Do you think you're 'Normal'?

[Riku'sTwilight]

'Normal' was the only word I could think of for a catchy title.

I will explain what I mean....

After having recently chat to friends (both hetero and homo sexuals) I descovered that when it came around to them discovering what gender they preferred, they kinda just 'knew'. It may have taken a little while to figure it out, but when it clicked for them, they were content in knowing they had made the right choice.

Now here's my question - was it easy for you to decide upon which gender you preferred, or did it take you a while to figure out? I want you to think about this hard, and not just give responses like 'I was born straight/gay/whatever so therefore I grew up and followed it' because sure, that may have been your case, but can you honestly say there has never been a time where you doubted your sexuality, or experimented?

My own personal case is that I like women, although this has varied dramatically - when I was at school, I liked school-aged girls (a similar age to me at the time), when I was at university I liked girls a few years older than me, and now that I am out of university and into a working world I like older women (about 10-15 years older). However I have doubted my sexuality at one time, for a while I wasn't attracting any female attention and strangely lots of male attention, and so I thought I might be gay. I never acted upon it, but I did discuss it with a few of my gay friends (gay and lesbian friends) and just decided that it was a weird coincidence, and they were right, my female attention quickly returned after that.

However on a weird side note, and this is where the heart of my 'normality' question comes into play - Apart from one or two very special girls over the years, I don't really feel much for the girls I go out with, yet I go out with them to appear 'normal' as someone in their 20's who lives alone, and who doesn't have a girlfriend isn't really normal behaviour by any means.

So to conclude - how 'normal' are you? and do you do specific things to appear normal? and also how did you know what gender you like? have you ever had any doubts about your sexuality?

 

[Lucem712]

Well, I never really doubted my sexually per-say. I did have some really close relationships with same-sex friends and didn't really understand at that time how strong your feelings of love can be (At least in the platonic sense) but as I grew up my friends and I realized I had an issue with seeing them naked. I don't like, I absolutely hated dressing out for P.E and would stare at my locker.

It's not that I have an issue with nakedness, I can see a man or lady naked, no big deal. It's with friends that this occurs, something about the intimacy of that kind of knowledge just rubs me the wrong way.

So, never really doubted I was attracted to men but I did get my feelings clouded up in an age where I'd lost my mother and was searching for a mother-like figure; which I found in my best-friend, just in the protective sense, haha.

TL;DR

Never doubt sexuality, foggy understanding between what defined strong platonic love and romantic love, and discomfort in platonic nudity.

 

[Vault101]

as someone in their 20's who lives alone, and who doesn't have a girlfriend isn't really normal behaviour by any means.
?

I'd say its "normal" for alot of people, some peopel jsut arnt social or have other priorities...you can still be "normal" in that you have a job and and like a ncie member of society (dont have any cats or wear tin foil hats)

I mean its good if you enjoy going out with girls and such...but you shouldnt have to just to "apear normal" and its not particually fair them

at one point I pretended that I cared abotu socilaising and being cool to be "normal" but then I realised I was just un happy...I was more happy doing my own thing on a saturday night

anyway....

and for me....well....Im going to be completly honest here (againt my better judgment)

Spoiler: stuff I really cant belive Im saying

somtimes I wonder....

I'm female....Ive had pretty much 0 experience in that area

after watching Black swan...I realised.."that" was kind of a turn on (actually a huge turn on)...and in other stuff as well

that doesnt mean I like girls though...I could say its just a small thing or a phase

but like I said I havnt had much experience eather way ...so I couldnt say 100% eather way (had a boyfreind and the opertunity..but never did...jsut couldnt...I dont think I was that attracted to him)

so as I said

sometimes I wonder...

 

[Commonly Confused]

When I was younger, I would make comments about "this boy" or "this girl" being cute. I honestly never thought anything of it; I suppose I assumed it was normal. I was sitting in church one morning and the preacher was talking about homosexuality being a sin. I remember thinking very briefly on it before deciding that, if was really that bad, I would find out sooner or later.

As I grew older, I realized that there was a name for someone who was attracted to both genders, but I never really figured it was a big deal. When I told my mom in seventh grade, she cried and that shook me up for a while. So I tried pretending but ended up going back to what was "normal" for me.

 

[The Thinker]

Aw man. I had a funny anecdote all lined up for talking about normalcy. But then you were asking a question about sexuality, which I don't have humorous stories about. Sorry.

 

[TheYellowCellPhone]

I'm straight, probably still will be in a few years. I just never thought of boys in a more attractive way: first was that I learned about being gay a bit late, second the obvious homophobia that plagues the middle school-era, third that I never got to experience it any way. It wasn't until some of my friends came out that I started thinking of it more seriously. Still, it never clicked that I would like men. Still only fifteen, so stick around and see if anything changes.

Still haven't dated a girl, or shown any interest in dating any--many reasons for that, most of which I'm conscious of and don't want to fix right now. Funnily enough, I have this suspicion that my homophobic parents think I'm gay, and I find it the funniest freaking thing in the world.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

I can appear normal, I can blend in but should you get to know me...

I do not consider myself normal. I really don't want to be normal. I want to be me.

 

[Heronblade]

No, I'm not, at least not in the sense of acting like the typical straight male of my generation.

Simply put, I'm definitely heterosexual, but am not particularly interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with anyone at the moment, and have even less interest in a one night stand.

 

[Sightless Wisdom]

Take this with a grain of salt; I'm 17 currently, turning 18 this year.

Disclaimer aside, I've always been more attracted to women and considered myself completely heterosexual. Lately I'm not as sure. Not because I've felt attracted to other guys in such a way that I would want to date them or anything, but enough on occasion to make me wonder. It's not as if sexuality is completely binary, and I think it's likely that right now some different chemical reactions are making me slightly more appreciative of the male form than I have been in the past.

All to say... I'm essentially heterosexual but sexuality is almost never completely one way or the other.

 

[Radelaide]

Currently, the only normal thing about me is my dosage of medication.

 

[Lavi]

Nope, lesbian through and through in that I have NEVER wanted to have sex with a dude. Ever.

Gender, on the other hand, well, I'd rather it just not be around.

 

[mik1]

Hmmm I've considered that I was bi before because I do find some men vary attractive.
When I think about getting down and dirty however, I have no desire to receive or give any love.

 

[Zeema]

Nope, im far from normal. i have 8 persona's living in my head of varied beliefs, ideas and thoughts about human kind. Dissociative Identity Disorder makes me feel unique. its very terrible to say, but its true. without my Persona's i would have had no one too talk too and there my friends

 

[Kae]

My normality is probably off since everybody keeps telling me how weird I am, I don't really make an effort to appear normal because to tell you the truth I don't know what normal is nor I particularly care about it, what gender I like is pretty easy I mean whenever I start having romantic thoughts I always picture myself with a woman so therefore it's obvious I like women and not men, as for doubts about it well one time when my best friend told me he was gay and that those times we went out before were supposed to be dates but I never realized it, after that I thought about it for a while but after thinking about it I realized I didn't want to be with men like that, as for any other confusion well I'm pretty much deathly afraid of sex so that's a little confusing.

 

[Tanakh]

So to conclude - how 'normal' are you? and do you do specific things to appear normal? and also how did you know what gender you like? have you ever had any doubts about your sexuality?

- Normal enough I guess. But my friends say I am quite weird, all of them, present and past.

- Yeah, go to bars, go to see crap movies, force a laugh here and there, some others. Not a big deal though, all of the thigs i do are things that i just don't care about, nothing that would actually be against what i belive.

- Lust basically, some girls i wanted to taste and... well, you get the idea. Never happened with dudes.

- Nahh, but same as you, at some points i have had more sucess with gay guys than with girls... sucks.

Also, mhee, it's common to go out with girls that you don't really feel much towards, like VERY common, you are totally normal there; though nomrally is just for sport and not "to appear normal".

About age, well, when i was 16 i liked girls 10 years older. Now I really don't care about the age, because i don't care about a relationship either.

Edit: A piece of (unasked) advice, you are a young adult, leave that "am I normal?" angst to the highschoolers. IMO concentrate on making enough money to be able to do the stuff you want (current and future), enjoy life and avoid doing a long therm commitment unless you have really though it trhough and are willing to keep it the rest of your life. The rest? Mhee, who cares about what boring people think? Trust yourself mate, even if you are not normal, follow your path.

 

[Creator002]

Yes, as long as being alone and not wanting to go out or talk to anyone is considered normal.
My personality may be a deviation from the rest of society's, but I don't believe that I'm in anyway abnormal nor do I have any diagnosed conditions, mental or biological, that could make one "abnormal".

As for sexuality, I've never really doubted it, though I have considered that I was bisexual at one stage, because I thought a few guys were good looking. I know now that thinking someone is good looking does not mean you want to jump into bed with them.

 

[TehCookie]

I never doubted by sexuality because I love who I love. I'd say I'm not normal because my sexuality isn't a concrete form. I'm 80% straight and have next to no sex drive but love romance. It took me a while to find out since I was trying to put myself in one of the terms people use, until I just said fuck that my sexuality is fluid and will probably change.

If you're not just talking about orientation, yes I am weird. I question the norms of society which makes many people uncomfortable. I seek refuge on the internet where people who deviate from the norm gather.

 

[BehattedWanderer]

Normal? Nope. Every single person I've gotten to know well enough, and quite a large portion of the people I've only just met, have told me "You're strange", or something like it. I'm okay with it. I know what I like. If I'm with someone and they suggest something a little bit...different, ten to one, I'm at least down to try. You ought to look into the Kinsey Scale, OP, it might help you understand the concept of sexuality a little bit better. It's not just a binary thing, after all, of whether you just like dudes or ladies. There's a whole range.