Dealing with Flying

Saelune

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Mar 8, 2011
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I am super afraid of flying. Before it was cool. Its more a coincidence that I havent been on a plane since before 9/11.

My family has accomodated that by driving anywhere we go on vacation, but aside from one month long trip around the country, we dont go too far.

But my mom is going to across country in the near future for a trip, and for certain reasons, its very important to her I go too, but...planes.

Im really curious what other people do to deal with flying? Obviously more looking for people who also arent comfortable with it. If your answer is "suck it up" well, no.

Ive considered sleeping meds, but I am the type who doesnt even like taking aspirin for headaches or anything like that.

Also never even been in an airport since then, so I dont even know what thats like. Is it still all overly "secure" or have they laxed up? Ive really only got TV to go on, and I dont know if they exaggerate that or not...

Edit: Drinking game, take a shot every time someone says "statistically..."
 

Neurotic Void Melody

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Jul 15, 2013
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I'm the type to just settle for drinking away any irrational fears as a temporary solution. However, that probably seems like something other people will not appreciate as a form of advice, so...is it heights? Terrorists? The whole being dependent on man-made technology to stay alive? Recycled sweaty air? Maybe check out some online anxiety advice sites, I know they exist somewhere. US airports I know little about, but here in the UK it really depends on the size and popularity of the airport as to how secure they act. Small airports are often a little easier. But it won't be as a bad as you're imagining.

Some links for advice;

http://www.anxieties.com/84/flying-comfortably

http://fearofflyingschool.com/10-fear-of-flying-tips-from-the-most-followed-therapists-on-twitter

https://www.anxietyuk.org.uk/our-services/anxiety-information/anxiety-disorders/fear-of-flying/

Hope they can be of more use than me. ;)
 

sky14kemea

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Jun 26, 2008
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As someone who's used to flying by themself, (Themselves? fuck you spellcheck) I find the security has stayed pretty much the same.

Some airports have those fancy full-body scanners, some don't. (I think it's mostly the American ones that do).

The only two ways I can think of going about this is either ask a ton of questions. I.e The more you know the less you'll be scared. Or bring lots of distractions with you. Handheld device things, ipad, laptop if you can be bothered lugging it around. If it's more than 2 hours they'll probably have movies on the flight.

Also bring some kind of candy to suck on during take-off/landing. Helps stop your ears from popping. :)
 

Addendum_Forthcoming

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Feb 4, 2009
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Booze. Shitload of booze. I don't have a fear of flying, I hate flying. Helos are okay. Planes, on the otherhand, suck. You're stuck in a chair. And business class doesn't make that confinement any better barring not having some fat fuck use up both seats beside them. Back in the good ol' days, you could bring a 2L coke bottle that was probably full of whiskey. But you can't even do that anymore on long flights. Even in business class they restrict the number of drinks you can have. Fuck commercial air travel.

No cigarettes, and they were talking about taking your lighters off you as well. So if you get there at 11PM ... you can't just streak past customs (assuming you don't get deadlocked or don't have a special pass to be personally inspected by a head of security to avoid the queues) ... you can't even light up as soon as you get off the plane.

I hate flying.

I really can't think of any advice other than booze. But you won't ever get enough, now. Try pre-drinking enough to be drunk before you pass the gate, but not enough that you'll vomit at the passport check.

One piece of advice I can give, try losing your passport 4 working days before you alight back home if your passport is nearing expiry or you don't mind losing $200. Then go to your embassy, ask for emergency papers, and then you can avoid the queues to go back home. This worked like a charm at Narita ... because fuck Narita.
 

Glongpre

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Saelune said:
I am super afraid of flying.
The obvious question is, why are you afraid of flying?

Planes are pretty safe. Getting checked by security isn't a horror movie. I got selected for a random search on my second trip, and they make you go into a plastic box (well, it doesn't have sides, just a front face), and I was grinning at the situation because it seems so absurd.

But yea, what is it that frightens you?
 

Saelune

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Glongpre said:
Saelune said:
I am super afraid of flying.
The obvious question is, why are you afraid of flying?

Planes are pretty safe. Getting checked by security isn't a horror movie. I got selected for a random search on my second trip, and they make you go into a plastic box (well, it doesn't have sides, just a front face), and I was grinning at the situation because it seems so absurd.

But yea, what is it that frightens you?
Plummeting to my death.
 

Johnny Novgorod

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Statiscally speaking your life is probably way more in danger right now than it'll ever be on a plane.
And yes, booze. I have a cousin who gets wasted every time he has to board a plane. No two ways about it.
 

Dirty Hipsters

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Saelune said:
Glongpre said:
Saelune said:
I am super afraid of flying.
The obvious question is, why are you afraid of flying?

Planes are pretty safe. Getting checked by security isn't a horror movie. I got selected for a random search on my second trip, and they make you go into a plastic box (well, it doesn't have sides, just a front face), and I was grinning at the situation because it seems so absurd.

But yea, what is it that frightens you?
Plummeting to my death.
Statistically you're much more likely to die in a car accident than you are to be in a plane crash, so the plane is much safer than all those road-trips you've been taking.

Plus, if your jet crashes it's pretty much guaranteed instant death with no suffering, which is way better than crashing in a car, getting stuck, and burning to death.
 

Thaluikhain

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Johnny Novgorod said:
Statiscally speaking your life is probably way more in danger right now than it'll ever be on a plane.
Tis true, a surprising number of escapist forumers and contributors have been eaten by cannibals. This may go some way to explain the complaints of the site's decline in recent years.
 

Level 7 Dragon

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Mar 29, 2011
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I understand. When you get sick in a car, you can walk out of the car. When you get sick on the plane, you can't walk out of the plane.

Statistically, you have about the same chance of being killed in a plane crash as you are being struck by lightning twice. So, don't worry.
 

Addendum_Forthcoming

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Dirty Hipsters said:
Plus, if your jet crashes it's pretty much guaranteed instant death with no suffering, which is way better than crashing in a car, getting stuck, and burning to death.
Hell naw ...

Depends on the length of the flight to be honest. The more hours in the air, the more likely you are to pass open bodies of water. The more open water you fly over, the increased likelihood of actually drowning to death, not simply going up in a fireball of wreckage :(

Even then, suffocation remains a big killer in jet aircraft incidents. If you're in a situation where yu canb burn to death, you're in a situation where you'll die by smoke inhalation, after all. In fact, Boeing did a study back in 1971 that suggested that if you want to survive a catastrophic commercial jetliner incident, you should be seated towards the rear of the jet ... and you are 40% more likelier to survive than if you were sitting in the bow compartments.

So with margins that large, impact deaths alone are not as high as one may think.

Of course, the question remains whether you'll want to survive the impact after you take into account death by smoke inhalation or death by persistent crushing. Which is oddly likely to happen to 'survivors' as well. You want to know what also measureably increases your chances of survival? Wearing reinforced ppe gear. Heavy jeans, jacket, and boots. Less likely to cut yourself to ribbons when you or first responders try to dig you out of a wreck.

(edit) A lot of people hurt themselves and kill themselves in the advent of a plane crash. Basically youhave about 30 seconds before a plane that put down in an ocean, lake or river begins to fill with water or smoke. This is why being within a few rows of the emergency exits increase survival. The faster you can get away from an accident, the better. Of course, given twisted heaps of metal and plastic tend to tear flesh, so many people end up with life threatening injuries AFTER impact.

Not only that, but people are idiots. They willingly ignore the things that would otherwise save them. How to brace. Where's the life jacket. Buckle their seat belts when told. The 15 survivors of the TransAsia downing in Taiwan survived (including a toddler) because they followed instructions and knew how to properly brace for impact.

There is a reason why they drill the shit out of you to do this stuff in the armed forces. How to properly brace, etc. It saves lives and reduces injury. Reducing injury and saving more lives goes on to save more lives by less people putting themselves in danger to help others who would have been more danger prone by not following instruction. There's a sort of 'cascading failure' with panic and general chaos. Where things are made exponentially worse with merely small increments of additional problems layered ontop of eachother.

This is why you end up with miracle stories in the first place. Where statistical odds don't adequately reflect the reality of an incident. Solely because people have that rare confluence when they do all the right things and thus, miracle on the surface, but beneath that merely the correct course of actions taken that limit injury, and thus maximise all possible agency of people and the effectiveness of the options available.

This is why FAA analysts still say that 90% of lethal jetliner accidents are survivable. As in there is a guarantee there would be survivors if all passengers followed the safety instructions freely on offer. That's not to say that if you do, you will survive. But that your chances of survival are far, far, far higher if you do. Not only that, your ability to survive is also maximised when you have a person behind do all the right things as well. When that seatbelt warning light goes on, it's not just your safety on the line. Other people are counting on you doing the right thing also to increase their odds of survival.
 

Kolby Jack

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Apr 29, 2011
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I've flown a lot, ever since I was a kid. My dad was in the military and either of my parents sides of the family lived across the country no matter where we lived, plus we went on several international vacations. Then I joined the military, which caused me to need to fly a lot too. Flying never really bothered me unless I was sick, but lately I've noticed I get weirdly uneasy on planes now when landing. I don't know if I can describe it as fear or airsickness, but it's somewhere between those two feelings for me. I get a little sick to my stomach, a little cold, and somewhat lightheaded and it doesn't really fade until I get off the plane. It definitely didn't happen to me until the last year or so. I don't know what the deal is, it might just be an age thing.

But to me, it sounds like you need advice on dealing with an irrational fear over dealing with flying itself. Unfortunately, the only way to push past that fear that I know of is indeed to suck it up. I have a terrible fear of heights, but you can't get through boot camp without jumping off a 30 foot high board, which is WELL beyond my comfort zone to say the least. When it came time to do it, I simply went up there, toed the edge, and let them push me. I was so terrified on the way down I actually forgot how to swim for a few seconds, which almost made them force me out of the pool.

Now, I wouldn't say my fear is conquered. I'm still very much afraid of heights and don't plan on jumping off any more high dives if I can help it, but if you gotta do it, you gotta do it. The solution isn't really to not be afraid, it's just to get yourself to the point where your fear becomes irrelevant, and when your fear is irrelevant, hopefully it won't be as powerful. So just get on the plane, strap in, take some deep breaths, and you'll probably be fine. Unless you're prone to panic attacks, but if that's the case you shouldn't get on the plane unless it's really life or death; the last thing you want to do on a plane these days is create a big scene.

Or sleep meds. Couldn't hurt.
 

Gordon_4_v1legacy

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Take a belt of scotch and a Valium (but be scientific about it, get one appropriate to your size and length of the flight).
 

mizushinzui

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When I was a kid I had no issues flying, went to Spain, Crete and France on planes and no problems in sight.

Last year me and my girlfriend decide to go to Amsterdam together, and at this point it's been a few years since I was last on a flight and I remember not having any issues with it. So we get to the airport and wait around for our flight, then as soon as we're on the plane I start freaking out and feeling like I'm about to have a heart attack, totally wasn't expecting it.

Now me and my other half have plans to visit Japan and I don't know how I'm going to deal with it. My girlfriends family recommended that tried Diazepam because her mom hates flying too and it helps her out, but I feel dubious about taking prescription medication that isn't mine just so I can take a flight.

From what I've heard elsewhere the two major solutions are flight fear classes, and lots and lots of booze.
 

09philj

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Saelune said:
I am super afraid of flying. Before it was cool. Its more a coincidence that I havent been on a plane since before 9/11.

My family has accomodated that by driving anywhere we go on vacation, but aside from one month long trip around the country, we dont go too far.

But my mom is going to across country in the near future for a trip, and for certain reasons, its very important to her I go too, but...planes.

Im really curious what other people do to deal with flying? Obviously more looking for people who also arent comfortable with it. If your answer is "suck it up" well, no.

Ive considered sleeping meds, but I am the type who doesnt even like taking aspirin for headaches or anything like that.

Also never even been in an airport since then, so I dont even know what thats like. Is it still all overly "secure" or have they laxed up? Ive really only got TV to go on, and I dont know if they exaggerate that or not...

Edit: Drinking game, take a shot every time someone says "statistically..."
I don't like flying because it's dull most of the time. The only unnerving parts are take off and landing, which are over very quickly. To take your mind off those, something to fidget with or chew on might help.
 

Zen Bard

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Sep 16, 2012
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My wife also hates flying, so she sometimes pops half a Xanax before the flight. It makes her loopy and chill enough not to mind. And it makes the trip super entertaining for me!

In all seriousness, I get you. I've racked up some 300K miles on American and I still hate flying. It's claustrophobic, a hassle and your life is completely in someone else's hand. In addition, my dad used to fly private planes and I have a degree in aerospace engineering so I'm hyper aware of every little thing the plane and pilot does.

But the pre-flight checklist is pretty extensive and they'll ground the plane if any little thing is out of whack. I once sat on the tarmac for an hour because one of the cabin lights was out and they wanted to make sure it wasn't a glitch in the electrical harness.

So yeah...flying is a pain in the ass. But it's fairly safe.
 

krystalphoenix

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I've been told I'm either the best of worst person to sit next to on the plane as I can explain away the noises (Aeronautical Engineer) but the second I can't explain a noise people panic.

But, tell the crew discretely as possible that you are a nervous flyer. They will do everything in their power to help you. It may just be making sure to check on you as they do their walks through the cabin to seeing if you need another drink. They will help you.

Otherwise, try an aromatherapy oil. Something like rose or chamomile. Soak it into a tissue and carry it with you to sniff to help you relax.
 

Section Crow

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I myself have never been bothered by flying, though my brother and father have both been afraid of flying.

My dad hates the take-off and landing of the plane which is fair enough as it is the most obtrusive and noisy part of the trip, he deals with this by putting in headphones and drifting away into his mind taking away focus, which makes it easier for him to deal with. My brother developed it, despite having flown a good number of times previously he became terrified of flying and took some medication (Don't know specifically what he took, just something to help with nerves) to alleviate that fear which, pretty much stopped the fear dead in his tracks as he no longer needs them to fly anymore.

I hope everything goes well regardless of whether you choose to fly or not.