Brovengers, brossemble!

[Hawk of Battle]

Foolish mortals. You fight for pointless ideals amongst yourselves, creating chaos and mindless, mis-directed destruction all around you, never knowing your true place and purpose in the universe. You live your lives in a haze, trapped into repeating your many mistakes, never elevating yourselves above your base instincts. You are mewling infants. Insects to be crushed beneath the heel of your betters, who look down upon your existence with disgust.

But no longer! Brovengers, Injustice League, it matters not what you label yourselves, all will be swept aside and annihilated in the coming storm. The more you fight now the weaker you shall all be and the easier the inevitable conquest. The extermination shall be swift and merciless. The earth will be purified in fire and the cancer known as mankind shall be destroyed.

So continue with your petty wars. Fight each other unto death, I encourage it, for nothing can stop the onslaught to come. This war is just the first stage of your inevitable downfall.

Everything is going according to plan...

 

[Carbonyl]

I've read through all 7 pages and I still have no idea whats going on. Its like I've stumbled into a section for Ice users.

Care to enlighten me anyone?

It seems someone has declared war on Daystar Clarion and his cult following.
So, for fun, he is readying his mindless masses, rallying them around himself in an attempt to survive.
And the enemy of his cult, the Injustice League, is using this thread to recruit/convert members.
Like me.
You should join the Injustice League as well.
You are a Britannian, after all.

I have no idea what the fuck is going on. All I know is that I'm gonna join the other side. Your fame has gotten to your fucking head Daystar and now you think you can derail threads because "I'm popular lol".

Just pisses me off, knowing that you can break the rules if you're popular.

On the shores of insanity we will face you, our dastardly foes! A battle for the ages!

I do not battle for Daystar, lovely gentleman though he be. I fight for whimsy! I fight for rambling answers to mundane and uninspired questions that relate in only the most tangental and absurd manner. I fight for the ridiculous responses on otherwise unremarkable and banal threads that will suddenly stir the imagination and ignite a sweeping rainbow flame of surrealistic wonder shared between people completely disconnected from each other. Colliding in the umbrella-deserts of a boring and shallow thread, they discover a gem of random, simple, outrageous nonsense. Volleying this delightful parcel of glee back and forth from post to post, swerving from the tracks onto untrodden ground, they create a fundamental connection with their formless companions in the triumph of simple silly joys.
It is an adventure in pleasantness and safe insanity.
We can connect in the untarnished and unconditional enjoyment of our strange words, and escape the concrete.

I fight, for fun.
I wield the training montage and my mind is a crazy quilt.
You cannot win.

You have an admirable flair with the english language.

I salute thee!

When I go two days without any sleep, I get much better with words.
Well until the point at which I start speaking in nothing but cryptic metaphors and synesthetic descriptions. At that point I'm about as understandable as the Oracle at Delphi.

How much do I have pay you to never sleep again?

You don't have to pay me anything, I'm already paying my college enough for the privilege of staying up for four days straight to work on lab reports and term papers. On the fifth day I saw a fish swim out of the physics professor's face during lecture, and then I rested. .... After I went to Advanced Organic Synth and ran an NMR.
I'm just hardcore like that.
My lab partner told me I wouldn't stop talking about how he didn't have to worry because there weren't any jellyfish.
I don't remember whether I was talking about his jellyfish or mine, but there were zero lab accidents that day so either way I was right!

..... I think I'm beginning to reach that point.

.
Well Shit.

You should probably get some rest then

Don't worry, we can hold the fort till you get back.

Problematically, I still have about 7 pages more of my thesis that needs to be done by... oh 6 hours ago now. I have to keep chugging away. This being the shining beacon of insanity that is dragging me from the depths of despair, I think I shall remain.
Alas
Alack
Woe is me.
*dramatic swoon*

Do brovengers swoon? Or do they just pass out from the sheer force of their own awesomeness?

The latter.

Most definitely the latter.

I do not envy the proof reader of your work

Oi! Look at all of the high-quality spelling, punctuation, and sentence structure that I have employed consistently through the past hour!
Two days is child's play. Seriously, it is. My body is so used to consistent sleep deprivation that I now go straight into REM as an automatic self-preservation response. But from what I hear from alums, grad school is WAY less intense than Reed is. So just one more semester and I get to sleep more than three nights a week.

As Courage Wolf says:
I don't stop when I'm tired
I stop when it's done.

 

[lordlillen]

You have the Sunbros at your side.

 

[The Funslinger]

I will bring the booze

You are a saint amongst Bros, bro.

To be fair, I think we all need to bring booze. According to Article 90 of the Bro-code, a bro shows up at another bro's party with at least one more unit of alcohol than he plans to drink.

In any case, I'll cancel all my appointments and alert the General of the South Korean militia I need my death ray back.

 

[JoJo]

Hello, my name is Sergeant Bubbles, I am definitely here to support the Brovengers and am in no way affiliated with the Injustice League. Keep talking about your secret plans, don't mind me...

Spoiler

 

[Carbonyl]

I will bring the booze

You are a saint amongst Bros, bro.

To be fair, I think we all need to bring booze. According to Article 90 of the Bro-code, a bro shows up at another bro's party with at least one more unit of alcohol than he plans to drink.

In any case, I'll cancel all my appointments and alert the General of the South Korean militia I need my death ray back.

If all I plan to drink is Juicy-Juice, can I just bring a package of those?
Or some Caprisun?

Seriously, why waste flammable fluids by drinking them?
Use them to make every meal en' flambe!

 

[Carbonyl]

Hello, my name is Sergeant Bubbles, I am definitely here to support the Brovengers and am in no way affiliated with the Injustice League. Keep talking about your secret plans, don't mind me...

Spoiler

An owl can always find her rodent prey, and you, sir, reek of mole!
HAVE AT THEE, BRIGAND!

 

[JoJo]

Hello, my name is Sergeant Bubbles, I am definitely here to support the Brovengers and am in no way affiliated with the Injustice League. Keep talking about your secret plans, don't mind me...

Spoiler

An owl can always find her rodent prey, and you, sir, reek of mole!
HAVE AT THEE, BRIGAND!

Curses, I have been detected, there is no option but to fight my way out!

*Lunges for Carbonyl with drill spinning*

 

[JoesshittyOs]

Oh shit. Do we have a Mascot?

Because if not, I think that means they're winning.

Wait... What side am I on? Am I fucking double agent? HOLY SHIT!

 

[Carbonyl]

Hello, my name is Sergeant Bubbles, I am definitely here to support the Brovengers and am in no way affiliated with the Injustice League. Keep talking about your secret plans, don't mind me...

Spoiler

An owl can always find her rodent prey, and you, sir, reek of mole!
HAVE AT THEE, BRIGAND!

Curses, I have been detected, there is no option but to fight my way out!

*Lunges for Carbonyl with drill spinning*

I step to the side and wrap you in the crazy quilt of MY MIND.

"It's time for a nap, JoJo, a permanent one!"

*In your confusion, you ram us both into a wall. I jump free but you were knocked over and have become stuck on your back like a turtle.*

"I see we'll have to get some potting soil to give your pansy a$$ a proper dirt-nap"

 

[JoJo]

Hello, my name is Sergeant Bubbles, I am definitely here to support the Brovengers and am in no way affiliated with the Injustice League. Keep talking about your secret plans, don't mind me...

Spoiler

An owl can always find her rodent prey, and you, sir, reek of mole!
HAVE AT THEE, BRIGAND!

Curses, I have been detected, there is no option but to fight my way out!

*Lunges for Carbonyl with drill spinning*

I step to the side and wrap you in the crazy quilt of MY MIND.

"It's time for a nap, JoJo, a permanent one!"

*In your confusion, you ram us both into a wall. I jump free but you were knocked over and have become stuck on your back like a turtle.*

"I see we'll have to get some potting soil to give your pansy a$$ a proper dirt-nap"

"What cruel fate is this?" I moan as I am stuck on my back. Luckily my little sis jumps off my head and run's underneath Carbonyl waving her ADAM collector.

"Let my Daddy back up or I'll stab yer!" she cries menacingly.

 

[Saltyk]

I must admit that while the Injustice League sounds like a organization of villainous bastards that must be stopped at all costs, there is a problem. Namely, my illogical, irrational hatred for all things "bro". I find myself thinking that both groups must be destroyed, at all costs. Yes, no cost is too high. Even if I must destroy this world to do so, that is worth the benefit. Let it all burn!

 

[Kaptajn Emil Alfred Conan Swagga Benzon]

...Oh dear god.
What do you need the brovengers to do, my leader?! D:< we Can not let this go unpunished!

We need more Bros!

Everyone who enters this thread is now officially a Brovenger!

Even the womenfolk can be bros.

Rule 22: There is no law that prohibits a woman from being a bro.

Does this mean that I am a Brovenger??

Someone tell me what this madness is all about

 

[theparsonski]

Can I join your band of Bros.?

I have cake.

You guys like cake, right?

 

[PsychicTaco115]

The recruitment drive is going swimmingly!

Each day, our ranks go stronger,eager for the battle ahead

Soon, the One Ring will be ours Daystar!

Wait, wrong series! Just prepare, Clarion!

 

[CrazyGirl17]

...Okay, I'm interested, where do I sign up? (With the Brovengers, mind you)

 

[TheLastSamurai14]

I'm with you, bros. Time for us to fight back against the Injustice League and their anti-bro stigma.

 

[Renegade-pizza]

I will lend my rage and strength to this battle! For when the Brovengers stand together, no force can halt our victory!!!

 

[Hazy992]

Can I join your band of Bros.?

I have cake.

You guys like cake, right?

Ooh cake! Welcome aboard Bro!

 

[Dectomax]

I've just finished reading all 9 pages of this and I'm not sure what the fuck is going on, but it is AWESOME.