Are relationships overated?
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They are when you're getting dumped. But the nice moments rank among the highlights of human existence.
For me I thought I had a good one then alil distance between us and it falls apart and now I'm freinds with a few girls at my college and I've been around long enough to see them go out with people we're their relationships rose and fell like civilazations so yeah relationships/dating is overrate. The system is screwed anyway "I'm going to be freinds with you for 3 months but go out with this person I met 2 days ago." WTF! I'm a straight male by the way.
About 4 years ago I got with a guy who I believed was the one I was going to be with for the rest of my life. Well, our relationship was turning out really bad and I wasn't happy and I knew that he wasn't happy either. I didn't want to be alone though so I didn't do anything about it. I wanted to know there was someone there and I was so scared of never finding the right one for me.
Well, he left me. And I can't tell you how much more free that made me feel. I realized that if you are in an unhappy relationship, your life is gonna be miserable.
As long as you are happy, there is no need to force yourself into a bad relationship or stay in a bad relationship if you are unhappy.
I am now with a wonderful boyfriend who treats me a million times better then my last and I couldn't be happier.
I see so many people who force themselves to stay with someone when they or their partner are not happy because they are scared of being alone or can't function without that person.
I may have rambled a bit...
oh well.
Pretty much... if you can find happiness in a relationship, that is awesome!
If you are single, there are other ways of finding happiness. A relationship does not mean happiness.
Well, he left me. And I can't tell you how much more free that made me feel. I realized that if you are in an unhappy relationship, your life is gonna be miserable.
As long as you are happy, there is no need to force yourself into a bad relationship or stay in a bad relationship if you are unhappy.
I am now with a wonderful boyfriend who treats me a million times better then my last and I couldn't be happier.
I see so many people who force themselves to stay with someone when they or their partner are not happy because they are scared of being alone or can't function without that person.
I may have rambled a bit...
oh well.
Pretty much... if you can find happiness in a relationship, that is awesome!
If you are single, there are other ways of finding happiness. A relationship does not mean happiness.
Yes they are. We've been conditioned to seek them out and peer pressure in school doesn't help, but in the end relationships aren't necessary for happiness.
Sure, they're a source of happiness, but it's entirely possible to live a rich, full life while forever remaining single.
Sure, they're a source of happiness, but it's entirely possible to live a rich, full life while forever remaining single.
I'd say it's not as simple as saying "they're overrated". Yes, society pushes us to be in relationships due to an outdated concern for keeping the birthrate up and continuing the species... and some people only enter into relationships because of that pressure.
On the flip side, some people seem to be born anxious and co-dependent. For those people, I'd say relationships aren't overrated.
Personally, I'm in a relationship that started more out of a mix of compassion and desire... and it's turning into a headache. I've never been the guy who wants to have a "significant other", I really miss the days when I just had a string of casual fuck-buddies.
On the flip side, some people seem to be born anxious and co-dependent. For those people, I'd say relationships aren't overrated.
Personally, I'm in a relationship that started more out of a mix of compassion and desire... and it's turning into a headache. I've never been the guy who wants to have a "significant other", I really miss the days when I just had a string of casual fuck-buddies.
I have accepted the possibility that I could very well go through my entire life without being in a relationship. Since I'm 19 I'm sure that opinion will change in the future. I do love the idea of a relationship, especially the ones done right. I don't believe there is a the one out there for me, I just have to find a girl I like and date em. Scott Pilgrim showed me that your perfect other doesn't have to have your personality or beliefs, as long as you love each other you'll get through.
its human nature- we're built to want to have a significant other se we can breed and make more people.
But as always there's exceptions to the rule- some people dont feel that need as strongly as others, and some people feel the need but get frustrated that they cant fulfil it, so they try and bury it.
But as always there's exceptions to the rule- some people dont feel that need as strongly as others, and some people feel the need but get frustrated that they cant fulfil it, so they try and bury it.
The society and media makes romantic relationships out to be these wonderful, godly experiences that are the ultimate goal of any rational human being. You know those teenage dramas where a guy/girl keeps vying for the attention of another guy/girl and they become their most elated when they finally reach that point of "going steady" (or actually having sex, depending upon what show you're watching)? That is all crap.
Also, I feel like the idea of relationships and sex being synonymous is fallacious to begin with. We live in the age of a variety of birth control/STD prevention methods so sex is rapidly abundant for those who want it bad enough and are prepared to handle the risks.
As for love... well love is a tricky one. Many claim to be in love when they are in a relationship but true love is probably the kind of love that refuses to be broken. So, relationships that end probably end because true love was never really present, while relationships that last until both members shrivel up and die has to be a sign of something otherworldly, in my opinion.
Maybe I'm just jaded after being through two serious relationships built upon copious amounts of self-delusion, denial and guilt but relationships are not the wondrous things they are played up to be. Serious Relationships should be left to those who have agreed plans to get married (or some other kind of lifetime bond, perhaps a business merger) whilst anyone with doubts as to where there romantic feelings lie should stick to the casual relationships. Well, maybe thats not fair to try and push that kind of mentality on others but it works for me.
Also, I feel like the idea of relationships and sex being synonymous is fallacious to begin with. We live in the age of a variety of birth control/STD prevention methods so sex is rapidly abundant for those who want it bad enough and are prepared to handle the risks.
As for love... well love is a tricky one. Many claim to be in love when they are in a relationship but true love is probably the kind of love that refuses to be broken. So, relationships that end probably end because true love was never really present, while relationships that last until both members shrivel up and die has to be a sign of something otherworldly, in my opinion.
Maybe I'm just jaded after being through two serious relationships built upon copious amounts of self-delusion, denial and guilt but relationships are not the wondrous things they are played up to be. Serious Relationships should be left to those who have agreed plans to get married (or some other kind of lifetime bond, perhaps a business merger) whilst anyone with doubts as to where there romantic feelings lie should stick to the casual relationships. Well, maybe thats not fair to try and push that kind of mentality on others but it works for me.
They aren't obligatory for happiness. But neither overrated.
Both sides can be fullfilling and fun. Both have their downsides. Just don't stress yourself out "oh i have to have a gf/bf or my friends and family think i am weird" if thats true, give your friends and family a good powerfull kick in the nuts. Because they all arent worth your time.
If you just think like that. Don't worry, be happy man! Live your life, stroll along the weeks passing. And just look out what happens. This isnt a thing that can be planned. It just..happens.
Both sides can be fullfilling and fun. Both have their downsides. Just don't stress yourself out "oh i have to have a gf/bf or my friends and family think i am weird" if thats true, give your friends and family a good powerfull kick in the nuts. Because they all arent worth your time.
If you just think like that. Don't worry, be happy man! Live your life, stroll along the weeks passing. And just look out what happens. This isnt a thing that can be planned. It just..happens.
I think they are completely pushed on us, specifically to women. I mean we are trained since birth to want to be a good wife and mother to our future progeny. I think its a little gross really. I know the opposite would be just as bad. In college I was looked down at for wanting to get married and raise children rather than being a gung ho career lady. Social conditioning just is that way though, I guess someone has to be trained to take a sort of backseat or support system.
If your in a relationship with someone as invested in said relationship as you though, its definitely not overrated. Been with my now husband since sophomore year of high school, through long distance relationship in college and now away from home for me for the first time in my life. There is something to be said for compatibility but for us its been about adapting to each other when the other changes. We've gone through rough patches but we value each other and what we have enough to compromise.
So if ya got what I got, your incredibly lucky and its not overrated in the least.
If your in a relationship with someone as invested in said relationship as you though, its definitely not overrated. Been with my now husband since sophomore year of high school, through long distance relationship in college and now away from home for me for the first time in my life. There is something to be said for compatibility but for us its been about adapting to each other when the other changes. We've gone through rough patches but we value each other and what we have enough to compromise.
So if ya got what I got, your incredibly lucky and its not overrated in the least.
Relationships are fun for me because it's a source of sex and social activity.pulse2 said:Okay, before I get verbally attacked (something people tend to do frequently on the internet without first attempting to understand), this isn't a form of trolling, its just something that's been bugging me. For the record I'm happily in one and even so much as considering the big M in a few years or so.
Here we go, basically I'm asking if we put too much credibility and importance into having and being in a relationship, of course it is the basic fundamental part of human existance and its all part of love etc, but is it the be all and end all is what I'm getting at. We spend an incredible amount of time thinking about it and quite often it upsets us or leaves us an emotional shell because it isn't going the way we'd like. For some it comes easy, for others it is hellish. Not always does the problem stem from self esteem, sometimes it could just be someone's lack of luck to find someone fitting of thier personality and other times its because a majority of people just don't find them attractive for some reason or another (I won't go into details). So for people who are not in a relationship, is it really so important that they be in one in order to find happiness?
Quite often we say that we are not complete until we find our other half, but are we saying this because we are in love or because it's true? And if it's true, why is it so easy to decide on a divorce or break-up as soon as things get slightly bumpy?
There is tremendous pressure on those who are not in relationships to be in one, all thier friends and family are in one and they keep asking you when you too will be in one, like as if its as crucial as breathing. But is it so wrong to choose not to be in one? What is a person who is not in a relationship missing out on and are they incomplete as a person? Is there no other means to find inner happiness then through a relationship?
So yeah, if, you're still with me, that's the question, what's your opinion
Fuck all that emotional love shit, I want to enjoy it, and I think it's the healthiest attitude for it, as well.
Also, it's impossible to find a perfect one.Teiraa said:
If you're asexual, it sure as hell ain't the most important thing ever, seeing as breeding isn't top of the agenda.
I do think that the companionship is worth it if you can find someone worth being with. It can get lonely when everyone you know pairs off.
- Mar 31, 2010
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Ha, if I was you I wouldn't worry about never being in a relationship, because however crazy/ugly/unattractive/shy/lonesome you may consider yourself there are so many other people out there that there is bound to be someone who will be a close enough match for yourself. Put enough effort in and eventually there should be a pay-out ;-)Grabbin Keelz said:
OT: I'm still young and not experienced in serious relationships, but currently I'm happy being single. I have faith that knowing my personality, when the time comes in a few years when I actually want a serious relationship that I'll be able to find one. I don't think they're over-rated, but there's nothing wrong with being single either if you haven't met a compatible person yet.
only been in a handful during my 25 year life (of which, only been actually going out with people since I was 16-17) and I can tell you this... Yes, much of the time they'll be over-rated and not worth it at all. Finding that one special time makes it all worthwhile though... just don't go and fuck it up like I did and lose him/her.