Can we talk about the "friend zone" and "nice guys" for a moment?

[ShindoL Shill]

Completely Valid Points

Personally I think it's more "I'm really nice, and she doesn't want to go out with me, but she keeps complaining about all her boyfriends being dicks. What's up with that?"
I don't like it when people complain about being friend-zoned though. Like someone? Ask them out. Don't be their friend until you can, then abandon them when they say no which they probably did so they wouldn't lose a friend (and probably because she isn't attracted to you, but the two might be related).

 

[Popadoo]

I agree on some level. I have been told that by a girl that she wants to stay friends, but I wouldn't just stop being friends with them. The way I see it, a relationship is just a higher level of friendship, and if they don't want to go to that next level that doesn't make the rest of your friendship pointless.
But I think the reason guys get annoyed that, like you said, they want someone LIKE you, but NOT you. That's just annoying as hell, especially when they talk about how nice you are and ask why boys can't be like you and then go out with the Kyle for the fifth time... god damn Kyle, I want to punch that dick in the face over and ov...
*Ehem*
My point being their rage is justified by, not all girls, but that ones that go out with dicks and then complain about how boys should be more like you when YOU'RE STANDING RIGHT THERE, SINGLE AND LONELY.
RRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGE.
Edit:

The friend zone does not exist usually guys that get put in the friendzone are either losers or very unattractive no offense.

BTW i notice that nice guys seem to think they are entitled to women alot of you so called nice guys really creep me out

you act as if women belong to you and seem to be mad at the world because you rejected and noboyd wants to sleep with you.

Being nice does not make you an interesting person, a good person, does not mean you are attractive and I've notice unlike men , us ladies usually do not tell men we find unttractive that they are unattractive.

I wish more women were like me I do not hang around or associate with males that call themselves nice guys which is ually code for pushover , cornball,creep,or just very unattractive socially awkard male

trhe reason nice guys get the friend zone is not because of them being nice its because they are usually ugly as hell.

You are what is wrong with relationships.
Either that, or you're a troll. I think troll. No one with such bad grammar and spelling should be allowed to judge people, unless you're doing it on purpose and are therefore a troll.

 

[Onjenae]

"I wish I could find a guy like you" it means she likes your qualities, but isn't attracted to you.

That line right there I have issues with. That is literally like saying "I like everything about you except your face." And that most certainly is a ***** thing.

Anyway, it's never been about being felt owed anything (well some people think that way, but you have idiots with everything) it's about how a woman can complain about never finding a guy that supports her, or "treats her right" ect, ect, when the guy who has been friend-zoned has done nothing but that. You're putting the blame entirely on the guy who, most of the time, just does nothing except be a nice guy to the woman and develops romantic feelings. Guy expresses such to girl, guy gets spurned, and generally it's "whatever" at that point and things return to normal. Sure some guys keep their romantic feelings, but they're still friends and generally don't try anything else and eventually move on. I haven't seen many cases of the guy being nice just in order to date said woman, as those aren't the "nice guys" they claim to be. Most people don't ***** about being stuck there and think the girl is a ***** for it, most just ***** when a girl complains about never finding a decent guy.

By the way, a lot of the time the woman also gives the guy the idea to ask her out, because I've seen plenty of times with my friends the woman saying things like "You're such a great guy," or "You're single? Anybody would be lucky to date you though!" (yes, actual quotes) so she really isn't being blameless here. Also a lot of people have a rejection recovery period, where wondering "why doesn't she like me?" or something similar, but that's just rejection in general.

So TL;DR version is that the guy generally doesn't ***** and call the woman a ***** for the friend-zone, what you hear more often is wondering why a woman will complain about never finding a decent guy when they apparently have one sitting in the friend zone.

the thing is just because you are supposedly a nice guy does not mean you are the right guy for me honsetly i dont see why men find this so hard to understand


like i said again most guys who get put in the friendzone are not attractive jsut plain in simple

they aren't i never see attractive really handsome dudes get friendzone its always the socially awkard, dont know how to approach a lady type of guys and i need me a man not a boy who thinks if i get drunk he's going to get laid or a boy who pretends to be my firned intill he wears me down and gets me into bed with like most of these "nice guys" do

in my opinion most nice guys are losers

 

[VeryOddGamer]

The friend zone does not exist usually guys that get put in the friendzone are either losers or very unattractive no offense.

BTW i notice that nice guys seem to think they are entitled to women alot of you so called nice guys really creep me out

you act as if women belong to you and seem to be mad at the world because you rejected and noboyd wants to sleep with you.

Being nice does not make you an interesting person, a good person, does not mean you are attractive and I've notice unlike men , us ladies usually do not tell men we find unttractive that they are unattractive.

I wish more women were like me I do not hang around or associate with males that call themselves nice guys which is ually code for pushover , cornball,creep,or just very unattractive socially awkard male

trhe reason nice guys get the friend zone is not because of them being nice its because they are usually ugly as hell.

Wow, your post is just so extremely shallow, arrogant, hateful, and judgmental. I am really glad for those men you deem "ugly as hell" that you don't want to associate with them, and if you ever see me I hope you think I'm ugly as hell too so you'll stay the fuck away from me.

lmaooo you must be one of the lsoers who stay getting friendzone by the ladies lmaoooo keep up with the good luck young man

Yeah, TheVioletBandit is right.

 

[Rawne1980]

why must woman constantly pander to men's weak egos ? honestly if im not attracted to you what else do you want a woman to say your ugly ???

i wish more women would be honest with the guys they reject i have friends who reject ugly guys and tell oh your a nice guy blah blah blahhhhh

then these guys going on thinking there getting rejected because there nice when in reality the girl is not attracted to them


just like men have standartds women do to and most of these nice guys usually dont fall into women standards looks wise yet they expect to get the sexy, big breasted blue eye blonde hair supermodel type chick when he's not even on her level

i never see these so called nice guys chasing after females who have the same type of personalities as them they always go after the girl every other guys once and expects her to like him

Yet when I pass a lass in a nightclub queue and say "fuck me you're fugly" I'M the bad one?

By your standards i'm saving that lass the heartache of chasing after men far out of her "league".

(Disclaimer - if it makes anyone feel better I really did feel bad about saying that to the lass but I was incredibly drunk and she really was fugly .... plus I was a major arse hole in my younger years).

And not all men have standards. That's why we have beer. Come on lads, I know there are some of you out there that, like me, have gone out on the beer and gone home with Natalie Portman then woke up with Vanessa Feltz. Thats a "chew your arm off to escape" moment (and once led to me fleeing a house nekkid with my wallet covering my man tackle to get home, was far too scared she'd wake up and eat me if I tried to get dressed ..... although I did leave behind my favourite shirt).

Not all blokes go for the "friend" thing. Some of us are far too confident for our own good.

Not all lads need you to pander to their ego. Some of them need to be knocked back once or twice to kick them down a peg or two.

However there are some that are genuinely nice guys. They just lack confidence.

It's not "pandering to their ego" it's being decent and not being a complete fuckwit about it.

Telling the difference between a genuine nice guy and a muppet that thinks he's owed a relationship are 2 different things though.

I do wish i'd been nicer to some of the women i've met in my life but my brain rarely came into it. It really is possible to think with your penis and mine controlled me for many years (up until I met my wife and she kindly told me that if I ever cheated on her she'd cut it off and mount it).

 

[Meatspinner]

I'm getting horrible flashbacks from my 9gag days. Plz don't tell me that this meme is still alive.

Nothing like listening to half the community moping about their girl problems.

 

[Xangba]

The friend zone does not exist usually guys that get put in the friendzone are either losers or very unattractive no offense.

BTW i notice that nice guys seem to think they are entitled to women alot of you so called nice guys really creep me out

you act as if women belong to you and seem to be mad at the world because you rejected and noboyd wants to sleep with you.

Being nice does not make you an interesting person, a good person, does not mean you are attractive and I've notice unlike men , us ladies usually do not tell men we find unttractive that they are unattractive.

I wish more women were like me I do not hang around or associate with males that call themselves nice guys which is ually code for pushover , cornball,creep,or just very unattractive socially awkard male

trhe reason nice guys get the friend zone is not because of them being nice its because they are usually ugly as hell.

Yikes harsh! So nice=ugly? Act as if women belong to them? Losers? You don't have nice guys that get left in the "friend zone," you have creepers. Just saying.

Anyway seriously, half my friends have gotten into the friend zone situation, and no-homo they aren't bad looking, pushovers, creeps, or socially awkward (though I will admit me and my friends can be goofy, as seen by my tower of hats). And to ensure you know I'm not biased due to them being my friends some weren't even my friends at the time it happened, and I've seen it happen with people I don't even know too well.

Also what do you mean "unlike men us ladies usually do not tell men we find unattractive that they are unattractive?" Are you implying men are just assholes who say "Yeah sorry but you're fugly?" Look it sounds like you've just had a poor experience all-round, and need to make sure to not let it make you into a shallow *****, because that's how you're coming across. Or a troll. Eh let's hope troll.

 

[mitchell271]

The thing about being friend-zoned is that it really hurts. You're just expected to put on a brave face and just bear it. I've been friend-zoned before and it sucks. Especially if that person starts a relationship soon after your (let's just go with this) confession. But don't walk away thinking he/she is a ***** or an dick. Keep being friends with them but back off a little for one reason: give yourself a chance to heal and move on.

Friend-zone sucks. I've been friend-zoned, I have put people in the friend-zone so I know what both sides are like.

Captcha: hear hear
Captcha agrees with me! How 'bout that?

However there are some that are genuinely nice guys. They just lack confidence..

Hi, yea, that's me. At least, I'm pretty sure I'm the nice guy.

 

[Xangba]

EDIT: God damn my internet seems to screwing up.

 

[tobyornottoby]

That line right there I have issues with. That is literally like saying "I like everything about you except your face." And that most certainly is a ***** thing.

Why? Looks matter, at least for a significant portion of people.
You can condone that. Other people will condone hanging out on a game forum. There are very few things that aren't seen as a negative by someone.

Anyway, it's never been about being felt owed anything (well some people think that way, but you have idiots with everything) it's about how a woman can complain about never finding a guy that supports her, or "treats her right" ect, ect, when the guy who has been friend-zoned has done nothing but that. You're putting the blame entirely on the guy who, most of the time, just does nothing except be a nice guy to the woman and develops romantic feelings.

Which is exactly the problem.
You want someone to hate you? Be mean to them.
You want someone to be friends with you? Be nice to them.
You want someone to love you? Be romantic to them.

You got exactly what you've asked for. You should've asked in a different way.

Also, if I say I'm looking for a purple car, and you have a broken purple car that doesn't work anymore in your backyard, that doesn't qualify. Or maybe you have one with 2 seats and I need one with 4 seats. A girl can say she's looking for a guy that threats her right. But that's not the only thing. She isn't just looking for a guy. She's looking for the kinda guy she likes, but one that also threats her right.

A girl doesn't dream of "marrying a decent guy". She wants a guy she loves who is a decent guy. If 'being a decent guy' is your most outstanding feature, you need to work on yourself.

So TL;DR version is that the guy generally doesn't ***** and call the woman a ***** for the friend-zone, what you hear more often is wondering why a woman will complain about never finding a decent guy when they apparently have one sitting in the friend zone.

You must be new here on the internet.
There are a LOT of "nice guy" rants floating around. Really, it isn't funny. It's just... sad.
You seem to be talking more about talks in real life? I'm sure you're right in that regard, as the guys who think this way might be way too shy to express it in person.

 

[Patrick Buck]

I disagree, but then again, I'm bias, considering the girl I asked out two weeks ago, reacted by saying "Oh my god, I didn't know you felt that way"...

And then hiding from me ever since, and not responding to my texts, reguardless what they're about.
Oh, but I do agree with your "Entitled to the relationship" point. If she says no, she says no, but still. At least SAY no rather than running away... -_- Rant over.

 

[Ympulse]

[snip]

If it weren't for the fact that most "friendzoned" guys are used as emotional punching bags for their respective "friends," this would really be less of an issue. But frankly, I have to put up with enough shit from my GF as it is, and we're romantically involved. Imagine the guy's frustration if he had to put up with the same shit, but wasn't romantically involved with the woman?

TL;DR: OP is an attention-whore. Have fun.

 

[Onjenae]

The friend zone does not exist usually guys that get put in the friendzone are either losers or very unattractive no offense.

BTW i notice that nice guys seem to think they are entitled to women alot of you so called nice guys really creep me out

you act as if women belong to you and seem to be mad at the world because you rejected and noboyd wants to sleep with you.

Being nice does not make you an interesting person, a good person, does not mean you are attractive and I've notice unlike men , us ladies usually do not tell men we find unttractive that they are unattractive.

I wish more women were like me I do not hang around or associate with males that call themselves nice guys which is ually code for pushover , cornball,creep,or just very unattractive socially awkard male

trhe reason nice guys get the friend zone is not because of them being nice its because they are usually ugly as hell.

Yikes harsh! So nice=ugly? Act as if women belong to them? Losers? You don't have nice guys that get left in the "friend zone," you have creepers. Just saying.

Anyway seriously, half my friends have gotten into the friend zone situation, and no-homo they aren't bad looking, pushovers, creeps, or socially awkward (though I will admit me and my friends can be goofy, as seen by my tower of hats). And to ensure you know I'm not biased due to them being my friends some weren't even my friends at the time it happened, and I've seen it happen with people I don't even know too well.

Also what do you mean "unlike men us ladies usually do not tell men we find unattractive that they are unattractive?" Are you implying men are just assholes who say "Yeah sorry but you're fugly?" Look it sounds like you've just had a poor experience all-round, and need to make sure to not let it make you into a shallow *****, because that's how you're coming across. Or a troll.

no what im saying is when men find a girl unattractive they usually let her know more or less

am i not a troll i giving my honest opinion as a woman im tired of hearing so called nice guys ***** and complain msot of you so called nice guys jsut want to get laid


you notice that when msot nice guys complain they are always complaining about how they treat the ladies so good yet we still wont sleep with them being nice to me does not guarantee i will ahve sex with you or find you attractive

which alot of nice guys do not seem to understand

 

[Xangba]

Edit:snip

Nah not new to the internet, I just ignore people that are painfully obviously about to go into a ***** rant. There's too many and I tend to avoid counting them for anything. Anyway I think we had a small misunderstanding with my "been nothing but a nice guy" part. Generally if someone actually likes some girl they're friends with they try and be more romantic. Now I see you're referring to the ones who become friends, act like friends, then out of nowhere say "Go out with me!" as opposed to become friends, get feelings, act romantic, which yeah, there's a reason that doesn't work. I'm also one of those who believes your girlfriend/boyfriend should also be your friend, because those are the healthiest relationships in my mind.

And I wasn't saying looks don't matter, they do and anyone who claims otherwise is lying their ass off, but I was saying I literally have issues with a woman saying that to a guy that likes them. I haven't had it said to me, but just hearing it said hurt, so I can only imagine being the one it was said to.

 

[Onjenae]

That line right there I have issues with. That is literally like saying "I like everything about you except your face." And that most certainly is a ***** thing.

Why? Looks matter, at least for a significant portion of people.
You can condone that. A lot of people will condone hanging out on a game forum. There are very few things that aren't seen as a negative by someone.

Anyway, it's never been about being felt owed anything (well some people think that way, but you have idiots with everything) it's about how a woman can complain about never finding a guy that supports her, or "treats her right" ect, ect, when the guy who has been friend-zoned has done nothing but that. You're putting the blame entirely on the guy who, most of the time, just does nothing except be a nice guy to the woman and develops romantic feelings.

Which is exactly the problem.
You want someone to hate you? Be mean to them.
You want someone to be friends with you? Be nice to them.
You want someone to love you? Be romantic to them.

You got exactly what you've asked for. You should've asked in a different way.

Also, if I say I'm looking for a purple car, and you have a broken purple car that doesn't work anymore in your backyard, that doesn't qualify. Or maybe you have one with 2 seats and I need one with 4 seats. A girl can say she's looking for a guy that threats her right. But that's not the only thing. She isn't just looking for a guy. She's looking for the kinda guy she likes, but one that also threats her right.

A girl doesn't dream of "marrying a decent guy". She wants a guy she loves who is a decent guy. If 'being a decent guy' is your most outstanding feature, you need to work on yourself.

So TL;DR version is that the guy generally doesn't ***** and call the woman a ***** for the friend-zone, what you hear more often is wondering why a woman will complain about never finding a decent guy when they apparently have one sitting in the friend zone.

You must be new here on the internet.
There are a LOT of "nice guy" rants floating around. Really, it isn't funny. It's just... sad.

omg finally somebody who gets what im sayng i agree with virtually everything u said


men are shallow all the time but god forbid a woman be shallow lmaoooo men kill me

when nice guys start chasing after ncie girls and stop trying to date the chick everybody wants to fuck then maybe i will have sympathy for them.

 

[tobyornottoby]

Yikes harsh! So nice=ugly?

A cow is an animal, an animal isn't a cow.

 

[Starik20X6]

I've been friend zoned before, due to the way my mind worked at the time. Thus, I've worked out more or less how to minimise friend zoning. Girls, feel free to correct any wild misconceptions I've grown:

As far as I can tell, it's not about "girls like douchebags", it's "girls like confidence". Problem is, the douchiest people tend to be the most confident ones, thus being perceived as more attractive. You can be a nice person and still be confident. It's about not being a wimp, about not taking crap from anybody without spewing crap yourself. Also, you need to have a life and be your own person before she comes along. Despite what rom coms might tell you, you shouldn't need anybody to 'complete' you.

 

[VeryOddGamer]

The friend zone does not exist usually guys that get put in the friendzone are either losers or very unattractive no offense.

BTW i notice that nice guys seem to think they are entitled to women alot of you so called nice guys really creep me out

you act as if women belong to you and seem to be mad at the world because you rejected and noboyd wants to sleep with you.

Being nice does not make you an interesting person, a good person, does not mean you are attractive and I've notice unlike men , us ladies usually do not tell men we find unttractive that they are unattractive.

I wish more women were like me I do not hang around or associate with males that call themselves nice guys which is ually code for pushover , cornball,creep,or just very unattractive socially awkard male

trhe reason nice guys get the friend zone is not because of them being nice its because they are usually ugly as hell.

Wow, your post is just so extremely shallow, arrogant, hateful, and judgmental. I am really glad for those men you deem "ugly as hell" that you don't want to associate with them, and if you ever see me I hope you think I'm ugly as hell too so you'll stay the fuck away from me.

lmaooo you must be one of the lsoers who stay getting friendzone by the ladies lmaoooo keep up with the good luck young man

Nice spelling you got there. Obvious troll is obvious.

aww nice guy got his feelings hurt dont get mad at me because you dont get laid

Well, TheVioletBandit's post summed up my opinion of you quite well. Also, from you not using proper grammar, I can also come up with the conclusion that you're either trolling, lazy, stupid or just not giving a damn.
So, just to remind you, you are

extremely shallow, arrogant, hateful, and judgmental.

 

[Hagi]

us ladies

I will probably get a warning for this, but eh.

Babe, you're not a lady. I know ladies. You're not one of them, trust me on that (or don't).

And please, by all means prove me right by replying I'm just saying this because I can't get laid or throwing any other kind of insult at me. It'll give me a good laugh.