pulse2 said:
Relationships, fantastic! From what I understand OP, correct me if I'm wrong, you're refering to the 'partner'-esque relationship, right? Well I'll press on that topic in a moment, but I'd like to add that besides relationships being 'character building', as I think most people here will attest to, what amazes me is that even bad dynamics between people cannot prevent great relationships from existing between them.
I guess this is one of the unwritten benefits of going to university and living alongside people you wouldn't normally come into contact with; you build relationships with all sorts of people. In my case, I enjoy many hetrosexual relationships with male friends of various ages despite some of them holding views that are anaethma to my own style (and I not just talking about fashion-sense here).
In fact, the more 'clash', the more I learn about myself and my own perceptions/prejudices. Let's face it, if we're just hanging round with people like ourselves then the expression "to walk a mile in his shoes" just loses all meaning and we stagnate rather than have the thrilling, exhilarating (and yes, I'll admit, at times arousing) experience of someone up in your face letting you know, reminding you, they count just as much as the next man/woman. You ever had that daydream where you imagine everyone else in the world was a clone of you and then a second later you think how
boring that would be? This is why; because love 'em or hate 'em dammit, there are some interesting people out there and life would be no fun without a few personal heroes and villains.
Now, about 'partners', what significance does their relationship hold? Well, to start from the earliest point imaginable, I wouldn't be here if wasn't for a treasured feeling of love between two people so I guess I've got an awful lot to be thankful for. Couples operate in different ways, some finish each other's sentences, some squabble over who would win in a fight between She-Ra and He-Man, but most would agree that their differences are worth, if this isn't already, as I mentioned earlier, what attracted them to each other in the first place and what continues to add the 'spice' to their relationship. Put simply, (and I don't know why I'm saying this since you already know it, being so close to the big M and all, congratulations by the way! Side question: did you pop the question or did your partner?) most couples have weighed the pros and cons and decided it's worth the risk.
But what about, as I think your OP alludes to, when 'pressure' comes into 'couple' relationships? Either forcing people to stay together in a destructive relationship or for otherwise contented singles to pine after the 'comfort' of such a relationship. That's a scary one but it's one where the strength of the overlapping relationships that an individual is involved in come into play. Having the 'network' of people who care about you makes all the difference when it comes to pressure.
We tend to subconciously group off our friends into the 'couples' and the 'singles' and the 'workmates' and the 'teammates' ...etc but when it comes to looking at ourselves we often use the 'fairytale' group for comparison. When looking and relationships we dwell on the happy couples rather than on our equally happy single friends. When worrying about our health we look to the few super-buff members of the team rather than our equally flabby workmates - it's just conditioning that we instinctively compare ourselves with the veneer of the 'ideal' rather than reality. And hopefully, if your 'network' is big enough, you'll have a few obnoxious friends to tell you that
