'Be a man'!

[Niorff]

I'm tired of gender-specific roles and expectations. These stereotypes, and society aren't helping, they're only enforcing these ideas.

We're all human, therefore we're all capable of feeling a broad spectrum of emotion. Why should we suppress, deny or be embarrassed of showing or feeling these emotions?

Because we need it ?
Gender specifications have existed for thousand years, and I think we still could benefit from that. Growing up with a loving mother and a strict but just father (just stereotypes here) is a good way to become a responsible adult. Can't find the good words there but you see what I mean.
Men should stick to their role in public, what they do alone is not our business. Something like that.

We don't need it to the point in which people suppress or hide their emotions. Or to the point that it's only acceptable to do or feel certain things if you are a certain sex.

A loving mother can be the one who also brings home the money. A strict father can still show emotion. Becoming a responsible adult goes far beyond gender specifications or expectations. I'm not saying it shouldn't exist, at all, but to this extent? No, it shouldn't.

Actually me neither, but my english is too rusty to express the 'subtlety' of my opinion.
I'm just saying that you can't expect to have positive reactions to an inadequate behavior, i.e. crying about stuff you can cope with. I'm definitely not in favor of the ambient pussyfication of the young. Not saying it's not ok to let go in difficult times. I've done it too, of course. But I'd rather know someone who fights and overcome his troubles than someone who cries about it, hoping someone will help.

 

[zombiesinc]

Actually me neither, but my english is too rusty to express the 'subtlety' of my opinion.
I'm just saying that you can't expect to have positive reactions to an inadequate behavior, i.e. crying about stuff you can cope with. I'm definitely not in favor of the ambient pussyfication of the young. Not saying it's not ok to let go in difficult times. I've done it too, of course. But I'd rather know someone who fights and overcome his troubles than someone who cries about it, hoping someone will help.

That's a good point. I think that stems from a lot of different things, mainly concerning parenting. These children who are either left to run wild, or 'baby'd aren't able to properly understand or cope with their feelings. They tend to be the ones who cry out for attention, or can't realize what a genuine struggle is.

Anyways, I don't support people whining about petty issues simply because they can, but I also don't support this mentality that certain sexes should act or feel a certain way.

 

[Niorff]

That's a good point. I think that stems from a lot of different things, mainly concerning parenting. These children who are either left to run wild, or 'baby'd aren't able to properly understand or cope with their feelings. They tend to be the ones who cry out for attention, or can't realize what a genuine struggle is.

Anyways, I don't support people whining about petty issues simply because they can, but I also don't support this mentality that certain sexes should act or feel a certain way.

Yup, that would be the spirit. Plus the fact that I obviously don't care that the expression is to 'man it up'. I always find feminism laughably moronic when it comes to language. Respect is a question of attitude, not words. Same goes for homophobia. I'll never call a homosexual a ******, but yeah, I'll call my hetero friends by that name, for fun.
People nowadays need to get over self-censorship, really.
Sorry for the digression -_-

 

[Spinozaad]

Last time i checked men can cry. Yes belive it or not its true we do have tear ducts and feelings!

:O WHAT???????
well this is news to me!
naw I kid
guys need to stop just having a hard outside when it comes to feelings.

Why? You can just as validly state that 'girls need to stop crying over every petty emotion', and it would be as true.

Why should 'showing your emotions' be better? Psychologists (for as much as you can rely on them, anyway) are still out on the question whether or not crying is 'better' for you.

Personally I'd say that showing emotions, including tears, is okay given the right circumstance. A man can mourn his loved ones. A man can cry manly tears of joy after overcoming life itself and winning the grand finale.

A man should not victimize himself, only to leech (false) sympathy from his surrounding. Or, you know, the Emo-way of doing things. Tears to show 'that you're so emotional' is retarded.

 

[Crystal Cuckoo]

Correction:

 

[Arkhangelsk]

To quote Chef Morgan: "The only time it's manly to cry, is when stabbing something with a knife!"

 

[Outright Villainy]

All I can think of is this when I hear it

You and me both.

"Mysterious as the dark side of the mooooooooooooooon."

 

[Uncreation]

Personally i don't care for that expression much. I'm a very atipical guy, and i don't feel comfortable acting "manly", so i don't like being told to be a man. I would prefer to be myself, rather than be a man.

 

[Doth]

Crying isn't just a show of emotion; it is essentially a sign of enormous weakness (when crying out of despair, fear, or depression, that is.) and weakness isn't a very desirable attribute now is it?
...Especially not in men.
So man the fuck up.

Complaining about being told to be a proper man is beyond description in scale of pathetic.

 

[No_Remainders]

Retards who tell depressed people to "Be a man" are just douchebags being high and mighty. There's no other way to describe it. The last thing a guy who is depressed wants to hear is "be a man" because it just puts more pressure on them.

Anyone who disagrees with me is a ****.

 

[Serenegoose]

All I can think of is this when I hear it

You and me both.

"Mysterious as the dark side of the mooooooooooooooon."

Me three!

 

[Jonny1188]

To be a man you must have honor, honor and a penis!

OT: Outdated slogan when we assumed only women had emotions. I think nowadays you would tastefully encourage them to get a move on with life, simply for the fact that its too short to be bummed all the time.

 

[FallenProject]

It's a horrible statement. At first glance it's just downright annoying, and secondly it assumes that you CAN snap out of whatever highly emotional phase you're going through. It's just a display of utter ignorance, as people who suffer from depression or bipolar by definition CANNOT snap out of it.

Even if you don't suffer from the above, you should work through your emotions and explore them instead of encouraging stoicism and bottling them up. It will only lead to worse situations when you take your frustration out on the innocent.

 

[Naheal]

I don't cry anymore. I devote that energy to more useful endeavors.

 

[Murray Whitwell]

Having a pair is for the weak and particularly vulnerable.

 

[Sark]

Be a man is such a great motivation phrase. Trying to get the courage up to ask out a girl? Be a man, go do it. Just got hurt by something rather painful? Be a man, don't show your weakness.

It's not about promoting gender roles and sterotypes. It's about believing in the you that believes in yourself.

 

[Nickolai77]

Men should cry about manly things like losing an entire platoon in combat or crashing a priceless Bugatti Veyron.

In all seriousness, "be a man" in most contexts means to exhibit traditional masculine virtues of strength, honour and courage. Not very useful to someone who is depressed though i must say, and of course the meaning of this phrase could imply that women lack said masculine virtues.

Then again, not many people today do actually believe women are lacking in strength, honour and courage, but would say the phrase without meaning it's implication. So, in most contexts, i don't object to the phrase "be a man"

 

[Naheal]

I don't cry anymore. I devote that energy to more useful endeavors.

We shall see. I will melt your heart yet!

Perhaps. We shall see. You done cleaning up there, by the way?

 

[Anarchemitis]

Like many things in life, such a term to be taken seriously or scherzo is entirely contextual.

 

[DuctTapeJedi]

I don't agree with it first of all on feminist grounds. "Be a man" is one of the most sexist statements I hear in common use. Not only does it imply that being a non-man, ie. female, is something that makes one emotional and unstable, it also shoehorns all men everywhere into an emotional iron maiden. The idea that "a man" is stoic and relatively emotionless causes all kinds of untold damage due to repressed issues that need to be dealt with. Let me take rural Australia for example. There's been a drought here for the past decade or so. Out in rural areas that takes its toll. Men who ascribe to the Stoic and Manly ideal find it difficult to seek help for the problems, such as depression, that arise out of having a failing farm when it's been in the family for generations. Stereotype, but you get the idea. The suicide rate in those areas and in this situation shoots right up.

The other reason it irks me is because it demonstrates a fundamental misunderstanding about mental illness. I differentiate here between medical depression and "I'm down, need someone to talk to." While the latter is valid as a request, the former runs far deeper. For someone with depression it is impossible to "be a man" and cheer up because of chemical imbalances and other physiological factors upon which no amount of stoicism can have an effect. Stephen Fry related an anecdote during an interview about a fellow bi-polar man in the depressive swing of his illness. This guy had walked in front of a truck and wound up spending six months having the bones in his legs re-broken and re-set repeatedly in an effort to enable him to walk again. The guy said that while yes, the pain of having his legs mended was truly terrible, "it was nothing compared to the pain that made me step onto the highway."

Manic depressives do have the manic part of that cycle to reassure them. It will get better for them because that's a part of their illness. People with depression don't, and it's not fair to burden them with masculinity crap atop everything else. It won't make them better, it could well make them worse. The most likely result is that they just stop talking about their troubles.

You saved me the trouble of typing my response. I couldn't have said it better.