The fact that I literally have nothing to look forward now, and that life and the world as I know will all just cease to exist sometime.
In the wider scale of things, every life form on this planet is insignificant, as is the aforementioned planet, so essentially, all of us are just lazily going through the motions until we reach the unknown world of death.
How much of a depressed, pessimistic bastard I am, and I?m only 16. How the fuck am I going to survive in the next couple of years, especially with my A-Levels and my overall incompetence at 99% of everything that I do? This basically means that I probably will never amount to anything of worth, and all my dreams of becoming a rich and successful writer akin to J.K. Rowling is just that?dreams.
I feel like I have no control over myself or my life, and I loathe myself. I always complain about not having a girlfriend, but admittedly, I?m frigid, I?d probably just hurt anyone who?d get close to me, and I have to learn to love myself before I can actually learn others, which is probably why I?ve deluded myself into thinking that I fancy a couple of girls that I barely even know just based on the fact that they?re more friends of friends and are kind to me.
Humans living longer. Better health does not necessarily mean better quality of life, so it could essentially mean for me and a lot of other people a longer time to feel like shit, unless we have the stones to kill ourselves. I?m scared of humans, and I?d rather not we have our lifespan extended even more than they should be?
The fact that I felt so much happier when I was younger, before around the time I turned 14. Ignorance (and lack of worries or responsibilities) sure is bliss. And I?ll never be able to regain those times of happiness. Not exactly, at least.
We will probably never know all the answers to the universe, not least of all those that actually make sense. I mean, yeah, we know about particles and shit works, but why? Why must they work like that? Why can?t I or they do this and that?
I have so much stress at the moment that the only time I can ever truly relax is when I?m drunk.