Bad Translator

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Jowe

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May 26, 2010
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All the games I tried were pretty boring, but "Fuck you machines" goes to "trees"
 

BlueOnBlue

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Jan 29, 2010
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"behind you under the door below the roof, malevolent beings roam."

becomes:

"Nenfwd ÐåãèñòðàöèÿDrws JNJNðàçìåðäàííûõJJ."

I really don't know how this happend.
 

ejb626

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Aug 6, 2009
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YES you found it, this was linked on another forum I was lurking a few weeks ago and I had fun playing around with it but then I promptly forgot what the site was called I'm bookmarking it this time.

I saw the Westboro Baptist Church headline below so I typed in "Fred Phelps in a fucking douchebag" it came out as "Fred Phelps is fucking disgusting" which I would still agree with
 

Mr.PlanetEater

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May 17, 2009
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On a non-game related note, Teddy Roosevelt quotes are fucking gold. Just look at this;

"Germany has reduced savagery to a science, and this great war for the victorious peace of justice must go on until the German cancer is cut clean out of the world body. "

...56 Google Translations later we get;

"Germany and the German government, vyolatyons human rights and rule of law and the struggle for world power konkver, and mitigatyon contribution to reducing energy konsumptyon."

What does that even mean?

Oh and 'I am the greatest fireman.' turns into

"I was a major fire."
 

let's rock

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Jun 15, 2011
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Just saying, due to the differences in most languages, literal translations doing this don't suprise me. I know one anami, it's theme song, when literaly transtated, once, says "you can fly hi, let's get naked" No, it isn't henti. The extreme differences in how words are used in japanese and english cause different interpertations of them. If not directly translated, it would talk about being a free and outgoing. so if that is how extremely off one translation can be, what the hell did you expect to get after 56? So yes, this thing is funny, but not a "bad" translator
 

The Rogue Wolf

Stealthy Carnivore
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Nov 25, 2007
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So I decided to try a classic television theme-song lyric:

"The weather started getting rough, the tiny ship was tossed. If not for the courage of the fearless crew, the Minnow would be lost!"

What did I get back?

"The first brick. If you go, do not worry, the team loses!"

...yeah, I got nothin'.
 

Riccan

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Oct 11, 2009
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Original text: I am the one who ate the bear.

Translation: 01:00

How the hell...?
 

Naeo

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Dec 31, 2008
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This one was amazing.

Penis wizard -> Cock wizard(x2) -> Wizard cock(x3) -> Master cock(x3) -> Main valve(x4) -> Valve Key -> Key Valve(x3) -> Valve key (x4) -> Valve button(x2) -> Button valve(x2) -> Valve button(x3) -> Alarm button(x23) -> Panic button(x6).

More amazingly,
"I just had sex" -> "I love sex".

"I threw it on the ground" -> "They are on the ground" (because I threw them there)

"I stuck my dick in a blender" -> "Members of the media". Somewhere in there was "I am a member of the Halo media", with "Halo" being, yes, capitalized.

"Fucking magnets, how do they work?" -> "Magnesium in the world" (doesn't sound right. Must have been a scientist who said that one)

"I'm on a boat" -> "The board of directors" (should probably know what I'm doing on company time)
 

Nightshine

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Dec 23, 2009
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Original text:

"Devil May Cry"

...56 translations later Google gives us:

"No international broadcaster of the devil."

:>
 

DirgeNovak

I'm anticipating DmC. Flame me.
Jul 23, 2008
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"Oblivion" became "Amnesty". Kind of not the same thing
"God of War" became "Teacher". I give this one 5 stars.
"Uncharted" became "Empty". I disagree.
"Resident Evil" stayed "Resident Evil". For some reason.
"Silent Hill" became "However, in the mountains". Wonder where the comma came from.
"Ratchet and Clank Future: Tools of Destruction" became "Carver and light and destroy the fishermen Tools". Gold star.
"Arkham Asylum" became "Department Alkameurooy psitshyatri". I'm not joking.
"Red Dead Redemption" became "Buy Red". It became that in Hungarian. Them greedy Hungarians!
"Shadow of the Colossus" became "Max Dell". This is getting silly.
"Heavy Rain" became "Children". This thing is creepy.
"Condemned" became "Religion".

Okay, I'm officially bored.
 

mik1

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Dec 7, 2009
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Ok this is the most obscure one I got after a few tries

Baby don't hurt me.
to
poor people.
 

WaywardHaymaker

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Aug 21, 2009
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You're not even alive. Not really. You're just a machine, and machines can be broken!

Becomes:

Of course, Yanpahnatak!

Are you dense? Are you retarded or something? Who the hell do you think I am? I'm the goddamn BATMAN!

Becomes:

Oh, you crazy? My Band? Let me tell you, Batman!

What ain't no country I ever heard of, they speak English in What?

Becomes:

United Kingdom, we learned?

Also...

English, ************! Do you speak it?

Becomes:

This is not true! Hello,

I did not hit her, it's not true. It's bullshit! I did not hit her. I did NOT. Oh, hi, Mark.

Becomes:

If it does happen! I do not understand, Mark.

Best one, though:

Card games on motorcycles! >> Card games on motorbikes! >> Motorcycle on the card game? >> Motorcycles in the card game? >> Motorcycle card game? >> Motorbike racing? >> Racing bikes? >> Racing wheels? >> Racing wheel? >> Steering wheel? >> Handlebars? >> Steering wheel? >> Navigation? >> Movement?
 

Romblen

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Oct 10, 2009
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I'm the batman
He said the Army

Don't blink. Don't even blink. Blink and you're dead. They are fast, faster than you could believe, don't turn your back, don't look away, and don't blink. Good luck.
Do not waste your time, your return on Investment (mirror), performance data, the first year of congratulations, "do not blink, do not worry to death.
 

Ionait

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Aug 18, 2008
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"Wild Arms Second Ignition"

...56 translations later Google gives us:

"(Monday), "natural"."

"My Sims Kingdom"

...56 translations later Google gives us:

"American Missimer"

"Why am I browsing the Escapist when I should be working?"

...56 translations later Google gives us:

"This is not the first time it?"
 

Uber Evil

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Mar 4, 2009
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Original text:

"Do the electric boogaloo."

...56 translations later Google gives us:

"He has power over the drum."

Um, what?

Rage face goes to Ira.
 

chowderface

New member
Nov 18, 2009
327
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"Don't cross the streams"
"Change"

"I can't make decisions on my own, I'm an elected official"
"You decide"

"Ludicrous speed"
"rates"

What follows is a couple different versions of my favorite Homestar Runner quote. First the original (sans a couple of interruptions from another character):

"Long pants, Strong Bad, the longest pants! Everybody everybody longest pants! Long long long long long long pants! Long my pants! Gleaming pants! Glorious pants!"

And then:

"Shorts (Thursday), กางเกงเลวรายเกนไป! Pants! Care! tkmkagekgkayaw pants! Kagekgega kingdom!"

"Clothing, not good! Pants! Kagekgkag ฉ up! Kagekg แฟ INS! Pants, great! LP - Kagekgkayaw!" (on this one I saw "Pants, bright and shiny" go by a couple times, that was fun)

And my personal favorite:

"Everything wrong Trousers! Great ass! Pants! Great pants! Pants, you!"
 

Hoiguyyami

New member
Jun 17, 2009
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"This is a terrible translator. It keeps making things sound terrible"

...56 translations later Google gives us:

"Signal. I feel small. ""


I... I dont even know what to say to that.