't mention 'QUILTBAG' at all. Though, thankfully, it did mention asexuals... though that was before I had... admitted to myself that I was one.

 

[TheDoctor455]

.>
Can an asexual join the party here?
I was mistaken for gay once, and bullied for it. I try not to dwell on it.

Sure! You're the A in QUILTBAG after all.

... oh right, the thread title says LGBT. See, this is why I prefer QUILTBAG. It handles far more groups.

Thank you. Hmm... I think I can guess what some of 'QUILTBAG' stands for, would you mind clarifying it for me, and others who might be confused by the term?

Thank you.

OT:

I'd love to see games depicting more LGBT characters. Love to see more races depicted in games... and not in stereotypical roles. Love to see more women in games... I'd just love to see more diversity in games, period.

But... given how media has handled, or completely failed to handle depicting asexuals... at all...

I'd suspect that by the time videogames (and most modern media in general, really) start depicting asexuals... just about everything else will have been covered by then... and gone over and explored more thoroughly by the time asexuals get even... a passing reference.

Seriously. Check out the tiny list of examples on the TV Tropes page for asexuals. Its like we don't exist as far as the media is concerned.

And... as I said... I was mistaken for gay once, years ago. I got a taste of the bigotry that the LGBT community is faced with all too often. Still, I'd say even that is better than the greeting most asexuals get: complete denial of our existence.

Let's put it this way... the bigotry, at the very least, is an acknowledgement of your existence. Asexuals like me though? To the 'mainstream'... we'd as well be ghosts from what I can see.


Sorry... didn't meant to go into a somewhat angsty, somewhat repetitive ramble there.

Anyway...

Well... I'm around. My Steam account is the same as my Escapist one. Mostly. If you're playing with someone calling themselves 'Doc' on L4D 1, Killing Floor, Civ 5, Endless Space... etc. that's probably me.

Oh, honey...

*Hugs sympathetically*

Thank you. Hmm... if you'd like to chat with me, feel free to PM me. Fair warning though: I'm an aspiring writer. Just about everything anyone ever says to me has the potential to turn up somewhere in my work.

 

[bananafishtoday]

.>
Can an asexual join the party here?
I was mistaken for gay once, and bullied for it. I try not to dwell on it.

Sure! You're the A in QUILTBAG after all.

... oh right, the thread title says LGBT. See, this is why I prefer QUILTBAG. It handles far more groups.

Plus the (obv less important) word nerd benefits! Like the fact that "QUILTBAG" could easily become "quiltbag" once it enters common usage, like SCUBA and LASER did. (If LGBT ever morphed, it'd be like GP -> Jeep, and the best we could hope for would be "legbutt." No thx.) Or the fact that it's two syllables instead of four. Or that the word "quiltbag" is cute.

The Escapist can at times appear to have an above average LGBT presence. Though I think it may be a trick of perception, as sexuality and gender identity are only really going to be discussed in threads centred around the LGBT community or issues. Naturally these threads will have a larger number of LGBT posters, or at least seam to.

Agreed. Threads about LGBT issues that get a majority of their replies from straight/cis posters (and anything about feminism) strike a very... "different" tone. I don't think the Escapist is more hostile or less diverse than most other sites that cater to the gaming community, but it certainly isn't a bastion of progressive thought either. I'm more than a little surprised that this thread has been so positive and conflict-free so far, to be honest.

 

[Darken12]

Agreed. Threads about LGBT issues that get a majority of their replies from straight/cis posters (and anything about feminism) strike a very... "different" tone. I don't think the Escapist is more hostile or less diverse than most other sites that cater to the gaming community, but it certainly isn't a bastion of progressive thought either. I'm more than a little surprised that this thread has been so positive and conflict-free so far, to be honest.

You voice my very thoughts exactly.

Plus the (obv less important) word nerd benefits! Like the fact that "QUILTBAG" could easily become "quiltbag" once it enters common usage, like SCUBA and LASER did. (If LGBT ever morphed, it'd be like GP -> Jeep, and the best we could hope for would be "legbutt." No thx.) Or the fact that it's two syllables instead of four. Or that the word "quiltbag" is cute.

That... that is very convincing. I am almost swayed into changing acronym use. My only concern is that the word is too cute. I fear it might undermine serious conversations about LGBT+ rights, hate crimes and other similar topics out of sheer, jarring tonal whiplash.

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

Thank you. Must be a very recent development. Had a very progressive sex ed class in college barely two years and half years ago. Didn't mention 'QUILTBAG' at all. Though, thankfully, it did mention asexuals... though that was before I had... admitted to myself that I was one.

I actually only picked up the term this year. From a Webcomic of all things - entitled QUILTBAG. Sadly, the comic kinda crapped out, but it was good while it lasted.

But, while I may be new to the term, I'm an enthusiastic adopter. It is just so much easier to say - quiltbag - than LGBT. For these reasons:

Plus the (obv less important) word nerd benefits! Like the fact that "QUILTBAG" could easily become "quiltbag" once it enters common usage, like SCUBA and LASER did. (If LGBT ever morphed, it'd be like GP -> Jeep, and the best we could hope for would be "legbutt." No thx.) Or the fact that it's two syllables instead of four. Or that the word "quiltbag" is cute.

When I'm speaking aloud, I only say it "quiltbag" rather than the words. Whereas LGBT I say "Ell, Gee, Bee, Tee" which takes twice as long as quiltbag, but says half as much.

Also, I had no idea that Jeep stood for GP. That's really neat! I knew about Laser, but not Scuba. So yay for random word knowledge!

Edit: Speaking of which - what does Scuba stand for? I know I could just google it, but I'm doing other things at the moment.

 

[BaronUberstein]

Bi, and I know my boyfriend certainly is a gamer. A counter-strike nut.

 

[Raikas]

Thank you. Must be a very recent development. Had a very progressive sex ed class in college barely two years and half years ago. Didn't mention 'QUILTBAG' at all. Though, thankfully, it did mention asexuals... though that was before I had... admitted to myself that I was one.

I actually only picked up the term this year. From a Webcomic of all things - entitled QUILTBAG. Sadly, the comic kinda crapped out, but it was good while it lasted.

But, while I may be new to the term, I'm an enthusiastic adopter. It is just so much easier to say - quiltbag - than LGBT.
.

Not to rain on the fun of the name, but there are are fair number of people with intersex conditions who don't actually want to be included in the acronym. In part becuase intersex issues get lumped in with transgender issues, which is (at best) problematic, and in part because a lot of people with disorders of sexual development aren't actually intermediate between male and female, so it's not even an accurate term.

 

[Dr. Pepper Unlimited]

I'll chime in just for the heck of it - Bisexual male who enjoys divulging in the realm of women's clothing. =^_^=

I consider myself an equal opportunity dresser and lover. ^_-

 

[Miss Layton]

snip

Honey, I'm an aspiring writer too. We all do that.

Also, sure thing!

 

[Miss Layton]

I'll chime in just for the heck of it - Bisexual male who enjoys divulging in the realm of women's clothing. =^_^=

I consider myself an equal opportunity dresser and lover. ^_-

One of my favourite sort of persons! *Blows a kiss*

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

Not to rain on the fun of the name, but there are are fair number of people with intersex conditions who don't actually want to be included in the acronym. In part becuase intersex issues get lumped in with transgender issues, which is (at best) problematic, and in part because a lot of people with disorders of sexual development aren't actually intermediate between male and female, so it's not even an accurate term.

Yeah, I've heard some intersex arguments before (prior to me hearing hearing about QUILTBAG, actually, so a couple of years ago at least).

I've heard a lot of arguments about intersex inclusion (for and against) as part of LGBT issues, but here's the thing - I have never once heard FROM anyone intersex (that I know of). I was under the impression that intersex individuals are extremely rare, and that most were surgically modified while very young (babies) to be one or the other (usually due to parental wishes) so that the number of adult intersex individuals was insanely small and thus very difficult to actually gauge on matters of how they wish to be represented.

I personally pretty much avoid getting into arguments either way. If an actual intersex individual wishes to speak to me on the matter, I would welcome it, but until such a person does so, I'm staying FAR out of that one.

 

[Miss Layton]

.>
Can an asexual join the party here?
I was mistaken for gay once, and bullied for it. I try not to dwell on it.

Sure! You're the A in QUILTBAG after all.

... oh right, the thread title says LGBT. See, this is why I prefer QUILTBAG. It handles far more groups.

Thank you. Hmm... I think I can guess what some of 'QUILTBAG' stands for, would you mind clarifying it for me, and others who might be confused by the term?

Thank you.

OT:

I'd love to see games depicting more LGBT characters. Love to see more races depicted in games... and not in stereotypical roles. Love to see more women in games... I'd just love to see more diversity in games, period.

But... given how media has handled, or completely failed to handle depicting asexuals... at all...

I'd suspect that by the time videogames (and most modern media in general, really) start depicting asexuals... just about everything else will have been covered by then... and gone over and explored more thoroughly by the time asexuals get even... a passing reference.

Seriously. Check out the tiny list of examples on the TV Tropes page for asexuals. Its like we don't exist as far as the media is concerned.

And... as I said... I was mistaken for gay once, years ago. I got a taste of the bigotry that the LGBT community is faced with all too often. Still, I'd say even that is better than the greeting most asexuals get: complete denial of our existence.

Let's put it this way... the bigotry, at the very least, is an acknowledgement of your existence. Asexuals like me though? To the 'mainstream'... we'd as well be ghosts from what I can see.


Sorry... didn't meant to go into a somewhat angsty, somewhat repetitive ramble there.

Anyway...

Well... I'm around. My Steam account is the same as my Escapist one. Mostly. If you're playing with someone calling themselves 'Doc' on L4D 1, Killing Floor, Civ 5, Endless Space... etc. that's probably me.

Oh, honey...

*Hugs sympathetically*

Thank you. Hmm... if you'd like to chat with me, feel free to PM me. Fair warning though: I'm an aspiring writer. Just about everything anyone ever says to me has the potential to turn up somewhere in my work.

Honey, all writers do that. Myself included.

 

[Miss Layton]

.>
Can an asexual join the party here?
I was mistaken for gay once, and bullied for it. I try not to dwell on it.

Sure! You're the A in QUILTBAG after all.

... oh right, the thread title says LGBT. See, this is why I prefer QUILTBAG. It handles far more groups.

Plus the (obv less important) word nerd benefits! Like the fact that "QUILTBAG" could easily become "quiltbag" once it enters common usage, like SCUBA and LASER did. (If LGBT ever morphed, it'd be like GP -> Jeep, and the best we could hope for would be "legbutt." No thx.) Or the fact that it's two syllables instead of four. Or that the word "quiltbag" is cute.

The Escapist can at times appear to have an above average LGBT presence. Though I think it may be a trick of perception, as sexuality and gender identity are only really going to be discussed in threads centred around the LGBT community or issues. Naturally these threads will have a larger number of LGBT posters, or at least seam to.

Agreed. Threads about LGBT issues that get a majority of their replies from straight/cis posters (and anything about feminism) strike a very... "different" tone. I don't think the Escapist is more hostile or less diverse than most other sites that cater to the gaming community, but it certainly isn't a bastion of progressive thought either. I'm more than a little surprised that this thread has been so positive and conflict-free so far, to be honest.

Um, ignore that quoted reply, that was a bit of a mistake on my part!

 

[Miss Layton]

There is something I'd like to say... I know the Escapist is also home to all sorts of nasty people. I've seen it first hand, I know. But I like to take to the good with the bad, and so far... I'm honestly convinced there just might be more good than there is bad, here.

I've openly called myself the TransgenderedGamer. So far, no threats, no insults, no jabs, no mud-slinging. Even this thread has been - relatively - conflict free. From this thread, I've made friends with both heterosexual and every other person on the spectrum on this site. On other sites, when I tried something similar, I wasn't given the warmest of receptions, and I was once attacked by the entire community for defending transsexual rights. Wasn't a fun night.

Here... again, yes, such people exist here too. The Escapist might not be a bastion of progressive social relations or politics, and it most definitely has the same sort of whiny, self-important, entitled geeks and nerds who love to throw temper tantrums over little things like Mass Effect 3's ending or the intense prejudice against the "dreaded" casual gamer. That being the case, I've seen and met such wonderful people here that I'm happy to call friends. I've seen a good deal of perfectly rational people.

I posted a thread earlier about my love for a Britcom called League of Gentlemen. Some people commented they didn't like it. Did I argue about it? No. Instead, we discussed why they didn't like it, and they made a series of perfectly valid points.

I'm seeing something quite similar in this thread, and in others.

Yes, not a bastion of progressiveness or anything like that. But even a site that's "relatively" nicer or friendlier than others of its kind on the internet is still something.

Just wanted to chime in.

 

[Raikas]

]

Yeah, I've heard some intersex arguments before (prior to me hearing hearing about QUILTBAG, actually, so a couple of years ago at least).

I've heard a lot of arguments about intersex inclusion (for and against) as part of LGBT issues, but here's the thing - I have never once heard FROM anyone intersex (that I know of). I was under the impression that intersex individuals are extremely rare, and that most were surgically modified while very young (babies) to be one or the other (usually due to parental wishes) so that the number of adult intersex individuals was insanely small and thus very difficult to actually gauge on matters of how they wish to be represented.

I personally pretty much avoid getting into arguments either way. If an actual intersex individual wishes to speak to me on the matter, I would welcome it, but until such a person does so, I'm staying FAR out of that one.

Yeah, I have some personal experience there and I'm not hugely comfortable talking about it, even mostly annonomously online, so yeah, it's complicated. I lean towards avoiding the topic and using really specific medical terms if forced. But that's not ideal either, I know.

That said, in general, disorders of sexual development aren't actually all that uncommon (as a group, there are a lot of uncommon specifics under the umbrella) but even aside from the social stigma involved in saying that you have deformed genitals (or chromosomal differences or whatever), a lot of people really hate the term, and don't want to use "intersex" at all either becuase it's not useful (the tiny handful of times I've "come out" to people they pretty much say "uh, so you had a sex change?" and that's not a fun conversation - and apparently answering "fuck, no!" makes people think you're transphobic, but anyway). I understand the people who use use "hermaphrodite", becuase at least people know what that means.

I mean, in an ideal world visibility and whatever would be good, but we're not there, so I'm always more than a little uncomfortable when people through the "I" into the alphabet soup. But I know plenty of people disagree with me, so hey, it's all good, I guess.

 

[bananafishtoday]

When I'm speaking aloud, I only say it "quiltbag" rather than the words. Whereas LGBT I say "Ell, Gee, Bee, Tee" which takes twice as long as quiltbag, but says half as much.

Also, I had no idea that Jeep stood for GP. That's really neat! I knew about Laser, but not Scuba. So yay for random word knowledge!

Edit: Speaking of which - what does Scuba stand for? I know I could just google it, but I'm doing other things at the moment.

Self-Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus! And as for jeep, humvee had a similar origin (HMMWV--High-Mobility Multi-Purpose Wheeled Vehicle.) Obv people in think-fast talk-fast environments evolve language faster and toward efficiency, and the military is certainly up there in that regard. I swear, when my Army friends talk about their service/job/etc, it's practically a cant! (And as a New Yorker who slurs all their words together to maximize... density I guess, it's something I respect a lot, haha.)

And yeah, I don't know anyone who's masochistic enough to say "Kew you eye ell..." etc aloud. It's more a written thing, especially with stylebooks (super tangent,) like how AP style still demands capital-I Internet even though I and others I know immediately judge anyone who capitalizes "internet" as seriously out of touch with tech and modern culture.

 

[Miss Layton]

Lesbian here! And welcome to The Escapist!

Thanks!

 

[TheDoctor455]

.>
Can an asexual join the party here?
I was mistaken for gay once, and bullied for it. I try not to dwell on it.

Sure! You're the A in QUILTBAG after all.

... oh right, the thread title says LGBT. See, this is why I prefer QUILTBAG. It handles far more groups.

Thank you. Hmm... I think I can guess what some of 'QUILTBAG' stands for, would you mind clarifying it for me, and others who might be confused by the term?

Thank you.

OT:

I'd love to see games depicting more LGBT characters. Love to see more races depicted in games... and not in stereotypical roles. Love to see more women in games... I'd just love to see more diversity in games, period.

But... given how media has handled, or completely failed to handle depicting asexuals... at all...

I'd suspect that by the time videogames (and most modern media in general, really) start depicting asexuals... just about everything else will have been covered by then... and gone over and explored more thoroughly by the time asexuals get even... a passing reference.

Seriously. Check out the tiny list of examples on the TV Tropes page for asexuals. Its like we don't exist as far as the media is concerned.

And... as I said... I was mistaken for gay once, years ago. I got a taste of the bigotry that the LGBT community is faced with all too often. Still, I'd say even that is better than the greeting most asexuals get: complete denial of our existence.

Let's put it this way... the bigotry, at the very least, is an acknowledgement of your existence. Asexuals like me though? To the 'mainstream'... we'd as well be ghosts from what I can see.


Sorry... didn't meant to go into a somewhat angsty, somewhat repetitive ramble there.

Anyway...

Well... I'm around. My Steam account is the same as my Escapist one. Mostly. If you're playing with someone calling themselves 'Doc' on L4D 1, Killing Floor, Civ 5, Endless Space... etc. that's probably me.

Oh, honey...

*Hugs sympathetically*

Thank you. Hmm... if you'd like to chat with me, feel free to PM me. Fair warning though: I'm an aspiring writer. Just about everything anyone ever says to me has the potential to turn up somewhere in my work.

Honey, all writers do that. Myself included.

I know. Didn't know if you were a writer. Felt the warning needed to be there, just in case.

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

Yeah, I have some personal experience there and I'm not hugely comfortable talking about it, even mostly annonomously online, so yeah, it's complicated. I lean towards avoiding the topic and using really specific medical terms if forced. But that's not ideal either, I know.

Yeah. Unlike an actual sexual identity, which is mental, intersex is entirely physical (as far as I know). Which probably explains why even being identified as intersex is unpleasant for some - it isn't something they feel inside.

Still, like with asexuals (see discussion on page 4), it isn't right to pretend that intersex individuals don't exist. Which is why I still prefer to use QUILTBAG, even if it some intersex individuals would rather be ignored.