Critical Miss: The Dragonslayer

[otakon17]

I've had this happen more than once. Damn dumb NPC's you have NO armor, no healing pots, and are using piss-weak weapons. JUST RUN AND HIDE! I've lost a trainer/follower and a blacksmith that way, those courageous dumbasses.

 

[Lord_Gremlin]

I'm assuming the reason he fears mudcrabs more than a dragon is because those mudcrabs have evolved sentience and have developed assault rifles...

The Elder Scrolls VI: Tyranny of Crabs.

 

[freaper]

Is his chesthair shaped like Skyrim? If it is, mad props to you good madam (sir? never figured)!

 

[Jaranja]

I think the NPCs are communists.

If one of them has a problem, the entire city will fight to the death to resolve it,

Y'know... I terrified myself earlier.

I was walking through Riverwood and I was a bit pissed off. I ended up punching a chicken that was roaming around. The second my blow landed, I heard an uproar from behind me. It turns out that chicken was their mayor in disguise or something because I got chased out of town by every single person and their Mum.

Ended up having to turn myself in at Whiterun to be able to complete quests.

 

[newwiseman]

This is too true not to laugh, I can't tell you how many merchant I've let die before engaging the dragon just to avoid the murder charge for them getting in the way of my magic.

 

[Rensenhito]

...my huscarl...

Wow, is it weird that I didn't notice the connection between housecarl and huscarl until you pointed it out? That makes perfect freaking sense.
I do also agree on your point about the dragons. The fact that they appear throughout the game is, I believe, the reason behind their lack of difficulty. Also contributing to that factor is the fact that they'll often land on their own and stand perfectly still so that you can stab them in the flank a good few times. I mean, seriously, when you can fly while breathing fire at that tiny little critter on the ground who's desperately trying to hit you with a Fus-Ro-Dah, WHY LAND? Skyrim dragons are not as bright as the game makes them out to be.

 

[aquarius87]

reminds me of the rpg Gothic.

specially the (worst game evar) Gothic 3 Forsaken Gods

Old Guy: "what lovely weather we're having..."
[I pull me weapon]
Old Guy jumps up and with a lower voice: "I'll tear you're f***ing head off!"

 

[SnakeoilSage]

Alright I admit it. I lol'ed.

 

[thenumberthirteen]

You have to take your hat off to the citizens of Skyrim, and their sky-forged steel nutsacks. I've seen many a townsfolk fight armed bandit hoards and creatures from the depth of nightmares with nothing more than their bare fists and their massive brass balls.

Then again you can rob them blind as long as you place buckets on their heads so maybe they're more rock stupid than rock hard.

 

[nyysjan]

I think the NPCs are communists.

If one of them has a problem, the entire city will fight to the death to resolve it,

Y'know... I terrified myself earlier.

I was walking through Riverwood and I was a bit pissed off. I ended up punching a chicken that was roaming around. The second my blow landed, I heard an uproar from behind me. It turns out that chicken was their mayor in disguise or something because I got chased out of town by every single person and their Mum.

Ended up having to turn myself in at Whiterun to be able to complete quests.

Which goes to show how good a survival strategy that is for the communities.
You mess with one of them, and you mess with all of them, and they all kick your ass.
So you end up not messing with them at all out of self preservation.

 

[Tharwen]

I think you mean 'Let's do this motherf-aaargh!'

 

[Thyunda]

They're Nords. What do you expect? Nords aren't afraid of anything, they'd discover a new land just to beat somebody up in it.

 

[Dango]

You might want to fix those italics on Elder Scrolls.

OT: I should really have this game by now...

 

[DTWolfwood]

...my huscarl...

Wow, is it weird that I didn't notice the connection between housecarl and huscarl until you pointed it out? That makes perfect freaking sense.
I do also agree on your point about the dragons. The fact that they appear throughout the game is, I believe, the reason behind their lack of difficulty. Also contributing to that factor is the fact that they'll often land on their own and stand perfectly still so that you can stab them in the flank a good few times. I mean, seriously, when you can fly while breathing fire at that tiny little critter on the ground who's desperately trying to hit you with a Fus-Ro-Dah, WHY LAND? Skyrim dragons are not as bright as the game makes them out to be.

glad to be of help

Im sure some intrepid modder is working hard to make the dragons beastly. can't wait to play the game over with it installed, saying of course i manage to finish the game i'm currently on. 90+ hours and i've yet to do the main quest pass getting the full force shout

 

[AbstractStream]

CRAB BATTLE!
Oops, sorry. Wrong game. It just seemed to fit so well.

 

[Mirror Cage]

Hee hee. That made my night.

It also reminded me of something that had been worrying me: if a dargon decides that he wants to give the guy lizard who has slain at least an entire family line of his kin a break, and swoops down on you in a town, full of handy overhangs with which to block his incendiary halitosis, do the normal townsfolk run for cover? I have not seen a (non-guard) NPC attacking a dargon yet, nor have I seen any charred peasants on the street after the fight, and to my knowledge, am not missing any NPCs that do not normally die during quests.

I get that that was the entire point of the comic, but I have never seen it myself.

 

[MrCalavera_v1legacy]

Is his chesthair shaped like Skyrim? If it is, mad props to you good madam (sir? never figured)!

Simple MERCHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANT!

 

[Ghengis John]

I was wondering what the design meeting for this was like:
Bethesda employee one: "Okay so nobody liked the cliff racers in morrowind..."
Bethesda employee two: "So we should avoid making a creature that swoops down from the sky and interrupts whatever you're doing right?"
B1: "Was that people's problem with cliffracers?"
B2: "What do you mean?"
B1: "Clearly the problem was that the cliffracers weren't large enough. The only logical thing to do is to bring the cliffracers back, but make them ten times bigger!"
B2: "Excelsior!"

And suddenly everyone loves them.

 

[pffh]

I was wondering what the design meeting for this was like:
Bethesda employee one: "Okay so nobody liked the cliff racers in morrowind..."
Bethesda employee two: "So we should avoid making a creature that swoops down from the sky and interrupts whatever you're doing right?"
B1: "Was that people's problem with cliffracers?"
B2: "What do you mean?"
B1: "Clearly the problem was that the cliffracers weren't large enough. The only logical thing to do is to bring the cliffracers back, but make them ten times bigger!"
B2: "Excelsior!"

And suddenly everyone loves them.

And now that we have dragons they NEED to bring the actual cliffracers back so they can kill all the dragons like they did in Vvardenfell.

 

[Angry_squirrel]

It would also be awesome if they had nests in caves and on mountains where you can sneak up on them whilst they're sleeping. I miss that feature a lot. Dragons have to sleep too you know? Give a stealthy non-combat character a chance at doing a 15x sneak attack on those eil lizards. Please?

There are mountains guaranteed to have dragons on, just look for the dragons head on the compass. And they can also be snuck (is that a word?) up on. They see you if they are looking at you though, but I did it yesterday by climbing over the back of the mountain, then attacking his tail which was dangling from where he was perched.