Quantum was so unpleasant it was the last Craig movie I even bothered to see in theaters. Just horribly edited, on top of an ungainly plot. Don't know what happened there.
Discuss and Rate the Last Film You Watched
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Writer's strike really messed with it. They were not only literally writing the script and filming at the same time, but they had people who by their own admission didn't know what they were doing in that side of the business writing the script, like Daniel Craig himself. It's not a surprise the plot was a mess.
Watched Guillermo del Toro's Frankenstein. I have a pretty good theater combo going (Weapons, One Battle After Another, Frankenstein). While the sets all look very busy and very pretty I'm not convinced some of the effects are up to theater code. Which is to say, the Netflix is showing a little bit, but not nearly enough to ruin the thing.
I haven't seen the Branagh version, but this is as close to the book as adaptations have gotten, as far as I can tell. There's a few changes: Elizabeth isn't Victor's fiancee anymore, but William's, who has been aged up and essentially taken over the Henry Clerval role; by a little too much coincidence she also happens to be the niece of Victor's shady benefactor/financier, a made-up character played by Christoph Waltz. Meanwhile the specifics of the creature's rampage have been fudged so as to portray him more sympathetically, which I don't think was really necessary, anymore than we needed characters telling Victor Frankenstein "It's you - you're the real monster!".
I did enjoy it quite a lot despite the rather pointless melodramatic twists that don't go anywhere, like what's going on with the Waltz character or the tepid love quadrangle. Namely I think Elordi steals the movie. He's all kinds of great in this, and his side of the story I found very moving, even if he looks a little too much like the Prometheus alien at first.
I haven't seen the Branagh version, but this is as close to the book as adaptations have gotten, as far as I can tell. There's a few changes: Elizabeth isn't Victor's fiancee anymore, but William's, who has been aged up and essentially taken over the Henry Clerval role; by a little too much coincidence she also happens to be the niece of Victor's shady benefactor/financier, a made-up character played by Christoph Waltz. Meanwhile the specifics of the creature's rampage have been fudged so as to portray him more sympathetically, which I don't think was really necessary, anymore than we needed characters telling Victor Frankenstein "It's you - you're the real monster!".
I did enjoy it quite a lot despite the rather pointless melodramatic twists that don't go anywhere, like what's going on with the Waltz character or the tepid love quadrangle. Namely I think Elordi steals the movie. He's all kinds of great in this, and his side of the story I found very moving, even if he looks a little too much like the Prometheus alien at first.
A ★★★½ review of House on Haunted Hill (1959)
“It was my wife’s idea to have our guests come in funeral cars. Heh, she’s so amusing. Her sense of humor is, shall we say, original. I dreamed up the hearse. It’s empty now, but after the night on Haunted Hill, who knows?” Like many William Castle productions, there was a publicity gimmick when...
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I just watched 28 Years Later, and it was kinda dumb. First off it lacks the grainy, raw visual "quality" of the first movie - the opening scene is harrowing in concept, but in execution it feels tremendously lacking. Here's a scene where dozens of scared kids are getting massacred by rage zombies, and I can't help but notice how flat and cheap the whole thing looks. Secondly I quite dislike the use of music. If your point is to show how cut off from modern comforts these people are, using songs that they would not have had access to in over 20 years doesn't help.
We also have zombie types now, which I'm not one to label something as 'videogamey' in a derogatory way, but here I'm like... why? Not that I'm saying the 28 movies are above that necessarily, but the first movie never had a need for it. The zombies were enraged, screaming and roaring sprinters; that's really all that was needed to depict how scary, destructive, and despair inducing they were to the survivors. If they wanted a scene with a crawling zombie, just have a crawling zombie. If they wanted a scene with big mega zombie, just have a big mega zombie. There was no need to explain why or have zombie types.
Speaking of, the amount of zombie dicks this movie dishes out is eyebrowing raising to say the least. I'm far from against dong on screen, but one big floppy dong is not the other. And with the "alfa" zombie(s) displayed with their giant flaccid cucumbers in centre frame almost 100% of the time I can't help but think the film makers were a bit too keen on the full-frontal zombie shock factor.
Then we get to the story/characters... *sigh* This is where things get really dumb. I'll get the least offensive one out of the way first, and that's the fact that the zombies are even still around 28 years later. With how quickly the rage virus spreads and kills it means it would also eat through a population so fast that it would burn itself out just as quickly. The first movie implies by the end that the infected can't sustain themselves and pretty much starve. But in 28 Years Later they're still around 28 years later? Where the hell is it getting new humans to infect? The movie sorta tries to explain this by showing the infected actually eat meat, but even then.
The biggest problem though is our three main characters, and how fucking stupid they are. The movie speed runs the dissent in the son for his father. It's obvious the tough love approach from his father, his lying, and his cheating on his wife is going to boil over, but the movie just skips the build-up and has the son pull a knife on his father almost immediately after finding out. Then we have the dad, and I know he's a bit of a prick, but he really couldn't have just sat his son down to explain why his mom's illness would very likely necessitate medical equipment that is no longer available in the country, doctor be damned? And finally we have the mother who suspected she had cancer, but still let her 12-year old son take her out into the dangerous, infected riddled wasteland to find a maybe doctor? When she KNEW?! I mean, she was lucid enough to say she suspected and to comfort her son about her terminal illness, then why for the fucking love of God did she not tell her son to turn back or better yet not bother even leaving, when he told her they were leaving to find a doctor?
Oh yeah, and let's leave the baby born from a zombie on the porch of this isolated community. Great idea! Best outcome; they kill the baby. Worst outcome; the baby carries the infection and infects everyone there.
We also have zombie types now, which I'm not one to label something as 'videogamey' in a derogatory way, but here I'm like... why? Not that I'm saying the 28 movies are above that necessarily, but the first movie never had a need for it. The zombies were enraged, screaming and roaring sprinters; that's really all that was needed to depict how scary, destructive, and despair inducing they were to the survivors. If they wanted a scene with a crawling zombie, just have a crawling zombie. If they wanted a scene with big mega zombie, just have a big mega zombie. There was no need to explain why or have zombie types.
Speaking of, the amount of zombie dicks this movie dishes out is eyebrowing raising to say the least. I'm far from against dong on screen, but one big floppy dong is not the other. And with the "alfa" zombie(s) displayed with their giant flaccid cucumbers in centre frame almost 100% of the time I can't help but think the film makers were a bit too keen on the full-frontal zombie shock factor.
Then we get to the story/characters... *sigh* This is where things get really dumb. I'll get the least offensive one out of the way first, and that's the fact that the zombies are even still around 28 years later. With how quickly the rage virus spreads and kills it means it would also eat through a population so fast that it would burn itself out just as quickly. The first movie implies by the end that the infected can't sustain themselves and pretty much starve. But in 28 Years Later they're still around 28 years later? Where the hell is it getting new humans to infect? The movie sorta tries to explain this by showing the infected actually eat meat, but even then.
The biggest problem though is our three main characters, and how fucking stupid they are. The movie speed runs the dissent in the son for his father. It's obvious the tough love approach from his father, his lying, and his cheating on his wife is going to boil over, but the movie just skips the build-up and has the son pull a knife on his father almost immediately after finding out. Then we have the dad, and I know he's a bit of a prick, but he really couldn't have just sat his son down to explain why his mom's illness would very likely necessitate medical equipment that is no longer available in the country, doctor be damned? And finally we have the mother who suspected she had cancer, but still let her 12-year old son take her out into the dangerous, infected riddled wasteland to find a maybe doctor? When she KNEW?! I mean, she was lucid enough to say she suspected and to comfort her son about her terminal illness, then why for the fucking love of God did she not tell her son to turn back or better yet not bother even leaving, when he told her they were leaving to find a doctor?
Oh yeah, and let's leave the baby born from a zombie on the porch of this isolated community. Great idea! Best outcome; they kill the baby. Worst outcome; the baby carries the infection and infects everyone there.
A ★★★½ review of Phantasm II (1988)
"You think that when you die, you go to Heaven. You come to us!" This sequel to the cult classic from 1979 had some troubles getting made. While under pressure to make a sequel, series creator Don Coscarelli simply had writer's block, unable to come up with a story after finding the first movie...
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Rewatched Ocean's Eleven with my girlfriend (she hadn't seen it). I learn Brad Pitt is clearly George Clooney's wife, but also Matt Damon's husband, and when the three are together Matt is their son. The more you know!
A ★★★★ review of The Woman in Black (2012)
“They took her boy away, so now she takes us.” The second adaptation of the novel by Susan Hill, this film did not have many noteworthy elements to its production, other than the fact that it was originally considered as a 3D movie before that idea was kiboshed. However, the rating was a...
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I hope that's not a dig at one of of my favorite movies of all time, because I WILL fight you. I don't disagree with your sentiments at all, but don't mention "my" movie without saying you loved it. Pitt's and Clooney's chemistry (rather Rusty's and Danny's chemistry) is cinematic brilliance. Please tell me your girlfriend loved it, then tell me you're both going to watch Ocean's 12 and 13, then tell me about the passionate marathon sex you had after... okay, you can leave out that last part, but the rest, I demand.
A ★★½ review of The Black Scorpion (1957)
“When I’ve already got half a dozen questions I can’t answer, I try to ignore any new ones.” As a B-movie from the 1950's, there isn't much to discuss on production outside of the visual effects that I'll get into later. However, this film is notable for one thing. It was featured on the first...
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Weapons
From the same mind that brought us Barbarian, comes something even more fucked up but ultimately less satisfying. He seems to have a fetish for grotesque female antagonists. The progression is more creative but it kinda has to be to tell this kind of story involving a handful of different characters.
Worth it if you liked Barbarian, but mileage will vary on the payoff.
From the same mind that brought us Barbarian, comes something even more fucked up but ultimately less satisfying. He seems to have a fetish for grotesque female antagonists. The progression is more creative but it kinda has to be to tell this kind of story involving a handful of different characters.
Worth it if you liked Barbarian, but mileage will vary on the payoff.
A ★★½ review of The Jungle Book (1967)
“I’ll learn him everything I know!” “That shouldn’t take too long.” This film had a fair bit of trouble during production. While Walt Disney had been eyeing making an adaptation out of Rudyard Kipling's "The Jungle Book" since the late 1930's, headway wasn't really made until Bill Peet proposed...
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A ★★½ review of I Know What You Did Last Summer (2025)
“Warm welcome.” “I thought someone was coming to murder me. This is worse.” Plans to remake the first film were announced in 2014, with both Mike Flanagan and Jeff Howard writing a script and a planned release in 2016. At that point, Flanagan confirmed it was to be a full reboot, with no...
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Just went to the cinema for the first time in over three years (last movie I saw in a cinema was The Batman) to see Chainsaw Man The Movie Reze Arc. Bit of an unwieldy title, but basically, it's a continuation of where the anime left off at the end of the first season. As a result, it doesn't really take any time on establishing the setting or the rules and just jumps right into it, which is a benefit to the pacing but kinda shuts out new viewers. It's kind of a pity, because I really enjoyed the movie, but I also really enjoyed the show and would recommend watching it even if there wasn't the movie to go to afterwards.
It's violent, fucked-up, unapologetically horny, and more meaningful than a lot of crap that acted like it meant something. (For the record, I did enjoy The Batman too.)
ETA: Turns out the last movie I watched in the cinema was actually Interstella 5555, and that was also good but I guess it kinda slid off me in hindsight.
It's violent, fucked-up, unapologetically horny, and more meaningful than a lot of crap that acted like it meant something. (For the record, I did enjoy The Batman too.)
ETA: Turns out the last movie I watched in the cinema was actually Interstella 5555, and that was also good but I guess it kinda slid off me in hindsight.
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Weapons: Okaaay? / Great
17 elementary school children, all from the same class, simultaneously run off into the night at 2:17am and disappear. Only one child and the [new] teacher from that class remain, so of course the teacher becomes the victim of a literal witch hunt as the townsfolk assume her being the one thing linking the disappearance of their otherwise disparate kids is damning enough to basically harass her into an admission of guilt and revelation of the whereabouts of the children. The teacher attempts to confront the lone child, assuming herself that he must know something about his classmates, finds herself at his front door where things are... not right.
A weird one. I expected horror, and got more of a "cerebral" vibe, which isn't bad necessarily, but I think the combination of a the, well, not "unique," but certainly "unusual" way they chose to tell this story and the fact that it's ultimately very obtuse made it fairly perplexing in the end. I find it hard to have a strong opinion on it. I kinda feel the need to watch it again knowing what I know, but a lot of it is intentionally tacit, so I honestly feel there's not much to have missed. I dunno; someone smarter than me, feel free to clue me in.
17 elementary school children, all from the same class, simultaneously run off into the night at 2:17am and disappear. Only one child and the [new] teacher from that class remain, so of course the teacher becomes the victim of a literal witch hunt as the townsfolk assume her being the one thing linking the disappearance of their otherwise disparate kids is damning enough to basically harass her into an admission of guilt and revelation of the whereabouts of the children. The teacher attempts to confront the lone child, assuming herself that he must know something about his classmates, finds herself at his front door where things are... not right.
A weird one. I expected horror, and got more of a "cerebral" vibe, which isn't bad necessarily, but I think the combination of a the, well, not "unique," but certainly "unusual" way they chose to tell this story and the fact that it's ultimately very obtuse made it fairly perplexing in the end. I find it hard to have a strong opinion on it. I kinda feel the need to watch it again knowing what I know, but a lot of it is intentionally tacit, so I honestly feel there's not much to have missed. I dunno; someone smarter than me, feel free to clue me in.
A ★★ review of Blade: Trinity (2004)
“He hates me, doesn’t he?” The first two films had relatively untroubled productions, save for a director shift for the second movie. The same most definitely could not be said for this movie. Guillermo del Toro did not return to direct, and reportedly Stephen Norrington was asked to direct...
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K-Pax: Good / Great
A man calling himself "Prot" (Kevin Spacey) is institutionalized after making claims that he is a being from another planet. One doctor (Jeff Bridges) takes particular interest in this delusion, and is dragged down an inexplicable rabbit of curiosity as it becomes evident his new patient might not be delusional at all.
I watched this exactly once when it came out a couple decades ago, so the details were fuzzy, but I recall coming away still wondering if Prot was actually an alien, and after this second watch a few minutes ago... I'm still wondering if Prot was actually an alien. But mostly I was reminded, scandals aside, how captivating an actor Spacey is. Might put on The Usual Suspects tonight; haven't seen that one in a minute either.
A man calling himself "Prot" (Kevin Spacey) is institutionalized after making claims that he is a being from another planet. One doctor (Jeff Bridges) takes particular interest in this delusion, and is dragged down an inexplicable rabbit of curiosity as it becomes evident his new patient might not be delusional at all.
I watched this exactly once when it came out a couple decades ago, so the details were fuzzy, but I recall coming away still wondering if Prot was actually an alien, and after this second watch a few minutes ago... I'm still wondering if Prot was actually an alien. But mostly I was reminded, scandals aside, how captivating an actor Spacey is. Might put on The Usual Suspects tonight; haven't seen that one in a minute either.
The irony is that we watched Ocean's Eleven because my girl was really into Wolfs (that Apple TV thing Clooney and Pitt did) and wanted more of the same so yes, she loved Ocean's.
She writes m/m fanfiction and is a sucker for any media that's predicated on a very particular kind of easy-breezy, slightly cheeky male friendship and/or camaraderie. She also loves Elliot Gould, who's always "OG Spike Spiegel" ever since we watched The Long Goodbye.
A ★★½ review of Screamboat (2025)
“Are you seeing what I’m seeing, or am I just f*cking high?” “It is a small world after all.” ...LOOK, HEAR ME OUT ON THIS. This was a fairly low-key production, but one thing to clarify here is that while the existence of this movie may lead one to think the writers and director hate Disney, it...
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Quantum of Solace
They really thought they could just spray-paint a 5' 9" Ukrainian mavka and call her Bolivian, huh.
They couldn't even get the name right - it's Camila, not Camille, dumbasses.
They really thought they could just spray-paint a 5' 9" Ukrainian mavka and call her Bolivian, huh.
They couldn't even get the name right - it's Camila, not Camille, dumbasses.