Are you socially awkward by choice?

RaphaelsRedemption

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I'm good at social stuff. But I think that's because I work at it. It's important enough for me that I make the effort. However, I am socially isolated. I have few friends. And that, I think is because, while I can make the effort initially, I struggle to trust anyone with anything more than the most superficial of my secrets and personality.
 

Drakmeire

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Gennadios said:
I don't think any of 'yall are describing being socially awkward. Being socially picky about the company you keep is a different thing. Being socially awkward usually means you either don't have enough clout/self esteem to choose who you associate with and go for whoever's comfortable or available, or you're so f*cked that most people just stay away from you.

For the record, as long as one's comfortable with who they are, having oddball interests or outlooks isn't a problem, it helps set one apart.
I just see a lot of people here claiming to be socially awkward, It's not really a label you'd ever give yourself since it's about how others see you. I'm good with people but I try not to associate with people that I do not like and will actively by awkward around them to ensure that I'm not in their circles. Due to this behavior I am almost always considered to be socially awkward by my peers and have even been tested for personality disorders (I passed every test with flying colors) your personality and choices seem to mean nothing in how other view you and I'm viewed as "Socially awkward".
Although my cynicism may be attributed to seeing the darker side of people since all through school I had a severe stutter which I only recently overcame. As a result, I have a talent for reading people and can tell if they are the types that would have teased and bullied me for being different... It's more people than you would think.
 

Fiz_The_Toaster

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Gennadios said:
I don't think any of 'yall are describing being socially awkward. Being socially picky about the company you keep is a different thing. Being socially awkward usually means you either don't have enough clout/self esteem to choose who you associate with and go for whoever's comfortable or available, or you're so f*cked that most people just stay away from you.

For the record, as long as one's comfortable with who they are, having oddball interests or outlooks isn't a problem, it helps set one apart.
I can't speak for everyone here, but for me, I am socially awkward. I panic if I have to have small talk with someone I kinda know or don't know at all. I don't talk to people I don't know very well, or at all, because I come across very awkward and forcing a conversation since it sounds like I'm trying way too hard.

Hell I'm awkward with my friends, who think it's cute, when I talk to them. I agree that some people claim to be socially awkward only because they will not talk to anyone that doesn't interest them, but there are some of us that would rather avoid the whole talking thing because it freaks us the hell out.
 

Redlin5_v1legacy

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I'm not socially awkward normally. I can usually talk to people unless they get very hostile and I'm not about to stay friendless in new surroundings.
 

NeoShinGundam

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"It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious." - Oscar Wilde

Socially awkward would be staring at the floor while you talk because you're too nervous to look people in the eye. I know the geeks & nerds (the "core demographic" of video games) have a reputation for being awkward, and it's a stereotype that's been difficult to shake. Personally, I think most people just have bad habits that they choose not to change.
 

chaosyoshimage

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Yeah, I choose not to have any friends...

Actually, I'm not really socially awkward, just horribly uncomfortable in social situations, I handle myself relatively well. I put on a show and all that, but I'm totally dead on the inside...
 

Bucky01

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its weird i hate most people i see, but i would like to be social if i had the chance, but i can never bring myself to starting conversations or the ability to maintain conversations, even if its a topic i know lots about or enjoy D:
 

Pegghead

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I tend to find it hard to dislike most people when I don't really know much about them, so I find I can get along quite well with those I don't really know (but usually only when I'm with I know, going solo can be a little awkward depending on circumstance). I've had friendships grow out of simply being the first two guys to get to class in high-school day 1 and quite alot of the friends I have now I met through friends I'd already made...but maybe that's just the way it goes when you're in high-school :/.

Maybe it's just because I know what it's like to both not have friends and be stuck with "friends" that keep you around only to treat you like a door-mat, but I'm very grateful to be in social situations. Honestly I'm surprised by so many people here talking about how socially awkward they are, you guys are pretty awesome, and it sucks that others can't get to appreciate that.
 

derbt

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Being socially awkward and being an introvert really are two different things. I'm an introvert, but I'm not socially awkward. I simply don't enjoy the company of others as much as I enjoy being alone, though my reasons are different to yours. I don't dislike the majority of people I meet - I'm just not interested.
 

Eclectic Dreck

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I am not really socially awkward. I do have a fair amount of discomfort when dealing with new groups of people but I suspect that is normal. What I am not sure is normal is feeling greater discomfort among a crowd of absolute strangers who have no need to make an impression upon in any way (e.g. I am terribly uncomfortable when walking through a mall by myself).
 

Nouw

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When I am socially awkward, it's not by choice I can assure you.
 

Wuggy

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I'm somewhat socially awkward, and it's certainly not by choice. It's because I'm shy and silent around people I don't know. I go to a sub-conscious mode of "don't make a sound unless they talk to you directly". I don't like a lot of people, but I do get along with them.
 

OrokuSaki

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I tend to be "Socially awkward" because I have self esteem issues. I tend to assume that nobody wants to speak with me so I don't talk to them unless spoken to. But once a conversation starts I tend to be my normal self. But once it ends it's back to awkward silence. Even if I've spoken to the person 1,000 times I still don't start a conversation unless it's important.

It leads to my best friends texting me once every 3 months to ask why they haven't heard from me.
 

infohippie

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As an introvert myself, I find it's great to meet new people and talk with them for a couple of minutes. Then I've run out of non-trivial things to say to them and I don't see any point whatsoever in talking about the more trivial stuff, so I shut up and stand around awkwardly for a bit. Then it's time for me to go somewhere away from people to recharge for a while. Introverts tend to get mentally and/or emotionally tired out by dealing with other people and need alone time to ground themselves. It's the other way around for extroverts.
 

Kae

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Well, I've always been socially awkward, ever since I was on kindergarten I've had trouble talking to people and making friends, I don't know why but when I'm around people I get nervous and start talking weird in a nigh incomprehensible mess or words will simply not come out of my mouth, so I would say that it's definitely not by choice but I do take it as a trade off for being attractive and having slightly above average intelligence (just a little bit), though if that was the case why am I also so damned clumsy? I can't take 5 steps without tripping with something...
 

Swny Nerdgasm

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DustyDrB said:
A lot of people here seem to be the type that will sit silently in a corner and think of ways to kill you for no reason other than you're another human being.

Me? I get along with everyone. Always have. I'm also an optimist and think people are generally good.
I'm gonna agree with this guy right here, but I've noticed that some people that I know in real life say that they're socially akward by choice, but it seems more likely those people are just trying to cover up for being socially and emotionally crippled by nature.