Dark Souls isn't about being a 'snob', or an 'elitist'. The only people who are labelling the game in this way are the ones who aren't enjoying the experience; not every game is supposed to be enjoyed by every person.
Dark Souls is about the gameplay from yester-year's games brought kicking and screaming into the modern age for better and for worse.
Duke Nukem Forever tried and failed to bring the old school FPS mentality into the modern age. Dark Souls has successfully translated the gameplay of the original Metroid, Castlevania and Ghost and Ghouls games into the current generation, like Demon Soul's before it.
It's hard. Frustratingly so. Some of why is sheer difficulty; monsters with lots of health. Lots of long fights strewn together between check points. Some of it is mechanical; using a checkpoint respawns the monsters, as does dying. And some of it is simply for the sake of making it harder to finish the game; one hit kill monsters, traps, item prices, unforgiving of mistakes, etc.
Dark Souls, like Demon Souls, is a masterpiece. There isn't some "easy mode" to activate, there isn't some "trick" to making the game require less time, effort and broken controllers. Not everyone is going to get to the end. Not everyone is going to enjoy the journey. But, it's for those reasons that the rest of us enjoy the game.
I prefer games that require me to actually learn the game's ins and outs. Halo, Call of Duty, Fable, Mass Effect, Oblivion, Darksiders, The Sims, Crysis; they all have their fans and are all, generally, pretty great games. They're also pretty damn easy to finish, and have so many mechanics designed to make sure I get to the end of the game that actually getting to the end has little to no meaning.
Dark Souls is gameplay from an age where finishing even ONE of the games you owned was an achievement. When the end screen was earnt with blood, sweat and tears - it wasn't handed to you. It's not for everyone. Me? It's a GOTY contender. If it's not for you, _trade it in and shut up_.