Cheater cheater pumpkin eater.

[Darkrain11]

Playing arcade mode on SF2 HDR is a pain. Ex: Me: "Alright Zangief your going down(high kick to face)
Zangieg: OH WELL FUCK YOUR HIGH KICK (grabs and does 360 piledriver)
Me:....dick
Mind you this all happened in the frames of animation where 'gief was taking damage. And don't even get me started on Akuma on arcade mode "grumbles and breathes heavily in anger".

 

[Marv21]

Ninja Gaiden 2....nuff said!

 

[Flour]

In the original Mortal Kombat, the computer is able to skip parts of an animation, if you shoot a projectile while it's standing up it can duck. The computer can grab you a few frames after it stopped walking(takes you half a second standing still) from further than you can kick, and it reads controller input.

Every racing game with rubberband AI, most obvious in Mario Kart where the AI always has the best items and starts driving perfect when you're in the top 3.

There isn't enough room on the Escapist's host server to list all the games that cheat(and all the ways they do it), and in some way, cheating AI is required to keep the game a challenge. It's just when the cheating becomes obvious that it's bad.

I'm sure I could think of some better examples, but the most recent is Ninja Gaiden 2.

There's a huge flaming armadillo you have to fight (for reference I played on the hardest difficulty available) who was a ***** to kill in the first place. Once he dies, he all of a sudden explodes into a nuclear blast that instantly kills you unless you hold the block button down.

There is NO warning, no hints or anything. I beat it because on my 5th attempt I actually put my controller down and it pressed the left trigger (block) in.

There's a difference between cheap and cheating, and Ninja Gaiden doesn't cheat. It's just extremely cheap with lots of trial and error gameplay.(some bosses would even be possible without ever getting hit)

 

[Flying-Emu]

Playing arcade mode on SF2 HDR is a pain. Ex: Me: "Alright Zangief your going down(high kick to face)
Zangieg: OH WELL FUCK YOUR HIGH KICK (grabs and does 360 piledriver)
Me:....dick
Mind you this all happened in the frames of animation where 'gief was taking damage. And don't even get me started on Akuma on arcade mode "grumbles and breathes heavily in anger".

Ah, the glories of playing against Zangief. Gamebreaking little twat.

Your dialogue brought me many lulz. You have won an Emunet. It's like an internet, but populated with Emus instead of trolls.

 

[Biosophilogical]

The final boss in prototype

Spoiler

i was hiding down on those platforms where there are guns that shoot you when you hijack a chopper when the guy landed above me on the ship.

Spoiler

he then used the tendril devastator which went through the ship and killed me

 

[About To Crash]

Bioshock. Philip M. Jackson (Webcomic Artist of Sequential Art) pointed this out: occasionally it's impossible to hack something, because the exit for the current's flow with be completely surrounded by alarm tiles or something. It has happened to me three times.

 

[Deathsong17]

Pro Evolution Soccer 2009.

For examle, I was playing against my freind, when I passed back to the keeper. He ran out to kick it... and missed. I then ended up scoring an own goal. GNARGHH!!!

 

[Altorin]

I actually have a CPU cheating story

I played a game called Lords of Magic for the PC when I was a bit more of a tyke then I am now.. I was playing the Order Faction, and Order had a special unit, which I could only get one of, and I could only get at all, called Sir Lancelot.

I had my Sir Lancelot, and I was down to fighting the last faction - Death, and suddenly, a death army comes across the field of battle with a platoon of 50 Sir Lancelots.

I immediately stopped playing the game and never played it again.

 

[DigitalSushi]

The solitaire that came with my iPod. They're all impossible somehow.

Any RTS game. They know exactly where you are, ALL THE TIME.

This too.

I've one about 3 of those games of solitaire.

I created a tic-tac-toe game where it had to place a circle when you were going to win. I tried tricking it to make a descision between to places, and the damn thing placed a circle in both.

A strange game. The only winning move is not to play. How about a nice game of chess?

 

[DigitalSushi]

Rubberbanding.
Mariokart shows you the heads of the players driving along, you can see them moving faster than the top speed allows.

oh god, I hate that game, You'll almost cross the finish line and bowser will hit you with a homing turtle., and suddenly your tenth.

and you lose the flower cup,. and you fly off of rainbow road, and your life turns to shit.
f*cking game.

 

[XJ-0461]

In Burnout: Paradise, many times if you are driving in the right lane, a passing car will occasionally jump into oncoming traffic just to hit you.

Why you suicidal mini-van drivers, why?

My God, I hate that. When there's an oncoming car, you should not swerve into it. Why doesn't the game know this?

 

[Toners]

Empire Earth, yeah the original one.
I'm playing it through again and I'm stuck on the last Russian mission, having finished every other campaign...
Slightly unfair that they start two Epochs ahead of you with three cities, parts of your wall destroyed, unlimited resources... oh, and about 6 atomic bombers which are MORE than happy to run into your base and kill the fook out of everything.
Desperately trying to destroy their airbase... but the atomic bombers would rather destroy parts of their own base than let you get in. It's infuriating, really

 

[ProfessorLayton]

Street Fighter IV... there is no way that fat guy can punch me up into the air and spit on me like that while I can only get in about 2 punches as Sagat. I. Call. Bull. Shit. I swear I was playing on normal mode and I beat the first four or five guys easily and then once the sixth guy comes around, I cannot beat him no matter how hard I try. Maybe I'm just better on the PS3 (which I was), but I could not beat that sixth guy. It wasn't even close to fair and that is the only game where I have ever almost broken a controller out of frustration because of.

 

[Pimppeter2]

Nba live

ANY ONE OF THIER GAMES!!!

"Really Nba live?"

"When did Ray Allen start dunking?!?!"

"I don't care if he's rated 96, Lebron James is still a terrible shooter"

"Shaq can MOVE like THAT!"

And of course, when I tap A and it goes to the wrong player, resulting in a steal.

 

[Sindre1]

Solitaire. Sometimes its just imposible

 

[Ultress]

Rubberbanding.
Mariokart shows you the heads of the players driving along, you can see them moving faster than the top speed allows.

oh god, I hate that game, You'll almost cross the finish line and bowser will hit you with a homing turtle., and suddenly your tenth.

and you lose the flower cup,. and you fly off of rainbow road, and your life turns to shit.
f*cking game.

The Wii version is designed to torture the players. They invented a shell able to hit the guy coming first from any position. So the game punishes you for doing well.

Those games are for masochists, but damn if i don't love them.


Also the item I think your referring is the blue/spiny shell and that's been there since Mario Kart 64. If i'm wrong then ignore me

 

[Exocet]

Cossacks european wars.
In one mission,you're given 100 ukrainian riflemen(they fire the furthest,but have no melee attack) and you're told to rampage through an enemy filled map without any reinforcements.

Of course,the map is filled with ambushes.Fast cavalry that rush into melee ambushes.
But the biggest dick move is when you cross a small village,the computer,right before your soldiers capture houses by walking near them,self-destructs them,which makes them catch on fire,and a second later explodes,killing a few of your now scarse soldiers.

The end of the gaunlet is when you realise that on the tiny lake near the village,the computer built a huge motherfucking boat that has as many canons as you have troops.

I never got past that part of the map.Damn cheating computer.

 

[Aux]

Any RTS game. They know exactly where you are, ALL THE TIME.

I must agree with this!

 

[Antiparticle]

In the original Mortal Kombat, the computer is able to skip parts of an animation, if you shoot a projectile while it's standing up it can duck. The computer can grab you a few frames after it stopped walking(takes you half a second standing still) from further than you can kick, and it reads controller input.

Ah yes, Mortal Kombat. I remember well how the later opponents had a reaction time of exactly zero. The most annoying for me was always Kitana in MK2. Whenever she had me in a corner there was no way to get out of it anymore because she would always instantaneously counter anything I tried. I actually did an experiment once, I turned on infinite life for player 1, got into a corner, and see if she would always jump in the air and kick me if I tried to jump out of it. And yup, ten, twenty, thirty times in a row, she did, with perfect timing. I loved the old MK games but stuff like that was total bullshit.

 

[Torque669]

Loki.

Its like an upgraded graphically version of Diablo 2 but its incredibly hard. Not even funny most of the time.