Death or Cake?

[Lord Kloo]

Okay..

I take option 1 but defeating Gamall from Thief: Deadly Shadows is going to be a bugger - shes invincible..

Well, at least I'll, at some stage in my epic quest for Heaven, be transformed into a Lego man, finally..

 

[Enigmatic Master]

Ok, let's say that hypothetically, you have died.
You go to the gates of the afterlife, and are presented with two options

1) You are sent into hell, and must battle and defeat every single boss that you have ever beaten in a video game.
For each boss, you are given the equipment, armor, and weapons that you first used to defeat them in the game, i.e., battling the Tank from L4D, you might be given an AK-47 and pain pills, whereas if you are battling the Brute Chieftain, you would be given MJOLNIR armor and the signature halo assault rifle. However, your physical and mental shape remain the same as they are right now, so you may find yourself exhausted after only a few swings of Kratos's blades when up against Ares.
You feel every prick of pain put upon you by the bosses, but you have unlimited lives, though you will be forced to consciously witness and feel your own death many, many times.
If you succeed in defeating every single boss, and depending on your gaming repertoire there may be hundreds of them, you win access into heaven. In heaven are all of your dead friends and relatives, along with all of the bro-tastic characters from every game that you've every played, i.e, Garrus, Sgt. Johnson, Captain Price, The Entire Cast of TF2, etc.

2) You are sent to limbo for all eternity. Floating in nothingness forever, but hey, you don't have to watch yourself get disembowled over and over.

WHAT DO YOU DO?

Where's the cake come in?

 

[Ekonk]

I think I'll get used to getting disemboweled. Also the cast of TF2 as drinking buddies = epic win.

 

[Hazard12]

hmmm...Darksiders could have some tricky fights. I dare any man to successfully wield that sword.

 

[Blackmagic1515]

Option 1. Xemnas? Easy. Genesis? Piece of cake. Sephiroth? No sweat.
An eternity with Cloud, Squall, Sora, Zack and all those guys is totally worth a few gruesome deaths. Bring it on!

 

[Ciran]

I would go with option 1, most definitely. I would probably go insane very quickly with option 2, but then again if I'm the only one there I would probably build an entirely fictional delusional world for myself to exist in as a symptom of my insanity and since I'm the only one there who's to say it's not real, which presents its own appeal.

 

[Dorian6]

I'd go with option 1. Pain is nothing more than a physical response by your body to tell you when something is harming it.

If I'm dead, my body has already been destroyed and pain is nonexistant.

Plus, I'd rather fight my enemies than exist alone in an empty void forever

 

[Bek359]

Option 1. I'd die a lot, but it's better than slowly going mad in darkness and nothingness and silence for an eternity. Plus, I'd be able to use all sorts of cool shit at different points.

By any chance, is the title of this thread a reference to Eddie Izzard's "Cake or Death" routine?

Tea and cake or death, tea and cake or death, tea and cake or death!

 

[Parivir]

Option 1: allthough it will be insane I mean;
every boss from FF 1,2,3,4,7,8 plus most from 9,10,12,13
half the bosses from, I wanna be the guy
at least 43 versions of Robotnik
and an absolute ton more as I have played over two hundred games

But I would do just about anything over eternal boredom.

 

[Cheesus333]

*looks through games*

Diablo 2, eh... does that mean I can skip all the game bosses and just beat Satan's arse up and down his unholy halls until he sends me away?

 

[Mstrswrd]

Option 1; eventually you'll become basically immune to pain, and you'll get in shape. Over time, you really will be able to do those video game things because, hey, you have en eternity to achieve those abilities.

 

[KnowYourOnion]

Nope, you fight them just as you did the first time that you beat them... re-hashed games do count though... if you played all of the zeldas, have fun with the Gannon overload.

Ohh that's ok, and - the Zelda thing - slightly sucks

By the way, if the "Cake or Death" thing is an Eddie Izzard reference, could I have the chicken...?

Tastes of human!
Thank you for flying Church of England

 

[TheMetalGuy]

How the **** am i going to kill like a million reapers???
But hey if i'm the only one that respawns i will [EVENTUALLY] win ;P

 

[dragonslayer32]

Option 1. Eventually I will defeat them so it is basically a pass into heaven.

 

[meepop]

Option 1 please! I'd have a good time (when not being horribly mutilated) with the novelty of every scene change, getting all sorts of fun weaponry etc
Also if they're bosses I've beaten already I will at least have an idea to go about killing them! Just... I would be dreading any sort of Final Fantasy boss though... I mean how am I going to beat Sephiroth if I've not spent an entire game powering up and have to be my own stupid self?!

Hey, OP, do, uh, party members count? There is no way I'd ever be able to beat some bosses.

Although, at least I'd get the satisfaction of punching Lance upside the face. FUCK YOU AND YOUR UNDERLEVELED DRAGONITE!

I think you've found the one loophole! Hurray for games like Left 4 Dead and Killing Floor! Yeah, I'd go with option one...*Remembers he's playing Amnesia and all the horrible memories* Uhhh...Is there a third option not involving my sanity coming into questi--*Remembers the guy from Amnesia was normal* Oh wait yeah ok. Although I'm screwed when it comes to Shadow of the Colossus, Just Cause 2, and Demon's Souls. But I will enjoy Plants Vs. Zombies and Portal!

 

[Pontus Hashis]

1 ofc !!!!11one!!
Hardest part will be killing The Boss and or her horse...
And if i start of with the sorrow it will be easy, but if he is in the end 0_0

 

[Extasii]

Option 1
Even if it includes Innoruk, RAAM, Jack of Blades, and that lil magician dude from Castle Crashers...
Hey, at least I never played Force Unleashed, God of War, Demon's Souls, or Vanquish XD

...

shit... WoW raid bosses...
we get 24 party members, right?

 

[Pontus Hashis]

Also, when i get to heaven, i will rip the head of "god"

 

[everfreeDragon]

Option 2. Cause what am I going to do in Heaven?

n heaven are all of your dead friends and relatives, along with all of the bro-tastic characters from every game that you've every played, i.e, Garrus, Sgt. Johnson, Captain Price, The Entire Cast of TF2, etc.

OT: Option 1 all the way! I'd become the ultimate badass then get to be all nostalgic with Garrus when I finally meet him again after defeating ever ME Boss with him at my side!

Edit: Also Meta-gaming FTW!I'd take advantage of knowing their secret moves and abilities in advance.

 

[The Red Spy]

I'm wondering about the times I'd need double jump... Playing Crash Bandicoot just made my life/death much harder.
Other than that, I've got Lucien, at AT-AH, Jedi, Scion's, Harbinger's, Praetorian (*2), H. Reaper, Fontaine, Big Daddy's & Little Sisters, numerous helicopter gunships & support helicopters and another plethora of things.

They are providing ammo right?

Also, I get to choose the soundtrack in the background. Either something awesome, or something atrocious to provoke me.

This would be the silver lining.