Dumbest Things Heard In School

[darkless]

A girl in my class today asked if Napoleon was a midget.
When asked, she said that he lived in Spain, and that he had a high voice.

Didn't he have that whole "midget" thing thrust upon him by lieu of being badmouthed by his enemies?
I recall reading something that was roughly of that nature.

I think it was more so that his body guards where just freaking tall, or something.

 

[This-is-Hip-Hop]

Well, nothing is truly stupid, or dumb for that matter, its usually just misunderstanding or someone who simply misheard. But once when I told someone that I was a Chef, he immediatedly started laughing, when I questioned his laughter, he replied.

"Dude, you can't be a chief, your not even an Indian, Your Black!"

I quickly repeated myself, and he walked away mumbling an apology, while admiting his fault through insulting himself.

-This-is-Hip-Hop

 

[Tartarga]

In history class we were watching Band of Brothers

Woah, you watched Band of Brothers?

Can I join your school?

Sure, as long as you don't mind idoit rednecks and incompetant teachers than go right ahead.

Oh...umm...I think i'll just rent it.

That would be wise.

 

[Hazy]

This happened last year in my American History class while we were watching the Normandy beach landing in Saving Private Ryan:

"Who's he?"
*Tom Hanks is shown* "Is that Ryan?" (also asked whenever any other guy showed up on screen)
"Why is that old guy sad?"
*at the cemetery* "Is this Normandy?"
"Why are they in boats?"
"Why doesn't the dead guy tell Tom Hanks that he's dead and doesn't need to be carried anymore?"
"Won't they be eaten by sharks?"

You get the idea. (all of these were asked by a class full of 11th graders.)

Where in the world was the *Facepalm* vendor when you needed him?
Seriously, you have my sympathy.

 

[theultimateend]

"Because God would never hurt anyone good"

Day-umn. For the supposed saviour of the human race Jesus must have been one bad guy to get crucified.
Is flipping tables really that bad in God's eyes?

Religion: Contradiction is fun.

Well the trick with Jesus is people tell you he wasn't a person but instead the holy ghost in the form of a human. It gets really convoluted and makes even less sense than the literal story but people like to say it.

That would be a radical interpretation of the text. Theologically, Jesus is not the same person as the Holy Spirit; He is a distinct Person within the Trinity. Furthermore, He did not take on the form of a human; He became human.

Religious Radicals? Now that's a group of people you'll never find yourself listening to in the US .

But yes, I realize there are holes in it, but there are usually large holes in most of the logic people try to take from the bible.

 

[Hazy]

A girl in my class today asked if Napoleon was a midget.
When asked, she said that he lived in Spain, and that he had a high voice.

Didn't he have that whole "midget" thing thrust upon him by lieu of being badmouthed by his enemies?
I recall reading something that was roughly of that nature.

I think it was more so that his body guards where just freaking tall, or something.

You know, that actually rings a bell.

 

[Deleted]

"How do I calculate the mass of a polyatomic ion like Nitrite combined with Pb(lead) wien the charge is supposed to be -1?"

Fucking idiots, the lot of them |

 

[Citrus]

A girl in my class was very proud of her idea that we could stop global warming by building giant air conditioners outside.

Also, my Social teacher drew the swastika backwards and pronounced it wrong (it is not "swas-tee-kah"; it is "swas-tik-ah"), but then again, everybody seems to make that mistake. You'd think a Social/History teacher would know better, though.

And I know a guy who thought Canada was part of the Axis powers.

 

[Darth Pope]

I've never been witness to any stupidity of a mentionable nature at my school, but:

"What's so bad about communism?"

*Epic face palm*

The first two are beyond retarded; would you care to explain this one?

I suppose this one is a little ambiguous.

One must only look at history to see that Communism doesn't work. Sure it looks good on paper but it just doesn't work in practice.

You can't pay a doctor the same thing as a guy sweeping the gravel off of train tracks and expect results.

 

[skywalkerlion]

This happened last year in my American History class while we were watching the Normandy beach landing in Saving Private Ryan:

"Who's he?"
*Tom Hanks is shown* "Is that Ryan?" (also asked whenever any other guy showed up on screen)
"Why is that old guy sad?"
*at the cemetery* "Is this Normandy?"
"Why are they in boats?"
"Why doesn't the dead guy tell Tom Hanks that he's dead and doesn't need to be carried anymore?"
"Won't they be eaten by sharks?"

You get the idea. (all of these were asked by a class full of 11th graders.)

...what...the...eyafff....Is wrong with your utterly retarded classmates?

Why doesn't the dead guy tell Tom that he's dead? Seriously? And why is he sad?

I can just imagine that random ranting and whispering going on in the classrooms..

*highly emotional movie scene plays*

..why is he crying? ;(?

 

[soren7550]

This happened last year in my American History class while we were watching the Normandy beach landing in Saving Private Ryan:

"Who's he?"
*Tom Hanks is shown* "Is that Ryan?" (also asked whenever any other guy showed up on screen)
"Why is that old guy sad?"
*at the cemetery* "Is this Normandy?"
"Why are they in boats?"
"Why doesn't the dead guy tell Tom Hanks that he's dead and doesn't need to be carried anymore?"
"Won't they be eaten by sharks?"

You get the idea. (all of these were asked by a class full of 11th graders.)

Where in the world was the *Facepalm* vendor when you needed him?
Seriously, you have my sympathy.

As a result of that whole event, the teacher never wanted to show a movie in class ever again and I got stuck in a several days long argument w/ a few of the 'tards on how there are no sharks in French waters because it's too cold.

 

[darkless]

A girl in my class today asked if Napoleon was a midget.
When asked, she said that he lived in Spain, and that he had a high voice.

Didn't he have that whole "midget" thing thrust upon him by lieu of being badmouthed by his enemies?
I recall reading something that was roughly of that nature.

I think it was more so that his body guards where just freaking tall, or something.

You know, that actually rings a bell.

Not sure how accurate it is but Link [http://europeanhistory.about.com/od/bonapartenapoleon/a/napoleonheight.htm] It states that his bodyguard had a height restriction that made him look short but mostly they believe it was a conversion problem when autopsied he was noted as being 5 foot 2 inches but french measurements where different to British ones apparently.

 

[Deleted]

I've never been witness to any stupidity of a mentionable nature at my school, but:

"What's so bad about communism?"

*Epic face palm*

The first two are beyond retarded; would you care to explain this one?

I suppose this one is a little ambiguous.

One must only look at history to see that Communism doesn't work. Sure it looks good on paper but it just doesn't work in practice.

You can't pay a doctor the same thing as a guy sweeping the gravel off of train tracks and expect results.

Yet we can pay actors more than we pay teachers. Communism would work of those damn people would do as they're told!

 

[RAAAAAR]

A few few years ago, in math: When is noon?

And two kids make me rage every day because they insist Obama's a communist, because their 'dads tell them that.'

 

[RebelRising]

I've never been witness to any stupidity of a mentionable nature at my school, but:

"What's so bad about communism?"

*Epic face palm*

The first two are beyond retarded; would you care to explain this one?

I suppose this one is a little ambiguous.

One must only look at history to see that Communism doesn't work. Sure it looks good on paper but it just doesn't work in practice.

You can't pay a doctor the same thing as a guy sweeping the gravel off of train tracks and expect results.

It is ambiguous; I don't think any real historian could legitimately claim that any governmental (also: religious, philosophical) concept or ideal is fundamentally flawed or fundamentally perfect.

The truth is that communism, as it has been carried out in the last century, is much more monarchistic in nature than it is anarchistic, like its modern thinkers described it, such as Etienne Cabet and Karl Marx. Anyways, that's a a subject for a whole other day.

 

[skywalkerlion]

A few few years ago, in math: When is noon?

And two kids make me rage every day because they insist Obama's a communist, because their 'dads tell them that.'

Their parents are, most likely, redneck racists.

 

[Stalias]

No joke, this happened in Game Developement.
Our teacher is having us play jeopardy so one team picks "Games" for 500.
"Super Smash Bros. can be played on what system?"
Doesn't specify which one, but anyone who plays nintendo knows it's N64, Gamecube, and Wii. The answer was:
"Xbox 360, Xbox 360Live, PS3, Wii, and various cell phone devices."

 

[userwhoquitthesite]

10th grade english.
the quote: "She could feel them, pelting her with their dirty thoughts like rocks"
My teacher claimed this to be personification. It is not. It is a simile. This particular example is memorable because it was the final straw of a school year full of piss-poor english teaching. I got into a shouting match with her. I won.

 

[Darth Pope]

I've never been witness to any stupidity of a mentionable nature at my school, but:

"What's so bad about communism?"

*Epic face palm*

The first two are beyond retarded; would you care to explain this one?

I suppose this one is a little ambiguous.

One must only look at history to see that Communism doesn't work. Sure it looks good on paper but it just doesn't work in practice.

You can't pay a doctor the same thing as a guy sweeping the gravel off of train tracks and expect results.

Yet we can pay actors more than we pay teachers. Communism would work of those damn people would do as they're told!

It goes beyond this. Corruption and greed are also an inescapable part of human nature. These two factors absolutely wreak havoc on a society that is supposed to be classless and those in power are in a position to take what they want.