Dont know what to do

[LeonLethality]

Okay so this is going to be anonymous except me of course my names already seen whatever so, I have a huge problem facing me, my girlfriend's parents are getting a divorce she wants to stay with her dad because a) she hates her step mom and b) she wants to stay here with me and her friends, now her step mom has a much more likely chance of gaining custody over her, her step mom doesn't trust me for fear of me being bad influence, using her etc. her dad knows I'm a good person and wouldn't do anything like that, but if her mom gains custody she wont be able to see me, I have helped this girl so much through so many tough times, I don't wish to lose her, and I don't know what to say to her to make her feel better... I feel somewhat useless and scared, does anyone know what I can do to help I cannot do anything court involving it's far beyond my power, but anything to at least make her happy? I'm desperate.

 

[Deef]

Flowers. For her and her step mom, that way they're both happy and if the step mom gets custody she'll have a reason to like you.

 

[Lullabye]

Okay so this is going to be anonymous except me of course my names already seen whatever so, I have a huge problem facing me, my girlfriend's parents are getting a divorce she wants to stay with her dad because a) she hates her step mom and b) she wants to stay here with me and her friends, now her step mom has a much more likely chance of gaining custody over her, her step mom doesn't trust me for fear of me being bad influence, using her etc. her dad knows I'm a good person and wouldn't do anything like that, but if her mom gains custody she wont be able to see me, I have helped this girl so much through so many tough times, I don't wish to lose her, and I don't know what to say to her to make her feel better... I feel somewhat useless and scared, does anyone know what I can do to help I cannot do anything court involving it's far beyond my power, but anything to at least make her happy? I'm desperate.

how old are you guys? she doesnt have to b an adult to testify. I know, my ex-dad tried getting custody over me, i just went to the bench(we got this in court) and said i dont wanna go with him. they asked some questions i answer truthfully and bam! i got to stay with my mom and her family. You sound like a good guy, it'll work out for the best. That being said, is staying the best thing for her? really think about that, i dont know ur situation but make sure you are not trying to keep her for yourself or making her feel guilty, etc etc etc...

 

[beddo]

*sings* "I don't wanna wait, for our lives to be ov-ee-er!"

 

[super_smash_jesus]

What lullabye said, she gets to have her own testimony to say where it is she wants to live, and that will almost always be granted barring some sort of incompetence on her dads part.

 

[LeonLethality]

yeah but her dad did drugs VERY recently and thats going to be something she will use against him and to answer lullabye she is 15 i am 16

 

[Vanguard_Ex]

If the step mother does get custody, she can't physically stop your girl seeing you. Fuck her if she thinks she can interfere with your love life. She should stand up in court and plead to go with her dad.

 

[Tech Team FTW!]

If she really wants to live with her father, and he is not going to endanger her, the court will probably let her stay with him. Though don't rely on it.
A memorable quote from a juror:
"I knew he was guilty as soon as he walked in the room, just by the look of him."

Oh OP, you may want to cahnge your avatar, I thought you were a woman. : P

 

[LeonLethality]

A huge thing with her is, she is scared to stand up for herself, she has an inferiority problem that makes her scared of it, and i have helped her a lot this I don't think I can I want to find the words to tell her to stand up for herself... and her step mom says she loves her but her parents like JUST got married and now are divorcing its a horrible thing

 

[Vanguard_Ex]

Then she needs you now more than ever, you need to get her to plead but stick with her through it. I don't understand where the competition is though, surely the biological father has much more right to have custody of his own daughter?

 

[Erana]

A huge thing with her is, she is scared to stand up for herself, she has an inferiority problem that makes her scared of it, and i have helped her a lot this I don't think I can I want to find the words to tell her to stand up for herself... and her step mom says she loves her but her parents like JUST got married and now are divorcing its a horrible thing

Really, why does she want to stay with her father?
Not to sound critical and narrow minded, or something, but a lot of kids like one parent over the other because one of them has to act as the disciplinarian. It sounds like her step mother is looking out for her best intrests.

I can't make a judgement from what little information I've been given, but look at things objectively. Will her step mother work harder for her well being? If her step mother would be better in the long run, then do the selfless thing and let her go.
Just keep that in mind.

 

[Bat Vader]

Okay so this is going to be anonymous except me of course my names already seen whatever so, I have a huge problem facing me, my girlfriend's parents are getting a divorce she wants to stay with her dad because a) she hates her step mom and b) she wants to stay here with me and her friends, now her step mom has a much more likely chance of gaining custody over her, her step mom doesn't trust me for fear of me being bad influence, using her etc. her dad knows I'm a good person and wouldn't do anything like that, but if her mom gains custody she wont be able to see me, I have helped this girl so much through so many tough times, I don't wish to lose her, and I don't know what to say to her to make her feel better... I feel somewhat useless and scared, does anyone know what I can do to help I cannot do anything court involving it's far beyond my power, but anything to at least make her happy? I'm desperate.

She might be able to appeal to the court system and say who she wants to live with. Also, her step mother really can't keep you two apart. If you two really want to see each other you both can. Also, maybe she could bring you to court and you could testify for her. She could tell you what to say and you could say it.

 

[RetiarySword]

Kill the step mom?

 

[LeonLethality]

Really, why does she want to stay with her father?
Not to sound critical and narrow minded, or something, but a lot of kids like one parent over the other because one of them has to act as the disciplinarian. It sounds like her step mother is looking out for her best intrests.

I can't make a judgement from what little information I've been given, but look at things objectively. Will her step mother work harder for her well being? If her step mother would be better in the long run, then do the selfless thing and let her go.
Just keep that in mind.

well, she really hates her step mother, and her father is the only blood relative she has left that she knows... her father is a great person from what i have seen he, i found the drug thing hard to believe, he looks out for her and does much more for her than her mom...

She might be able to appeal to the court system and say who she wants to live with. Also, her step mother really can't keep you two apart. If you two really want to see each other you both can. Also, maybe she could bring you to court and you could testify for her. She could tell you what to say and you could say it.

that sounds like a great idea it wouldn't be the first time i would have appealed to a court so i know i can do it, but... i don't know best idea so far

 

[iJosh]

Bake her a lemon pie. Women like food but are too self conscious to has it.
Then when they eat it, they will be happy.

 

[Erana]

well, she really hates her step mother, and her father is the only blood relative she has left that she knows... her father is a great person from what i have seen he, i found the drug thing hard to believe, he looks out for her and does much more for her than her mom...

Why does she hate her?
Why is blood relations so important?
What sort of drugs are being alleged here?
What does her father do for her that her stepmother doesn't? I mean, does he take care of the important things like insurance and monitoring her school grades, take care of meals, etc?

Sorry if I'm asking so many questions, its just that I know a lot of people who prefer their father figure because they play the "fun parent" role. The more strict parent is often the one who does all the dirty work.

 

[LeonLethality]

Why does she hate her?
Why is blood relations so important?
What sort of drugs are being alleged here?
What does her father do for her that her stepmother doesn't? I mean, does he take care of the important things like insurance and monitoring her school grades, take care of meals, etc?

Sorry if I'm asking so many questions, its just that I know a lot of people who prefer their father figure because they play the "fun parent" role. The more strict parent is often the one who does all the dirty work.

I don't know exactly why she hates her, i never asked into it too much, the blood thing is because she wants to have family its something i couldn't understand i have lots of family, the drugs were pretty bad meth i think, though not %100 sure, her father is the main income he owns the house he has a good job he buys the food and pays like 80% of the bills, her mom works part time and only pays like 20% of the bills, and well, its just if it weren't for the drug thing of course her dad would get custody but... drugs are a pretty big thing...

 

[brighteyesblackenedlungs]

various point that need answered some already asked

what other reasons than you does she have to stay with her father
why does she dislike her step mom
where is her real mom
what country do you live in (the laws differ)
would you be willing to do what is right even if it hurts?

 

[Goldeneye103X2]

Kill the step mom?

Thats......slightly extreme. But whatever.

 

[SharPhoe]

Holy crap. Holy CRAP. Your name, your avatar, your current situation, all of those made me think that you were my best friend. I had to check and see where you were from to verify. That was creepy.

As for your dilemma, if you're incapable of doing anything legally, then I'm afraid your hands might just be tied on this one...