Anyone else not have crippling self esteem problems?

[The Rockerfly]

Why haven't I?... Last line seriously made me cringe.

Why are we all bragging about high self-esteem?...as if that is what we want, the world to be inhabited by a bunch of people who think highly of themselves, because that's never linked to shitty behaviour or reprehensible personality traits...

People who think highly of themselves are a bummer, they just suck. They're no fun to be around, they're too wrapped up in themselves to realise that they are boring the shit out of you. My friends who hate themselves just a little bit are the best, they have humour, they make an effort...they don't just expect stories about their shitty, boring lives to be enough.

I'm sounding bitter...

I just hate this self-esteem movement that has been going on the last few years. Schools make a special effort to pump up the childrens ego's now, and I don't think it's beneficial.

So you think people would rather hang out with people who are miserable, drags down everyone and cry when one girl rejects them? They are no fun to be around for anyone, even the other people who are miserable because it takes attention away from them

If anything with the increase of emo's I think that more people have a much lower self esteem then before. There is a difference between someone who brags about them self and someone with a high self esteem. Having one is important in my eyes, most people like their friends to be happy, girls like it when a guy has a confident with themselves and job interviewers like an employee who is confident and can talk to people

I can't see a downside to having high self esteem then a few bitter people disliking me, who are so miserable I probably wouldn't want to be around anyone as hey are miserable.

Yes, you do sound bitter. Is it really benefiting you as a person being bitter and hating people who are happy with their lives?

 

[Sexual Harassment Panda]

Why haven't I?... Last line seriously made me cringe.

Why are we all bragging about high self-esteem?...as if that is what we want, the world to be inhabited by a bunch of people who think highly of themselves, because that's never linked to shitty behaviour or reprehensible personality traits...

People who think highly of themselves are a bummer, they just suck. They're no fun to be around, they're too wrapped up in themselves to realise that they are boring the shit out of you. My friends who hate themselves just a little bit are the best, they have humour, they make an effort...they don't just expect stories about their shitty, boring lives to be enough.

I'm sounding bitter...

I just hate this self-esteem movement that has been going on the last few years. Schools make a special effort to pump up the childrens ego's now, and I don't think it's beneficial.

So you think people would rather hang out with people who are miserable, drags down everyone and cry when one girl rejects them? They are no fun to be around for anyone, even the other people who are miserable because it takes attention away from them

If anything with the increase of emo's I think that more people have a much lower self esteem then before. There is a difference between someone who brags about them self and someone with a high self esteem. Having one is important in my eyes, most people like their friends to be happy, girls like it when a guy has a confident with themselves and job interviewers like an employee who is confident and can talk to people

I can't see a downside to having high self esteem then a few bitter people disliking me, who are so miserable I probably wouldn't want to be around anyone as hey are miserable.

Yes, you do sound bitter. Is it really benefiting you as a person being bitter and hating people who are happy with their lives?

I don't have self-esteem issues, I think I'm pretty well balanced...that's my point.

I don't remember saying I "hate" anyone, I just find people with pumped up ego's insufferable...that's all. We're probably both speaking in far to general terms. It's just, if you don't express doubts about yourself and the correctness of your actions...I won't identify with you, you're just not human to me.

I'm not sure I buy the notion that people who do emo fashion have low self-esteem...seems to me that it takes quite a bit of confidence to dress like that and draw so much attention to yourself.

 

[leonnasagawa]

The amount of gamers that have low self esteem are probably the same as the amount of non-gamers that have low self esteem.

 

[Angerwing]

People always thinks that I have self steem issues; but it's just their misconception. I am a person who gets bored of anything I do easily, I am a person who gets tired of anything I do easily as well, and I demand a lot to myself. I always say that I really love myself, but I'm still labeled as someone with low self steem =/

 

[Fetzenfisch]

Well when i graduated with my Abitur

Spoiler

Abitur (from Latin abire = leave, go off) is a designation used in Germany, Finland and Estonia for final exams that pupils take at the end of their secondary education, usually after 12 or 13 years of schooling

i even published a short article in our Abiturnewspaper about how much i rock, with several excamples and quotations of some people about my awesomeness.
[Headline was a simspons quotation: I am so great! I am so great! Everybody loves me, I am so great! ] good ol times

no ... i think my self-esteem is feeling prett-y goood .

 

[Agayek]

A really common occurrence I've noticed here on the Escapist is people complaining about how much they suck. Are self esteem issues something inherent amongst nerds/gamers, or do we just have an over-representation of angsty teens?

Anyway, I was wondering about the flipside of this. The Escapees who think that they're actually awesome.

So Escapist, do you think you are awesome? And why?

Probably way off the current discussion in the thread, but I really can't be bothered to read through the last 6 pages, but here's my take on why there's a perception like that:

Generally, the kind of people who end up being nerds and inhabiting cyberspace are those who have problems assimilating with people in real life. This leads to a lack of self-confidence, because many of the people they interact with face to face don't see much value in them. Then, to make themselves feel better, they complain about it through the only real outlet they have, aka the internet. There's more than likely a large majority of people that fit into this category, but are perfectly healthy and do possess a sense of self worth. They just feel no need to talk about it so you never see threads about how awesome they think they are (not to mention the whole social mores against perceived arrogance that discourages it).

As for what I think about myself: Eh, 'salright. There's a lot of stuff I'm terrible at, but I'm also exceptionally good at a number of things.

I do not feel it is an exaggeration to say I am one of the smartest people I've ever met, as I am able to process information from several different sources simultaneously faster than just about anyone I know can process data from a single source. I am also better than everyone I know at multitasking, to the point where as I'm typing this I'm also planning my schedule for tomorrow and daydreaming about how I would change things in the last book I read.

What I'm bad at: dealing with people. It's not that I don't get along with people so much as I lack anything even vaguely resembling a sense of tact. I refuse to censor myself or lie to people (including those little white lies that make people feel better), so I come across as very blunt and rude. If people can get past the whole "No, I'm not gonna, nor shall I let you, deal with your bullshit" attitude, I get along great with them, but that's like one in every 10,000 people. Plus I'm exceptionally bad at small-talk. I can't keep a conversation going to save my life.

 

[Agayek]

I run my own business
I have a good looking girlfriend
I have a lot of friends
Girls check me out occasionally and I rejected 2 girls recently
I work out
I can write music of all varieties
I have a black belt in Tai-Kwan-do

I can safely say I have high self esteem and I am happy with what I have done with my life to this date.
I have shown I can do all this in 18 years so why haven't you?

Because all of that takes a colossal amount of work, and the vast majority of it just isn't worth the effort. You can be Mr. Awesome your whole life, and you'll be forgotten just like Joe Everyman within a few decades, and you'll have about as much impact on society as he will.

Edit:

So you think people would rather hang out with people who are miserable, drags down everyone and cry when one girl rejects them? They are no fun to be around for anyone, even the other people who are miserable because it takes attention away from them

If anything with the increase of emo's I think that more people have a much lower self esteem then before. There is a difference between someone who brags about them self and someone with a high self esteem. Having one is important in my eyes, most people like their friends to be happy, girls like it when a guy has a confident with themselves and job interviewers like an employee who is confident and can talk to people

I can't see a downside to having high self esteem then a few bitter people disliking me, who are so miserable I probably wouldn't want to be around anyone as hey are miserable.

Yes, you do sound bitter. Is it really benefiting you as a person being bitter and hating people who are happy with their lives?

This is probably just arguing semantics, and it's 5 AM and I haven't slept yet so feel free to ignore this, but I have to say that people with high self-esteem are indeed highly aggravating. Typically along with a high opinion of themselves comes a degree of nihilism that makes dealing with them a trial.

What is important for people to have is self-knowledge/awareness. People need to be aware of both their strengths and their weaknesses, and act accordingly. Be assertive when in a situation that plays to your strengths, but be able to know when you're out of your depth and let others take over. I've found that people familiar enough with themselves to be confident in their skills, yet humble enough to know their limits are much easier to deal with.

 

[Angerwing]

Why haven't I?... Last line seriously made me cringe.

Why are we all bragging about high self-esteem?...as if that is what we want, the world to be inhabited by a bunch of people who think highly of themselves, because that's never linked to shitty behaviour or reprehensible personality traits...

People who think highly of themselves are a bummer, they just suck. They're no fun to be around, they're too wrapped up in themselves to realise that they are boring the shit out of you. My friends who hate themselves just a little bit are the best, they have humour, they make an effort...they don't just expect stories about their shitty, boring lives to be enough.

I'm sounding bitter...

I just hate this self-esteem movement that has been going on the last few years. Schools make a special effort to pump up the childrens ego's now, and I don't think it's beneficial.

Except here's the thing: I don't talk about myself nonstop in real life. In fact, people who aren't personally close to me don't actually know that much about my life. The people I work with (who I spend over 40 hours a week with) don't know shit about my past, or my REAL personality. People happy with themselves aren't necessarily arrogant douchebag jerks. I've spent a lot of time around both the mopey and the happy, and in my experience, the happy win 10 times out of 10.

 

[kiteboy]

i like me, i have a solid girlfriend of 2 years and ride for a kitesurfing shop

games are good too!

 

[Krantos]

OT: I used to be really self-conscious, but then I became a manager at my job and I realized I had to get past that. I don't think I'm awesome by any means, but I've realized that I am competent and that I can be relied on when needed.

 

[caselj01]

My awesomness can cut through steel plate at 900 yards. Fact.

 

[The Rockerfly]

le snip

I agree but that is a very nihilistic view on things. I will have a happy life and and to me that's all I care about

I don't have self-esteem issues, I think I'm pretty well balanced...that's my point.

I don't remember saying I "hate" anyone, I just find people with pumped up ego's insufferable...that's all. We're probably both speaking in far to general terms. It's just, if you don't express doubts about yourself and the correctness of your actions...I won't identify with you, you're just not human to me.

I'm not sure I buy the notion that people who do emo fashion have low self-esteem...seems to me that it takes quite a bit of confidence to dress like that and draw so much attention to yourself.

I think what you are both mistaking me for is someone who constantly talks about themselves and I agree that does annoy me too and there is a difference between someone with a high self esteem and an annoying douche

Kinda like this guy

I know a couple of emo's and all of them have low self esteem and are confused with who they are, so they dress in a way that makes them feel accepted by a group

 

[Agayek]

I think what you are both mistaking me for is someone who constantly talks about themselves and I agree that does annoy me too and there is a difference between someone with a high self esteem and an annoying douche

Kinda like this guy

I know a couple of emo's and all of them have low self esteem and are confused with who they are, so they dress in a way that makes them feel accepted by a group

Like I said, I was/am probably arguing semantics as I'm exhausted and not really functioning all that well. I just tend to perceive "high self-esteem" as borderline arrogance/nihilism, while "self-awareness" as a more admirable state of being. It doesn't really matter though.

Edit: Somewhat more alert version: I think we're trying to convey the same idea and arguing over the specific words used.

 

[The Rockerfly]

Like I said, I was/am probably arguing semantics as I'm exhausted and not really functioning all that well. I just tend to perceive "high self-esteem" as borderline arrogance/nihilism, while "self-awareness" as a more admirable state of being. It doesn't really matter though.

Edit: Somewhat more alert version: I think we're trying to convey the same idea and arguing over the specific words used.

Not entirely sure where you are getting nihilism from high self esteem otherwise I would agree

 

[GrinningManiac]

Yup, no self esteem deficit here

MY problem is immaturity and poor emotional development. I don't know how to take a compliment (I confused someone complimenting my haircut when I chided them for not noticing sooner. Bit of a dick move, in retrospect) and I struggle to accept that other people have opinions different to mine.

When it comes to self-confidence, though, I'm either confident or aware enough to ACT confident

 

[snowman6251]

I am the shit because I don't take shit.

 

[Continuity]

I'm awesome.

However I won't qualify that by saying in what way I'm awesome.

Though frankly its all pretty depressing (life) so its no wonder so many people ***** and moan about it. I'm not moaning, though its hard not to think about how petty most of our lives will turn out to be.