Dumbest Things Heard In School

[Racistman3d]

"school is shit cause they don't learn you nothing"
Not actually said, but written down once when we had to write about what we liked and didn't like at school.

 

[Nigh Invulnerable]

Teacher: "Semen has some glucose in it."
Student: "Then why doesn't it taste sweet?"
Teacher: "Probably because you've only gotten it in the back of your mouth."

Best. Teacher. Ever.

Talk about ownage. That chick got slammed. It's like Mike Tyson vs. a quadriplegic.

 

[TankCopter]

In my music class last year, we got this little gem:

"Who's John Lennon?"

There was also the incident of the list of countries involved in WW2 that didn't have Poland on it. I have yet to forgive my History teacher for that.

 

[Plumpdragon]

The most stupid thing I ever heard in school was during english class.

The teacher told us about famous english literature and mentioned "Alice in wonderland".
When I told her I had read the book and its sequel called "Through the Looking-Glass" she said I was wrong to say the book had a sequel and no matter what I said completely refused to believe "Through the Looking-Glass" existed!.

So for the next time we had english class I rented both books from the library and presented them to her with the whole class present.

20 years have passed since I took that class but I think her face is STIL red with embarrassment

 

[Ninonybox_v1legacy]

evrything an anti-smokeing gang has said during one of those godawful assemblies

"remember kids if you don't smoke you can be just like us" 30 min later *puff puff puff* "SMOKE FASTER" *puff puff* "DAMNIT WHERE OUT OF SMOKES" *searching for a cig* "OH FUCK NO"

 

[Nigh Invulnerable]

In my music class last year, we got this little gem:

"Who's John Lennon?"

There was also the incident of the list of countries involved in WW2 that didn't have Poland on it. I have yet to forgive my History teacher for that.

I would hardly rate not knowing who John Lennon is as a bad thing, just maybe unfamiliar with dead celebrities. If said person was a Beatles fan though...

I recall a girl in 5th grade who didn't know whether the US or England won the Revolutionary War.

 

[evan573]

the other day my year 11 maths class was asking about the navy and what our teacher had done in it.

one of the guys asked "do they (the navy) have a plan for when their ship sinks?"

5 minutes later he asked 'does it hurt when your eardrums burst?'

funnily enough he tends to do well in school, its just that he asks stupid questions.

 

[PolitikiL]

Review for an exam
some girl is holding the review in her hand and shouts out "When are we going to get the review" The teacher tells her that is the review, she then proceeds to complan "but this is all the work we've done this year."

 

[konkwastaken]

I know the average person apparently can't name all 50 states. Which is kind of a shocker to me. I admit some are process of elimination but it seems like a simple thing to remember.

Me and my friend managed to make a list of all 50 states in english class and we got them all correct, even got some of the capital cities too.

If two 16 year old boys from Australia who have never been to america can name them all of the states and the average american cannot, there is something seriously wrong with your education.

(neither of us take or have ever taken geography or anything of the sort)

 

[blankedboy]

I saw a movie in which a university class was being taught about Pangea. Epic lol.

Nothing springs to mind...

 

[ExplosionProofTaco]

evrything an anti-smokeing gang has said during one of those godawful assemblies

"remember kids if you don't smoke you can be just like us" 30 min later *puff puff puff* "SMOKE FASTER" *puff puff* "DAMNIT WHERE OUT OF SMOKES" *searching for a cig* "OH FUCK NO"

Someone has been watching South Park... But it is true nonetheless.

 

[Crystal Cuckoo]

"Do the Socceroos play rugby?"

"I still don't understand the whole radioactive rock dating thing. Why would you want to date a rock?" (In her defence, she had a shocking teacher.)

Chick: I'm smart! No, seriously! Ask me a question!
Random: Okay.. What's 5 x 5?
Chick: 5! No! 0!

xD

 

[Motti]

There was also the incident of the list of countries involved in WW2 that didn't have Poland on it. I have yet to forgive my History teacher for that.

So he forgot the first country to be invaded in WWII. You'd think the history teacher would remember something important like that.

 

[AngloDoom]

Teacher: "Did you know that the Great Barrier Reef comes into fertilisation all at the same time? Scientists aren't quite sure how it happens, but at almost exactly the same time the reef releases egg and sperm into the ocean all at once...in a kind of soup."

Class: "Ewww!"

Stereotype Blonde: "Wait, if you go swimming at that time of year, would you get pregnant?"

Me (Being unhelpful): "HALF-MAN! HALF-FISH! ALL ACTION!"

 

[Ninja Tank]

"Xbox 360 programs it's own game so it is way better than PC"
I told him to bring prove to back up that statement.
It has been 1.5 years since the day he said that statement and no prove!

 

[Ninja Tank]

Teacher: "Did you know that the Great Barrier Reef comes into fertilisation all at the same time? Scientists aren't quite sure how it happens, but at almost exactly the same time the reef releases egg and sperm into the ocean all at once...in a kind of soup."

Class: "Ewww!"

Stereotype Blonde: "Wait, if you go swimming at that time of year, would you get pregnant?"

Me (Being unhelpful): "HALF-MAN! HALF-FISH! ALL ACTION!"

LoL

 

[Toasty]

I've never been witness to any stupidity of a mentionable nature at my school, but:

"What's so bad about communism?"

*Epic face palm*

The first two are beyond retarded; would you care to explain this one?

I suppose this one is a little ambiguous.

One must only look at history to see that Communism doesn't work. Sure it looks good on paper but it just doesn't work in practice.

You can't pay a doctor the same thing as a guy sweeping the gravel off of train tracks and expect results.

Yet we can pay actors more than we pay teachers. Communism would work of those damn people would do as they're told!

and shifting gravel is hard work

 

[n00beffect]

"Bulgaria (my country) was once a strong nation,you should be proud of it!" damn i am so sick of hearing that already.. if we were ever such a strong mother furking nation then why are we such wimps now... geez!



[/idiocracy]

 

[Roundhousekickintheface]

In textile class( which i know longer do )

Teacher: Can any one think of some animals you can get leather from?
Student: BABOON BUTT!!!