Breastfeeding in Public

[Trippy Turtle]

Really depends. At a shopping centre or something, sure fine. Its more along the lines of a guy walking around topless or having a boisterous argument with a friend. Nothing wrong with it, but time and place people.
In a restaurant no. I won't go over and complain about it but I mean come on. Its a formal setting, nobody needs to see you topless. Similar to swearing, its just common decency to not do it in front of children and other places just in case some people people don't approve. Sure they will get over it, but you could just be polite and not do it. It's not as if its a chore to go to a bathroom or something.

 

[Mithcha]

Meh, I can eat where ever, so can the baby. And given that the mother is a walking bottle, don't see why she should get a new one for public use in the name of 'decency'. Fuck that. Just feed the fucker. Really don't care.

 

[The Ditz]

Although I am a little uncomfortable around breastfeeding, it still is probably the best option for the mother and child, so who am I to get in the way of that.

I mean , its not like bottles are always an option as you need the formula to be warm.

and to the people who compare breastfeeding to the body's removal of waste, lets call it what it is: eating... so, if you think that babies shouldn't eat in public and should go into the bathroom in order to do so, maybe you should stop ordering and eating food in public and instead go into the restroom and eat there, if eating in public seems so objectionable to you.

 

[Petromir]

In general as long as its being sensibly done go with it.

In a really fancy restaurant etc where I'm expected to be wearing a full lengths sleave, collar and tie (possibly even a jacket) a greater level of modesty is appropriate than at a chain restaraunt (thankfully a fair number of the former I still know of are by design more private locations). A fair number of other places I'd discount on hygine or safety grounds for the good of the baby in question.

 

[happyninja42]

Does it make you feel uncomfortable when you see a woman breastfeeding her child in a public area? If so, does it always make you uncomfortable or is it okay provided that her breasts are completely covered?

No it doesn't make me uncomfortable. I might have a momentary shock reaction upon first walking into a room and seeing a woman with a breast out, but after my brain processes what's going on it's business as usual in that regard. She's got a child, the child needs to eat, end of story. I have no issue if they want to use a blanket or towel to cover up while they do so, and in fact, every time I've ever seen a woman in public nursing, this has been the case. I've personally never seen a woman just flip out the boob and start nursing, with everyone able to see her full breast. But if I did see it, aside from the initial reaction, and the one stated below, I don't really care.

Alternatively, do you just see it as something natural and non-sexual, something women should be free to do whenever and wherever they please?

I do think it's natural, and I think it's non-sexual for the child and mother. However my reactions to it on some occasions have been sexual. Sorry but if I see a woman I find sexually attractive partially undressed, my brain instantly thinks "oh my yes, I would like to see more of that woman without clothes on, preferably pressed up against me!" But that's not exclusive to nursing women, and in fact has nothing to do with them nursing. Any attractive woman I see will trigger that mental reaction to some degree or other. Welcome to Everyday of the Week in a guy's head.

Yes they should be free to do it whenever and wherever they please. Yes it gives me sexual thought sometimes, but my sexual fantasies are not their problem or concern And I'm not going to prohibit them caring for their child because they're triggering fantasies in my head.

Do you think that instead of possibly making people uncomfortable, women should have to go into private areas, such as bathrooms, to breastfeed?

Absolutely not. Who wants to stand in some nasty public bathroom for several minutes, while your kid nurses, and possibly someone else is dropping a torpedo into the bowl stinking up the place? They're not doing anything nasty, and shouldn't be forced to sit in a bathroom while they do it like some kind of second class citizen. I actually saw a "Nursing Mothers Room" sign on a women's bathroom just yesterday. It was the first time I'd seen that, and I found it odd, because I thought they had a legal right to nurse wherever in the United States? I might be wrong about that, but I could've sworn I saw a news article about a woman fighting a business telling her to stop nursing, and she quoted she has the legal right to do so in public.

Do you think that women who do so are exhibitionists? Should they just always have bottles prepared to feed their child when out and about?

.....wow really? *snerks* I'm highly amused by this radio talk show that you listened to, if this was the type of statement they made. No I don't think they're exhibitionists, I think they've got a hungry kid, and a boob full of milk by which to feed him.

 

[Lil devils x_v1legacy]

I really do not understand the hang up people have with the human body or why anyone thinks it is okay to impose their weird hangups on to other people. A woman should be able to bare her breasts in public the same as anyone else does their arms, leg or face. There is nothing shameful about a breast, and even worse expecting them to hide it to feed their child is beyond absurd. I do hope one day society moves beyond this weird trend of " body shaming" it seems to be in right now so people can focus on more important issues.

 

[someonehairy-ish]

I'd much rather people breastfed than have to listen to little people-spawns screeching away in public. And as a wise man once said, one should never vote against boobs, for that can only be a losing strategy.

 

[the December King]

Sure didn't take long for people to start throwing the 'misogyny' card around. Guess it's just easier to do that instead of, I dunno, trying to understand the opposition's viewpoint.

Who said this? The most people said is "get over it." Not a single person in this thread even once claimed misogyny in this whole topic.

I hate to be that guy, but thundra on page 2 did say it. As someone who has mixed feelings on this topic, when I don't agree with someone's polarized viewpoint, those kind of words do jump out.

 

[Scars Unseen]

Sure didn't take long for people to start throwing the 'misogyny' card around. Guess it's just easier to do that instead of, I dunno, trying to understand the opposition's viewpoint.

Who said this? The most people said is "get over it." Not a single person in this thread even once claimed misogyny in this whole topic.

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/jump/18.862544.21486901

As for my opinion, I'd rather have someone exposing their breast than letting their hungry baby cry. It's not about the mother or the observers. When your baby is tired, let him sleep. When he's filled his diaper, change it. And when your baby is hungry, feed him. Simple as that.

And as usual, XKCD has something to say on the topic(second row down).

Spoiler

 

[TravelerSF]

Huh... So this is a problem to some people? Probably a cultural thing then. I haven't really been many situations where someone has started breastfeeding, but I recall one somewhat distant acquaintance of mine just taking her breast out and starting feeding her baby in a scout meeting with some more and less familiar people. I really had not much experience with how to react, but since she didn't seem to see anything odd with that, I decided neither should I. And I still hold that position.

I mean if people are fine with seeing models showing off their tits and ass in advertisements, they should be able to take a mother using her breast to FEED HER BABY. If you find THAT too much to take, well then you've seriously lost touch with what it means to be a human being.

 

[Mr. Eff_v1legacy]

Babies need to eat. Boobs have the food. Let them eat.

I fail to see how anyone could see breasts as sexual when there's a wrinkly little person suckling on them. People who get upset about this type of thing need a new cause, or a hobby of some kind.

In fact, I don't think people should get uptight about boobs even when there aren't babies involved. Let people be comfortable in their own skins, and be let others get uptight over it if they want.

 

[giles]

Well, women breastfeeding their babies in public is like men going shirtless in the summer. It's not illegal and the people who do it know they're gonna annoy some people. And they don't give a fuck. So complaining is useless.

That said, I'm not sure I wanna see that kind of stuff in a restaurant. Restaurants are for pretending to be super sophisticated so it doesn't quite fit. On a related note, I don't want men to be shirtless there either.

 

[wildstars]

beside, except for the 3 seconds you uncover the breast, and put the baby on it, and the other 23 seconds where you remove the baby and cover the breast again.

Who timed this? Are the competitions, like quick draw competitions?

On a more serious note...
For me, its the not-intimate-nature of something that would be intimate if it wasn't a baby. That bugs me. I think that's it, but I'm not sure. I'm certainly not prudish, I have no problems with topless women in public or otherwise.

I think the urination comparison is an attempt to point out that 'natural & non-sexual' is not a valid arguing point. I would've gone with coughing as a comparison. Also, no matter what it is... its sexual to somebody.

Long and short of it is: if its legal (and even if it isn't) I just deal with it. But you've gotta put up with my harmless but loud persistent cough in exchange.

 

[Weaver]

I don't care as long as the person feeding doesn't get mad at me if I see their boobs.

It's legal for woman to be topless here anyways.

 

[Fappy]

But mostly, I think we need to grow up as a culture.

So much this.

Social conditioning have taught us that our bodies and their functions are inherently shameful and icky. This is obviously a stupid notion and we should never feel ashamed or embarrassed about our biology. We're all humans, after all. Raising children is literally the point of our continued existence as a species, so it's pretty silly to say women can't feed their children in public.

Some people just need to get over themselves.

 

[otakon17]

Okay, so this seems like an odd one but I was listening to a discussion about breastfeeding in public on the radio and I was quite surprised by the attitudes of some people towards it.

By public, I mean in restaurants, in shopping centres and what have you.

A few questions to start discussion, inspired by some of the answers people gave on the radio regarding the topic:

Does it make you feel uncomfortable when you see a woman breastfeeding her child in a public area? If so, does it always make you uncomfortable or is it okay provided that her breasts are completely covered?

Alternatively, do you just see it as something natural and non-sexual, something women should be free to do whenever and wherever they please?

Do you think that instead of possibly making people uncomfortable, women should have to go into private areas, such as bathrooms, to breastfeed?

Do you think that women who do so are exhibitionists? Should they just always have bottles prepared to feed their child when out and about?

You don't have to stick to these questions, I'm just interested in people's opinions on the subject in general.

1. No.
2. Yes.
3. No.

Breasts need to stop being seen as genitals dammit. They're not, they're secondary sexual characteristics with a very specific purpose of feeding babies. The fact that people find them hot(and I myself consider myself a boobguy) is irrelevant to stuff like this. People need to unpucker their butts about this.

 

[SonOfVoorhees]

I think they need to be a bit more considerate to people around them aka not when in a restaurant. Its ok in public as people can ignore you and walk past.

 

[K12]

I don't get why people are uncomfortable (and sometimes weirdly hostile) about this, I for one find it really cute. People can't help feeling uncomfortable about things I suppose but my sympathies are always going to tend towards the hungry baby and his/her mum than it will with passers-by who are offended by tits.

As long as she isn't breastfeeding her teenage children then I think it's more of an imposition to complain to the mother than it is for her to be breastfeeding.

 

[Brennan]

And yes, breast feeding is natural and nonsexual. You know what else is natural and nonsexual (to me)? Urinating, but I don't want to see a woman squat down on a lawn and take a piss either.

As many people bring up during the breastfeeding argument, pissing is natural so why don't we do that in public. The reason why you cant pee in public is because men can pee. Only women can breast feed, which lets them fallaciously link it to women's rights/women's choice. If men produced milk and fed babies the same way women do, public breastfeeding could be labeled inappropriate and regulated to private places like bathrooms.

Breastfeeding a baby is one of the most natural things you can do.

So is also a lot of other things like urinating or having sex.

All of these have to do with bodily functions and they would all gross me out seeing others do in public.

Taking a shit is also natural but I don't drop one in the middle of the street or on a train do I?

I think the urination comparison is an attempt to point out that 'natural & non-sexual' is not a valid arguing point. I would've gone with coughing as a comparison. Also, no matter what it is... its sexual to somebody.

Long and short of it is: if its legal (and even if it isn't) I just deal with it. But you've gotta put up with my harmless but loud persistent cough in exchange.

Hokay, sorry for the miltiquote, but this has to be pointed out. The reasons why going to the bathroom in public and breastfeeding in public are stigmatized as "gross" are apples and oranges to each other in ways that should be obvious. Trying to make an "if A then B" comparison between the two makes it look like you're deliberately avoiding thinking your position through.

Crapping and/or pissing in public is stigmatized as gross because it's massively unsanitary. You're depositing a big, nasty, health risky mess in a place where other people have to deal with it and continue to deal with it after you're gone. There is a very good reason why latrines placed separate from common areas is a universal feature of all but the most backward of societies, both modern and historical. In a modern society there's also the implication that the person doing it probably isn't wiping, and definitely isn't washing, and therefore is in general someone you don't want to physically interact with even when they aren't crapping/pissing.

And before you say "bodily fluids" about the latter point: piss and shit are produced by the body because they are wastes and toxins your body needs to get rid of. Not wanting to come in contact with them, either others' or your own, makes sense because stuff the body needs to get rid of is obviously stuff you don't want to reintroduce to the body. Milk is produced by the body for literally the exact opposite purpose: to nourish and promote the health of another human.

From a sanitation perspective, you are literally better off shaking hands with someone who just finished breastfeeding an infant than someone who just finished licking BBQ sauce off their fingers. Which brings us back to the "it's eating" point others have said: rationally all the things that make breastfeeding "gross" would apply equally or more to eating. If you object to public breastfeeding on sanitation grounds, then to not object to public eating in general for the same reasons would be intellectually dishonest.

Breastfeeding is stigmatized as "gross" because our specific family of cultures has convinced itself that breasts are intrinsically sexual regardless of context, and that that's a bad thing regardless of context. Thus boobs = inappropriate, and contexts which conflict with sexuality are perceived as jarringly paraphilic rather than simply nonsexual. Also because we've somehow detached human milk from the concept of "food" and falsely reclassified it in the same context as things like blood or piss or semen. This despite us happily consuming non-human dairy as food, and the fact that dairy in general is one of the only foods in nature which actually exists to be a food, as opposed to being another organism trying to exist in it's own right before being suborned as food by another organism.

TL/DR: being grossed out by people pissing/crapping in public has a solid practical basis independent of cultural mores/views. Being grossed out by breastfeeding in public is just a cultural artifact, and ultimately an internally inconsistent one.

 

[karloss01]

How often do women do so without covering themselves? Maybe its just how people handle it where I live but in public I normally just see this.

But maybe ladies just whip in other cities? Either way it wouldn't bother me. A baby has to eat. Unless you are staring you won't see nipple, and the babies head covers a fair bit from a casual glance. I think some people are more comfortable with seeing a woman it a itty bitty bikini top than seeing her feed her child.

My teacher just whipped her tits out when she decided to breast feed, didn't even try to obscure the process just full on boob in the classroom. yet I was the only one who thought that was weird, rest of the class were female (this was in high school in citizenship).

but yes, I have a problem because I'm not the one feeding from them no I don't have a problem with it.